judasgoat
User

Soundoffs 131
News Articles 52
Band Edits + Tags 2
Album Edits 13

Album Ratings 401
Objectivity 85%

Last Active 05-27-19 1:24 am
Joined 02-02-15

Review Comments 367

Average Rating: 3.37
Rating Variance: 1.11
Objectivity Score: 85%
(Well Balanced)

Chart.

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5.0 classic
Anathema A Natural Disaster
Bell Witch Mirror Reaper
Four Phantoms was a superb album and even that seems underdeveloped compared to this. One of the best records of the year, easily.
Devin Townsend Ocean Machine: Biomech
Devin Townsend Project Deconstruction
Elliott Smith Either/Or
Elliott Smith Elliott Smith
Giles Corey Giles Corey
Nick Drake Pink Moon
Red House Painters Red House Painters
Sigur Ros Agætis byrjun
Songs: Ohia Didn't It Rain
Strapping Young Lad City
Sun Kil Moon Ghosts of the Great Highway
The Antlers Hospice
The Caretaker Everywhere at the End of Time
The Cure Songs of a Lost World
Weezer Pinkerton

4.5 superb
!T.O.O.H.! Pod Vladou Bice
!T.O.O.H.! Order and Punishment
Anathema We're Here Because We're Here
Anathema Weather Systems
Anathema Distant Satellites
Bell Witch Four Phantoms
Chat Pile God's Country
Tbh fuck this album for being as good as it is
Cocteau Twins Treasure
Cocteau Twins Blue Bell Knoll
Crippling Alcoholism Camgirl
Cryptic Shift Overspace & Supertime
Cult Leader Lightless Walk
When this band's Facebook page popped up, it had a simple statement: "We once were another band, and now we're a better one." Considering they formed from the ashes of Gaza, that's a bold claim. But Lightless Walk backs it up and then some with the most savage album of the year. Like having your face shoved into an axe grinder for 40 minutes. Jam it now, you narcissistic fucks.
Cult Leader A Patient Man
The band evolves beautifully on this album. The heavy songs hit harder, Lucero sounds even more versatile and commanding as a vocalist, and the ballads are much more fleshed out and well-placed on the album. Cult Leader expand their horizons without losing their seething nihilism and self-loathing. Might be a 4.5 in time, honestly.
Deafheaven New Bermuda
Honestly, Deafheaven have managed to pull off an album that tops Sunbather. Where Sunbather sometimes dragged and got unfocused throughout its 60 minute runtime, New Bermuda is a pure, focused assault interspersed with calmness and beauty at just the right moments. And Come Back is probably the best song this band has done.
Devin Townsend Empath
Devin Townsend Lightwork
Devin Townsend Project Transcendence
Simultaneously a new way forward and a return to roots, Transcendence breathes new life into
Devin's music. The album is masterfully executed in nearly every detail, and letting the band
contribute has (at least in part) resulted in some of the DTP's strongest songwriting.
(Stormbending, Offer Your Light, and the astonishing title track are all perfect examples.) Easily
Devin's best album since Deconstruction.
Dir En Grey Uroboros
Dir En Grey Dum Spiro Spero
diSEMBOWELMENT Transcendence into the Peripheral
Ethereal Shroud Trisagion
Father John Misty I Love You, Honeybear
Father John Misty God's Favorite Customer
Josh Tillman drops the irony and the yuks and gets real with us, and as a result he's put out a record that stands with Honeybear as his best.
Glen Hansard It Was Triumph We Once Proposed
Only Being in Love and Farewell Transmission really bear any marks of Glen's signature
style, but the point of this EP is not to show off Glen's chops as an arranger. It's to pay
tribute to a master songwriter who passed too soon, and in that regard, this EP really
couldn't have been done better.

I have to say the best track on here is Vanquisher, which sounds like it would have if it
was recorded during the Magnolia Electric Co. era.
Have a Nice Life Deathconsciousness
Have a Nice Life The Unnatural World
Katatonia Viva Emptiness
Katatonia The Fall of Hearts
Katatonia Viva Emptiness (10th Anniversary Version)
The definitive version of this album for sure. Exponentially better than the flat and overly compressed original version, with the new keyboards and new vocals (on the final track) breathing new life into what I used to consider a bottom-tier Katatonia album. Excellent through and through.
Kendrick Lamar To Pimp a Butterfly
Low Things We Lost in the Fire
Low Double Negative
Double Negative may not be revolutionary in the grand scheme of things, but in Low's discography it's a notable revelation. Low has always been built around the gorgeous, intertwining harmonies of Alan Sparhawk and Mimi Parker, the exact thing this album wants to fuck with as much as possible. Their vocals are drowned out, distorted and pitch shifted often throughout the album. But instead of being a distraction, it adds exponentially to the cold, distant feel of the album.

But Double Negative doesn't lean on that vibe to see it through, and even tries to fight it with some humanity and warmth in a couple of songs (Always Trying to Work it Out, Disarray). Through the atmosphere lies some of Low's best modern songs in quite some time. Tempest builds some lovely layering amidst the tension of the distortion. Always Up proves once and for all that an electronic sound fits Low like a glove. Hell, the one song where Low hearkens back to their early sound (Dancing and Fire) is actually the one that sounds the most out of place. But it still works as a breather amidst all the suffocating denseness this album can provide.

