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Staff
Reviews 122
Soundoffs 22
News Articles 5
Band Edits + Tags 49
Album Edits 102
Album Ratings 1845
Objectivity 75%
Last Active 12-26-22 12:27 pm
Joined 10-20-12
Review Comments 4,730
| My 10 favorite (active) writers on sputnik (WIP)
In no particular order. This has next to nothing to do with how I feel about y'all as users (though you're all great), this is strictly based on how much I enjoy your reviews/ appreciate your writing style. Tried to steer away from staff writers, you all know your worth already, though some were just unavoidable. Will be fielding suggestions for the final two, looking to get into some of the more unknown talent on this site as well. | | 1 |  | Dmitri Shostakovich
String Quartet No. 5 in B flat major, Op. 92
kildare - I'm primarily basing this on two reviews, but this guy not only had the chutzpah to hit up Shostakovickh's 5th string quartet, but to make it one of the most in-depth, well-researched pieces I've read on this site. The thing is absolutely sprawling, as kildare covers an incredible amount on the piece itself and its historical context. His Black Uhuru review is no less daunting, but just as engaging as he picks apart not just the album but reggae itself on a theory level with a multiparagraph digression on blues scales, and you know what? He makes it fucking engaging. Hats off to this dude, really wish he wrote more. | | 2 |  | Cabaret Voltaire
Three Mantras
Borracho - This is a writer that I get genuinely excited to see on the front page; not only am I likely to get an insight into some unappreciated obscurity of a style of music I have a lot of appreciation for, but it's all delivered in a serious, professional style that gets to the meat and bones of the piece in question without any fluff or gimmicks. His knowledge of rare gems in post-punk and noise rock is absolutely unparalleled and his taste is unimpeachable and his reviews are a delight. | | 3 |  | Seiko Oomori
PINK
JohnnyoftheWell - his insouciance lends panache, his knack for witticism and withering bon mots is damn-near Wildean, but when Johnny gets down to actually writing something, actually digging into a piece of music and casting its effect into words, few on this site do it as smoothly or professionally. He's absolutely mastered the format of the review to the point that he's made it something of a literary plaything, with an irreverence that never compromises the review itself and reminds one that this isn't a professional corporate music journalism business and it is much better off for it. | | 4 |  | pizzamachine
HELLISH DEVICES
You all knew this was coming. The most interesting thing about pizza is that he actually can write when he has a mind to do it. His almost casual disdain for pedigree or editing or selectivity makes him something of an internet Diogenes, and frankly, after having this contributor title for a few months, I can sympathize. When pizza's on, he's a very competent reviewer with a knack for humorous metaphor that's been sorely missed since the departure of KILL. When he's not on, it really makes no difference, he's going to write and literally nothing can stop him. A thoroughgoingly decent dude as well. | | 5 |  | Infinity Crush
Sestinas
JesperL - encapsulating an album in short form is no easy feat. JesperL does it elegantly, but without being stultified about it, with a sense of casual conversation that nonetheless manages to be erudite and to-the-point. Jesper drops his opinions simply, intelligently and with so little affectation or even padding that his reviews read like a friendly conversation you have while you listen to the album. This makes his writeups less an exercise in evaluating the writing, but a more pure evaluation of the music itself, without the fluff and ego which can bog down wordier reviews. | | 6 |  | Underworld
dubnobasswithmyheadman
Parksungjoon - More known for his ubiquity in the comments section, his acerbic wit and his unimpeachable taste, Park's also an excellent writer who sputnik's review section could certainly see more of. With a head for historical context and a talent for transitioning that context into his evaluation of the album itself, his reviews are an informative deep-dive that always justify their length. | | 7 |  | Oxbow
King of the Jews
someone - Another user who sput could see more of, though when you dive into his sprawling breakdowns it's easy to see why he might not be as prolific as others. Someone's reviews are wonderfully original, provocative, nearly manic in their bristling energy, which fits his subject matter as the bulk of his brief ouvre is highly pedigreed underground oddness. His reviews are enough of an exercise in originality and style that their length only very rarely intimidates. | | 8 |  | Cradle of Filth
Thornography
PumpBoffBag - A user who manages to walk that tightrope between prolific and professional, Pump's output is as impressive as his ability to avoid getting too formulaic, a big pitfall when attempting to write as often as he does. This already makes him something of a rarity on sput, and that he's able to extend this to a wide range of styles makes him one of the most versatile writers as well. | | 9 |  | Willi Carlisle
Peculiar, Missouri
Kompys2000 - Kompys is good at connecting the thread of their personal life to the album they're reviewing in a way that never feels self-absorbed or bloggy, but rather grounds their review in the enthusiasm and excitement that the album brings to them personally. Seriously, their reviews are brimming with energy, dotted with exclamation points and little personal takes that make their writeups not just a fun read, but a delightfully informative one as well. | | 10 |  | Silverchair
Frogstomp | |
parksungjoon
05.03.23 | lol i dont belong on this list
swap me out with kompys or ryus | parksungjoon
05.03.23 | or ffs, love ffs | DadKungFu
05.03.23 | Yes ryus need ryus on here didn't realize he'd written anything recently | Mort.
