CalculatingInfinity
User

Soundoffs 10
News Articles 2
Band Edits + Tags 10
Album Edits 49

Album Ratings 571
Objectivity 66%

Last Active 04-16-20 11:22 pm
Joined 12-21-13

Review Comments 9,857

 Lists
07.08.17 A Celebration of Musical Shite06.06.17 Quest to 500 Ratings
12.21.16 A Very Festive and Posi 3rd Sputversary10.10.16 Top 10 Meshuggah Songs
08.17.16 Anyone Here Have 100% Orange Juice/Have07.11.16 A Guide to Buying Japanese Music Overse
08.24.15 Best Sputnik Quotes 06.07.15 Albums I Bought So Far This Year
05.06.15 My 5's Ranked04.30.15 Selling SGM's Of Natural History
12.13.14 1 Year On Sput!11.16.14 Albums I Own
08.14.14 I'm Going To Uni!!!!!! 04.28.14 Time To Kick Some Exam Arse :]
01.26.14 My Top 20 Dillinger Escape Plan Songs12.21.13 Good Day Everyone

Best Sputnik Quotes

Oh hai everybody, I don't know if someone's done this before however after talking to a few people I feel like this needs to be done. Whether the quote is funny, shows extreme stupidity, iconic, or a number of the three all contributions are welcome. If you're contributing please give the source of the quote if possible, and album to add to the list with it if it's from a list or personal convo. Quote away! Also thanks to Jasdevi for giving me a few sources.
1One OK Rock
35xxxv


"I personnally enjoyed listening to this album and even downloaded it!" - Some idiot, indulging in an awful rant. http://www.sputnikmusic.com/album.php?reviewid=66074&page=2#comments
2Periphery
Periphery II: This Time It's Personal


"and while he hits the notez, the notes themselves are gay" - KILL regarding Spencer, and you can take pretty much any part of this review to the bank: http://38.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m6m38tGS051qd37u4o1_r1_1280.png
3Ween
Chocolate and Cheese


"Yeah, but you're damaging Ween's average in the process." - Arse being trolled and Jac fulling the fire with "I have listened to it there was that 1 riff I was like "man that deserves a 1 by itself" but I persevered and came to the conclusion this is objectively the worst album ever trust me I am true Ween elite": http://www.sputnikmusic.com/album.php?reviewid=1350&page=3#comments
4Opeth
My Arms, Your Hearse


"I'm not really into pop music (I'm an Opeth fan actually)" - Onirium confessing his love for Opeth in the most inept way possible: http://moaropeth.tumblr.com/image/84074532418
5Black Tongue
Born Hanged


"I'm a sucker for objectivity" - Ins relieving his reasoning behind his modus operandi of rating shite albums: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/album.php?reviewid=62255&page=7#comments (Thank you Jac)
6Toshimaru Nakamura
No-Input Mixing Board #3


"Interesting, and yeah i mean music with the use of melodic hooks and such, not saying those genres have no melody. A lot of metal is melodic though, do you care for prog or melodeath at all? also what is onkyo?" - Ins delievering a question which has an obvious answer and trying to answer the true meaning of life: What is Onkyo? In Nimb's shoutbox
7Opeth
Blackwater Park


"The capacity of human intelligence seems to limit the capabilities to expand upon any possible creative aptitudes. Indeed, if one cannot even notice the facets that the ingenuities around him are comprised of, how can he be expected to fashion a beast of his own? This inveterate sense of constraint is a great blow to the veracity of mankind’s abilities. It restrains us and holds our minds to the ground below, averting any possibility of rising above ourselves to something greater; something not fathomed by the conventional mind. This concept of seeking to go beyond one’s self, known as “transcendence”, is essentially a gateway to unlocking pieces of ourselves that can lead to some of the most elaborate and significant creations of our world. For many, this quest to transcend and form creations that were once considered unthinkable and overwhelming consumes life. Certainly it is rare to find such people, but when they are found, creative barriers are destroyed." - We all know this.
8Opeth
Deliverance


"I thought Opeth was metal... I guess I was wrong..." - Deththrasher having his manperiod complaining about Opeth not being heavy before it was a thing: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/42483/Opeth-Damnation/
9Jimmy Eat World
Futures


"how mad r u tho for real?" - Futures' main tool of annoyance back when he was troll mode 9000.
10Dir En Grey
Arche


"Diru an gurei niu arubum, at last." - Some fucking weeb showing why this band's general fanbase is the worst: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/65311/Dir-En-Grey-Arche/
11Origin
Omnipresent


"tremolo picked pinch harmonics." - Guitar lessons 101 with Insurrection: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/album.php?reviewid=63086&page=2#comments
12Gorguts
Obscura


"Thanks for your response. I can see now you're just a troll.