Double Negative is a hell of a move for Low, and it pays off beautifully for them. It's one of Low's most cohesive, well-structured albums, and possibly their best since signing to Sub Pop. Low has been around for 25 years and can still pull off some exciting new directions.
Low Hey What
Low just can't miss. They haven't missed a single time since 1994. They just don't have the ability.
Magnolia Electric Co What Comes After the Blues
Majesties Vast Reaches Unclaimed
iN fLaMeS nEw AlBuM vS tHe HaLo EfFeCt WhO wInS

Majesties. Majesties wins.
Manic Street Preachers The Holy Bible
Moonsorrow Verisäkeet
Mourners Lament A Grey Farewell
This year has had a lot of great doom so far but I don't think anything has topped this. Every melody, growl and riff feels perfectly placed and nothing drags throughout the whole hour plus runtime. Monumental stuff.
Munly and The Lee Lewis Harlots Munly and the Lee Lewis Harlots
My Bloody Valentine Loveless
My Dying Bride The Dreadful Hours
Neurosis An Undying Love for a Burning World
hello, we're back department? you're gonna be busy for the rest of the year.
Oldest Sea A Birdsong, A Ghost
Holy fuck
Panopticon Det Hjemsøkte Hjertet
Queensryche Operation: Mindcrime
Queensryche The Warning
Radiohead A Moon Shaped Pool
Red House Painters Ocean Beach
Run the Jewels Run the Jewels 2
Run the Jewels Meow the Jewels
He sits down at his computer, tears streaming down his fertile beard as he mentally recounts the
transgression done against him. He hovers over the page in righteous anger: Meow the Jewels. He
breaks down for a second. Who could possibly do this to him? O gods, how his life has been so
ruined by the cats of fate! But nay, there is no time to cry. He gathers himself together, for he
has a job to do.

"NO!" his mother cried, "You can't! You musn't! It's an album of CAT SOUNDS!!"
"QUIET" he orders, "I MUST assert my superiority."

And yay, did he hover over the rating bar and hit submit. The deed was done. The 1 was given.

But alas, what did it mean? Not only to him, but to his fellow peers in the halls of Sputnik? Did
it matter? Did anything matter?

Only time will tell. But for now, godspeed, you brave son of a bitch, for you have truly saved
music today.
Scald Will of the Gods is Great Power
The pinnacle of epic doom as far as I'm concerned. Did Scald originate it? Hell no. But rarely is epic doom done as majestically and powerfully as it is here.
Sigur Ros ( )
Slowdive Souvlaki
Slowdive Slowdive
One of my favorite moments in music is when an influential but underappreciated band returns from a breakup or a string of garbage albums to collect their dues. Even better is when said band releases an album that makes you eager to pay up, and Slowdive check that box with ease.

It definitely helps their case that opening track Slomo is one of the best songs this band has done. Naturally flowing and beautifully layered, it's a highlight. Songs like Star Roving and Everybody Knows sees the band taking the nu-gaze movement and molding it into the band's own image. Sugar for the Pill and No Longer Making Time are ballads that make great use of Neil Halstead's delay-ridden guitar, and Falling Ashes is an encapsulation of the best parts of Pygmalion. And it all never sounds like a desperate attempt at relevance or a retread of past glories. It sounds like pure Slowdive, through and through.

This album is a joy to listen to, and a surprisingly accessible listen that keeps you coming back.
Songs: Ohia Axxess and Ace
Strapping Young Lad Alien
Sun Kil Moon April
Sun Kil Moon Admiral Fell Promises
Sun Kil Moon Benji
Swans Birthing
The Bilinda Butchers Heaven
The Devin Townsend Band Accelerated Evolution
The Frames For the Birds
The Twilight Sad It Won/t Be Like This All the Time
Will probably expand on this later, but this is probably the most vibrant and colorful album The Twilight Sad have done since their debut. Maybe even their best since then? Will need more listens to find out for sure. But yeah, I am immensely satisfied with this.
The Twilight Sad It's The Long Goodbye
Triptykon Melana Chasmata
Warning Rituals of Shame
Hurts just as much as Watching from a Distance. That ache feels as good as ever.
Weezer Weezer
Weezer Everything Will Be Alright in the End

4.0 excellent
!T.O.O.H.! Komouš
Alan Sparhawk White Roses, My God
Alan Sparhawk with Trampled By Turtles Alan Sparhawk with Trampled By Turtles
Anagnorisis Beyond All Light
Anathema The Silent Enigma
ANOHNI HOPELESSNESS
Batushka Litourgiya
Hope you've got room on your year end lists, you're missing one.
Beck The Information
Bjork Vulnicura
car colors Old Death
Car Seat Headrest Teens of Denial
In which Will Toledo drops truth bombs like a motherfucker.
Celtic Frost Monotheist
Chained to the Bottom of the Ocean Obsession Destruction
Y'all rating this 2 and 1 and shit are on crack this dooms hard bring the sludge you fucking weaklings
Chevelle NIRATIAS
They got back what was missing from La Gargola and The North Corridor and the result is their best album in a decade. Well fucking done, Chevelle.
CHVRCHES Every Open Eye
Every Open Eye is kind of like The Unnatural World of synthpop. An album that doesn't reinvent the wheel, but instead refines the band's signature sound and works to eliminate any lingering weaknesses. The result is an album that feels much more cohesive than Bones, but has just as many standout songs. Definitely a winner.
Cigarettes After Sex Cigarettes After Sex
With their self-titled debut, Cigarettes After Sex have made an official entrance onto the scene with a fully formed sound, almost to a fault. Structure-wise, the album can get repetitive. But it's easy to forgive when the melodies are this nice and the atmosphere is this well executed. When those elements really come together, like they do on the arresting Flash and glacial album highlight Opera House, you can hear the world of potential the group has.

Greg Gonzalez has developed quite a knack for expressing a deep romantic longing without sounding cloying or relying on cliches (as K. and Each Time You Fall in Love can attest) and that longing blends seamlessly with the music, thanks to his smooth vocals. Yes, it can be repetitive, but it's also memorable, idiosyncratic, and a perfect example of sustaining a mood throughout a full-length album. Very promising indeed.
Cigarettes After Sex Cry
CAS has not changed their formula here at all. But somehow that formula is still potent and results in great songs? Fine by me. I totally get how people would be turned off by the exact same thing again but I am definitely not.

