| | Full Review | Ratings (346) |
Give your Rating |
| 3.0 good | Shrektacular | December 17th 16 |
hey guys, shrektacular here, today i'll be reviewing stoned by pope mabone. so let's get something out of the way. hip-hop is mysoginist, who cares, it's 2016, get over it. ok on to the review.
pope mabone is a white guy, who cares, get over it. i'd like to say that he sounds like a high angel, supposing there's weed up in heaven. the sort of angel who can do no wrong, but can't hold a decent conversation either. really likes black metal, means deafheaven sort of guy. type of guy to talk a lot about ordering pizza but sort of wait for you to order the thing. if he had more money he'd chip in, he really would, dude's got a good heart. same blurred facebook profile picture, taken at night in the highschool parking lot, hasn't changed it in six years, reposts heartfelt articles about the election and feminism.
i think what hip-hop heads don't understand is boys are sensitive now. he's not a dick, he's just a little insecure, you know, family issues, parents cut him off and kicked him out of the house for getting his little sister into smoking but he's got a good heart, she was stressed out with school and stuff. sorta guy who won't let you call a woman a slut or a dude retarded. admirable guy really, he'll make you breakfast in the morning after half-snuggling with you, what kind of cereal do you like? passes you his bowl whenever without thinking about it. good heart.
i was listening to this record on the way to my nine-to-five the other day, this guy zones me out man, feel like i'm back sitting in my highschool friends room blazed and playing videogames and thinking about some skinny girl with beautiful eyes who had a miyazaki sticker on her laptop and bit her lip when she was thinking, a real caroline polachek type. grimes would not be chill to smoke with, i've thought about this. post malone might smoke you out and just listen, you know, or stare at the wall. can't tell if he's listening or just staring at the wall really. either way i like this guy in the room. sometimes that's all you really want right? a guy to smoke with, who won't clutter up the space with coherent thought. no i'm serious. take a chill pill man. half of everyone's friends are just people to sit in a room with a be a bit less alone with.
27 Bumps | Bump |
| 3.5 great | joshrhodes | December 13th 16 |
Dude you're not The Weeknd calm down
lmao
2 Bumps | Bump |
| 2.0 poor | SmileNerd | December 12th 16 |
Dude you're not The Weeknd calm down
2 Bumps | Bump |
| 3.5 great | Alabaster Jones | December 10th 16 |
Looking back on it, "White Iverson" was a pretty huge and pretty strange song. I mean, here was this goofy-ass kid with cornrows and gold teeth that copped a Future-esque style and an Allen Iverson swagger and become an overnight sensation. August 26th was a bit lukewarm, but it was certainly promising, and Post Malone delivered it just like the mailman himself used to. But we're not talking about the Jazz, we're talking about the clouds, and that's exactly where Stoney makes its home, whether they are airy and just barely there or dense and full to bursting. The constant, hazy, cloudy atmosphere works wonders all throughout the album, and while the lyrics are more or less par for the course save for some quotables here or there, it's hard not to appreciate the singing ability, the ear for great melodies, and the more than adequate flow of one Austin Post. Nice to see his potential beginning to come into form. Early stages, obviously, but shaping up nonetheless.
2 Bumps | Bump |
| 2.6 average | Erwann S. STAFF | September 9th 21 |
You know how everyone was pleased when learning Post Malone likes guitar music? He kinda should stick to that persona. Truly, he's at his best when he's coming up with rock-like choruses ("Congratulations") - or basically when there's a recognizable chorus - not when he's tryna sing some R&B songs with a rap delivery - in these instances, he's bland. He a good singles artist.
Bump |
| 2.0 poor | strawberriesandgravy | September 3rd 17 |
After listening to some of this and some of his interviews, I think we should leave cultural appropriation to...well...nobody.
Bump |
| 3.0 good | alexpclarke | December 11th 16 |
As someone who has paid pretty close attention to Posty's career, I'm really happy with how this came out. I kinda wish he didn't put all his singles on it, but whatever, they definitely don't detract from the album.