05.03.23 | not mort just ten times in a row, bad list, fuck yourself loser | pizzamachine
05.03.23 | I’m honoured to be included among these competent writers. Now to get the Contrib title back lol | DadKungFu
05.03.23 | Kompys for their stellar Willi Carlisle review and I've rounded out that top 10 | JohnnyoftheWell
05.03.23 | honoured to have been included here, partially for the kind words but mainly because shit damn yep, the other choices here are on point this is fine company. 1 and 2 were in particular need of highlighting, glad to seem em here
lotta great folks who could fill that #10 spot who's it gon be huh
also, much as ryus reviews are great and I'm always glad to see em go up, that boi would reap rapid benefit from writing more often, which he should absolutely do (as should norma, who is a good good model for the school of crystal clarity) | Ryus
05.03.23 | yeah i wouldnt call myself active lol, or particularly good
dont think ill ever be reviewing consistently, just whenever i have a bout of inspiration | SteakByrnes
05.03.23 | I am number 10 | mkmusic1995
05.03.23 | Great picks! Johnny and I disagree almost entirely on every record we both happen to listen to but I always love reading his takes and thoughts. Pizza and Pump are also awesome! | Manatea
05.03.23 | I agree with this list entirely | JohnnyoftheWell
05.03.23 | ryus your Surgeon and Andrea revs were dope and had rly solid contextual grounding, and we all know from the comments that you can flesh out a take on most things if needed lol, don't be too stingy with those fits of inspo | DadKungFu
05.03.23 | It’s still Ryus for 10 I just need the time to do a proper writeup
Edit hate to be a shit but just checked orb’s reviews and 1. Damn and 2. how have I never read his stuff before. | BitterJalapenoJr
05.03.23 | A formidable selection of writing prowess here. How the fuck is Pizza not contrib anyway? | pizzamachine
05.03.23 | You know what they say, lose it once never get it back? | BitterJalapenoJr
05.03.23 | Reminds me of Sick Boy's unifying theory of life in Trainspotting.
How'd you lose it anyway? Feel free to tell me to fuck off if that's too personal a question. | pizzamachine
05.03.23 | Probably a mix of me being a young inexperienced kid and writing a scathing review of Kid A which pissed Sputnik off hard - it was a different time. | BitterJalapenoJr
05.03.23 | Had a read of said review and a quick scan of the comments which leads me to the assumption it has been heavily edited since originally posted. Accurate?
End of the day, it's your opinion and we were all young, inexperienced kids at one point. Every one of us will have a few albums we passionately despise despite near universal reverence from others and if we all agreed on everything, this site would be redundant and the world would be a fucking boring place. | pizzamachine
05.03.23 | You might say it’s not the same review at all! Yes, I hate the album, truly. | BitterJalapenoJr
05.03.23 | Despite loving a huge amount of prog and metal, I have a burning hatred of Dream Theater and Haken. Opinions that I imagine will go down like a lead balloon. Each to their own. | pizzamachine
05.03.23 | I get the hate. There are plenty other prog bands that deserve a piece of that larger audience pie. | kildare
05.04.23 | Holy moly, I’m totally overwhelmed. It has been alleged in the past that I'm a decent writer, but I'll be damned if I can come up with a satisfactory way to say how honored I am to be both singled out by DadKungFu and included here with these others, all of whom I also follow. I know this sounds like a saccharine thing to say, but honestly as it happens DadKungFu is in turn one of my favorite writers. His discussions are tight, and his choice of albums are far more wide ranging than mine, and I’m always impressed he can handle them with equal ease. Huge morning morale boost. I've long thought Sputnikmusic was the coolest site online, and get a huge kick out of being a part of it, recognition or not. But the recognition is really freak'n cool. And I wish I could've matched Johnny's "damn shit yup." | Egarran
05.04.23 | A fine and correct list. I'm mostly here for love and banter but it's important to remember that 90% of reviews here are fantastic. | Minortimbo12
05.05.23 | Correct list. | parksungjoon
07.22.23 | ryus got snubbed !!! |
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