Darko (US)
Oni


3.0
good

Review

by pizzamachine USER (635 Reviews)
October 3rd, 2022 | 163 replies


Release Date: 2022 | Tracklist

Review Summary: Truly a unique flavour!

Darko (US) Recipe Book

Page 1: Oni Muffins

Ingredients:
• 1 Cup: sci-fi effects from Rings of Saturn
• 2 Cups: growls from Brand of Sacrifice
• 2 Cups: zaniness of Berried Alive
• 5 Teaspoons: obnoxiousness from above bands (citations needed)

Other Ingredients:
• 1 Guitar
• 1 Drum set
• Half a teaspoon of clean vocals

Instructions:
Mix the top ingredients in one large bowl thoroughly. Use a separate bowl for the guitar and drum set, and make sure to mash the guitar until the pieces go everywhere and it overtakes the mix. When done dump all ingredients into a mixing bowl and stir it until your arms fall off, or use an electric mixer until it breaks. Bake for twenty hours in the oven with it open - add 2 litres of gasoline for potency. Wait until muffins are overdone and burnt. Look for the oven to be a bright red as the house explodes and kills the neighbours.

Baker’s Note:
This is my son’s favourite recipe, he’s 17 years old. He says there’s nothing quite like it. He lives in the psych ward but he’s a happy fella. He made this recipe.

Review of Oni Muffins by SputnikMuffin:

First of all, people died in the making of these muffins and it is a tragedy. I don’t know why I was asked to do this review because it is frankly insulting. Clearly it had a detrimental, but potent effect to the lives of humans. I heard the muffins smelled nice, but whoever said that is not right in the head, to be blunt. Conclusion: 1/5.



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user ratings (129)
3.5
great


Comments:Add a Comment 
Vinnymcscoop
October 4th 2022


1672 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

Thanks Ill add this with my chicken quesadillas in my recipe book

kevbogz
October 4th 2022


6164 Comments


beginning of dragon chaser ripped off the end of veil of maya's punisher. whack

rc239
October 4th 2022


417 Comments

Album Rating: 3.0

This album is so cheesy and fun lmao

metalprofiteer
October 4th 2022


62 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

album is easily a 4.5

mkmusic1995
Contributing Reviewer
October 4th 2022


2030 Comments

Album Rating: 2.5 | Sound Off

Love it! Not the album, but the review I love!

dndukes
October 4th 2022


7 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

This album is easily in my top 5 best albums of the year. It might actually be AOTY when it is all said and done. GREAT STUFF HERE!

g40st
October 8th 2022


917 Comments


Had never even heard of this band until I saw that Russian YouTube drummer chick kicking the shit outta that bass drum

SaveBandit
October 8th 2022


3358 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

Gotta revisit this soon. Kinda have to be in a specific mood ya know?

sspedding
October 10th 2022


5724 Comments

Album Rating: 3.5

The slower songs are the biz on this

Vinnymcscoop
October 10th 2022


1672 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

The slower songs kinda hold up the album real well

NudeTayne
October 13th 2022


1115 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

The slower songs are a got dang snoozefest

Vinnymcscoop
October 13th 2022


1672 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

Good, snoozefest, whatever

NudeTayne
October 13th 2022


1115 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

Except for Looking Glass. That song fucks.

Vinnymcscoop
October 13th 2022


1672 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

Glad you liked it, the album was a step up for them on song writing

NudeTayne
October 14th 2022


1115 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

Oh I'm in love with the album. I just feel like Frankie's influence rubbed off on Josh a little too much with the slower songs (Infinite Beauty, Come home), and "Oni" feels completely off. Even the clean singing sounds like Frankie trying to sing. The rest of the album feels much more focused and conceptual.

Vinnymcscoop
November 10th 2022


1672 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

I really must have shit taste, because I thought "Exodus" was awesome

Vinnymcscoop
November 10th 2022


1672 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

Oh, cool. I loved Lifeblood, so I'm pretty pumped for the album to drop

sspedding
November 10th 2022


5724 Comments

Album Rating: 3.5

That new Brand of Sacrifice track is laughably shit

NudeTayne
November 23rd 2022


1115 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

crazy I haven't seen an Acid Inject mention, that shit'll make you wanna slap your mama

NudeTayne
November 24th 2022


1115 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

The dancing werewolves make me cheese it every time



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