cordwainerbird: | Sputnikmusic

cordwainerbird 08.31.21	fucking fuck
zakalwe 08.31.21	Being less self absorbed is always a good start
cordwainerbird 08.31.21	heard of venting? also being edgy online is cool
cordwainerbird 08.31.21	anyway these albums are great and recent digs
zakalwe 08.31.21	I vent like fuck mate
cordwainerbird 08.31.21	i wish i were less self absorbed. im way too up my own ass about being in shape so that doesnt help
Sharenge 08.31.21	stress builds character
cordwainerbird 08.31.21	flip between too much pride and none at all but i guess thats the bipolar
cordwainerbird 08.31.21	thanks id like to believe that
zakalwe 08.31.21	Yeah, that fucking gym nonsense. Absolute fucking shit. Steroids and bumboys
Sharenge 08.31.21	lol I was being at least partially sarcastic - it's a song title - check it out might be up your alley
cordwainerbird 08.31.21	im in it man! by choice! its way too fucking important for me to be huge
cordwainerbird 08.31.21	and im a GIRL for fucks sake
cordwainerbird 08.31.21	will do sharenge. apparently im still ranting
WatchItExplode 08.31.21	Sounds like a good deal less stimulation would be good for you. Couple days in the woods alone might straighten you out
zakalwe 08.31.21	Jamrag
cordwainerbird 08.31.21	ok making this definitely helped
cordwainerbird 08.31.21	yea some real henry david thoreau walden ass bullshit
sonictheplumber 08.31.21	triggered? :D
DavidYowi 08.31.21	Currently in my early 20s and yeah so far this sucks. Bad mix of feeling like you know nothing about the world but feeling like you should know more that you actually do. A bit of a tangent but I feel like when people say stuff like “I wish I were a kid again” what they really mean is that they wish they had more time to do things that they actually enjoy.
cordwainerbird 08.31.21	if i was triggered this would be at least a bit more fun wtf would i be triggered by lol
MiloRuggles 08.31.21	Sending love your way. Try slowly lifting the pedal if you can. I try to only partake if I'm already in a good mood/have been positively productive with my life, not when I'm just bored, sad, frustrated etc. That way it feels less like self-medicating and more like celebrating.
Sharenge 08.31.21	when I saw the bit "it's always this about a career, money and education - I'm tired of hearing about it but it never goes away" it just made me think of some of the lines
cordwainerbird 08.31.21	im glad u know what i mean david. fr every time i see u pop up in album threads or whatever i always feel a sense of comradery or kinship. maybe the whole LGBTQA queer thing. anyway im always rooting for u dude, seriously i hear u on the kid thing. i think i overcompensate by living as actively as i can right now. that certainly has its drawbacks (as you can see here). it has its pluses too though, but those feel so goddamn fleeting
cordwainerbird 08.31.21	thanks a lot milo. that is some really good insight < 3 love ur way as well
widowslaugh123 08.31.21	Anyways, um... I bought a whole bunch of shungite rocks, do you know what shungite is? Anybody know what shungite is? No, not Suge Knight, I think he's locked up in prison. I'm talkin' shungite. Anyways, it's a two billion year-old like, rock stone that protects against frequencies and unwanted frequencies that may be traveling in the air. That's my story, I bought a whole bunch of stuff. Put 'em around the la casa. Little pyramids, stuff like that.
cordwainerbird 08.31.21	will def listen after dream theater
cordwainerbird 08.31.21	whats that copypasta i adore it
sonictheplumber 08.31.21	prayers
Gyromania 08.31.21	psychedelics help you get in touch with your emotional side, so...
DavidYowi 08.31.21	“im glad u know what i mean david. fr every time i see u pop up in album threads or whatever i always feel a sense of comradery or kinship. maybe the whole LGBTQA queer thing. anyway im always rooting for u dude, seriously” The feeling is mutual < 3
Lord(e)Po)))ts 08.31.21	One day, somewhere in your mid/late 20s, your angsty teenage brain will start working mo' better, and you will reread this list and cringe-die, but you will also feel much better.
keaton_86 08.31.21	You ok? Drugs are a motherfucker simply because they creep up on you. They should be the spice of life, not the main course. I find if you're doing them too much it could be because of the people you're around normalising it, so try and remove yourself from that situation, which is much easier said than done. Psychs will fuck with you so try not to do too much of them. Maybe once or twice a year for acid, maybe one a year for shrooms. But yeah, if that shit is overwhelming, just try and not do them. Its often just as fun to do drugs as it is to not do them, and fuck with people that always want to do them.
