Sputnik\'s Go-To Doom/Stoner/Sludge Guy

Reviews 12
Approval 93%

Soundoffs 12
Album Ratings 2076
Objectivity 74%

Last Active 07-28-20 11:12 pm
Joined 09-11-17

Forum Posts 4
Review Comments 989

10.27.20 Metal Albums that wont happen10.05.20 I’ll write review on LSD
08.13.20 Alt account ideas?08.12.20 Good groove metal (not Pantera)
07.23.20 I've never heard OPETH07.20.20 NEW WAVE OF DOOM METAL
07.16.20 Best metal album of 200104.05.19 Crowbar RANKED
04.03.19 10 Metal albums EVERYONE should hear03.19.19 Best One-Hit Wonders?
02.27.19 Śmök üp //// tøkê ūp02.20.19 POLL: Best Comeback Album?
07.27.18 Sputnik user spotlight!07.24.18 Celebrities on Sputnik?
07.11.18 Least fave track from all my 5/5’s07.05.18 Your first rating?
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Alt account ideas?

Hi, after seeing Bigglestein shitpost for over a month now without being banned, I was thinking of an even dumber alt to become everyone’s favorite user to roll their eyes at. Here are some ideas:
1Willie Nelson and Merle Haggard
Seashores Of Old Mexico

a meth head redneck who loves country
2Lil Romeo
Game Time

a take on shitty 2000’s rappers. Basically just imagine if Soulja Boy had a sputnik account
3Black Veil Brides
Black Veil Brides

I impersonate dalton dubois
4Full Metal Confused
Full Metal Confused

GunnerySGTHartman - I only quote lines from Full Metal Jacket
5My Penis Is Made of Dogshit
Satanic Jazz

Lordepots2.0, this time ever lordier and potsier
6Nostalgia Critic
The Wall

I remember way back in like 2007, Doug Walker posted on IMDb about his favorite music. It was nothing but old-school classical, jazz, and movie OST’s, as well as some metal bands like Metallica and Slipknot, and rappers like Fu Shnickens. He also obviously likes Pink Floyd.
blue shift emissions.

I painstakingly look up every single Robert Christgau rating and put it on Sputnik. If I had hears to waste, I’d also do Allmusic.
8John Carpenter

James Woods - ultra high IQ, extremely verbose, complete conservative asshole. Could also alternatively be a Ben Shapiro alt, since he actually likes music (rap ewww!)

SlayerFan666 - the most stereotypical meathead metalhead ever. Likes nothing but BRUUUTAALLLLLL metal and 5/5’s the entire Slayer discog.
10Lie Or Liar

I know so many deathcore fans that hate good old school metal because it “isn’t heavy enough” but love retarded djentcore because OOH ITS IN DROP Z TUNING AND IS NOTHING BUT 0-000-00-0 BREAKDOWNS!!!!
11Limp Bizkit
Chocolate Starfish and the Hot Dog Flavored Water

Fred Durst. It’s just one of those dayz
12Project: Failing Flesh
Count Back From Ten

We finally get zaryuche a girlfriend
13Aira Mitsuki x Saori@destiny
Park Of The Safari

A japanese user who only posts in japanese. Likes nothin but J-pop, nightcore, video game OST’s, and the gerogieregegegegege
14Dogs Die In Hot Cars
Please Describe Yourself

An open account anyone can use, but we agree not to change the passwords so everyone can still log in.
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