Review Summary: A fabulous classic rock epic.
If there is one word that can describe the almighty Led Zeppelin, it is "fabulous." While the word often has a different connotation now, one might need to refer to the Webster's dictionary for a refresher on the word. You will most likely find a picture of Led Zeppelin. See them now? The golden God, the guitar wizard, the jack of all trades, and the carpenter. If the world of rock was an unsuspecting tribe, then Led Zeppelin are like the British versions of Christopher Columbus if he was actually four people. Historical records are often unclear, so it is possible Columbus was four people, but we definitely know the history of Led Zeppelin. Their mark on the world has been epic and iconic.
1. Whole Lotta Love - An epic blues track, you can sense the sexiness of Robert Plant right away. The riff is iconic. There is a psychedelic section in the middle of the song meant to mimic the sounds of sexual intercourse and orgasms. They didn't even have to do that, because the lyrics are very clearly about sexual pleasures and ejaculation, but the interlude really drives it home. Experimental
and sexy - this is the magic (or magick) of Led Zeppelin. Crowley would be proud to hear this celebration of sexual intercourse. Iconic track. 5/5
2. What Is And What Should Never Be - Another iconic track, this song turns down the volume a bit, albeit deceptively so. Listen on if you dare. Robert Plant lulls you into a state of comforted complacency, almost as if his voice is sexual heroin shot straight into your penile veins. But not so fast, listeners. Keep listening. The crazy drums and crazy bass come in and we are sent on a one way ticket to rock and roll city. Another iconic jam from the boys of Led Zeppelin. 5/5
3. The Lemon Song - Back to 11, actually, this is turned up to 12, making Spinal Tap sound more like Milli Vanilli. This song has such bluesy grooves and such feel that one can almost believe we are listening to actual black people singing about hanging out at the train tracks in 1930. A celebration of black heritage, Led Zeppelin gave the bluesy grooves to the world like no other before or since. More sexual lyrics here, although they are more sensual. Beavis and Butthead this is not. Joyce-ian sexuality is celebrated and explored, keeping up the theme of sexual explorers coming to take over the new world with their music and penises. Iconic. 5/5
4. Thank You - This is the track where Led Zeppelin show their sensitive sides. While still an ode to love, it is beyond the bedroom. This song makes you think of getting married and things like that. Many weddings have played this song, and it is for good reason - it is simply too iconic to deny. Plant's vocals are gorgeous, Page plays guitar tastefully like a minimalist painter given magical powers, and Jones and Bonham hold down the fort with their iconic grooves. An epic track. 5/5
5. Heartbreaker - Back to the blues, we have another hit classic. This is heavy, this is raw, this is sexy, this is fabulous, this is iconic, this is epic. The lyrics describe the aftermath after the honeymoon phase of Thank You is over. Plant is pissed, to put it bluntly. He has been cheated on by a loose woman with loose morals. Page channels the anger one feels when being cheated on with his crazy guitar playing. While the 1930s bluesmen are not known for shredding, Page takes the basic foundation of the blues and adds shredding. You can tell guitarists like Slash, Buckethead, and Dimebag studied the epic solo. 5/5
6. Living Loving Maid - A song we all know and love, another iconic hit classic. This has groove, this has feel, this brings vibes of driving around in a car and living your life. The anger of Heartbraker has subsided and Plant reminds us all that "she's just a woman," which is a good attitude for a broken heart. Move on. Live your life. Be like Led Zeppelin. 5/5
7. Ramble On - It is no secret that the members of Led Zeppelin were some of the most well read rock n rollers of their era. When they were not doing drugs or having sex, they would often be found reading books. This has been well documented, and it shows in their songs. Ramble On describes Lord of the Rings, but without Elven language and so on. Some would say it is dumbed down for the layman, but the real "lay" man is the members of Led Zeppelin. This song has awesome acoustic guitar, an iconic chorus, and is just an all around classic track. It is hard to deny the power of Led zeppelin. They brought Tolkien's message to the working class of Great Britain and USA. 5/5
8. Moby Dick - Another literary reference, Jimmy Page read Melville right alongside titans such as Crowley and Tolkien. The message is so clear that the song does not even need words. In one sense, John Bonham himself represents the whale, and we the listeners are Ahab, constantly searching for what we need. If you find me rocking out to this iconic track, please don't call me Ishmael, because I'm too busy rocking out to talk to you. John Bonham plays a solo that immediately eclipses anything Joey Jordan or other drummers are capable of. 5/5
9. Bring It On Home - Now y'all knew Led Zeppelin could not finish
Led Zeppelin II without another iconic blues anthem. This song masters dynamics and juxtaposition, ranging from soft to hard, another sexual metaphor both lyrically and sonically. Plant brings to mind images of the Blues Brothers themselves, studying the black masters and bringing the heritage to a new audience on Saturday Night Live. This song is great. 5/5
As you can see, all songs are 5 star. Listening to this album is quite literally like staying at the finest hotel or dining at the finest eatery. If Sputnikmusic allowed just one 6 star rating, it would surely go to this gargantuan mammoth of a blues rock masterpiece. Fabulous, indeed, and a proper send-off for the 60s. The new world has been discovered, and it is Led Zeppelin's.