Bump |
| 2.0 poor | dihstyle69 | December 10th 16 |
some good autotune melodies and all but that alone can't hide the awful lyrics and the overall lack in quality. he doesn't stand out from the competition in any way. 2
Bump |
| 4.0 excellent | Herbie Chrost | December 10th 16 |
Talk about defying expectations. Helluva lot better than the mixtape
Bump |
| 4.0 excellent | Dogie | December 18th 23 |
| 2.5 average | Xhoven | August 10th 23 |
| 2.5 average | Sarah | August 4th 23 |
| 3.0 good | altmjw | October 8th 22 |
| 4.0 excellent | NyxArc | August 17th 22 |
| 3.0 good | brian | June 21st 22 |
| 1.0 awful | Watch | June 4th 22 |
| 2.5 average | kodama | August 25th 21 |
| 3.5 great | Weyo | December 30th 20 |
| 4.0 excellent | Gian304 | November 15th 20 |
| 3.0 good | Brabiz | November 4th 20 |
| 2.5 average | branm25 | October 31st 20 |
| 4.0 excellent | Nikolas | August 1st 20 |
| 2.0 poor | vult | June 5th 20 |
| 2.5 average | Gillie | April 22nd 20 |
| 2.0 poor | Suyan | February 27th 20 |
| 3.5 great | Xav | January 13th 20 |
| 1.0 awful | rebb | October 25th 19 |
| 3.0 good | BigHans | September 30th 19 |
| 2.5 average | Risodo | September 10th 19 |
| 2.0 poor | Lassie | September 8th 19 |
| 2.5 average | john | August 5th 19 |
| 4.0 excellent | ARDCWE | July 30th 19 |
| 4.5 superb | babb | July 22nd 19 |
| 2.0 poor | JNeu | July 3rd 19 |
| 4.5 superb | nbats | June 8th 19 |
| 2.5 average | dmp3131 | February 26th 19 |
| 3.0 good | STEA | January 26th 19 |
| 1.5 very poor | MAN0 | December 9th 18 |
| 2.5 average | Prole | November 25th 18 |
| 4.0 excellent | Scott | November 10th 18 |
| 2.5 average | dunnope | October 27th 18 |
| 3.0 good | Diachy | October 6th 18 |
| 3.0 good | wonton | September 21st 18 |
| 1.0 awful | JoExo | September 3rd 18 |
| 3.5 great | kbreit | August 4th 18 |
| 2.5 average | Joran | May 2nd 18 |
| 3.0 good | wwf | April 26th 18 |
| 3.0 good | Jeejee | April 20th 18 |
| 4.0 excellent | Tykuo | April 6th 18 |
| 3.5 great | Moraff | March 1st 18 |
| 2.0 poor | Honza | February 11th 18 |
| 2.5 average | Tranqyl | January 15th 18 |
| 2.5 average | Prancer | December 28th 17 |
| 3.5 great | Highz | December 24th 17 |
| 3.0 good | nateiv | December 18th 17 |
| 3.0 good | Rmazer | November 29th 17 |
| 3.0 good | Skoj | October 20th 17 |
| 3.0 good | Shamus248 CONTRIBUTOR | October 4th 17 |
| 2.0 poor | Kurisu | September 16th 17 |
| 3.5 great | slaps | August 4th 17 |
| 2.5 average | lg433 | July 8th 17 |
| 4.0 excellent | Silas | May 7th 17 |
| 4.0 excellent | Shimana | April 7th 17 |
| 3.0 good | ian b. | January 17th 17 |
| 3.0 good | Thibs | January 10th 17 |
| 5.0 classic | expy | January 7th 17 |
| 3.5 great | Brandon | December 30th 16 |
| 2.5 average | Jade | December 20th 16 |
| 2.0 poor | Emo | December 14th 16 |
| 2.5 average | ellagos | December 13th 16 |
| 3.5 great | tellah | December 12th 16 |
| 4.0 excellent | quik40 | December 11th 16 |
| 2.5 average | EJinHD | December 10th 16 |
| 2.5 average | Jordan M. EMERITUS | December 9th 16 |
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