Colton
User

Reviews 8
Approval 90%

Soundoffs 46
Album Ratings 1229
Objectivity 84%

Last Active 11-30-21 7:05 am
Joined 02-17-20

Forum Posts 23
Review Comments 13,284

 Lists
11.10.21 not quoting comments anymore10.20.21 Bands I also seriously 5 and 1
09.16.21 mysterious saxophone woman 09.09.21 metal albums ranked (worst to best)
08.16.21 fastest typer on sputnik08.14.21 this list has only good comments
07.20.21 shitty 2021 artwork07.18.21 The Real Umbrella Contest
06.15.21 just drank soap05.04.21 not saying lol anymore
02.16.21 best albums with animals on the cover12.27.20 Worst ways to talk about music
09.22.20 Best albums with black and white covers08.23.20 Best albums with green covers
07.26.20 Sputnik Smash Thread07.22.20 Best albums with red covers
07.19.20 Best albums with blue album covers (par07.03.20 Best albums with hills on the cover

metal albums ranked (worst to best)

Ryus told me to rank the metal/metal adjacent albums I've heard. I'll rank them based on how much they made me wanna kill myself
1The Dillinger Escape Plan
Plagiarism


comically over the top and goofy vocals, sounds like someone doing a parody of what they perceive screamo to be. Like if they were trying to depict it as being way worse than any album could ever possibly be except it's actually that bad
2The Dillinger Escape Plan
Ire Works


same thing
3brokeNCYDE
The Broken


also feels like a parody but it does have some entertainment value. I don't understand why people say this is so bad, yet Converge and TDEP are critically acclaimed. Probably never will
4The Dillinger Escape Plan
Calculating Infinity


this band's music is all the exact same except these two have better guitar than the first two by a slight margin
5The Dillinger Escape Plan
Miss Machine


^
6Orchid
Chaos Is Me


basically TDEP. no observable differences
7Dance Gavin Dance
Afterburner


very very bad but at least buddy's not screaming the entire time
8Converge
Jane Doe


basically TDEP and Orchid no observable differences
9Converge
No Heroes


^
10Unwound
New Plastic Ideas


zero recollection of this
11 Ulcerate
the newest one


don't really rememebr but I remember it at least being kinda well produced, you could actually sometimes distinguish one sound from another
12Zeal and Ardor
Stranger Fruit


Kinda like this honestly, it shows tact and restraint
13Metallica
Ride the Lightning


good band, listenable
14Poppy
EAT (NXT Soundtrack)


best metal I've ever heard by a considerable margin and I swear to god I'm not even memeing
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