If they don't switch things up for the next one, though, then I'd have to start asking some serious questions.
Cocteau Twins Heaven or Las Vegas
Cocteau Twins Victorialand
Comatose Vigil Fuimus, Non Sumus...
Dan Deacon Gliss Riffer
Death Grips Bottomless Pit
ARSENIC LIQUID CHROME MY CARCASS FOR MY THRONE VCR SALIVA SMOG CHINA SWIPED ALRIGHT ALRIGHT
ALRIGHT ALRIGHT

...ahem...This album is pretty good.
Devin Townsend Terria
Devin Townsend Ziltoid the Omniscient
Devin Townsend The Puzzle
SMiLE by Devin Townsend
Devin Townsend The Moth
Devin Townsend Project Ki
Devin Townsend Project Addicted
Devin Townsend Project Epicloud
Devin Townsend Project Z2
Sky Blue - An excellent and emotive expansion of Epicloud's sound. More cohesive than Epicloud,
too, and Fallout, Midnight Sun and Rain City stand among Devin's best. 4.3

Dark Matters - Definitely does not have as much depth as the first Ziltoid, and the story isn't
always well told, but it's still a load of fun, and March of the Poozers is absolutely infectious.
3.8

Average: 4. I know how to math.
Dragged Into Sunlight Hatred For Mankind
Faye Webster I Know I'm Funny haha
bruh what are these overall ratings for this and faye's last album lol 3.4? 3.3? embarrassing showing here sput v disappointed
Folterkammer (USA) Die Lederpredigt
Gas Der Lange Marsch
The high frequency isn't even that bad "what r u guys on lmao (crack)" [2]
Gojira Magma
Magma sees Gojira not only turning their past weaknesses into strengths, but also turning them into a new way forward, one that was certainly needed after L'Enfant Sauvage. The Shooting Star, the title track, and Pray are all highlights as well as perfect examples of the more primal atmosphere the album as a whole adopts, especially during its second half. Those who had fears that the band was becoming overly simplistic due to the singles have nothing to worry about, either. The style is simpler, but the album has much more substance than the singles suggest.
J. Tillman I Will Return
Jack White No Name
Katatonia Discouraged Ones
Katatonia Sky Void of Stars
Katatonia Nightmares as Extensions of the Waking State
Keaton Henson Monument
LCD Soundsystem American Dream
Leprous Pitfalls
Not only do we get aaaaAAAAAAaaaaas but we also get hey-heys, eyaeyaaaaeyaeyaaaaeyaaaaas, oooooooooooohhhhs, OH-OH-OHOHOHs, and WOAH-O-WOAH-O-WOAHs too. I really don't know what y'all are complaining about.
Low Long Division
Low I Could Live in Hope
Low Trust
Low Drums and Guns
Low Ones and Sixes
Ones and Sixes is essentially the best parts of what Low has done over the past ten years rolled into one album.
Magnolia Electric Co Magnolia Electric Co
Magnolia Electric Co Fading Trails
Melt-Banana 3+5
WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Meshuggah Immutable
Not gonna lie, it's hella impressive that after 30 years, these Swedes can still make a hour-plus long album feel like half that length considering the style of music they play. The highs are HIGH and the lows are barely even blips on the radar. Their best in a hot minute.
Metallica Death Magnetic
Moonsorrow Kivenkantaja
Musk Ox Inheritance
Just *barely* misses the heights of Woodfall, but fuck me, this absolutely rules on its own merits. This band can do no wrong.
My Dying Bride A Mortal Binding
Napalm Death Apex Predator - Easy Meat
Ningen-Isu Burai Houjou
Our Lady Peace Spiritual Machines
Our Lady Peace Naveed
Primitive Man Immersion
Punky Bruster Cooked on Phonics
Queensryche Rage For Order
Queensryche Empire
Queensryche Promised Land
Queensryche Queensryche
Queensryche Queensryche
Queensryche Condition Human
An excellent expansion of the self-titled album that infuses a little more of that classic Queensryche sound as well. The band have really forged their own identity here, and tracks like Guardian, Hellfire and the title track can slot in proudly among the band's best tracks. And yes, Todd soars on this.
Queensryche The Verdict
Red House Painters Down Colorful Hill
Red House Painters Songs for a Blue Guitar
Red Moon Architect Fall
Run the Jewels Run the Jewels
Sigur Ros Takk...
Sleater-Kinney No Cities to Love
Songs: Ohia The Lioness
Stereolab Instant Holograms On Metal Film
Strapping Young Lad Strapping Young Lad
Taylor Swift 1989
So I guess I'm a Taylor Swift fan now. Considering that this album is pure pop bliss, there are far worse things to be.
TesseracT Altered State
TesseracT Errai
If Polaris sounded more like this, it would have been a much better album.
The Acacia Strain Failure Will Follow
Acacia Strain are natural doomsters and I absolutely hope they keep going in this direction in the future. Out of both albums they dropped, this is for sure the better of the two.
The Antlers Familiars
The Antlers Green to Gold
Trading pained catharsis for quiet reflection this time around, but it's no less emotional. Welcome back, lads. We've missed you.
The Bilinda Butchers goodbyes
The Bilinda Butchers Night and Blur
It's like Echoes of Silence except for weebs
The Decemberists What A Terrible World, What A Beautiful World
The Frames Burn The Maps
The Frames The Cost
The Twilight Sad Fourteen Autumns and Fifteen Winters
The Twilight Sad Forget The Night Ahead
The Twilight Sad No One Can Ever Know
The Twilight Sad Nobody Wants To Be Here And Nobody Wants To Leave
The War On Drugs Lost in the Dream
Tori Amos Ocean to Ocean
Weezer The White Album
Not quite on the level of EWBAITE, but the comeback ain't over yet, folks.
Woe Quietly, Undramatically
This is probably the only black metal album that I return to on a regular basis.
YUNG BAE Bae 2

3.5 great
!T.O.O.H.! Democratic Solution
Alva Noto Unieqav
Like the new Sleep record, Unieqav is repetitive in the right ways. The compositions gradually shift along its 50+ minute runtime, which surprisingly feels much shorter than it is. It never feels boring or stale, but instead feels hypnotic, inviting you to get lost in the stuttering beats while the music evolves around you. You'd think that a record like this wouldn't work at all, but it really does.
Beck Hyperspace
Black Sheep Wall I'm Going to Kill Myself
Blue October Approaching Normal
CHVRCHES Love Is Dead
Their weakest album for sure but CHVRCHES haven't lost it just yet. They probably should have trimmed this thing down though. Love 'em, but 50 minutes of CHVRCHES is pushing it a bit.
Cocteau Twins Head Over Heels
Cocteau Twins Four-Calendar Cafe
Cocteau Twins Milk and Kisses
Coldplay Ghost Stories
Cryptopsy The Book of Suffering - Tome 1
A bit of a step down from the excellent self-titled album (especially Matt McGachy's vocals) but
overall this is a fine outing. Cryptopsy are at their best when they devolve into pure chaos, so
sections like the middle of The Knife and the gravity blasts near the end of Framed by Blood are
quite welcome.
Daughter Not to Disappear
David Bowie Blackstar
Devin Townsend Physicist
Devin Townsend Project Ghost
Dir En Grey The Unraveling
Dir En Grey Arche
Filter The Trouble With Angels
Filter Crazy Eyes
After Filter's creatively bankrupt previous album, a change like this one was sorely needed. And
Richard Patrick pulls it off really well, adding in a healthy dose of electronics and just enough
quirkiness to make the album stand out.

