Review Summary: With the album having such a heavy background to it, its of no surprise that your first few listens will be listened to with that story in a mind. But we have all dealt with tragedy in our lives, most of all of us have lost someone close to them. These so
Imagine losing someone so close to you that a big part of your life was affiliated with them. Imagine if it was sudden, unexpected, and shook your core. That was what happened to co-front man Mike Shinoda when Linkin Park's Chester Bennington tragically lost his battle with depression last year. Mike was faced with a very large part of his world shaken and coming unglued when Chester passed. Mike is also a very artistically oriented person, and when tragedy struck he took to painting and writing songs to process his grief and work through the emotions he was feeling. This album is the resulted of those writing sessions, and shows the unbalanced and destroyed mind of someone who lost one of their best friends, and it sure does cover all the stages of grief; those being shock or disbelief, denial, bargaining, guilt, anger, depression, and acceptance/hope. This album has all of those, and just like real life, they don't follow that order as it stays true to Mike's personal feelings. The album began as a 3 song EP that Shinoda released a couple months after Chester's passing, which are the first three tracks on the album. After that, he decided he needed more to attempt closure, and wrote a full length. This album is an emotional rollercoaster, and while its hard to listen to sometimes; it is also something that needs to be listened to, explored, and can be heart breaking and provide emotional clarity at the same time. Its beautiful and haunting all at once.
The first song, 'A Place To Start' sets the mood nicely, and is one of a soft and somber questioning of how could this happen and where does one move on from such a tragedy when their mind is a complete mess as result. The song, like many on this album, is lyrically heart breaking as Shinoda questions life and its fallibility: "Cause I'm tired of the fear that I can't control this, I'm tired of feeling like every next step's hopeless, I'm tired of being scared what I build might break apart, I don't want to know the end, all I want is a place to start" and the song fades into actual voicemails friends left him wishing him condolences in the wake of Chester's death. The song, and the voicemails especially, hit you hard and are a very rattling start to the album while Mike sings in a soft, low register voice that works very well for him.. The second track on the album, 'Over Again', was a personal favorite of mine on the EP and still ranks high for me on the album. This is the anger stage of the album, as we are shown his feelings of raw emotion when it feels like saying goodbye is a constant thing with no end. The song deals with how much of an emotional blow the Hollywood Bowl tribute show was, and how he almost lost it during the show multiple times. He also faces the anger over being constantly reminded of how this effects him and how closure seems impossible, as he states: "I almost lost it in middle of a couple songs. And everybody that I talk to is like, 'wow Must be really hard to figure what to do now' Well thank you genius, you think it'll be a challenge? Only my life's work hanging in the ***ing balance. And all I wanted was to get a little bit of closure. And every step I took I looked and wasn't any closer 'Cause sometimes when you say goodbye, yeah you say it, Over and over and over and over" in some of the most passionate/angry rapping and singing in my mind that I have ever heard from Mike Shinoda.
I could go track by track and point out all of the hard hitting emotion filled lyrics on this album, but I won't; it would take a lot longer than any of you care to read and I also believe that it would ruin the impact of hearing the songs for yourself. I wanted to bring a few to attention though, just to show how much raw emotion this album has. The thing about this album is that while there are a lot of powerful, deep cutting emotions; this doesn't keep the album from being catchy, slightly poppy, and anthemic with its choruses. 'Nothing Makes Sense Anymore' deals with the amount of turmoil loss can cause in someone's life and how unsure it has made Mike, 'About You', which deals with how every song reminds Mike of Chester even unintentionally, 'Promises I Can't Keep' which deals Mike having to face carrying on without Chester in a life he had promised to be by his side, 'Hold It Together' which deals with him trying to keep his emotions together for his wife and family, and how the situation is brought up to him at random moments in life (such as a child's birthday party) and he has to hold it together...all of these songs are extremely powerful and yet the choruses are complete ear worms that will be stuck in your head and have you singing along. There are a lot of songs like that on this album. Its dark, and yet there is a sense of hope and light to it. It's heart breaking, but there is also a sense of fun. Mike Shinoda has managed to incorporate all of his talents into his grief as he explores his personal loss with this album. Chester isn't named by name in the songs but his touch on Mike's life is all over every song on the 16 track album. 'Ghosts' and 'Make It Up As I Go' are two more songs that deal with the heaviness of being haunted by the loss of a friend and having everything you thought was true torn from you; and trying to move forward in the uncertainty of it all which is another theme on the album: the unknown future, and while it seems impossible and the hardest thing imaginable, Mike is trying his very best to do it. 'Running From My Shadow' and 'World's On Fire' are two very powerful songs that deal with the shadow of loss and friendship surrounding your life no matter how much you try to escape it; and sometimes that can be something you need.
Musically this is a very interesting album. Through his grieving process, Mike uses a lot of influences from all of his past works. You can hear sounds from Linkin Park, from Fort Minor, and his past solo works all mixed into one. There is also a lot different, as Mike seems to be exploring and branching out working with composition that is fitting with what he is feeling. The songs have just as many nuanced components and powerful sounds as the lyrics. Some of the songs are filled with awesome beats, hefty sound effects and cool techno and electronica vibes. Others are filled with somber, ambient sounds that draw you into the beat of the song. Some are restrained, some are explosive; but they are catchy, poppy, powerful, dark, and everything in between. You really can hear all of the stages of grief through all of these songs, and it makes for an emotional ride for anyone who listens to it; especially if you were a fan of Linkin Park or if Chester's death hit you hard like it did many in the music world. Even if you weren't a fan of Linkin Park, this album begs to be listened to at least once for you to experience and appreciate what someone in a band can go through in a tragedy like this; something we are seeing a lot more of these days. Mike has always been a talented lyricist and very good with the rhythm in his beats and his rap flow; and that is something he uses to his advantage on this album. There are plenty of times where you will just feel like flowing along with him because of how good the beat is to the song and how great the words sound, and then it hits you what's actually being said and you get that punch in the gut. Or it feels expressive and you feel happy, and that's the power of music; something Shinoda does exceptionally on this album.
With the album having such a heavy background to it, its of no surprise that your first few listens will be listened to with that story in a mind. But we have all dealt with tragedy in our lives, most of all of us have lost someone close to them. These songs hold weight even in personalization, and can be a great solace to anyone who is hurting. Its not a perfect album, but with the basis of the album how could it have been? This isn't an album that someone spent in a studio for months with his buddies making 'the bands best work yet'. This is a man with raw emotion and grief that he needed to have an outlet for, and knowing the fans of Linkin Park were going through it to decided to put his best foot forward and share his grieving process with his fans. This is a great album, and is holding a high place in my albums for this year. This is a hard thing to do too, as this isn't your typical pop-rap album. Its an exceptional one, true, but the raw emotion of it, the themes, and the therapy session history of its creation gives it a power and strength that a lot of albums don't have. I recommend checking this out, as I said. If you listen to it, throw some headphones in, dim the lights; and be ready to have a real moment of clarity as you simply listen and feel the flow.
Stand out tracks: Place To Start, Over Again, Watching As I Fall, Nothing Makes Sense Anymore, Promises I Can't Keep, Crossing A Line, Hold It Together, Ghosts, Make It Up As I Go, Running From My Shadow, World's On Fire