There is no explanation why anyone would waste their time listening to something like this https://alcohol.bandcamp.com/album/no-input-mixing-boardhis

wow random ass computer sounds so not vanilla you showed me. Artery Eruption wasn't even wacky either, you just like obscure shit like a hipster." - yuneek struggling to comprehend someone's taste, cute: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/album.php?reviewid=2225&page=81#comments
13Ludwig van Beethoven
Symphony No. 5 in C minor, Op. 67


"Had an eye fillet steak last night it was simply pulchritudinous" - Jac carrying out is usual favorite past time (i.e. Taking the piss out of Ins' reviews): http://www.sputnikmusic.com/album.php?reviewid=65977&page=2#comments
14Carnifex
Die Without Hope


"Like others have said, if the band that released this album wasn't Carnifex, elitist nerds would be eating this up." - Back when Betray was being a butthurt bitch instead of the cool guy he is now (please come back on Plug soon): http://www.sputnikmusic.com/soundoff.php?albumid=149314
15L'arc-en-Ciel
Ark


"Ahh yes. Good ol' L'arc en Ciel. A band that can guys can vibe too, and girls can cream to, in peace." - Discovolante delievering possibly the most cringeworthy first sentence to a review ever: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/48044/Larc-en-Ciel-Ark/
16Swans
Soundtracks for the Blind


"listening to this album is so epic it makes me feel like im doing something completley mind blowing whenever i listen to it

like, if i was taking a shit with this playing in the background, then it would make it feel like the fate of the human race depended on the shit

this album is so cool" - Supercoolguy64 apparently foaming at the mouth about Swans: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/album.php?reviewid=26462&page=38#comments
17Sufjan Stevens
Carrie and Lowell


"I'd say the same about u FlagBurner but you actually have 2 very distinguishable types of comments

the ones in the morning when ur grumpy and sober and butthurt at me 24/7

and the ones in the evening when youre shitfaced like always and talking about how much you want to make out with sufjan until you get really worked up by my comments about him and then turn into raging alcoholic mode and quit the site for a night " - Potsy delievering hard truths: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/album.php?reviewid=66560&page=46#comments
18The Wrens
Secaucus


"i like the part in luxury when the song just ends abruptly because its a fucking shitty song” - Potsy delievering hard truths [2]: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/67730/The-Wrens-Secaucus/
19Pedestrian Deposit
Fatale


“I only 5/5 albums I can cry-wank to, only then I can safely assure that the album has left an impact on me, and that I've left my mark on it" - LivingThrowaway confessing his need to leave his cum on CD's: No source given
20The National
Boxer


"Keep stroking. Livingthrowaway's penis is basically the definition of a grower. It doesn't quite clock at first and then BANG and you are smacked in the eye." - LivingThrowaway the world's first insta-erect penis: no source but it's some The national - http://www.sputnikmusic.com/album.php?reviewid=12078&page=107#comments
21Waking the Cadaver
Beyond Cops, Beyond God


"Breakdowns from the inferno form the most intense hellish gorepunch to the face that you will ever eperience, like chainsaws to the abdomen, erotically. This is guttural slamming brutal death metal. If you could rate the goretuity of BEYOND COPS, BEYOND GODS on a scale of 1-5 I'd rate it a 69 because it's perversely brutal, like that guy from Silence Of The Lambs no homo" - Mappy's finest moment: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/39155/Waking-the-Cadaver-Beyond-Cops-Beyond-God/
22Annotations Of An Autopsy
Dark Days


"I'm not sure what the vocalist is saying but I assume the lyrics are about the affordability of big macs or something about sluts" - Dan FUCKING Gibbes in this satirical masterpiece http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/44622/Annotations-Of-An-Autopsy-Dark-Days/
23Protest the Hero
Volition


"One of the birds that is looking at her also appears to be raping her. Since the bird's penis isn't shown, though, this can't be said for certain. The bird could simply be looking at the woman very closely. It could even be a female bird, and since female birds don't have penises, that renders the possibility of rape very slim- unless the female bird tied a stick or a dildo or a banana to its crotch. However, since birds don't have hands, the chances of this are again very slim." - The most objective review of all time: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/59704/Protest-the-Hero-Volition/
24The Who
Who's Next