Unfortunately, the album does go back into standard rock mode for the second half, but the last
two tracks make up for it. Very solid overall.
Godspeed You! Black Emperor 'Asunder, Sweet and Other Distress'
Not AOTY material, but the payoff is immensely satisfying.
Gojira Fortitude
"I understand how opinions work but you suck if you think this sucks" [2]
Iron Maiden The Book Of Souls
J. Tillman Long May You Run, J. Tillman
J. Tillman Minor Works
J. Tillman Untitled No. 1
John Frusciante Maya
With Maya and this year's Trickfinger releases, John seems to have really found his sound in the IDM world. It's a very smooth album with a good chunk of memorable samples and songs. It flows very well as an album too, something that isn't always focused on with IDM. This was a great listen for sure.
Khanate To Be Cruel
Oppressive, bleak, doomed, bitter...really, what else could you ask for?
Lady Gaga The Fame Monster
Low Secret Name
Low C'Mon
Low The Invisible Way
Marissa Nadler Strangers
Megadeth The Sick, the Dying… and the Dead!
Metallica St. Anger
Moonsorrow Voimasta ja Kunniasta
Moonsorrow V: Hävitetty
Myrkur M
NAILS You Will Never Be One Of Us
No Devotion Permanence
It's not perfect, and the transition from Death Rattle into 10,000 Summers is jarring at best, but there is nonetheless a good deal of quality music to be found here. Permanent Sunlight, Why Can't I Be with You, I Wanna Be Your God and Night Drive are the standouts.
Noel Gallagher's High Flying Birds Noel Gallagher's High Flying Birds
Noel Gallagher's High Flying Birds Chasing Yesterday
Opeth The Last Will and Testament
It's nowhere near the masterpiece it's being touted as, but it does have a lot going for it. The concept is really well done and fits Mikael's writing like a glove. At first it feels a little slapdash, but repeat listens are very much rewarded.
Our Lady Peace Burn Burn
Queensryche Tribe
Red House Painters Red House Painters II
Red House Painters Old Ramon
Red Moon Architect Concealed Silence
Say Anything ...Is a Real Boy
Say Anything Say Anything
Songs: Ohia Impala
Songs: Ohia Ghost Tropic
Steven Wilson The Future Bites
This is legitimately the most enjoyable Steven Wilson album in quite some time. Dude lost the plot hard with the prog shit after Raven so it's nice to hear him try something else and have it work this well. I'd almost call King Ghost a career highlight. And yes, I know this is the Porcupine Tree guy.

EDIT: Forgot Raven existed lmao. That one was good.
Strapping Young Lad The New Black
Strapping Young Lad Heavy as a Really Heavy Thing
Sufjan Stevens Carrie and Lowell
Sun Kil Moon Tiny Cities
TesseracT One
The Beach Boys That's Why God Made The Radio
The Bilinda Butchers regret, love, guilt, dreams
The Decemberists I’ll Be Your Girl
I'll Be Your Girl is a mixed bag for sure. It's easily The Decemberists' least consistent and coherent album from a band known for crafting thematic, flowing listening experiences. Some of the synthesizer experiments on the album are totally at odds with Colin Meloy's rustic lyrics (Cutting Stone being the prime example) and some songs just seem a little underdeveloped.

And yet, despite all of this, I'd still recommend this album. Why? Because The Decemberists have learned to have some fucking fun. Not weighted down by their concepts, they're free to charge ahead musically with recklessness, resulting in the exciting dance groove of Once in My Life, the tense synths giving energy to Severed, and grin-inducing harmonies punctuating Your Ghost. The eight minute Rusalka, Rusalka/Wild Rushes shows the band still has ambition, and Meloy even lets his sardonic, darker humor show in his songwriting for once, resulting in album highlight Everything is Awful. (Yes, I'm serious.)

All in all, it's a lower tier Decemberists album for sure, but I'll Be Your Girl proves that a lower tier Decemberists album is still incredibly enjoyable on its own merits. As far as gauging where the band will go, direction and quality-wise, the next album will do far more to show us, and it's easy to see this record as a stepping stone.
The Frames Fitzcarraldo
The Swell Season Strict Joy
The Wonder Years No Closer to Heaven
Wait, what is this? Pop punk is supposed to be baseless teenage angst, not something actually meaningful and resonant. What the fuck is happening?

I don't know, but this could be a 4 if I listen more.
Voivod Synchro Anarchy
I mean, it's Voivod being Voivod, there's not much else to say on it. It works because even after all this time, Voivod are really fucking good at being Voivod.
Weezer The Green Album
Weezer Make Believe
Weezer Hurley
Weezer Van Weezer
It's fun. Don't think about it too much.

ITT: People thinking about it way, way too much.
Wytch Hazel IV: Sacrament

3.0 good
Batushka Hospodi
It's definitely not the trainwreck people were expecting, but it's not too special, either. Good, but that's about it.

Panihida brought the Batushka sound and pushed it ever so slightly towards new moods and territories. Hospodi, on the other hand, is way more interested in letting you know that it sounds like Batushka. It tries REALLY hard to sound like Batushka, and it...kind of succeeds. It sounds a bit like them but with a lot more bog-standard black metal thrown in the mix. Like if you made someone listen to Litourgiya once and then told them to write a whole album immediately afterwards.

