No new Tool album in 2014

2015-01-03 by Will R. EMERITUS | 97 Comments
Given that it is now undeniably 2015 and given that it is unlikely that Maynard James Keenan will transport all 7 billion people living on Earth back in time just to counter this news article, it seems safe to say that Tool will not be releasing an album in 2014.

The non-event became official at approximately 12:00 AM on Thursday, January 1st. Though the ever swirling rumors seemed to suggest that this year was the year Tool would release their ever-anticipated 5th studio album (no, seriously! Danny Carey tweeted about it or something!), it appears that sadly, this is not the case.

It seems that disgruntled fans, rather than hearing the dulcet tones of Adam Jones' guitar in a totally new 11/8 framework, will be forced to jam Lateralus again instead. In what we will try to assume is an expression of condolence to his fanbase, Maynard James Keenan tweeted something about his wine.

Tagged: Tool

Comments:Add a Comment 
Brostep
Emeritus
January 3rd 2015
4491 Comments


damn such a disappointment

BigPleb
January 3rd 2015
65784 Comments


Damn, so disappointed :[

Ryus
January 3rd 2015
36789 Comments


great news lol

SCREAM!
January 3rd 2015
15755 Comments


We can just fast forward to 2016 we have our news of the year for 2015 right here

BMDrummer
January 3rd 2015
15099 Comments


lol perfect

Uranium
January 3rd 2015
7549 Comments


it all makes sense now

beefshoes
January 3rd 2015
8443 Comments


Not surprising tbh. They always wait until the last minute.

TumsFestival
January 3rd 2015
2470 Comments


Brand New has had a new album coming in 2012 since 2010

RogueNine
January 3rd 2015
5542 Comments


Official at 12:00 in which time zone?

Brostep
Emeritus
January 3rd 2015
4491 Comments


Was gonna specifically say Honolulu but I figured that'd be superfluous since yall know what I mean

treeqt.
January 3rd 2015
16970 Comments


overrated joke idea

oltnabrick
January 3rd 2015
40653 Comments


Delete this

NordicMindset
January 3rd 2015
25137 Comments


very funny

zaruyache
January 3rd 2015
27401 Comments


Mods should just rename and bump this thread each year it doesn't come out. See you in 2016.

MyNameIsPencil
January 3rd 2015
6637 Comments


Neither did Brand New, but you don't see me making a news article about that bit of news.

TalonsOfFire
Emeritus
January 3rd 2015
20969 Comments


Modest Mouse is releasing a new album in two months so who cares about this anymore at this point

tempest--
January 3rd 2015
20634 Comments


NEWS

01-03 No new Tool album in 2014
12-06 Update on Tool lawsuit
07-15 Tool lawsuit delays new album
07-16 Tool Album to be released 2014
02-06 No new Tool album in 2013


Rowan5215
Staff Reviewer
January 3rd 2015
47611 Comments


love you Brostep haha

TheSonomaDude
January 3rd 2015
9076 Comments


No new Tool album in 2015.

Skoop
January 3rd 2015
2201 Comments


damn well I guess that clears shit up

NordicMindset
January 3rd 2015
25137 Comments


bold prediction

Slut
January 3rd 2015
4255 Comments


Lol

PapyrIsGood
January 3rd 2015
79 Comments


Oh.

MO
January 3rd 2015
24019 Comments


hehe nice

chemicalmarriage
January 3rd 2015
4297 Comments


I heard North Korea is blocking the release of the new Tool record herp derp lol but srsly imho js god damn shit the bed imo

meTaLhEadDRummR
January 3rd 2015
23 Comments


Can't possibly live up to the expectations after all these years. Gonna be a 3/5 like all their other albums.

Scoot
January 3rd 2015
22201 Comments


No new Tool album in 2014
No new Tool album in 2015
No new Tool album in 2016
No new Tool album in 2017
No new Tool album in 2018
No new Tool album in 2019
No new Tool album in 2020
No new Tool album in 2021
No new Tool album in 2022
No new Tool album in 2023
No new Tool album in 2024
No new Tool album in 2025
No new Tool album in 2026
New Tool album in 2027
Maynard James Keenan dies

NakedSnake
January 3rd 2015
665 Comments


I don't understand how a lawsuit could keep their album from being released. ?

chemicalmarriage
January 3rd 2015
4297 Comments




Rip maynard james kreenan

NordicMindset
January 3rd 2015
25137 Comments


They can tour,but they can't write?

beachdude
January 3rd 2015
849 Comments


Quality news

Keyblade
January 3rd 2015
30678 Comments


Brand New has had a new album coming in 2012 since 2010

Neither did Brand New, but you don't see me making a news article about that bit of news.