"dudes im goin to bed hard but remember this

rock will never die" - KILL continuing to be an inspiration to us all: No source given
25Mastodon
Blood Mountain


"YES A MASTODON GUITAR SOLO" - progmaster proudly proclaiming that he enjoys listening to dull solos: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/32618/Mastodon-Blood-Mountain/
26Between the Buried and Me
Alaska


"I really depended in this band for their progressive death metal talents."
"NOTE: I have no care for the audience of my review. No, I'm not going to improve. No, I am not a die hard fan of this band either. Criticism will not be read."
"Generic commenter: Aweful review, Aweful album. Go get a life!!!"
- mopheadovmetal delievering a pointless train wreck of a review: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/43735/Between-the-Buried-and-Me-Alaska/#comments
27CHVRCHES
The Bones of What You Believe


"nothing quite like putting this on and having a decent cry" - Arcade telling us a bit too much about his past times: http://i.imgur.com/oTJjaT2.jpg
28Teitanblood
Death


"The cancer that ravages the bodies of the weak from the inside. The sheets in the hospitals that can’t wash out the death of the thousand hosts they’ve harnessed. The ruination of nations. The sepulchral monuments to which the bodies lay buried. The rituals of sacrifice. The cults of lives stolen. The genocides of peoples. The dolmens of the ancient, unheard of and enigmatic lost peoples who had succumbed to life’s inevitability before our time. The confrontation of everything that has and will be drawn to an end. The breath of life given to dead bones--the learnings from those passed and the monolith of their impression. The silence, the cacophony, the burial, the pyramids, the temples, the sky and watered earth, the petrichor that rises from old graves. The nails and hair that grow long after the flesh has decayed." - Snox providing hyperbole to the extreme: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/62560/Teitanblood-Death/
29Fallujah
The Flesh Prevails


"absolute overproduced dweedle shite" - Pleb displaying his superior knowledge while wearing Sennheiser headphones: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/soundoff.php?albumid=164989
30Bullet for My Valentine
Venom


"Don't flatter yourself. The day I let an elitist brony cunt get under my skin is the day Skele replaces MX as the admin of Sputnik" - Insurrection, being terrible at predicting the future: No source given
31Deftones
Around the Fur


"Please don't call deftones Nu-metal. There is nothing metal about them. I count the minutes until Keyser Funk is ranting about them." - Some loser: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/album.php?reviewid=53428&page=4#comments
32Opeth
Blackwater Park


"A 5 for opeths blackwater park makes me think I'm half or more a decade older than you. The use of insults in a conversation als indicates a sign of weakness, a sign of incertainty about one's own argumentation. Scientifically proven." - bakkermaarten007 pulling out the age card and showing his outstanding maturity: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/album.php?reviewid=53428&page=9#comments
33Geoff Tate
Kings & Thieves


"In the end, you have to laugh at Kings and Thieves, or you'd cry and projectile vomit simultaneously." - Benjamin Carter from his review of Geoff Tate's "King's and Thieves", giving doctors around the world symptoms of listening to Geoff's musical equlivant of a mid life crysis: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/53169/Geoff-Tate-Kings--Thieves/
34Limp Bizkit
Chocolate Starfish and the Hot Dog...


Just read the whole review, it's gold: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/62677/Limp-Bizkit-Chocolate-Starfish-and-the-Hot-Dog.../
35Adramelech
The Fall


"sometimes i listen to adramelech and pretend im a cool demon and do evil spells on my neighbours dog but they called the police." - ffs sharing his wonderful fantasies: http://moaropeth.tumblr.com/image/61202233968
36Failure
Fantastic Planet


Potsy: "are you trans"

Parallels: "Recent Tracks:

Alice in Chains Nutshell
Against Me! Transgender Dysphoria Blues
Joy Division A Means to an End
Placebo Drag
LCD Soundsystem Dance Yrself Clean
Nine Inch Nails The Becoming
Hole Asking For It
Against Me! Paralytic States
Against Me! Fuckmylife666
Crystal Castles Vietnam"

Amazing: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/album.php?reviewid=43706&page=6#comments
37Failure
Fantastic Planet


Potsy: "ur cock is the softest"

Parallels: "you don't know how right you are"

http://www.sputnikmusic.com/album.php?reviewid=43706&page=5#comments
38Anacrusis
Manic Impressions


evilford: "riffs harder than ur mom"

CalculatingInfinity: "My mom doesn't riff so that isn't saying much"

http://www.sputnikmusic.com/album.php?reviewid=13503&page=25#lastpost
39Depravity
Silence of the Centuries


"Everyone who isn't stupid as hell knows Finnish death metal is the best death metal" - ffs displaying a terrible bias: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/57562/Depravity-Silence-of-the-Centuries/
40Between the Buried and Me
Colors


"Here's a list of artists that make me feel smart/intelligent...

