tracklist is so long that i had to spam the shit out of this fucker to avoid getting cucked by the number 30 fuck you taylor fuck you capitalism

but yh new album confirm etcetc

Re:RED - Reincarnated as a Sexy Female Bard in an Online Game?!

this will be 30 tracks long yet still shorter than the fucking news article I had to read to find that information

These news articles are incredibly tiresome and unfunny. Not every sentence needs to be a "witty" one-liner. Genuinely painful to read.

ebola

happy to see row make it to the second sentence (yes the very second sentence and also the fourth one bc you can't be too careful) in a sputnews article for the first time in uh uh uh uh pending // nice one

"Begin Again (Shinedown cover)" i fell for this and i'm so mad. i want the 30 seconds back where i genuinely believed this was a thing, my brain was so joyfully broken

(22 more)

leave johnny alone guys


he has nowhere else to express himself like this

nowhere

sputnik news is the only thing stopping me from deadass starting a fakenews blog ye

just work for the hard times

just work for newsmax

did livejournal go down or something

wrong generation

bet

wrong for you maybe

who else

Johnny can you do a write-up for the new DN track

we think we are wise, we think we our free
we think of these things, then johnny says ye
johnny says ye, johnny says ye
the rest of us ponder, how can this be?
though he’s a weeb, the site can agree
nothing’s the same after johnny says ye
what does it mean though? will we now see,
a swarm of old boomers, saying ye with glee?
ye during breakfast, ye during tea
a ye for all ye is a ye just for me

13. Pretty Handsome Awkward

Whoah wtf is Tay Tay covering The Used or is this part of whatever Johnny thinks he’s doing

Really hyped for this. Especially the 10 minute version of All Too Well.

Miss the days when Taylor used to post on Sputnikmusic under the moniker RiffOClock

Gotta say, I don't like these editorialized news articles lol

these garbo news articles have gotten beyond old

speak for yourself, this is hilarious

I was speaking for myself

it’d be fine if it wasn’t overdone

some of yr best work johnny

I enjoy Johnny's articles. They have soul.

now this is news

state of grace might be one of her best songs tho

it’d be fine if it wasn’t overdone [2]

it’d be fine if it wasn’t overdone [3]

Haven’t posted on here in ages but imo this kind of thing is exactly what leads a lot of people to roll their eyes at the whole site nowadays. “News” posts like this just scream to me that the person posting thinks their opinion is so important and valuable that they have to put it front and center any opportunity they get.

I’m not even saying they aren’t funny at all, but now that almost every “news” post is basically just a “look how cool I am with my special hot takes” shitpost it just reinforces what a lot of people have thought about this site for years… that it’s an insular community of neckbeard elitists who turn their noses at 95% of new stuff that comes out. Which if you guys wanna double down on that, you do you… but personally I don’t think it makes many new users want to join, let alone contribute.

FWIW I was a contributor for a while myself, although that shouldn’t matter in regards to the arguments I’m making. Just how I personally see it… feel free to all fucking clown on me now, I know how this usually goes.

damn didnt realize the greater internet community thought of us that way...gonna rethink my contributions from now on

the only problem with johnnys articles is how obscenely try-hard the articles in this vein are. ima need you to be more covert with your attempts at entertaining me. that's really the only thing wrong with what he does.

“It would be badass to become a virgin again. First time to cum in a pussy after 5 seconds and first time to fuck for over an hour, first time to make a woman orgasm, first time to be lied to about being the biggest they ever had (I’ve seen porn I know there’s bigger than 7.5 inches and I’m probably your 50th 🙄) Would be awesome lol” -Storm In A Teacup

reported

the time between those two comments is less than 5 minutes too lmao

beachdude what are you talking about, I see an unacceptable amount of praise for new stuff on here

I like how she skipped her first three LP's and went straight to when she abandoned country

Almost like she realized those first three records had nothing worth it on them and went straight to her good music.

what are you talking about, she already did Fearless like this

Oh shit u right my bad

Not sure if I'm gonna listen to it cuz I fuckin hate her country era

You gave me a few minutes of joy reading this johnny, thank you. From the shallow depths of my malnourished and shriveled heart, thank you.

(feat. Phoebe Bridgers of Better Oblivion Community Center)

hmm..

Honestly, this was really entertaining. Good read. Take the thanks of a foreigner.

i had a really good laugh reading this, thanks for making taylor have entertainment value for me

My girlfriend loves her, so I listened to an unhealthy amount of Taylor Swift material. Can't she take a break for a while, lately she's been too productive

She should make a thrash album

Remember when some Black metal artist claimed Taylor Swift ripped off his cover for one of his albums for Folklore?

I've always thought she should make black metal

https://consequence.net/2020/07/ihsahn-taylor-swift-artwork/

LMAO I FOUND IT

"In sharing the post, Ihsahn quipped, “So, anyone check out the new @taylorswift yet? Personally I like the design.”

Haha, fkn luv ihsahn

it’d be fine if it wasn’t overdone [1,000,000]

Haven’t posted on here in ages but imo this kind of thing is exactly what leads a lot of people to roll their eyes at the whole site nowadays. “News” posts like this just scream to me that the person posting thinks their opinion is so important and valuable that they have to put it front and center any opportunity they get.

I’m not even saying they aren’t funny at all, but now that almost every “news” post is basically just a “look how cool I am with my special hot takes” shitpost it just reinforces what a lot of people have thought about this site for years… that it’s an insular community of neckbeard elitists who turn their noses at 95% of new stuff that comes out. Which if you guys wanna double down on that, you do you… but personally I don’t think it makes many new users want to join, let alone contribute.

FWIW I was a contributor for a while myself, although that shouldn’t matter in regards to the arguments I’m making. Just how I personally see it… feel free to all fucking clown on me now, I know how this usually goes.

Jesus

how do I wash a baseball cap

if these type of news articles were posted on Pitchfork y'all would call it a try hard shitpost, if ya'll wanna clown her write a review.

"if ya'll wanna clown her write a review"

fuck outta here

no u

if ur gonna bring that attitude here go put it in a news article plz

Write a review so I can post more rants about sputnikmusic professionalism

okay actually wait a second I know how this usually goes.

Oh boy here we go girls!

hang onto your stools stooges

Taylor Swift Shinedown cover




Taylor Swift Shinedown cover

Yikes.

30. All Too Well (31 Minute Version)

Johnny for the love of god think of the reputation of sputnikmusic dot com in the year twenty twenty-one

news piece format would be fine if it was funny and not basically a 2009 RYM review

discourse is outstanding

"Begin Again (Shinedown cover)" i fell for this and i'm so mad. i want the 30 seconds back where i genuinely believed this was a thing, my brain was so joyfully broken
[2]
why u gotta fuckin play us like this mayn