Static Dress
Rouge Carpet Disaster


4.5
superb

Review

by Jake E. USER (3 Reviews)
May 19th, 2022 | 1075 replies


Release Date: 05/18/2022 | Tracklist

Review Summary: a delicate red

Every once in awhile, a new band comes along that raises the eyebrow of music fans. A band that has the ability to set new standards for a particular genre. Many have come and gone, few have left their mark. A glimmer of potential, squandered by their own hand. Even fewer have the ability to connect with an individual's personal self. Many adults reach an inevitable crisis at some point of their lives, longing for the memories of being a kid again without a care in the world except for what show was going to be on Cartoon Network that day, what time after school your friends would get together and cause mischief to the establishment, and most importantly, connecting with the music of the time. Nostalgia can be a dangerous drug, but it can also bring back those certain feelings where the weight of the world just seems to be lifted from our shoulders, even as a simple brief respite. With all that being said, if you ever find yourself missing the mid 2000's emocore scene, Static Dress are here to bring you back to your Myspace days.

Fans of the They're Only Chasing Safety era of former legendary turned midlife-crisis-core band Underoath will rejoice, as Static Dress have seemingly perfected their craft and may even surpass them in due time. This impression mostly lies within the sheer charisma and talent of vocalist Olli Appleyard. Appleyard is an absolute force to be reckoned with behind the microphone, as he utilizes a variety of impressive tactics ranging from shrill, ear piercing shrieks to soaring, melodic clean choruses that just radiate mid 2000's nostalgia. The rest of the band follows suit in the instrumental department. Their mysterious, faceless guitarist simply known as Contrast knows how to craft catchy melodies and energetic chord progressions that shine over the precise drumming of Aaron Gillespie lookalike Sam Ogden, as well as the slick bass and backup vocals by the man who is never seen without a black beanie on, Connor Reilly. These lads from Leeds are the torchbearers of the modern post-hardcore scene, and they are here to prove themselves worthy of being the next breakthrough act in music today.

Since teasing a fair amount of singles over the past few years and making a huge impact with their first single "clean." all the way back in 2019, Static Dress have certainly been busy since then. Release after release, the anticipation for a full length album was increasing at such an exponential rate to the point where our inner emo kids unanimously came together to proclaim that yes, this band has the "it" factor.

Now, Static Dress is not a linear band by any means. Instead of taking the easy route and being "just another group of guys that write songs" the band has built a reputation on being mysterious and unpredictable. Teasing cryptic messages in their songs, website, and even live shows the band has created their own "world" based around their mysterious nature. All of these clues, puzzles, and the band's general demeanor made them stand out even more as something truly unique. The hype was building, the tension and anxiety was rising. Through all the trials and tribulations, Static Dress have finally brought their image full circle, and revealed to the world their mastercraft debut Rouge Carpet Disaster. Produced by close friend of the band Erik Bickerstaffe (of Loathe fame) this group of gentlemen has the makings of a modern classic.

The band wastes absolutely no time making their presence known, as "fleahouse" explodes out of the gate with blistering intensity. A gripping scream by Appleyard rings out into Contrast's colorful guitarwork and Sam's fantastic drumwork. Their yin and yang of combining powerful, heartfelt melodies and noisy, ear piercing heaviness is a certain kind of chemistry that not many bands can achieve. Acting as a cohesive journey from start to finish, Rouge Carpet Disaster is a meticulously thought out journey with satisfying transitions. As "fleahouse" bleeds into lead single "sweet." and bouncy "Push rope" the enamor of Appleyard's hooks remain so consistently catchy, emotional, and memorable you can't help but sing and scream along with him. His clever lyrical metaphors are also worthy of praise. "Were we just a passing phase, like cigarettes in movie scenes?"

The album weaves in and out, constructed carefully like a puzzle just waiting to be cracked. The mellow, quiet, crooning nature of "attempt 8" showcases the band's ability to write a lighter song that tugs on the heart strings. But just when you think they've gone soft a mere 4 songs in, "Courtney, just relax" will shut up anyone's doubts. When Olli tells you to "TAKE A SEAT!" you listen. "Courtney" proves to be the heaviest, noisiest cut on the album next to the following track, second single "Di-sinTer." This song showcases all of the band's best elements, a shapeshifter that blossoms from loud, noisy, and claustrophobic to quiet, subdued and heartfelt. No sign of slowing down from here, as the latter half rivals the first half. "such.a.shame" the third single, has undoubtedly the catchiest chorus on the entire album. "I think that I moved on too soon. Just left here with my thoughts gripped on losing you." Appleyard's hooks will undoubtedly catch your ear with ease. Moving on, the anthemic "Lye solution" is another track worthy of praise. This particular gem has Underoath written all over it, seemingly a tribute to the band directly. As the journey unfolds into the penultimate track "marisol" we get to hear what love sounds like. Gorgeous would be an understatement, this track will make you feel as though you're floating above the atmosphere, laying back on a cloud and watching as the world passes by below you. With the conclusion of "marisol" the bitter end draws near. Closing track "cubicle dialogue" offically cements the band's legacy as the torchbearers of modern emocore. A catchy acoustic intro riff develops into their trademark post-hardcore excellence, a culmination of all the band's finest elements in one neat package. Rouge Carpet Disaster proves to be the ultimate statement that the band is trying to make, that this is merely the beginning for them. "Why would I stop now?"