So yeah. It's aight. Not much more than that, though. And it's very clear who the brain behind Batushka is at this point.
Beady Eye Different Gear, Still Speeding
Beyonce Lemonade
Carcass Despicable
Is it god-tier Carcass? Nah. But something about those riffs still hit right.
Charli XCX Brat and It’s Completely Different but Also...
Chevelle The North Corridor
I think what people are missing when it comes to Chevelle is that even in their earlier days
(WWN/TTOT), Chevelle were never *just* heavy. They combined their heaviness with strong
songwriting, tense atmospheres and a unique melodic voice. The North Corridor has the heaviness
and atmosphere in spades, but it's sorely lacking the other two key components.

Don't get me wrong, the album is good. Door to Door Cannibals, Enemies, Young Wicked and Shot from
a Cannon are too good for me to dismiss this album entirely. But there's a prevalent sense that
something is missing. And on the whole, The North Corridor is definitely below what the band is
really capable of.
Cocteau Twins Garlands
Deftones Gore
Deftones do Deftones as only Deftones can. If you like Deftones, you're in for a treat. If not,
this won't change your mind.

Also I would love more songs like Prayers/Triangles and Hearts/Wires kthxbai
Dir En Grey Mortal Downer
Lady Gaga The Fame
Low The Great Destroyer
Low The Curtain Hits the Cast
Magnolia Electric Co Josephine
Mark Kozelek Mark Kozelek
Wow. Okay. So this is the first album of Mark's I've actually been able to enjoy since Benji. Don't get me wrong, this still in no way measures up to even that album. It's way too long and there are still some pretty dumb and pointless lyrics in here, and "The Banjo Song" is basically insufferable.

But for once, the good outweighs the bad. Mark has toned down his more confrontational side and in doing that, we actually get some nice stories and memories from him. The guitar loops are quite lovely throughout the record as well, at some points still showing that proficiency that made Admiral Fell Promises such a joy to listen to. Mark is also singing more in general, which definitely works with the mellow vibe the album has.

On the whole, it works. And it's much more enjoyable than...really, anything Mark's put out from 2015 to now.
Metallica Load
Metallica Hardwired...To Self-Destruct
Moonsorrow Suden Uni
Operation: Mindcrime The Key
For the first time since 2009, Geoff Tate has released an album that is not a complete embarrassment. That in and of itself is worth celebrating.
Queens of the Stone Age Villains
The first two and last two tracks are the best. The first two because Josh Homme fully embraces Mark Ronson's influence as well as his skill at making sleazy dance music. The last two because they're slices of classic QOTSA. Driving riffs, propulsive rhythms and Homme's idiosyncratic harmonies are all there.

The problem with this record is that Homme never fully commits to one style or another, instead going with this awkward middle ground that ends up just becoming kinda unmemorable. Villains is not a bad record on the whole, and at this point it's accurate to say that QOTSA are incapable of making a bad record. But it can also be said that they are capable of more than this.
Queensryche Hear In The Now Frontier
Queensryche American Soldier
Sigur Ros Valtari
Slayer Divine Intervention
Slayer Diabolus In Musica
Slayer Repentless
Songs: Ohia Songs: Ohia
Steven Wilson Hand. Cannot. Erase.
Sun Kil Moon Among the Leaves
Sun Kil Moon Common As Light and Love Are Red Valleys of Blood
Sun Kil Moon This Is My Dinner
This is My Dinner is probably Mark's most enjoyable album in quite some time. His ramblings keep the cringes to a minimum, and are (for the most part) focused on a theme, that being the countries he hit up on the European tour this album was written on. He's a bit more confrontational than he was on the last record this year, but it comes across as more harmless. Mark is much more humorous this time, a rare moment where his sometimes awkward sense of humor doesn't feel shoehorned into his music.

The music is so much nicer too; cleaner, more memorable, and casts Mark's stories in a much more sympathetic light. The way the gentle background of the title track compliments Mark rushing home to see his cat one last time actually makes for a surprisingly touching moment. Candles is another highlight, with the music and stories matching up perfectly.

I mean, yeah, there are some cringey spots: the end of Linda Blair, with Mark just naming off songs he likes, is a momentum-killing bore. The cover of Rock n' Roll Singer (his third at least) shows Mark holding notes for some pretty excessively long periods of time. But overall it continues the upward trend started with Mark's solo album from this year, and definitely stands as his best post-Benji work.
Swallow the Sun Shining
It's a transitional record for sure. Ironically the quieter songs are the best, like November Dust and Velvet Chains. It almost sounds ethereal wave-ish kind of? It definitely has some promise, but they don't commit to it. It's fine as it is, but I think the album after this is gonna be more important in terms of their progression for the future.
Taylor Swift Reputation
1989 showed a confident, self-assured Taylor Swift ready to take over the world. And take over the world she did. Of course, that wasn't without its consequences, as we all know.

On reputation, Swift has had her confidence shaken, and she's lashing out. The defensive attitude shows itself everywhere, from the confrontational lyrics and song titles (Look What You Made Me Do, Call it What You Want) to the loud, but introverted and closed-off music. The EDM/trap influenced music is awkward at best, ill-fitting with a lot of Swift's lyrics. At worst, it makes her come off as entirely forced and unconvincing, evidenced by Ready for It and End Game's unfortunate rapping, and LWYMMD, which is one of Swift's worst tracks.

Far better results come from Swift reconnecting with her old muse (love) and adapting it to her new sound. Gorgeous has music that perfectly matches its playful lyrics, Delicate carefully navigates that introductory part of a relationship with a fantastic chorus, and Call it What You Want finds Taylor finding that confidence and honesty that made her so likeable on 1989.

