Review Summary: A ton of fun if you don’t overanalyze music while vigorously stroking your neck beard.CMFT
is pointless. It’s artistically and creatively barren, borrowing all of its ideas from classic rock bands who did it better. The album is a prolonged identity crisis, stumbling into everything from country and blues to hip-hop and punk. Its choruses are bright and energetic, but devoid of true meaning. Taylor belts out clichés while vapidly rebelling against nothing in particular. The whole thing almost plays out like a parody of Kiss meets AC/DC, except nothing is novel – much less humorous – about Corey Taylor’s approach. It’s just cock rock to get annihilated to on a Saturday night at a frat house where the air is vomit-tinged and the floor is always sticky.
You know what else was a pointless album that exhibited nearly all the same traits? Andrew W.K.’s I Get Wet
. And you love that album, unless you’re a ***ing liar.
This is admittedly (a lot) less fun, but the general idea is the same: objectively bad music can still be a hell of a good time if it accepts its role. At no point in “CMFT Must Be Stopped” are we meant to take anything seriously, and the same thing sort of applies to all of CMFT
. It’s a party rock album, designed to serve little purpose outside of drunken nights and lead-footed highway drives (not at the same time!). It wasn’t crafted with fans of Slipknot or Stone Sour in mind; it’s an album that middle-aged dads will enjoy unironically and that their kids will make fun of relentlessly. In that way, it’s fun for the whole family…sort of.
Musically, this is very surface-level. The riffs are flimsy but memorable, the drumming will keep the energy level high yet never impress, and the infectious choruses almost always arrive prematurely. Corey Taylor’s dark emotional croons and scathing growls have been replaced by a softer touch which allows the melodies to soar. I cannot reiterate strongly enough just how much this album sounds like every stadium rock stereotype ever imagined tossed into a blender. If you’re looking for ingenuity, passion, or sheer grit, look anywhere else. If you’re looking for a mindless romp in the hay with anthemic commercial rock, then I’ve got your hookup right here.
So what exactly is CMFT
? It’s a bad album, I guess. It’s also a ton of fun if you don’t overanalyze music while vigorously stroking your neck beard. Corey Taylor has crafted a no-frills, carefree collection of party rock tunes that, at worst, offer nothing inventive or deep but at best will give you an adrenaline rush at 2 a.m. when you’re out with your buddies getting trashed and forgetting that 2020 ever happened. You can decide whether or not that’s enough to justify CMFT
’s existence – a guilty pleasure album that’s hard to take seriously, but equally as difficult to resist.