Feel free to share yours...Just FYI, I'm not claiming that my music taste is superior than anybody's here. I'll just like to know if you guys feel enlightened when you hear a certain artist or genre." - Royl123 with one of the dumbest musings ever: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/list.php?listid=160866&memberid=1044748
41N.W.A.
Straight Outta Compton


"Millions upon millions more care about, weezer over nwa even with this overhyped movie" - Tresm87 being a fucking moron: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/album.php?reviewid=68184&page=3#comments
42Eisley
Room Noises


"It is a Christianality theme, it is fictional, but no religion in the music, it is Okay, it is funny, do you need some coffee from a Christian coffee shop?" - punkgeekalt creating a glorious train wreck of a review: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/14542/Eisley-Room-Noises/
43Bring Me the Horizon
Count Your Blessings


"yeah my family members sit me down all the time and make me listen to ENTIRE BRING ME THE HORIZON ALBUMS" Lord Channing owning mug who 1'ed BMTH's discography and didn't expect to get banned (just read the link): http://moaropeth.tumblr.com/image/15021492789
44Tankard
Beast of Bourbon


ffs: "please unban me. im drunk"

chan: "what did you get banned for"

ffs: "probably for saying faggot or ****** or something idk

ffs: lol n*gger is censored are we 12 years old

http://moaropeth.tumblr.com/image/15683829782
45Pure
Fetor


"power electronics, is that like a drill?" - lloyd the GOAT: Unfortunately said on Plug so not recorded
46Agony (CAN)
Apocalyptic Dawning


Whole thing I guess, it's a KILL review what do yiou want? http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/51183/Agony-CAN-Apocalyptic-Dawning/
47Brand New
The Devil and God Are Raging Inside Me


" terrible albums, overrated too. This site makes me laugh sometimes, it seems like you guys just wanna make yourselves look good by picking out this kind of experimental garbage just to confuse people into thinking "why don't I like this?" Well, you don't like it because it's crap. Pure and simple." - YouOweYourSoul thinking he's king shit on shit mountain, being a 'grand' bullshit detector: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/blog/2013/12/18/staff%E2%80%99s-top-50-albums-of-2013-10-%E2%80%93-1/
48Empire! Empire! (I Was a Lonely Estate)
What It Takes to Move Forward


""LOL, you guys are calling me an idiot for criticising a trite list like this? Go fuck yourselves, you pathetic swine. Trebor, you've pissed me off enough over my stay on this site, you can go and listen to some more of your emo shit, and suck on your daddy's limp dick some more, you stupid fucking inept bastard. You're one of the biggest pricks I've ever encountered (and I haven't even seen you before), in fact, this whole fucking site is full of dick less fairies like you. You are nothing but a bunch of emo, negative and dick less bitches on this site. You all make fun of me for sharing my opinion, yet you guys can't even formulate your own favourites of the year. So, instead, you just jump on the bandwagon with all of these lame choices? You make me sick, this whole fucking site makes me sick and I hope you all burn in hell for being the worthless fucking leeches that you are." - Some knob (maybe same as above) who is more 'edge' then Hopsin's musings on Fly: Refer to above
49Megadeth
Peace Sells... but Who's Buying?


"1986 was the best year ever made" - sonic in his trve review of peace sells, stating that making years is possible: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/38301/Megadeth-Peace-Sells...-but-Whos-Buying/
50Megadeth
So Far, So Good... So What!