It's a mixed bag, as a pop album with 15 tracks is inevitably going to be, but reputation isn't too bogged down by its worst moments (and those moments are pretty damned bad). And maybe after getting all of this out of her system, Swift will be ready to take on the world again.
TesseracT Polaris
In Polaris, there are lovely atmospherics, soaring vocals from Dan, and yes, many djents. But where, exactly, are the songs?
The Beach Boys Surf's Up
The Breeders All Nerve
The Frames Another Love Song
The Frames Dance The Devil...
The Halo Effect Days of the Lost
A serviceable and well performed melodeath album. It's mainly gonna be for DT/IF die hards as its primary draw is hearing Jesper Stromblad playing melodeath and working with Mikael Stanne and past IF members again. It doesn't stick with you, but it's a good listen.
The Twilight Sad Live at Paisley Abbey
The Twilight Sad put on a great performance as always, but the orchestra is criminally
underutilized here, only actually appearing on 3 songs (The Wrong Car, The Room, Cold Days from
the Birdhouse). Naturally, those tracks are the best ones, and the power of the band and orchestra
combined is impressive.

The other tracks are stripped down arrangements performed ably and emotively. Other than that,
however, they don't offer much that the studio versions can't give you. It's nice to have a
Twilight Sad live album, especially a free one, but for the most part, I'd just stick with the
studio albums.
Upon Stone Dead Mother Moon
A solid release from a promising band that's let down by an unfortunate mix, kind of unmemorable songwriting and a level of hype no one could really live up to.
Weezer Maladroit
Weezer The Black Album
Wintersun The Forest Seasons
I mean, there are some really nice moments on almost all of these songs. Eternal Darkness is enjoyably intense, and the melodies and variety of Loneliness is quite welcome at the end of the record. But holy shit, absolutely NONE of them needed to be over 10 minutes, let alone threatening to hit the 15 minute mark like a couple of them do. Awaken from the Dark Slumber is a mess of repetition, and easily the album's low point. The Forest That Weeps isn't much better, but it has much more memorable moments. (The chorus is easily the best one on the album, even when they nearly run it into the ground.) So basically, as far as songwriting goes, it's split down the middle in terms of quality.

Production wise, it ain't great. It is absolutely clear that Jari is far more interested in keyboards and orchestrations than guitars. Those are tastefully done, and fill out the mix pretty well. But when they're not there? Yikes. Jari has said he doesn't like mids in metal guitars, and as such, the guitars are an indistinguishable, amorphous blob most of the time. So during the times when the guitars are the focus, the mix is absolutely dreadful.

But in the end, it seems like the main goal of this album was to be a perk so Jari can get his studio, so mission accomplished, I guess. I mean, it's not a *bad* record. There are some highlights that make it good. But it's not anything more than good.

2.5 average
AJJ The Bible 2
OK, first, the elephant in the room: the name change shouldn't be a big deal. If they're not
comfortable with what it could represent, then who are we to piss and moan about it?

That said, it doesn't help their case that the first record to bear the new name is the most
bizarrely neutered album AJJ have come up with. The songs just aren't as memorable this time
around, and Sean Bonnette's once hilariously pointed lyricism has, for the most part, become
rather anonymous. No More Shame and Small Red Boy are definite exceptions, but they're also very
frustrating, as they show what the album could have been.

Basically, this album is what everyone said Christmas Island was. But while Christmas Island was a
bold move in a new territory, The Bible 2 goes a bit too far, and strips away a lot of what we
loved about AJJ in the first place.
Batushka Raskol
Hospodi saw Bart trying REALLY hard to be Batushka. Now he's gotten that down, but the riffs and memorability aren't there. I mean Irmos I was memorable in that it followed a LOT of the same beats that Yekteniya I did. In and of itself, Raskol isn't *bad* but if I wanted to listen to Litourgiya again I'd just do that.
Batushka Царю Небесный
It's still Batushka cosplay, but it's at least decent Batushka cosplay.
Beady Eye BE
Blind Guardian Legacy Of The Dark Lands
Blue October Any Man in America
Coldplay Mylo Xyloto
Father John Misty Pure Comedy
Has some great moments for sure, but man, this album has aged like milk.
Foo Fighters Your Favorite Toy
Gatecreeper Dark Superstition
Greta Van Fleet Anthem of the Peaceful Army
They have potential for sure, they just need to not be Led Zeppelin. I mean seriously, that one Mountains song is Traveling Riverside Blues and Lover Leaver (Taker Believer) is straight up Whole Lotta Love like are you fucking kidding me

And if I hear one more person say "rock is alive" or "better than 90% of music or rock music these days" in reference to this band I am going to take a tub of bleach and chug it so fucking fast that frat bros across the nation will hail me as their god
Jeremiah Sand Lift It Down
[while sobbing] I'll blow you, man! I'll suck your fucking dick! Is that what you want? Please! Please! Please talk to me.
Jesu/Sun Kil Moon Jesu/Sun Kil Moon
Kanye West The Life of Pablo
The Life of Pablo is Kanye West's Be Here Now. His Born This Way.

Or, in layman's terms, the moment when the music he makes finally collapses under the sheer weight
of his ambitions and overconfidence in himself.
Liam Gallagher Why Me? Why Not.
So, I've heard all of this Liam Gallagher album and...well...where even IS Liam? The guy who compares his brother to a potato and calls himself a zen motherfucker because he thinks staring out the window is pure mind control. Where is that guy? Because he ain't here. Really, if it wasn't for his voice, this would just be a set of completely faceless rock tunes. Hell, it's almost that even with his voice.
Liturgy The Ark Work
Maroon 5 Red Pill Blues
Man, I was expecting a complete shitshow, but instead I got an album that is just wholly uninteresting. This is the closest they've come to their early sound since Hands All Over, but the songs are too homogeneous to really top any of their early work. And when they do stand out, it's not for good reasons. (In what universe do the lyrics to Whiskey make any sense??) Adam Levine's voice is a pleasure to listen to, but as the album goes on, he's kinda singing the same melody lines over the same electronic beats with one little looped guitar lick as if to try to say "Hey! We're still that band!"

