Review Summary: look! guts!
thursday the 22rd of june late evening. the hungover feeling of a good midweek ended. slivers of indifferent night-time in my iris. click-click-click boredom taking me in a convoluted way towards
pure misery by a band called humour. spotify doesn't pay artists enough; as an """artist""" myself i know this well but it's UI has showed me some things i really like so really it's swings/roundabouts, peaks/valleys, corporate greed/accessibility. i'm not in love with the modern world.
within the first five seconds of listening to
yeah, mud i know i'm sold. on my life i cannot escape the allure of guitar music -- especially when it's driven by everything but the guitars. and it's noisy. and the singer is mostly just doing this unhinged squeal-shouting which sounds just like the ohm of the average human brain. the microwave hum of nervousness.
friday the 23rd of june i forget all those other songs and i'm driving home late. i'm sorry i forgot to get you a birthday present and that i forgot to respond to the message you sent me last week. please know i'm being sincere because i really am thankful for you and i know how it feels when someone does the same thing to me. there's a lot of things i want to say to so many different people but i can't just yet so i will start with you because it feels like you might get it. the chords that ground the title track sound like blisters. HELLO I GOTTA TELL YOU SOMETHING. desperation sticks in your head. pure misery comes off like a joke at times...sorry,
pure misery comes off like a joke at times*. it's so dark and evil sounding but one friend that i showed the EP to said "this is hilarious" and i can't disagree. i look at myself and think along those same lines, mainly on days that end in 'y'. i go to the pub and think
"what's wrong with my jeans?". but no one even accused me of slacking on the denim front.
i think his name's andreas. i wanna say i got that from a youtube comment. oh wait of course the band is called humour. we're all doing it wrong and it's really funny. how do you spell schaudenfrau-..schaedenfrued-...schadenfreude?? that's why it's so hard to fix. will i feel better about the breathless volatility of having to wake up every single morning if i take it seriously or if i go along with those optimistic nihilists? you are going to be so disappointed in me.
saturday the 24th of june busy day but nothing goes wrong. i strum my guitar on stage and then i stay behind to help out behind the scenes. everyone is being so nice to me and i wish they'd stop for a minute. not their fault. i expected more of you but, removed from that, i expected more of myself. i take itinerary of all the threads i've been meaning to pull tight in the homejob crocheted rug that is my life and realise there's holes that are too big to repair unless i just start again. not my fault. i'm going to make people roll their eyes at the mention of my name occasionally, and if that's just because i'm friends with someone they hate then all i can do is laugh in response. i stuff the barrel of my gun with levity. i listen to bands that sound like other bands and love them more than said other bands for reasons even a more articulate version of me wouldn't be able to justify. being a people pleaser is exhausting -- especially if you aren't any good at it.
in an impressionistic kind of way
pure misery is a deformed celebration of limitation. its universe is not only one where perfection is unattainable, but one where perfection doesn't even exist as an abstract notion. it is utterly devoid of grace and that is where its humour is derived. in this universe i do not compare myself to other people because everybody has their ugliness on display. i may as well be ugly and awkward in a way that can't be explained with a pithy reference.
sunday 25th of june no signal please check the input connection. the fire isn't roaring; it is whispering. board games. breakfast with a stranger. sixteen years in half a week. nothing but
pure misery. misery as a hyphen in between more positive descriptors. it's all there at the same time. I WAS SO CONFUSED, I COULDN'T UNDERSTAND IT. of course the band is called humour. of course it is
