| AC/DC High Voltage | 3.0 |
| AC/DC Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap | 4.0 |
| AC/DC Back In Black | 4.0 |
| Aesop Rock Labor Days | 4.5 |
| Alanis Morissette Jagged Little Pill | 4.0 |
| Alice in Chains Jar of Flies | 4.5 |
| If Alice and Chains played 'Dirt' on a porch somewhere in the South. |
| Alice in Chains MTV Unplugged | 4.5 |
| Alice in Chains Dirt | 5.0 |
| The best grunge album bar none. It's easy to see how this foreshadows Staley's tragic death. |
| Amon Amarth With Oden on Our Side | 4.0 |
| Antonio Vivaldi The Four Seasons | 4.5 |
| Army Of The Pharaohs The Torture Papers | 2.5 |
| At the Drive-In Relationship of Command | 3.5 |
| Atheist Piece of Time | 3.5 |
| Atheist Unquestionable Presence | 4.0 |
| Atheist Jupiter | 4.0 |
| Atheist Elements | 4.5 |
| Audioslave Audioslave | 3.5 |
| Aural Vampire Vampire Ecstasy | 4.5 |
| Bad Religion Into the Unknown | 3.0 |
| Bad Religion The Gray Race | 3.0 |
| Bad Religion Stranger Than Fiction | 3.5 |
| Bad Religion Generator | 3.5 |
| Bad Religion Bad Religion | 3.5 |
| Bad Religion The Process of Belief | 4.0 |
| Bad Religion How Could Hell Be Any Worse? | 4.0 |
| Bad Religion The Empire Strikes First | 4.5 |
| Proving you don't have to sound like shit to play good punk rock. Either that, or I'm just part of the machine, man. |
| Bad Religion Recipe for Hate | 4.5 |
| Bad Religion Suffer | 5.0 |
| I am just an atom in an ectoplasmic sea/Without direction or a reason to exist/The anechoic nebula rotating in my brain/Is persuading me, contritely, to persist rLyrically the greatest album of all time. |
| Bad Religion Against the Grain | 5.0 |
| I'm not entirely sure why I love this album so much. It makes me some cool atheist kid, I guess.rBut in all seriousness, this fucking kicks ass. |
| Beastie Boys Licensed to Ill | 4.0 |
| Between the Buried and Me Colors | 4.0 |
| Black Sabbath Technical Ecstasy | 1.5 |
| Black Sabbath Never Say Die! | 2.0 |
| Black Sabbath Black Sabbath | 4.5 |
| Black Sabbath Paranoid | 5.0 |
| I tried giving this something other than a 5 but Satan punched me in the face and told me to stop being such a pussy. |
| Blackalicious Blazing Arrow | 5.0 |
| Gift of Gab is an absolute BEAST. His delivery is so incredible that I can't do it justice via text. You have to hear it for yourself. Chief Xcel's beats are equally good, and add the right atmosphere to this album that makes it one of the most uplifting in all of hip-hop. |
| Bob Dylan Blood on the Tracks | 4.5 |
| "A lot of people tell me they enjoy that album. It's hard for me to relate to that. I mean, it, you know, people enjoying that type of pain, you know?" |
| Bob Dylan Highway 61 Revisited | 5.0 |
| "Like a Rolling Stone" was named by Rolling Stone magazine as the greatest song of all time. I can see where they're coming from. Then there's the 7 others track of folk-rock perfection ("Desolation Row" being the other major highlight), which make this an absolute masterpiece. 'Blood on the Tracks' nothing, this is Dylan's best album. |
| Boston Boston | 3.5 |
| brokeNCYDE The Broken | 1.0 |
| brokeNCYDE Will Never Die | 1.0 |
| Cannibal Corpse Tomb of the Mutilated | 2.5 |
| Cannibal Corpse Evisceration Plague | 2.5 |
| Cannibal Corpse The Wretched Spawn | 3.0 |
| Cannibal Ox The Cold Vein | 3.0 |
| Celph Titled The Gatalog: A Collection Of Chaos | 4.0 |
| The (main) problem with the Army of the Pharaohs collective is that all of the members are outshined by Celph Titled. Some of the members such as Apathy and Vinnie Paz are good enough to not be completely murdered by a Celph Titled verse, but truth be told his verses are always the funniest and most memorable. This huge collection of songs featuring Celph show why he's the best (and by far the most clever) member of AOTP. |