In conclusion, Static Dress is quite simply the future of post-hardcore. They have everything a fan of this genre could possibly want, and more. Rouge Carpet Disaster is a special experience that will bring back some of those childhood memories we all long for, and make you somewhat hopeful that there are still beautiful things left in this world. If you're sick and tired of the state of modernity and wish to return to 2005 for a day, lend Static Dress your ear. You may be pleasantly surprised. Rouge Carpet Disaster is far from a disaster, its a definitive statement that proves their journey has only just begun, and that they are on a clear path to a long, prosperous future ahead.


user ratings (273)
4
excellent


Comments:Add a Comment 
JayEnder
May 19th 2022


16285 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

Couple addendums:



- First off, yes this is a redux of my Prologue review which I had nuked for personal reasons. So it may look familiar to some. More importantly, I want to give a HUGE shoutout to the homie tyman128 for helping me proofread and clean this up. He's a great dude and provided me a lot of necessary constructive criticism! Also this will most likely be my last review on the site, as it is a really stressful process for me especially for a release that means this much to me.



- Second off, this band rules and I really hope you guys connect with them the same way I have. Be sure to check their standalone singles as well. Looking forward to discussing this one, but right now I'm going to BED.

cloakanddagger
May 19th 2022


614 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

Good review, I haven't heard this album just yet but the guitarist in my band has been hyping these guys a lot recently so I need to give it a spin at some point.

Rowan5215
Staff Reviewer
May 19th 2022


47049 Comments

Album Rating: 3.7

album rips, the ending of Lye Solution is nasty



shame to hear you won't keep reviewing man. I enjoy reading your stuff but also definitely understand the stressfulness of it lmao

parksungjoon
May 19th 2022


45110 Comments


definitely understand the stressfulness of it lmao [2]

pos'd

MyColdShoulder
May 19th 2022


483 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

Banger review Jay, and I agree with everything said here. Album rules hard



Sad to see that you're deciding not to write here anymore, but I get it. Gotta do what's best for yourself

SteakByrnes
May 19th 2022


28248 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

Nice review Jay, it did feel like I'd read this before but then I read your comment and it makes more sense lol. I feel you on the stress of reviewing, whenever I tried to get back into it it was always a hassle that I just didn't wanna deal with, hence my 1 review lol



Album is a very fun nostalgic jam, Courtney is a ripper

Durrzo
May 19th 2022


2827 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

Strong review to go out on if it's gonna be your last.

Album rules, may grow on me even more with time. Really enjoy both sides of this band as well. Attempt 8 is such a soothing vibe of a track, then they slap you in the face with Courtney. They're good at everything.

bigweinerdon
May 19th 2022


2409 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

Great review. Vibes are divine on this album

JeetJeet
May 19th 2022


11700 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

Awesome review fam. Pos'd. Awesome album too.

lg433
May 19th 2022


79 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

album slaps

tyman128
Contributing Reviewer
May 19th 2022


3845 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

glad I could help you out with this! sad to see itโ€™s your final review most likely, but what a way to go out brother l

great album to, absolutely love Marisol

pjquinones747
May 19th 2022


3941 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

Album good. Band is hype rn

onionbubs
May 19th 2022


16528 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

i prob wont be able to check this til monday but i am hyped af for it



great review too my man. i totally feel u when it comes to reviewing tho. i stopped like 2 years ago its a really draining process for me as well

JesperL
Staff Reviewer
May 19th 2022


4864 Comments

Album Rating: 3.7

wonderful review boi!

this is better than voyeurist fs

JayEnder
May 19th 2022


16285 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

Thank you guys very much for your kind words! I was so nervous about this review and the album in general, glad to have this weight off my shoulders and can enjoy it to its full potential haha.



Another review isn't entirely out of the question, but I need to be really motivated and passionate about whatever that album may be. Been under a lot of stress lately. Might tackle the new Counterparts album later this year, or Static Dress's next album whenever that may be, who knows ๐Ÿ˜‰

Purpl3Spartan
May 19th 2022


6045 Comments

Album Rating: 3.5

Stellar review homie

Slex
May 19th 2022


15244 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

Well deserved feature



Album rips

nash1311
May 19th 2022


5267 Comments

Album Rating: 3.5

Not loving this as much as originally anticipated

RadioSuicide
May 19th 2022


2254 Comments

Album Rating: 3.5

i don't really go for stuff like this anymore but the deftones and underoath vibes are sweee

TheTripP
May 19th 2022


4259 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

oh let's go I am excited af for this!





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