SlothcoreSam 08.31.21	Lol, I'm literally in the middle of destroying out of date opioids, amphetamines, cocaine and benzos
Gyromania 08.31.21	i hear benzos are really good trip killers. is that true?
rabidfish 08.31.21	Try reading some philosophy that interests you, that helps.
cordwainerbird 08.31.21	thanks potts it means a lot keaton thats some great ass wisdom. i really value that. im going to find a good balance i hope. all i know are those are some good guidelines and that i really need to get sober. ill do my best. thanks again rabid ive been into all some philosophy stuff lately but it just depresses me more so maybe i need some different philosophy shit. some new books to read. its been a long few hours. coming down from shrooms now. im feeling a lot better. sometimes this stuff will just cleanse you out
cordwainerbird 08.31.21	thanks to everyone ITT and on this site or whatever seriously i needed a wake up call
sonictheplumber 08.31.21	best of wishes
MO 08.31.21	Agreed dude they're not needed. Take it from a guy who's almost done it all. It's not worth it
Gyromania 09.01.21	i lost my parents to hard drugs (painkillers like percs), so i definitely empathize with anyone struggling to battle drug addiction. but still, psyches seem to have the opposite effect on most people. taken in moderate-larger quantities for shrooms and acid, people often experience huge ego dissolution which changes their perspective on life. so "replace your lack of emotions or suppress them when its all too fucking much" this shouldn't be the case if you're using psyches BUT definitely if you're taking more pain pills and shit like weed/alcohol, yeah. that shit is fucking rough. lately, mushrooms have actually been helping me to get off of other drugs, but everyone's different. wishing you all the best
Sharenge 09.01.21	o I flushed what was left of some good ass weed down the toilet once years and years ago while tripping out on mushrooms... this is par for the course go spend some time in the nature with a buddy if you ever do them again... it can be easy to go into 'existential dread' mode on them, especially if you're alone, but probably not usually the best way to enjoy the experience (whether it constitutes a 'bad trip' or getting a drug-induced "wtf am I doing with my life" wake-up call has any value I suppose is up for debate)
Sharenge 09.01.21	oop
TheAntichrist 09.01.21	i'll fuck it anally
Sharenge 09.01.21	ya dirty dog
TheAntichrist 09.01.21	dirty doggystyle
cordwainerbird 09.01.21	gyro thats real great insight. important stuff for me to chew on. "ego dissolution" and those byproducts are really something that hit home. it was just too fucking much. started to feel so muddled. and yeah.. looking back shrooms have always been the thing that have helped me most with my addiction (with one exception where i was in pain and it amplified it, tenfold). lately such as today, the trip's been a real soul cleanser. real good thing. real grateful. weed does make it all worse. acid is just wack shit central, lots of time and space distortion but thats not something i need right now. ill give sobriety a shot. or at the very least tone it way the fuck down. somehow ill do it. i know the alternative is worse
cordwainerbird 09.01.21	shar thats a great idea. will try to do something like that < 3
Gyromania 09.01.21	yeah like, microdosing mushrooms could be hugely beneficial to you for depression and staving off addiction, that might be worth looking into. and about the pain, weed tends to amplify that shit tenfold for me, which is weird since it's taken so regularly FOR pain management haha.
chemicalmarriage 09.01.21	Definitely not doing drugs with you. Fuck this bummer trip bullshit
Sharenge 09.01.21	xD lool
keaton_86 09.01.21	Weed is an amplifier. If you're happy, it makes you happy, if you're listening to a song you love, you'll hear shit you normally ignored. If you're depressed, it'll make it much worse. It's not as harmless as people think it is. Also, the green haze is very real. I've met very few people that can function properly when smoking every day, but I've met a lot of fuckwits who slowly lose their jobs and friends who think they're managing just fine
Brabiz 09.01.21	Try doing literally anything else. This is cringe. And also gay.
cordwainerbird 09.01.21	^as if i dont? fuck off. nice comment u fucking clown plenty of glowing testimonials chem. only the worst company with myself : ) keaton yea for sure. very aware of the amplifying effects and whatnot, ive been using for a long ass time. its the fuckin haze ur talking abt and dependency i wasnt used to. i guess i should have seen this coming. im just glad because i know it couldve been a lot worse
cordwainerbird 09.01.21	and shar i checked ur song out. that is some intense ass shit. screechy ass vocals. dark. interesting sound. dig the industrial elements feeling way better today. rly needed to make this thread. will keep it up as a reminder for now ig
keaton_86 09.02.21	"i guess i should have seen this coming." Mate you're not the first person and you won't be the last. Like I said, drugs sneak up on you. Try going to the gym or for walks around your neighbourhood. I know it sounds kinda boring, but gymming and running will massively change your perspective on yourself or your body and soul.
Yuli 09.02.21	You can get sober if that’s what you need! I’ve been sober now for three months and it’s helped me so much. Feel free to leave me a message on my shoutbox if you want to talk any : )