Mysterio
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Soundoffs 5
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Last Active 08-04-12 4:22 pm
Joined 08-04-12

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08.04.12 Two Failed Abortions

Two Failed Abortions

No this list isn't about the Olsen Twins, it's about "In the Aeroplane over the Sea" by Neutral Milk Hotel, and "Perfect World" by some shitty Canadian band...
1 In the Aeroplane Over the Sea
Neutral Milk Hotel

Holy hell, where do I even begin. I [regretfully] started out on King of Carrot Flowers Pt. 1. Sounding decidedly average and featuring stupendously bland vocal work, I felt utterly dismayed. Listening to the lyrics, it did paint a vivid picture. A young boy whose parents are having fights with kitchen utensils, while he has sexual experiments with his sister(?). Pretty bloody unsettling. However, as far as objective judgment goes, it isn't nearly as bad as its counterpart, King of Carrot Flowers pt. 2. This song was just atrocious, and I was on the verge of giving up on this album right then and there, but I endured, somehow (You're welcome). The singing on this particular track sounded like my uncle drunkenly singing Christian-karaoke while lying on his back. Half of it was just incomprehensible mumbling into the microphone. The lyrics made about as much sense as the arrangement, which is to say, none. Sloppy and painful sums it up pretty well. The only song that was even tolerable was the Self-titled one. Again, pretty bland, but at least it didn't cause any internal bleeding like the other god forsaken tracks on this album.
Two-Headed boy is equally as unsettling lyrically as the first track, but has much less of the quality that the first one had. Rambling vocals, weak instruments, and queerness for the sake of queerness. I'm just going to glaze over the rest, as it's just more of the same overrated garbage. Apart from the bagpipe bit on Untitled. That sounded like a groping, desperate attempt to be different (Kind of like the lyrics to all these songs), and appeared to be played by an amateur (unless abrasive and badly timed was what they were going for).
For a final note, I'd like to address the masses who rave about this album on this site. I don't know if it makes you feel "cool" or "special" to like something as ridiculous as this but it doesn't. Seriously. Time to grow up. And I know you're all going to say stuff like "This d-bag just doesn't get it", but I do get it, it just isn't worth getting. Objectively here, I'm not taking into account any of the supposed "lyrical genius" of this album in this next sentence: The musical aspect of this album, is absolutely horrendous. I could do better playing a pan flute wedged between my buttocks.
I'm not sure how to end this one, as I know I'm going to offend practically this entire site, but whatever. Enjoy your stupid album.
2Web Society
Perfect World

I only chose this album because I actually had to pick one of them. Seeing as all of these albums are exactly the same, it doesn't actually matter at all which one I decided upon. As an intro, Canada has produced some of the finest music around, with a wide and varied quality, indicative of our great country's size and varied geography. I cannot praise Canadian music more. This band also happens to be from Canada, however this does not mean that their music possesses any of the above qualities.
In fact, it only means that this atrocious band is marring our country's musical record. I wouldn't even be bothering with this, except that I can't understand who had the gall to give [all] of these albums upwards of 3.5 or 4.0 (I can't be bothered to look again). It just tweaks me. Honestly I don't have much to say quality wise, it's pretty much self-evident. Yet another Blink-182 clone band with sub-par everything, and especially horrible lyrics that sound like they plucked them straight out of a 13 year old "rebel"s diary. If you don't know what I'm talking about just listen to any one of their songs. Actually don't, that's a bad idea if you want to keep your will to live intact. The amateurish guitar work and simplistic bass playing do nothing to help the songs along. Some especially rusty guitar work on "Legit" was one of the low points (There were many). Sappy/Completely unoriginal song titles like "You and I (Above the Sky:)" and "Rights (I don't Care)" show just how uninspired this work is. I swear this band is like a factory produced kids toy (with some of the parts missing obviously, namely a larynx for the singer, and arms for the guitarist). I'm assuming this band has a humour about themselves, because this can't be entirely serious.
As a final note, this is still marginally better than King of Carrot Cocks part 2 up there (or whatever it's called I don't know).
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