And then comes Closure, where they actually are that band. This incredibly enjoyable and fun 12 minute jam session (with some excellent sax playing) is basically what the .5 in the score is for. Listen to that song, and skip everything else.
Mechina Venator
Megadeth Megadeth
Muse The 2nd Law
Our Lady Peace Gravity
Our Lady Peace Curve
Queensryche Q2K
Queensryche Operation: Mindcrime II
Sanguisugabogg Tortured Whole
Literally does what it says on the tin, and you can't really fault it for that. Still, this just isn't doing anything for me.
Slayer God Hates Us All
Sun Kil Moon I Also Want to Die in New Orleans
The 1975 A Brief Inquiry into Online Relationships
This album tries SO HARD to be this grand, sweeping statement on modern society. And then loses the plot musically and lyrically after like track 10 or so. Love it if We Made It is catchy as all hell despite the awful lyrics, and the closing track is quite memorable too. Beyond that? This is probably the most self-important album of 2018.
The Beach Boys Carl and the Passions
The Beach Boys M.I.U. Album
The Smashing Pumpkins Aghori Mhori Mei
The Who Who
U2 Songs of Experience
Weezer The Red Album

2.0 poor
All That Remains The Order of Things
*chug chug chug* baby dont leeeeeeeaaaavvveeeeee *chug chug chug* FUCKING KILL EVERYONE INSIDE
*chug chug chug* babe i really meeeeeaaaan all of these generic sentiments i promise you girl
*chug chug chug* ALL THAT REMAINS HATERS ARE ELITIST MOUTHBREATHERS *chug chug chug*
giiiiiiiiiirrrrrrrrrrrllllllllll dont leeeeeaaaaaaave *solo* *breakdown* this is the heavily
processed final choruuuuuusssssss *chug chug chug* Repeat for another eleven songs.
Amon Amarth The Great Heathen Army
Breaking Benjamin Ember
The Dark of You is a frustrating song. It's not excellent, really it's not even great. It's a good song that shows that Breaking Benjamin have the ability, nascent though it is, to try something different. To possibly break out of their trademark sound that had already begun to grow stale on Dear Agony nearly a decade ago.

But they just don't. Not when the choruses are barely distinguishable from BB choruses on past albums (or even other songs on this album). Not when the guitar riffs on their so-called "heavier" album are buried in the mix (riffs that are almost the same as the ones on Dear Agony, no less). Not even when Ben's repeated, toneless screams of "RUN! RUN! RUN!" on Red Cold River border on self-parody. Not...ever, honestly.

If you love the band unconditionally, you'll love this. If you're still waiting on them to progress in any way whatsoever, it might be time to put down your old burned CDr copy of Phobia and leave the hall. Or maybe that's just me.
Bring Me The Horizon That's the Spirit
WE DON'T HAVE THE JUNZ ANYMORE AND WE WROTE SONGS THAT SOUND LIKE EVERYONE ELSE SO PLEASE LET US
ON RADIO PRETTY PLEASE WE'LL BE YOUR BESTEST FRIENDS
Coldplay Music of the Spheres
Coldplay has always seemed to want to be universal, but at this point, they've just crossed the line from universal to anonymous.

I mean, Mylo Xyloto had the same problem but shit at least that one had some good songs and some distinct Coldplay-isms to it. The music on this one is basically what people who hate pop music think all pop music sounds like. It's not pretty. Coloratura is too little too late.

And yeah, the lyrics flop hard too. Again, going for big, universal sentiments. But all I can really glean from it message-wise is "we're humans and we do stuff, by golly!" Like seriously, who is this for?
Coldplay Moon Music
Filter The Sun Comes Out Tonight
After 2010's awesome The Trouble with Angels, I had some high hopes for this album. Unfortunately, what I got in return was probably Filter's most half-assed album. It's one thing to say "the songs all sound the same," but it's another thing entirely when the songs ACTUALLY sound the same. The rockers on the album are a real one trick pony. The choruses are interchangeable, with the same formula: Fast moving Drop C barred power chords while Richard Patrick screams the same high A# note while often descending down to a G. After I picked out the formula, the album got old fast. The softer songs were decent, with Surprise and the electronically-leaning title track being highlights, but I was disappointed at how blatantly Richard Patrick was ripping off of himself. Granted, The Inevitable Relapse off the last album did that as well, but at least the unique use of autotune and Patrick's renewed energy made that song enjoyable. All in all, I thought that very little effort was put into this album. For those wanting to hear this, I would recommend The Trouble with Angels instead. Or Title of Record, if you haven't heard that.
Geoff Tate Operation: Mindcrime III
Green Day Father of All Motherfuckers
Greta Van Fleet The Battle at Garden's Gate
Good news, they don't sound dead up like Led Zeppelin anymore. Bad news is that they are still so far submerged in 60's/70's classic rock tropes that they just don't have their own identity. Having more ballads and longer songs doesn't really cover this up, either, especially when your singer still belts at practically the same volume regardless of what kind of song it is.

But they're not ripping off Led Zeppelin anymore!
In Flames Foregone
When I was a wee lad, I ordered a pack of Yu-Gi-Oh cards on eBay because the wording made it seem like you were guaranteed a really rare card and when it finally came in the mail it was a bunch of garbage commons. The fact that listening to this album made me recall this very specific memory should say enough about what you're gonna get vs. what the singles and hype tried to sell you on.
Kanye West ye
Kanye West Jesus Is King
Kanye West Donda
Yeah this is the textbook definition of quantity over quality. Honestly, the stretch of tracks from Jesus Lord through No Child Left Behind is the best stuff Ye's put out in a while. But fuck me, it is not worth slogging through the rest to get there. I mean, it's not bad but the first *fourteen* tracks on this thing could easily be considered filler. The features carry the album on these tracks.

And then there's the Pt. 2's at the end, which add nothing to the originals or the album as a whole, and really aren't worth checking out. Jail Pt. 2 is especially awful with pointless Marilyn Manson vocals and DaBaby's woe-is-me bullshit verse.