Modest Mouse is releasing a new album in two months so who cares about this anymore at this point


On a Tool news article. Does it get any more Sput than this?

SharkTooth
January 3rd 2015
14922 Comments


This sucks

Artuma
January 3rd 2015
32769 Comments


"Modest Mouse is releasing a new album in two months so who cares about this anymore at this point"

a lot of people because the new modest mouse single was kinda lackluster

Pajolero
January 3rd 2015
1423 Comments


I'm not sure how to feel about this.

NordicMindset
January 3rd 2015
25137 Comments


Well, Tool backwards is loot so maybe...

jfromnj
January 3rd 2015
116 Comments


One of my favorite bands that has slipped into irrelevancy by simply being out of sight out of mind for too long. Will I check out a new album? Absolutely. Do I even care anymore? No. Sadly.

sleepdirt
January 3rd 2015
511 Comments


Maybe they're busy working on their 6th album.

Anthracks
January 3rd 2015
8028 Comments


Why do people care about this band?

SharkTooth
January 3rd 2015
14922 Comments


Because they're good?

Dreakon
January 3rd 2015
453 Comments


Source?

TheSpaceMan
January 3rd 2015
13614 Comments


"given that it is unlikely that Maynard James Keenan will transport all 7 billion people living on Earth back in time just to counter this news article"

please dont instigate this I hated 2014 more than i like tool

DrGonzo1937
Staff Reviewer
January 3rd 2015
18289 Comments


"Maybe they're busy working on their 6th album."

I think you're on to something.

FlyheadMetal
January 3rd 2015
2422 Comments


"Maybe they're busy working on their 6th album."

lololololl

DrGonzo1937
Staff Reviewer
January 3rd 2015
18289 Comments


Two albums for 2015.

TheSpaceMan
January 3rd 2015
13614 Comments


^^ I'd laugh so damn hard if they release two albums like a month apart

Artuma
January 3rd 2015
32769 Comments


"please dont instigate this I hated 2014 more than i like tool"

why

DrGonzo1937
Staff Reviewer
January 3rd 2015
18289 Comments


I wouldn't complain. haha

Parallels
January 3rd 2015
10146 Comments


"given that it is unlikely that Maynard James Keenan will transport all 7 billion people living on Earth back in time just to counter this news article"

Just so they can record the album backwards in two days, send it back to 2014, then release it back to the future for 2015 to be played forward, right? Sounds like something stupid they would do.

"Maybe they're busy working on their 6th album."

Good one.

TheSpaceMan
January 3rd 2015
13614 Comments


@art

lost a great relationship, became an alcoholic, continued to loose friends to drugs, had to quit my job to focus on school, and had an awfully difficult semester, etc

though a new tool album would be pretty sweet lol

Tunaboy45
January 3rd 2015
18429 Comments


No shit

FlyheadMetal
January 3rd 2015
2422 Comments


It's odd to think I was in 4th grade last time a Tool album came out.

auxilia
January 3rd 2015
40 Comments


It's okay maybe we'll get another Puscifer remix album. That makes it better right?

DoctorDoom
January 3rd 2015
2987 Comments


@auxilia your sarcasm is brilliant but I just threw up a little.

DoctorDoom
January 3rd 2015
2987 Comments


What's the over/under on this, @5NightsAtFreddys?

VinVal
January 3rd 2015
1167 Comments


obv

DoctorDoom
January 3rd 2015
2987 Comments


Fuck it. If I lived in a 2 million dollar house and had my own wine, what kind of angst would I have left?

SharkTooth
January 4th 2015
14922 Comments


Lol you're saying Tool's songs are angsty

iamSeraph
January 4th 2015
928 Comments


best news article in a long time ( :

Wizard
January 4th 2015
20510 Comments


Hilarious news article.

Gonna go jam Ænima for the billionth time!

TheSpirit
Emeritus
January 4th 2015
30304 Comments


I would be perfectly content if these guys never released anything again.

Wizard
January 4th 2015
20510 Comments


Me too because 10,000 Days was pushing a 3.9 and Tool is not allowed to release anything below a 4.

ChoccyPhilly
January 4th 2015
13628 Comments


is Jari Maenpa their manager or something?

aWanderingSpirit
January 4th 2015
7 Comments


You've just got to enjoy the silence between the notes to truly appreciate the sound

theacademy
Emeritus
January 4th 2015
31865 Comments


hahaha so glad u did this

theacademy
Emeritus
January 4th 2015
31865 Comments


Possible Tool Album in 2015

2015-01-04 by John Lennon Beat His Wife STAFF | 1 Comment

It is now 2015 and we may receive a Tool album this year, which we didn't receive in 2014.

