Corey Taylor
CMFT


3.5
great

Review

by SowingSeason STAFF
October 5th, 2020 | 229 replies


Release Date: 10/02/2020 | Tracklist

Review Summary: A ton of fun if you don’t overanalyze music while vigorously stroking your neck beard.

CMFT is pointless. It’s artistically and creatively barren, borrowing all of its ideas from classic rock bands who did it better. The album is a prolonged identity crisis, stumbling into everything from country and blues to hip-hop and punk. Its choruses are bright and energetic, but devoid of true meaning. Taylor belts out clichés while vapidly rebelling against nothing in particular. The whole thing almost plays out like a parody of Kiss meets AC/DC, except nothing is novel – much less humorous – about Corey Taylor’s approach. It’s just cock rock to get annihilated to on a Saturday night at a frat house where the air is vomit-tinged and the floor is always sticky.

You know what else was a pointless album that exhibited nearly all the same traits? Andrew W.K.’s I Get Wet. And you love that album, unless you’re a ***ing liar.

This is admittedly (a lot) less fun, but the general idea is the same: objectively bad music can still be a hell of a good time if it accepts its role. At no point in “CMFT Must Be Stopped” are we meant to take anything seriously, and the same thing sort of applies to all of CMFT. It’s a party rock album, designed to serve little purpose outside of drunken nights and lead-footed highway drives (not at the same time!). It wasn’t crafted with fans of Slipknot or Stone Sour in mind; it’s an album that middle-aged dads will enjoy unironically and that their kids will make fun of relentlessly. In that way, it’s fun for the whole family…sort of.

Musically, this is very surface-level. The riffs are flimsy but memorable, the drumming will keep the energy level high yet never impress, and the infectious choruses almost always arrive prematurely. Corey Taylor’s dark emotional croons and scathing growls have been replaced by a softer touch which allows the melodies to soar. I cannot reiterate strongly enough just how much this album sounds like every stadium rock stereotype ever imagined tossed into a blender. If you’re looking for ingenuity, passion, or sheer grit, look anywhere else. If you’re looking for a mindless romp in the hay with anthemic commercial rock, then I’ve got your hookup right here.

So what exactly is CMFT? It’s a bad album, I guess. It’s also a ton of fun if you don’t overanalyze music while vigorously stroking your neck beard. Corey Taylor has crafted a no-frills, carefree collection of party rock tunes that, at worst, offer nothing inventive or deep but at best will give you an adrenaline rush at 2 a.m. when you’re out with your buddies getting trashed and forgetting that 2020 ever happened. You can decide whether or not that’s enough to justify CMFT’s existence – a guilty pleasure album that’s hard to take seriously, but equally as difficult to resist.



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user ratings (103)
2
poor


Comments:Add a Comment 
SowingSeason
Moderator
October 5th 2020


36220 Comments

Album Rating: 3.5

This is objectively the worst review I've ever written, but it's okay because I had fun doing it.

Digging: Phoebe Bridgers - If We Make It Through December

SteakByrnes
October 5th 2020


21523 Comments


no way this is above a 1.5

Digging: Palm Reader - Sleepless

WalrusTusk
October 5th 2020


363 Comments


^For those of you that don't want to read the review, here's a summary of the album.

Storm In A Teacup
October 5th 2020


30797 Comments

Album Rating: 2.5

Oh snaps it’s like reading my own thoughts

SowingSeason
Moderator
October 5th 2020


36220 Comments

Album Rating: 3.5

I couldn't decide between a 1 and a 5 so I gave it a 3.5. How does that sit with you?

SowingSeason
Moderator
October 5th 2020


36220 Comments

Album Rating: 3.5

Also this isn't nearly as good as Poppy if that measure of perspective makes everyone feel better.

Storm In A Teacup
October 5th 2020


30797 Comments

Album Rating: 2.5

Scores don’t matter as much as turning your brain off to enjoy shitty music does.

SowingSeason
Moderator
October 5th 2020


36220 Comments

Album Rating: 3.5

Yeah this is very much a mindlessly enjoyable record.

ramon.
October 5th 2020


3759 Comments


This review is brought to you by RAID: Shadow Legends

Lord(e)Po)))ts
October 5th 2020


62294 Comments


Thought for sure this would be a Simon review

Digging: MYSS KETA - IL CIELO NON E UN LIMITE

SowingSeason
Moderator
October 5th 2020


36220 Comments

Album Rating: 3.5

Words fail. Ratings fail.



(Reviews fail.)

DDDeftoneDDD
October 5th 2020


14443 Comments


I will probably listen to this and give a low rate while stroking my beard. Tks for that Sow!

Digging: Ultimate Spinach - Ultimate Spinach

SowingSeason
Moderator
October 5th 2020


36220 Comments

Album Rating: 3.5

I am normally said neckbeard from summary but this album transcends all. It showed me the way.

bloc
October 5th 2020


64101 Comments


Been waiting for this album. I'm kinda excited to hear it

Digging: Big Kahuna OG and Monday Night - Thug Tear

Pikazilla
October 5th 2020


13267 Comments


This is on the same level of cringe as iowa and wanyk tbh

Lord(e)Po)))ts
October 5th 2020


62294 Comments


this is exponentially more cringe than iowa and wanyk based off the video for CMFT Must Be Stopped Alone

And I'm not saying those aren't cringe

LunaticSoul
October 5th 2020


1520 Comments


this is your best review

also the single sucked, no way I'm listening to this

LunaticSoul
October 5th 2020


1520 Comments


ah yeah, he also said this is more inspired than stone sour/slipknot

lol corey fo real

he might deserve some hard neckbeard stroking for that statement

SowingSeason
Moderator
October 5th 2020


36220 Comments

Album Rating: 3.5

Well whether he intended it or not this is a great party rock album that will inspire nothing (maybe more shots)

Lord(e)Po)))ts
October 5th 2020


62294 Comments


In terms of cringe severity - from least to most - it goes:

Slipknot
Stone Sour
Corey Taylor

for reference Slipknot is 8/10 on the cringe spectrum



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