| | Full Review | Ratings (142) |
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| 2.7 average | Erwann S. EMERITUS | November 3rd 22 | Alex Turner's yawn project is competently done and produced, but there isn't any spark oozing from Everything You'd Come to Expect. Arrangements rise together in tasteless climaxes whose epicness is dampened by both Turner's feeble crooner voice and the overall lack of punch.
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| 2.5 average | MeetMeAtBarItalia | July 5th 16 | This record is unremarkable, especially given the attention these guys get. Alex Turner and Miles Kane both proved to be above average songwriters in the past but the romantic affairs they are writing about here are borderline caricatural and offensively dated as they tend to objectify women sometimes... The orchestral arrangements are well thought-out but the melodies are far weaker than on the debut, and the dramatic presentation is not matched by the mundane lyrics. Songs like "Dracula Teeth", "Bad Habits" and "She Does the Woods" are nearly ridiculous... Fortunately, the two numbers Turner wrote about his current girlfriend are genuine, heartfelt and beautiful love songs : the propulsive "Sweet Dreams, TN" and tender closer "The Dream Synopsis" show the potential still hidden under the bland surface of the rest of the songs. They are better than that...
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| 3.0 good | SalteyBacon | April 14th 16 | One track flows right into the next one. Nothing standout, but nothing was a disappointment. Could have been so much better.
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| 2.5 average | eaglefan1998 | April 2nd 16 | this is pratty damn disappointing, it's just pretty boring and does nothing that The Age Of The Understatement didn't do better
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| 3.5 great | Ledgy | April 11th 23 |
| 3.9 excellent | Rowan5215 EMERITUS | September 3rd 22 |
| 3.0 good | BoerK | October 18th 21 |
| 2.5 average | Sowing STAFF | May 11th 20 |
| 4.5 superb | Eva | May 7th 20 |
| 3.5 great | wg98 | December 23rd 19 |
| 2.5 average | iGuter | December 17th 19 |
| 4.0 excellent | cruzz17 | October 29th 19 |
| 1.5 very poor | FakeOne | September 17th 19 |
| 3.0 good | aoh21 | September 15th 19 |
| 2.5 average | Juanpa | August 19th 19 |
| 2.5 average | Marci | September 28th 18 |
| 5.0 classic | Eden | May 12th 18 |
| 2.5 average | ABond | May 9th 18 |
| 2.5 average | 17aa18 | March 12th 18 |
| 2.0 poor | jimbo | October 22nd 17 |
| 3.0 good | Prole | September 5th 17 |
| 4.0 excellent | RyRd | March 2nd 17 |
| 2.0 poor | ktmq | February 26th 17 |
| 4.5 superb | eazye | August 2nd 16 |
| 3.5 great | Tim00w | April 12th 16 |
| 3.0 good | Adam | April 6th 16 |
| 3.0 good | Irving EMERITUS | April 6th 16 |
| 4.0 excellent | BHAR | April 2nd 16 |
| 4.0 excellent | oahmed | April 1st 16 |
| 4.5 superb | ti0n | March 29th 16 |
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