"megadeth are a band most known for their thrash balls and whiny vocals and the man himself, megadave" - KILL being the authority on Thrash as usual: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/50803/Megadeth-So-Far-So-Good...-So-What%21/
51Scale the Summit
The Collective


"This is the worst top 50 in the history of top 50 lists BY FAR. How can you compare 100 different genres between them and then conclude which is the best album from which genre? Someone explain to me how you compare gorguts to julia holter to scale the summit to whatever? There are comparable genres and genres which have nothing in common. In the case of the latter it is stupid and unprofessional to make a list since there is no common ground between the musical directions. Forget this top 50. Go to www.metalhammer.co.uk and check out THE REAL DEAL of this year's top 50 albums". - The same prat as on 48 and 47, using Metal Hammer as a credible source (lol): Refer to 47
52Melvins
Bullhead


Insurrection: "im guessing this is where i should start with melvins? god the artwork is shit tho"

KILL: "it's no giant P with a circle around it agreed lol"

http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/52343/Melvins-Bullhead/
53Carnivore
Retaliation


"So yea this rules. I recommend this to people with balls, people who have never heard of Animal Collective, people who wank while pissing, basically real men. This is probably the best crossover thrash album ever made. If you havent heard this you are gay." - Manliest quote ever by KILL: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/47481/Carnivore-Retaliation/
54Meat Puppets
Up on the Sun


"The album just makes me really happy as ***, like i almost just have to start dancing. Can you imagine driving down a country lane with the roof down smoking gonks listening to maidens milk? I have dreamt about this many times." - KILL's epic Meat Puppets review, 'nuff said: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/47362/Meat-Puppets-Up-on-the-Sun/
55Moss
Cthonic Rites


"That is what Moss is: green, nonvascular plants, that slay for days. Moss is plants with hammers, crushing your face. Moss is me kicking you in the face. Moss is everybody in the world kicking you in the face so you die, then resurrecting you, then kicking you in the face another six billion times. Moss is the moon falling on your face. Moss is like that one time at school when this girl hit this other girl in the face with a bat. Moss is like that one other time at school when that girl punched this other girl in the face and broke her nose. The Big Bang was caused by Moss. This one time, this girl I know was acting up, so I dropped a semi-trailer on her face. Anyone remember the dinosaurs? Pretty sure Cthonic Rites totally fucked up their shit." - rasputin giving us a 100% factually accerate history lesson: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/28105/Moss-Cthonic-Rites/
56Van Halen
1984


"1984 helped them create an ever larger fan-base. It has circumstances that the album was written in." - Blakethemusicman coming to the realization that an album is written under given circumstances: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/65770/Van-Halen-1984
57Red Hot Chili Peppers
Blood Sugar Sex Magik


"Energy, testosterone, and emotion is put in from all four members" - Blakethemusicman discussing RHCP's hormone:. http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/65736/Red-Hot-Chili-Peppers-Blood-Sugar-Sex-Magik/
58Meat Puppets
Meat Puppets II


"Evoking images of the desert around the band’s hometown Phoenix, the instrumental “Aurora Borealis”, “We’re Here” and “Plateau”s shimmering outro are representative of the album as a whole; timeless passages of music imbued with a sense of fragility by the bands lackadaisical playing and Kirkwood’s languid, wavering vocals, which may initially take some getting used to for new listeners or those with DICKS IN THEIR EARS." - porch's review of Meat Puppets II: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/53728/Meat-Puppets-Meat-Puppets-II/
59Arghoslent
Incorrigible Bigotry


"If you read interviews with these guys, they're not even racist. They're not white supremacists. Their views really aren't all that deplorable." - Snox on arghoslent: Source not given
60Black Veil Brides
Set the World on Fire


"Power electronics? Well, I did make a dubstep song." - Snide pushing his project hard: No source given.
61Gackt
MOON


"This is like a less heavy Dir en Grey" - Another nugget of widsom from Pleb: Said on Plug so not recorded
62Ween
The Mollusk


"im the anti-troll, its my destiny to 'troll' s***ty troll users off this site and i have been fulfilling it for nearly a decade. when not 'trolling' you can find me being extremely opinionated about: all things ever. you are a pisces like my girlfriend but you are not a girl or my friend. perhaps a boyquaintance. pet peeves: when users make me feel bad for being mean to them by being really nice. damn you ars." - Potsy in Ars' shoutbox, when he's an Aqaurius: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/shoutbox.php?memberid=1034848
63Royal Blood
Royal Blood


"trying to pigeonhole everything into neat little genres is dumb af this conversation is a load of tedious pedantic idiotic shite" - Tommygun dropping truth bombs on the Royal Blood thread: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/album.php?reviewid=63908&page=15#comments
64Cradle of Filth
Midian


"damn hawks has been shootin kids n killin hoes since 2007" - alach

"the only hoes he's got is the one he waters his lawn with" - hep sawce. In fact EVERY quote on this list is great: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/list.php?listid=113063
65iNTRiKeT
The Woods


"michael again you should probably stop ass kissing and think of why you have an army of haters on this site cause seriously youre just [b]awful[/b]" - Ins calling out on bullshit: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/album.php?reviewid=53589&page=4#comments
66Rage Against the Machine
Rage Against the Machine


"Know that what you preach is not "Freedom", but tyranny. In the form of really bad nu-metal.