This album demands nearly 110 minutes of your time and only ~30 of those are truly quality. Definitely not worth the hype.
KK's Priest Sermons Of The Sinner
Is heavy metal supposed to be this boring?
Lady Gaga Born This Way
Liturgy Aesthethica
You know, Aesthethica is actually the perfect name for this album, because that's what this album and this band are about. Aesthetics. Style above all, quality of music be damned.
Mark Kozelek and Petra Haden Joey Always Smiled
Look, Mark, I get that you're not trying for perfection anymore, but can you at least try...at ALL? I mean jesus christ you're literally rehashing stories from Benji and openly admitting it in your songs how dumb do you think we are?
Megadeth Dystopia
Metallica Reload
Mumford and Sons Wilder Mind
On Wilder Mind, Mumford & Sons' reckless experimentation ultimately gets the better of them, and leads to the songs being massively overstuffed with material. Whether it's the Merzbowian harsh noise that overtakes Tompkins Square Park, the Gregorian chants in Broad-Shouldered Beasts, or the self-described "audio Pagan ritual" that is Snake Eyes, the album is just too absorbed in itself to forge any kind of meaningful connection. "I don't even know if I believe/Everything you're trying to say to me," Marcus Mumford screams, in an ear-piercing screech high-pitched enough to break glass. And in that screech, he sums up my thoughts on Wilder Mind succinctly.
Our Lady Peace Healthy In Paranoid Times
Prophets of Rage The Party's Over
This sounds so stale and polished that barely any rage can be found here. Prophets of Mild Irritation is more like it.
Queensryche Frequency Unknown (Tate's Queensryche)
Say Anything Anarchy, My Dear
Six Feet Under True Carnage
Snakes
Sun Kil Moon Universal Themes
There are over 6500 words on this album, and yet, through it all, Mark Kozelek is saying absolutely nothing.
The Beach Boys 15 Big Ones
The Beach Boys The Beach Boys
The Chainsmokers Memories...Do Not Open
The Chainsmokers are kind of like saltine crackers. They're just so bland and uninteresting on the whole that they just don't inspire any strong feelings. I can't like them, nor can I despise them. I don't really feel anything towards their music. They're kind of just there.

That said, they get docked a half point for associating with Florida Georgia Line.

1.5 very poor
Danzig Danzig Sings Elvis
Dream Theater The Astonishing
Look, if you're going to make a cheesy concept album, it has to be FUN. You have to be in on its cheesiness and make it fun. This album takes itself WAY too seriously to be fun, and instead we get a two hour slog through Disney musical piano ballads and a story that falls apart halfway through. For the love of god, AVOID.
Fuel Angels and Devils
Kerry King From Hell I Rise
Sorry y'all, this one sucks. Nameless, formless, pseudo hard-ass thrash without a single memorable moment, and it shows Kerry King hasn't had anything left in the tank since 2009. Hard pass.
Lou Reed and Metallica Lulu
Megadeth Super Collider
Nickelback Dark Horse
Panic! at the Disco Viva Las Vengeance
This album is an iceberg of bad. It starts with the anonymous, uninspired instrumental performances and Brendan's shrill, strained high notes. You dive deeper and find the bizarre melodic choices and cringeworthy lyrics, finally hitting rock bottom with the sheer ugliness of Local God and Something About Maggie. Genuinely terrible album.
Queensryche Dedicated To Chaos
Queensryche Frequency Unknown (Deluxe Edition)
When your new mix of In the Hands of God actually knocks the vocal track OFF TIME, then you know you fucked up.
Radiohead The Best Of
Six Feet Under Nightmares of the Decomposed
If you brought Carol Channing back from the dead and told her to talk over the most bog-standard, generic death metal songs in existence, you'd get this album.

Actually, you know what, I'm sorry. Carol Channing doesn't deserve this.
Sum 41 Screaming Bloody Murder
We're dark and brooding! Now we're catchy and fun! Oh, now we're dark and thrashy this time!
Whoops, too thrashy, let's do a power ballad. Wait, we're not dark and brooding enough! THREE PART
DARK SUITE. OK that was too much, soft piano ballad. WAIT WHY ARE WE BALLADING WE'RE DARK AND
BROODING GODDAMNIT

What does this album want to be and why am I even listening to this

It's fucking 2am
Taylor Swift The Tortured Poets Department
You know that feeling you get when you watch someone you really respected show their ugly side and make a complete ass of themselves to the point where you're questioning every past interaction you've ever had with them? Yeah.
The Beach Boys Keepin' the Summer Alive
The Beach Boys Still Cruisin'
The Beach Boys L.A. (Light Album)
The Faceless Autotheism
Threatin Breaking the World
Hey Threatin, you know you don't have to belt literally every song at the same volume, right? I think Fade into Never actually gave me a headache.
Weezer Raditude

1.0 awful
Buckcherry Fuck
Drake Dark Lane Demo Tapes
A world where Drake is not relevant at all is a world I would want to live in.
Falling in Reverse Popular Monster
ronnie badke lmao got em
Forest Of Harambe Under The Sign Of Harambe
Geoff Tate Kings & Thieves
Katy Perry 143
Should've kept it at a 1.1.
Korn The Path of Totality
Kurt Cobain Montage of Heck: The Home Recordings
Q: If the corpse is decomposed by this point, can you still milk it for all it's worth?
A: Of fucking course you can!
Linkin Park From Zero
Look, I'm normally pretty charitable on reunion/comeback records because oftentimes, they really do have something to say. But jesus fucking CHRIST, man.
Nitro O.F.R.
Nitro's debut album does have the potential to be fun, however it is constI CANT FUCKING DO THIS

KILL ME NOW
FUCKING DO IT GODDAMNIT

IT KEEPS GOING IT NEVER ENDS AND HERE I AM JUST SITTING AND LISTENING
I AM HUMAN G A R B A G E

be my mercy angel
deliver me from this

THE SCRE E E E E E E E E C HIN G n ev e r endS WHOCALLSTHISSINGING
Say Anything ...Is Sleazy
Say Anything The Noise of Say Anything's Room Without
Six Feet Under Graveyard Classics IV: The Number Of The Priest
Taylor Swift The Life of a Showgirl
Father Figure and Actually Romantic have to be some of the most bitter, mean-spirited, vindictive songs I've ever heard. The rest is either incoherent, self-aggrandizing or completely uninteresting. Also exhausting. The whole thing is fucking exhausting. The last album was too. I'm tired.
The Beach Boys Summer in Paradise
Tom MacDonald Deathreats
Tom MacDonald Ghoststories
Trapt Shadow Work
It's a fucking Trapt album in 2020 what other score could it possibly get?

(inb4 0.5)
Waking The Cadaver Perverse Recollections Of A Necromangler
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