| Coheed and Cambria From Fear Through the Eyes of Madness | 4.0 |
| Cream Disraeli Gears | 4.5 |
| Creedence Clearwater Revival Chronicle, Vol. 1 | 4.0 |
| Creedence Clearwater Revival Cosmo's Factory | 4.5 |
| Cynic Focus | 4.0 |
| Deftones Around the Fur | 3.0 |
| aka "Be Quiet and Drive (Far Away) + Assorted Background Noise". |
| Deicide Once Upon the Cross | 3.0 |
| Derek and the Dominos Layla and Other Assorted Love Songs | 4.5 |
| Disturbed The Sickness | 2.5 |
| Disturbed Ten Thousand Fists | 3.0 |
| Disturbed Believe | 4.0 |
| Disturbed Indestructible | 4.0 |
| DJ Shadow Endtroducing..... | 4.0 |
| Dusty Springfield Dusty in Memphis | 4.5 |
| Earl Sweatshirt EARL | 4.0 |
| Eminem The Eminem Show | 3.0 |
| Eminem The Slim Shady LP | 3.5 |
| Eminem The Marshall Mathers LP | 5.0 |
| What the hell happened...this record is such a brilliantly well-done display of grandiose violence in music that's its hard to believe this is the same Eminem who made, well, every Eminem album after this one. |
| Emperor In the Nightside Eclipse | 3.0 |
| Eric Clapton Slowhand | 3.5 |
| This is probably closer to a 3, especially because I'm such a huge fan of Dominos-era Clapton, but "Cocaine" and "Wonderful Tonight" make this a great album. |
| Glassjaw Coloring Book | 3.5 |
| Green Day 21st Century Breakdown | 2.0 |
| Green Day Shenanigans | 3.0 |
| Green Day Insomniac | 3.5 |
| Green Day American Idiot | 3.5 |
| Green Day Dookie | 4.0 |
| Greydon Square The Compton Effect | 3.5 |
| Greydon Square Type I: The Kardashev Scale | 3.5 |
| Greydon Square The Cpt Theorem | 4.0 |
| Guns N' Roses Appetite for Destruction | 4.0 |
| GZA Liquid Swords | 3.5 |
| Happy End Kazemachi Roman | 4.5 |
| Iron Maiden Powerslave | 3.5 |
| Iron Maiden The Number of the Beast | 4.0 |
| Iron Maiden Iron Maiden | 4.0 |
| James Taylor Greatest Hits | 4.0 |
| Jay-Z and Kanye West Watch the Throne | 4.0 |
| Don't let me get in my zone. Don't let me get in my zone. Don't let me get in my zone. |
| Jedi Mind Tricks Visions of Gandhi | 1.5 |
| Vinnie Paz is 'Muslim'. He makes that explicitly clear. He hates gays, Christians, the government, and all of the other stuff 'Muslims' hate that gets them the reputation they have among uneducated bigots. Did I mention he hates gays? Highlight lyrics of this album include such gems as "I like anything related to death". Deep. |
| Jedi Mind Tricks A History of Violence | 2.5 |
| Vinnie Paz has become too comfortable rehashing the same flow and thoughts, Jus Allah returns and worries that if he doesn't force 50 rhymed syllables into every bar he'll die, and Stoupe's fascination with string arrangements and female vocal samples becomes annoying rather than awe-inspiring. |
| Jedi Mind Tricks Servants in Heaven, Kings in Hell | 4.0 |
| Finally...Vinnie Paz puts some thought into his lyrics. There's self-loathing, ancient wisdom done right, there's even a Dillinger Escape Plan reference. "Uncommon Valor" is Paz's most mature verse to date, and R.A.'s verse is the single best verse I've ever heard. Definitely the highlight of the album, and even the highlight of JMT's discography. |
| John Williams Star Wars, Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back | 4.0 |
| John Williams Star Wars, Episode VI: Return of the Jedi | 4.5 |
| John Williams Star Wars, Episode IV: A New Hope | 5.0 |
| See my review for my thoughts on the greatest soundtrack of all time. |
| Kanye West Graduation | 3.0 |
| Kanye West Late Registration | 3.5 |
| Kanye West The College Dropout | 4.0 |
| Kanye West 808s and Heartbreak | 4.5 |
| Kanye West My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy | 4.5 |
| Second only to Madvillainy in production, this albums is hampered by West's lyrics and some questionable guest stars. Still pretty close to a 5. |