Sincerely,

A capitalist" - Well...speaks for itself: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/61404/Rage-Against-the-Machine-Rage-Against-the-Machine/
67Beyond Creation
The Aura


"worse than holes in socks" - Snox's summary for his Beyond Creation, a reminder of that legendary thread: Sadly has been deleted
68iNTRiKeT
The Woods


"Josh Frazer is a maniac, and by maniac I don't mean a virgin with his own music site" - Recs putting it all into perpective: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/53633/iNTRiKeT-The-Woods/
69Fallujah
Nomadic


"I actually read the review and it was good, so I shall not give a meaningless pos and rather a pos that has purpose because I read the review and deemed it good. Unlike some people who pos without any real meaning, because a pos means nothing if the person didn't even bother to read the review." - Snox philosophizes on the meaning of a pos

http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/56423/Fallujah-Nomadic/#comments
70Slint
Spiderland


"If you write a note before suiciding you don't want to die" -TenSecondsToThink delievering some of the most fucking stupid musings I've ever read: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/news/33636/Slint-guitarist-survives-suicide-attempt/
71Porcupine Tree
Deadwing


"I've always thought of psych as alt rock music that is pretty keyboard heavy and has a trippy atmosphere" - Mongi giving a silly generation of psych music http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/67570/Porcupine-Tree-Deadwing/
72Mastodon
Blood Mountain


all of http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/34784/Mastodon-Blood-Mountain/ - theacademy
73The Doors
The Doors


“Hang on,” you say, “you have a clear bias against psychedelic rock music!” I do indeed. This is because I like rock music. Thus, when I hear a genre of music dedicated to doing the complete opposite of what rock was originally about – rawness, rebellion, swiftness, excitement, activism – and especially when it is only a small step away from some of the worst bands of all time like Yes, Genesis, Kansas etc, I absolutely despise it. “You just hate psychedelic rock,” you say. Yes, I do. You simply cannot call yourself a rock n’ roll fan if you enjoy The Doors, Sgt. Pepper era Beatles, Iron Butterfly, Pink Floyd, etc."- hyperboleking being stupid, don't know what else to say tbh: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/12953/The-Doors-The-Doors/
74The Dillinger Escape Plan
One of Us Is the Killer


"this band is basically converge on cocaine+meth+steroids and a shitload proggier" - Ins stating truths: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/album.php?reviewid=56636&page=60#comments
75Earth
Earth 2


"Earth 2 is the sonic equivalent to mowing the lawn. That, in essence, is all this album is." - Some prat who pussied out and edited his whole review but said quote is before the edit: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/68210/Earth-Earth-2/
76HEALTH
Death Magic


"So what the hell is it with all those composers? I don't like bands who use external writers. Or does the site just label everyone involved as composer even though they were just engineers and stuff?"

"So it's totally ok how in the pop business songs get written even before someone knows who will perform it and then they throw it at rihanna or some other "musician"? I think a musician can only stand behind his music if he wrote it himself. It feels like stealing, only "legal". How can anyone sing the lyrics with the proper passion if he never gave a fuck about them? I don't like that and it's a reason for me to not like a "musician" if he doesn't write his own music." - LOLifant caring a bit too much about completely irrelevant shit: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/album.php?reviewid=68053&page=3#comments
77HEALTH
Death Magic


"I know that compared to the death black goth metal of doom and evil darkness bands sputnik elitists listen to the stuff I've rated so far is pretty mainstream. But if thought outside of sputnik, then it's not. Also I've only started with rating albums a couple of months ago and I wanted to do those I've known for a long time first. Still got easily 100 or more albums on my list with a lot of stuff I never heard of before. Btw I never said that non-popularity itself is important for me. But I'm tired of stating my point. Especially if you didn't even bother reading my "long" reply earlier or just basically don't want to understand it because I don't have 1235071245 comments yet and don't listen to "REALLY unknown musicians" (lol @ hypocrisy). Since when was discussing something on sputnik possible or smart anyways so fuck it " - same dude same thread but oh the butthurt...: Refer to above
78Lamb of God
Resolution