Tagged: Tool Tweet

Brostep
Emeritus
January 4th 2015
4491 Comments


Oh man please please post that

someguest
January 4th 2015
30126 Comments


Tool writes Tool article

DrGonzo1937
Staff Reviewer
January 4th 2015
18289 Comments


Tooling around

Voltimand
January 4th 2015
1670 Comments


This thread is such a Toolshed.

SaneTBP
January 4th 2015
2127 Comments


lol gj

5am
January 4th 2015
71 Comments


Report: No New Tool Album on 1/3/2015

Storm In A Teacup
January 4th 2015
45744 Comments


If Eros comes out in 2015 it will make Tool even less relevant.

Artuma
January 4th 2015
32769 Comments


^ how stoned are ya?

TalonsOfFire
Emeritus
January 5th 2015
20969 Comments


It'll happen this year, I have a feeling. Though I also had a feeling it would happen last year too...

wwba
January 5th 2015
480 Comments


"If Eros comes out in 2015 it will make Tool even less relevant."

Eros won't change anything, Tool will always be more relevant than Deftones.
They made like 7 (?) albums and their popularity is still leagues below the likes of Korn, Slipknot and System of a Down.

While Tool is easily one of the most popular prog-rock bands, we could say they are at the top of their game... unlike Deftones... if you say numetal, most people will think of Breaking Benjamin or Slipknot... if you say progressive rock, most people will think of Tool or King Crimson or Rush

so yeah the real difference is this... Tool is one of the biggest bands in its genre... Deftones will never be among the kings of numetal, the bands with 10 000 000 ++ likes on fb Slipknot, System of a Down and KoRn

dawija1017
January 5th 2015
691 Comments


Love the irony of all the tools saying Tool sucks

tempest--
January 5th 2015
20634 Comments


deftones actually have more likes on fb than tool. more listeners on last.fm too.

NordicMindset
January 5th 2015
25137 Comments


lol facebook likes

DrGonzo1937
Staff Reviewer
January 5th 2015
18289 Comments


Doesn't matter if it comes out in 2018, even the haters will give it a spin.

Hoppoman
January 5th 2015
723 Comments


No Tool album released in the 2nd Millennium.


Egarran
January 5th 2015
34009 Comments


Worst week of the year.

Impervious
January 5th 2015
1213 Comments


NEWS

01-03 No new Tool album in 2014
12-06 Update on Tool lawsuit
07-15 Tool lawsuit delays new album
07-16 Tool Album to be released 2014
02-06 No new Tool album in 2013 [2]

lol facebook likes [2]

The people that talk about how great Tool is, have annoyed me so much that I haven't listened to them.


Impervious
January 5th 2015
1213 Comments


NEWS

01-03 No new Tool album in 2014
12-06 Update on Tool lawsuit
07-15 Tool lawsuit delays new album
07-16 Tool Album to be released 2014
02-06 No new Tool album in 2013 [2]

lol facebook likes [2]

The people that talk about how great Tool is, have annoyed me so much that I haven't listened to them.


rayraypine
January 5th 2015
122 Comments


This is the SotY for 2015.

Voltimand
January 6th 2015
1670 Comments


^That band even around still?

UnnamedOcean
January 6th 2015
3989 Comments


Face it, they are never making another album. They just enjoy dicking around with their fans.

Brabiz
February 4th 2015
2197 Comments


Does anyone even care anymore? At this point, the album will be released and everyone will be like "That's cool. i guess"

Egarran
February 5th 2015
34009 Comments


That's an adorable notion.

macman76
December 20th 2016
2122 Comments


Terrence Malik has been regularly making movies, tool's move should be to release like 2 double albums, a mix tape, and an ep compilation for like 50 iterations of the Fibonacci sequence

Storm In A Teacup
December 20th 2016
45744 Comments


dammit mac don't encourage them

InFlamesWeThrash666
December 20th 2016
10558 Comments


No New Tool album in 2016

Storm In A Teacup
December 20th 2016
45744 Comments


No new Tool album in 2010s

onionbubs
December 20th 2016
20857 Comments


lol tool

zaruyache
December 20th 2016
27401 Comments


should submit that news article on the 31st

Storm In A Teacup
December 20th 2016
45744 Comments


yea

theacademy
Emeritus
December 20th 2016
31865 Comments


yes im stoked



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