| Kendrick Lamar Section.80 | 4.0 |
| La Roux La Roux | 4.5 |
| Lady Gaga The Fame Monster | 4.5 |
| Her fashion sense is outrageous, her message can be preachy, and Born this Way is of questionable quality, but The Fame Monster is a superb work of pop music, namely, "Alejandro". Pop's "Like a Rolling Stone", the king of its genre. Yes. It's that good. |
| Lamb of God New American Gospel | 2.0 |
| Lamb of God Wrath | 3.5 |
| Led Zeppelin Led Zeppelin IV | 3.5 |
| Led Zeppelin Physical Graffiti | 4.0 |
| Led Zeppelin Led Zeppelin II | 4.5 |
| Linkin Park Hybrid Theory | 4.0 |
| Mac Lethal The Original 11:11 Sessions | 4.0 |
| Madvillain Madvillainy | 5.0 |
| DOOM engrosses the listener in such a dense wall of rhymes and Madlib's production is so involved (it's the best-produced hip-hop album ever in my opinion) that the natural high this record induces in you almost starts to approach the artificial high they utilized to make this record. |
| Manic Street Preachers The Holy Bible | 4.0 |
| Maximum the Hormone Rokkinpo Goroshi | 3.5 |
| Maximum the Hormone Bu-ikikaesu | 4.0 |
| Megadeth Youthanasia | 3.5 |
| Megadeth United Abominations | 3.5 |
| Megadeth Rust in Peace | 4.5 |
| MellowHype Yellowhite | 3.0 |
| MellowHype BLACKENEDWHITE | 3.5 |
| Metallica St. Anger | 3.0 |
| Gets way more shit than it should, and it's a more honest-to-themselves record than the shitty piece of fan-service that is "Death Magnetic". |
| Metallica Reload | 3.0 |
| Metallica Load | 3.0 |
| Metallica Death Magnetic | 3.0 |
| Begrudgingly giving this a 3 because I subjectively despise it but it's not that bad. |
| Metallica Garage Inc. | 3.5 |
| Metallica Metallica | 3.5 |
| Metallica Kill 'Em All | 4.0 |
| Metallica Ride the Lightning | 4.5 |
| Metallica ...And Justice for All | 4.5 |
| Metallica Master of Puppets | 5.0 |
| The pinnacle of a genre. R.I.P. Cliff Burton, Metallica died with you. |
| Michael Jackson Thriller | 3.0 |
| Nas STILLmatic | 3.5 |
| Nas Illmatic | 5.0 |
| Deep like The Shinin', sparkle like a diamond/Sneak a uzi on the island in my army jacket linin/Hit the Earth like a comet, invasion/Nas is like the Afrocentric Asian, half-man, half-amazin |
| Neil Young Decade | 3.5 |
| Neil Young Harvest | 4.5 |
| Neutral Milk Hotel In the Aeroplane Over the Sea | 4.5 |
| Nickelback Silver Side Up | 3.0 |
| One Day as a Lion One Day as a Lion | 4.0 |
| Opeth Damnation | 4.0 |
| Ozzy Osbourne Diary of a Madman | 3.0 |
| Ozzy Osbourne Bark at the Moon | 3.0 |
| Ozzy Osbourne Blizzard of Ozz | 4.5 |
| Pantera Metal Magic | 2.0 |
| Pantera Reinventing the Steel | 3.0 |
| Pantera Cowboys from Hell | 4.0 |
| Pantera Vulgar Display of Power | 4.5 |
| Pantera The Great Southern Trendkill | 4.5 |
| Pearl Jam Yield | 3.5 |
| Pearl Jam Ten | 5.0 |
| You know why it's called "Ten"? Because that's the rating it deserves. Even though sputnik only goes up to 5. This is pure, raw emotion, a gem of the 90's rock movement and Vedder's "golden baritone" is godlike. |
| Philip Selway Familial | 3.0 |
| Pig Destroyer Terrifyer | 4.0 |
| Pink Floyd The Final Cut | 3.5 |
| Pink Floyd The Dark Side of the Moon | 4.0 |
| Pink Floyd Animals | 5.0 |
| This sprawling five-song epic is just too damn good. The best album from a band I absolutely worship. |
| Pink Floyd Wish You Were Here | 5.0 |
| Pink Floyd showing yet again why they're probably the best rock band ever. |
| Pink Floyd The Wall | 5.0 |
| One of the all time best Floyd albums. It's their most rock-oriented, contains what may be the greatest guitar solo of all time, and its nihilistic message adds a certain philosophical weight. |
| Queens of the Stone Age Songs for the Deaf | 4.0 |
| R.E.M. In Time: The Best of R.E.M. 1988-2003 | 4.0 |