"Solid as a baked turd" - zakalwe. The replies are pretty hilarious too: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/album.php?reviewid=47563&page=26#comments
79The Notorious B.I.G.
Ready to Die


"I find rap just plain crappy poetry over a beat. I agree with Fee, actually. The best rappers are the ones that rap about something other than slapping fine ass ho's. Eminem and Kanye West rap about something other than women and livin in the south and getting crunk. They're the best." - Electric City displaying the dangers of ignorance: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/1459/The-Notorious-B.I.G.-Ready-to-Die/
80Imagine Dragons
Night Visions


"Lead single Radioactive was the band's biggest hit, and it opens the album rather nicely. With a dubstep feel reminiscent of thrash metal and angry vocals, the angst highlights the penetrating anger and fury, which is what I look for. The more angrier an album is, the better. "I'M WAKING UP I FEEL IT IN MY BONES" like an orgasm haha" - This guy just...wow: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/58498/Imagine-Dragons-Night-Visions/
81Armistice
Armistice


"'I came out of the closet from a south philly basement caked in stale cum and sweat and my name is andcas,' Soupy Campbell sings into the microphone." - Sowing's marriage thread, for the love of God I prey he doesn't give the address of his wedding publically to Sput: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/list.php?listid=128888&memberid=317268
82Slaves
Through Art We Are All Equals


"I'm officially giving this title the AOTC award.... the Album of the Century. Each and every track is great, although the standout tracks (for me, at least) are track 07 (There Is Only One God And His Name Is Death) and track 11 (Starving for Friends). Anyone who says this album sucks is usually a Jonny hater. No matter how good it is, they will say otherwise. Not because the music is bad, but because of their personal feelings towards Jonny, which is stupid. You don't do the same with actors, do you now? If Jake Gyllenhaal was a terrible human being.. would you still call Donnie Darko a lame movie, just because of Jake's personality? No, you wouldn't. AOTC. I'm calling it." - A soundoff for Slaves's debut album from a user named Slaves, I wonder what the correlation is: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/soundoff.php?albumid=159934
83Matty Mullins
Matty Mullins


"guys, let's be fair, this is Matty Mullins, not Claude Debussy.. seriously what did you expect?
It's pretty good for what it is. It's a pretty good background music for school girls while they
learn or sit on a bus. The music fills it's purpose. Surely it isn't for me but I'm trying to be
objective. I'm sure most Converge fans can't enjoy Beethoven, does it mean Beethoven is "awful" or
"poor"? hmm... I don't think so" - wwba's soundoff for Matty Mullins, apparently can't realise that all because it caters to a specific auidence doesn't mean it's free from scrutiny: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/soundoff.php?albumid=169121
84Sensory Deprivation
White Noise


"3.5 aka i don't want to hurt your feelings but i don't like this" - Futures on this thread before his comments were wiped: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/album.php?reviewid=65847&page=10#comments
85The Strokes
Is This It


This list with a lovely story by TheSpaceMan, here's a few highlights and source: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/list.php?memberid=730819&listid=144746

"High as fuck, eyes redder than Satan's pussy, car perpetually smells like a blunt"

Officer strolls over with a flashlight, I try my best to coherently ask "Good evening
officer, hows it going?" but instead I blurt out "Hey whats up?"

"He asks for my information and I hand it over, asks if the car is registered and somehow took my word for it. Cop disappears into his car and masturbates for an hour like they usually do after they take your info. His cop lights and the suspense are pushing my cardiovascular system to its limit"

"Suddenly a female voice appears to my right, a female cop spawned out of nowhere asking for my buddies ID, which of course he doesn't have. Luckily she's hot as fuck"
86Kanye West
Yeezus


This whole thread, have fun: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/58063/Kanye-West-Yeezus/
87Blind Guardian
Nightfall in Middle-Earth


"jam power metal or parachute into mt. vesuvius" - Unknown, but what a glorious statement which everyone should heed.
88Ted Nugent
Shutup&jam!


