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Mitch
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Last Active 09-03-22 1:19 am
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Iron Maiden Epics: Ranked

Criteria: Must be the longest track on the album, or exceed 7 and a half minutes.
37Iron Maiden
Virtual Xi


The Angel and the Gambler

Don’t you think I’m a savior? Don’t you think I can save ya? Don’t you think I could save your life? [x10,000]


No, fuck off.
36Iron Maiden
Senjutsu


Lost In a Lost World

9 minutes of uninspired, monotonous, sloppy, low effort hogwash. It was this particular song that made me realize that something was very VERY wrong with Senjutsu. Maiden, I love you, but would it kill ANY of you to fucking try? Fuck this boring ass song, and it’s ludicrous runtime.
35Iron Maiden
Senjutsu


Senjutsu

I have no fucking clue how they managed to make this into an 8 minute song, it barely has enough material to make a 3 minute one. This track literally sounds like the band is actively dying a slow painful death while we are forced to sit and listen to it.
34Iron Maiden
A Matter of Life and Death


Brighter Than a Thousand Suns

Duller than a thousand nuns.
33Iron Maiden
The Final Frontier


Isle of Avelon

Long and boring.
32Iron Maiden
Senjutsu


Death of the Celts

I’m convinced Steve has completely given up on writing interesting music. Slow, boring dogshit, just like every other song on Senjutsu. Garbage.
31Iron Maiden
The Final Frontier


Starblind

Long and slightly less boring.
30Iron Maiden
Virtual XI


Don’t Look to the Eyes of a Stranger

This song & The Angel and the Gambler are the 2 reasons why I don’t love Virtual XI. It sucks, because the rest of the material on there is pretty damn good.
29Iron Maiden
The Final Frontier


The Talisman

Bruce, stop trying to hit these fucking high notes dude. Be a good boy, and sing within your current range.
28Iron Maiden
Senjutsu


The Parchment

Honestly forgot this song was even on the new record, and that’s NOT a good thing. Try harder Steve.
27Iron Maiden
The Final Frontier


When the Wild Wind Blows

The wind isn’t the only thing that blows.
26Iron Maiden
The Final Frontier


The Man Who Would Be King

Why is this 8 minutes long?
25Iron Maiden
The Book of Souls


Shadows In the Valley

Book of Souls would have been better without this song.
24Iron Maiden
A Matter of Life and Death


The Legacy

Passable.
23Iron Maiden
Piece of Mind


To Tame a Land

Easily the worst epic the band released in their golden era. Not awful, but it's a little too mild and easygoing for my taste.
22Iron Maiden
Brave New World


Nomad

Probably my least favorite track on Brave New World, but it’s still pretty decent.
21Iron Maiden
Senjutsu


Hell on Earth

The only song on Senjutsu that is any good. Mostly because I really like that riff that plays in the instrumental section and again towards the end. Seems Maiden squeezed all the limited energy they had left into this one song.
20Iron Maiden
A Matter of Life and Death


The Longest Day

There's a really good song in here, but it goes on too long like most modern Maiden tracks. Trim this down to 5 minutes and you’ve got something really solid.
19Iron Maiden
Seventh Son of a Seventh Son


Seventh Son Of a Seventh Son

Dig the atmosphere on this track, but that chorus is pretty lazy. They probably should have spent a little more time developing this one.
18Iron Maiden
Brave New World


Dreams of Mirrors

Solid epic track. Not their best, but FAR from their worst.
17Iron Maiden
The Final Frontier


Satellite 15… The Final Frontier

I have a soft spot for this one. Lots of people hate the strange opening, but I kinda dig it. It’s rare that 21st century Maiden releases something that sounds new or unique, so it’s kinda refreshing to hear this odd, borderline industrial opener. The 2nd half is basically it’s own song, and it’s pretty good too.
16Iron Maiden
The Book of Souls


If Eternity Should Fail

Good start to a great album. Really like that spoken word portion at the end; it’s kinda spooky.
15Iron Maiden
The X Factor


The Unbeliever

Really underrated track here. Blaze always had trouble displaying emotion in his performances with the band, but he really owns it on this song.
14Iron Maiden
Dance of Death


Dance of Death

Wasn’t a big fan of this one for a while, but I’ve come around on it. The tempo shift towards the end is actually pretty exciting.
13Iron Maiden
A Matter of Life and Death


For the Greater Good of God

I’m pretty vocal when it comes to my distaste for this album, but this song is great. Easily the best track off A Matter of Life and Dearth.
12Iron Maiden
Virtual XI


The Clansman

FREEDOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! No joke, I used to think this song was about the KKK.
11Iron Maiden
Powerslave


Rime of the Ancient Mariner


This is gonna piss everyone off, but whatever. In the context of the album it works great, but I never really find myself listening to it by itself.
10Iron Maiden
Somewhere in Time


Alexander the Great

Really love the different sections of this track. The lyrics could’ve used a little work, but the overall package is great
9Iron Maiden
Brave New World


The Thin Line Between Love and Hate

I’ve always loved this song. It’s rare that a Maiden track gets me emotional, but this one does it.
8Iron Maiden
Iron Maiden


Phantom of the Opera

This song is batshit crazy, and I love it. Absolutely impossible to play on Rock Band.
7Iron Maiden
The Book of Souls


The Red and The Black

A modern Maiden song with a 13 minute runtime that actually warrants it’s length; truly a miracle. I thought it was too long on my first few listens, but now I think it’s the perfect length.
6Iron Maiden
Dance of Death


Pachendale

I fuck with this song hard. Not even Kevin’s muddy-as-fuck mix can ruin this one for me. This war epic literally decimates every single track found on the next record which almost exclusively focuses on the same topic.
5Iron Maiden
Fear of the Dark


Fear of the Dark

Amazing song from Maiden’s most underappreciated record. Like, name one person who doesn’t love this track.
4Iron Maiden
The X Factor


Sign of the Cross

Blaze or Bruce, doesn’t matter. This song is a borderline masterpiece.
3Iron Maiden
The Book of Souls


Empire of the Clouds

I’m convinced Book of Souls was a fluke. They put out an 18 minute track that is thoroughly engaging and exciting throughout, while on the next record they struggle to make songs half this length worth listening to. Fluke or not, this song is brilliant, and may be the last time we will ever hear Maiden giving us 110%.
2Iron Maiden
The Book of Souls


The Book of Souls

Honestly one of my favorite Maiden songs. The main guitar riff is fucking wicked, Bruce hands in some strong vocals, and the last 5 minutes is a journey filled with passionate solos and a surprisingly tight rhythm section. I’ve always had mixed feelings on the 3 guitarist line-up, but this definitely benefits from their inclusion. Seriously, give this song another listen, it’s fantastic.
1Iron Maiden
The Number of the Beast


Hallowed Be Thy Name

Perfection. Pretty much the gold standard for all metal epics along with Stargazer.
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