| Radiohead My Iron Lung | 2.5 |
| Radiohead Amnesiac | 3.0 |
| Radiohead Pablo Honey | 3.0 |
| Radiohead The Bends | 3.5 |
| Radiohead Hail to the Thief | 3.5 |
| Radiohead Airbag/How Am I Driving? | 3.5 |
| Radiohead The King of Limbs | 3.5 |
| Radiohead Kid A | 5.0 |
| This is one of those "how the fuck does a human mind create this" albums. I can't say anything about this that hasn't been said. |
| Radiohead OK Computer | 5.0 |
| The best album of the 90's, and the 20th century, and the A.D.'s, and of all time. Nothing I could say here would explain how much I love this album. |
| Radiohead In Rainbows | 5.0 |
| A less manic-depressive OK Computer with even more gorgeous instrumentation. |
| Rage Against the Machine Evil Empire | 4.0 |
| Rage Against the Machine The Battle of Los Angeles | 4.0 |
| Rage Against the Machine Rage Against the Machine | 4.5 |
| Rise Against Appeal to Reason | 2.5 |
| Rise Against Revolutions per Minute | 4.0 |
| Rise Against Siren Song of the Counter Culture | 4.0 |
| Rise Against The Unraveling | 4.0 |
| Rise Against The Sufferer and the Witness | 4.0 |
| Rush 2112 | 3.5 |
| Sage Francis Personal Journals | 3.5 |
| Santana Supernatural | 4.0 |
| Six Feet Under Maximum Violence | 2.0 |
| Not sure why there's a 'Live' here...boring, repetitive, even a quality cover of Kiss' "War Machine" can't save this album from mediocrity. |
| Slayer Seasons in the Abyss | 3.5 |
| Slayer South of Heaven | 4.0 |
| Slayer Reign in Blood | 4.5 |
| Sleep Sleep's Holy Mountain | 3.5 |
| Sleep Dopesmoker | 4.0 |
| holy war on drugs batman! this album is a holy war on drugs |
| Slipknot Iowa | 2.5 |
| Slipknot Slipknot | 3.5 |
| Slipknot All Hope Is Gone | 3.5 |
| Soulja Boy Souljaboytellem.com | 1.0 |
| Soulja Boy iSouljaBoyTellEm | 1.0 |
| Soundtrack (Disney) The Hunchback of Notre Dame | 4.5 |
| The best Disney movie, with the best Disney villain, and the all-time best Disney song (Hellfire). |
| Testament The Gathering | 2.5 |
| The Beatles 1 | 4.0 |
| The Beatles Revolver | 4.5 |
| The Jimi Hendrix Experience Axis: Bold as Love | 3.0 |
| The Jimi Hendrix Experience Electric Ladyland | 4.0 |
| The Notorious B.I.G. Ready to Die | 5.0 |
| If he's wasn't the best damn rapper period, he certainly had the best flow and released arguably the best hip-hop album of all time. |
| The Smiths Meat Is Murder | 3.0 |
| The Smiths Strangeways, Here We Come | 3.5 |
| The Smiths Rank | 4.0 |
| The Smiths The Smiths | 4.5 |
| The Smiths The Queen Is Dead | 5.0 |
| The crowning moment of The Smiths' career, and a crowning moment of alternative music itself. If you don't love "There is a Light that Never Goes Out", you're not human. |
| The Standards' Station 37 | 3.5 |
| The White Stripes Get Behind Me Satan | 4.0 |
| Toby Keith Shock'n Y'all | 2.5 |
| Tyler, the Creator Bastard | 4.0 |
| Van Halen Van Halen | 4.5 |
| Vinnie Paz Season of the Assassin | 4.0 |
| A welcome change from Vinnie Paz's standard raps about being a half-machine-half-Muslim Christ-killing boxer (although there's still plenty of that), Vinnie has switched to a more traditional from of braggadocio. He also offers his opinions on serious topics and shows his maturity in a way not seen since his verse on "Uncommon Valor". Recommended tracks: End of Days, WarMonger, Same Story (My Dedication). |
| Warning Watching from a Distance | 4.5 |
| Weezer Weezer | 4.0 |
| Weezer Pinkerton | 5.0 |
| Wiz Khalifa Rolling Papers | 1.5 |
| X Japan Art of Life | 5.0 |
| Aptly named, 'Art of Life' covers the full scale of life's emotions in half an hour. Even better, it does it in 9 minutes with the piano solo. |
| XTC Skylarking | 4.5 |
| Whether they're smoking grass, singing about Supergirl, or yelling at God, XTC delivers. |