"Never in my life have I heard such beautiful sounds that fill me to the brim with emotions I never thought possible, it felt like I was constantly having sex while winning the lotto at the same time. This album is like a beautiful naked women standing in front of you with a seductive smile, you got to grab her by the tits and go all in without looking back or thinking of herpes." - Sanic69 describing a scenerio I wish I was in right now: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/63509/Ted-Nugent-Shutupjam%21/
89Gorguts
Obscura


"i'm infamous for hating obscura era gorguts" - SomeSayShesNaive gloating on their l33t-tier taste until getting destroyed by the mods, beautiful: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/list.php?memberid=1057869
90My Bloody Valentine
Loveless


My valentine isn't the only thing that's bleeding. My ears are too after listening to this band.- cagedbutterfly showing they have very sensitive ear pussies: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/list.php?memberid=609975&listid=149064
91Whitechapel
Our Endless War


"I got into deathcore back in 2008 when I was 9." - Troll Br00talK1d gives us a gem that at least one person in real life would actually say seriously: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/list.php?memberid=1051618&listid=147831
92Hello Kitty Suicide Club
^_^


First post of this thread, too big to post here. Basically one of the biggest e-tantrums you'll witness: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/forums/showthread.php?t=635319
93N.W.A.
Straight Outta Compton


"yea if they're rock related but i think hip hop culture sells way more in that aspect these days

so if they released a weezer biopic it wouldn't make nearly as much

thats the new world we live in " - Tresm87 once again being an idiot on a NWA thread: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/album.php?reviewid=68184&page=2#comments
94Rush
2112


Some random youtuber kid thought he'd get a following by badly reviewing rush albums, sonic and KILL proceed to mess with him combined with legitimate criticism and his childish rants culminates in this mess of a video: http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x2jf2ns

"Rush by Rush gets 4 stars, which is like, an 8/10 theoretically."

http://www.sputnikmusic.com/review/66398/Rush-2112/
95Slipknot
Slipknot


"I'm convinced that prosthetics is more frightening as a song than any horror movie I've seen and I'm an avid horror fan that song is so fucking creepy its a masterpiece" - tresm87 on the topic of Slipknot, who definately hasn't watched Tetsuo (not a horror movie but whatever): http://www.sputnikmusic.com/album.php?reviewid=4136&page=29#comments
96Avenged Sevenfold
City of Evil


"
sometimes when I'm alone in the bathtub I start flopping my dick around and do walrus calls as I splash all around and then furiously shit all over the bathroom in a raging fit because my wench refuses to let me buttfuck her so then I grab my mountain dew and my copy of call of duty black cops and start jamming city of evil because I'm so tortured" - SoccerRiot sympathizing with the plight of many teenage boys across America: No source given.
97Yellowcard
Southern Air


"When we were 14, I was that guy who was nailing your first girlfriend after she dumped your bitch ass for listening to pussy shit like Yellowcard." - theacadamy showing off how much of a 'true' man he is: No source given
98Crotchduster
Big Fat Box of Shit


TRMShadow: "http://highdeas.com/

Awesome site"

Dryden: "bet no one on that site has thought of the idea of getting 3 guys to put thier dick in bowling ball holes getting hard then trying to left the ball up"

http://41.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l893q7lHD61qd37u4o1_1280.jpg
99Cursive
The Ugly Organ


pmmets07: So my best (female) friend (who I'm secretly totally in love with) is going to college in a week, and we are hanging out for the last time tomorrow before she leaves. I wrote her this really long, pathetic letter basically saying everything that I was afraid to say in person. kinda nervous about it, but fuck it. I love her. These, these are albums I like"

Tits MeGee: "grow a pair and tell her in person"

Dryden: "show her your cock and say she isnt going no where"

http://41.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l7h39vzQjZ1qd37u4o1_1280.png
100Godspeed You! Black Emperor
F#A# (Infinity)


"Someone put a penny inside my copy :)" - Hong Tam, as he proceeds to be retarded and not figure out how to use craigslist and disregards all opinions and thinks reviews on Amazon is what he should follow as legitimate advice: - http://www.sputnikmusic.com/list.php?memberid=848379&listid=151994
101Dir En Grey
Dum Spiro Spero


"honestly track 2 was going swell until he started singing. visual kei vocals will forever be shit
edit: ok on track 6 and luckily there hasn't been much visual kei vocals, just a lot of
inhuman noises
editedit: do not feel the need to listen to this again...." - BigSimo creating the most stupid and ignorant sound off of all time: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/soundoff.php?albumid=79064
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