Blood on the Dance Floor
Haunted


0.5

Review

by Willow USER (21 Reviews)
April 13th, 2018 | 41 replies


Release Date: 2018 | Tracklist

Review Summary: Please end my suffering.

The last two or so years of the infamous Blood on the Dance Floor have been marked by nothing but turmoil; Jayy Von Monroe rightfully quit, and Dahvie Vanity attempted to branch out into something different (Sinners Are Winners) which failed for painfully obvious reasons. Seeing as how Vanity's only musical source of income was the Blood on the Dance Floor banner, he quickly got his fiancee Fallon Vendetta and reformed the duo, which means I have to sit here and sit through more musical excrement to review just so I can spare other poor bastards from having their ears destroyed.

First off, the musical quality: it has been wallowed down to what is essentially FL Studio presets. While it isn't utter crap, it isn't saying much; it's still mostly the same thing any other person could accomplish in their sleep. It's mixed pretty bad as well; if there's any bassline here, it's completely drowned out by the other electronics and the newfound vocal "tag team" of Dahvie and Fallon. As for vocals, Vanity still sounds like a musically inept chimpanzee who's desperate to go to notes clearly out of his range, and Fallon's voice isn't much of an improvement; it actually sounds like she's trying to rip off people like Ash Costello of New Years Day, which is understandable as they want it to seem like they have some degree of talent here, which they ultimately fail to accomplish. Vanity's rapping is once again even worse than his singing, sounding like a kitten being sodomized by a creature from the stereotypical version of hell. To my surprise, Vanity seemed somewhat underused throughout the single releases (such as "Ashes to Ashes" and "Ghost Story"); it seems as if he knows any semblance of what seems to be talent to him belongs to Fallon, so he puts her in charge of quite a lot of the vocals. As for the songs that AREN'T single releases, Dahvie seems to enjoy trying to rap even though it's been made quite clear that he simply cannot do so. In "From Dreams To Nightmares", he is criminally, straight-up out of tune, making it painful more than all the other tracks to listen to (other than "My Last Breathe", where the music is also pretty out-of-tune). Occasionally, in songs like "The Ocean and The Moon", you can't even understand a single word either of them are saying.

The lyrical quality took quite the nosedive following Jayy's departure; neither Dahvie nor Fallon can create good rhymes to save their lives...or actual lyrics for that matter. This is the third and fatal flaw to Haunted; they seem to not care anymore, as if the band and their music only serve to pay off the legal fees for Dahvie's inevitable trial (and hopefully imprisonment) on charges that will not be discussed here, because not only do I feel uncomfortable talking about it, but I also do not like beating what should have been a dead horse almost ten years ago. Everything within this album just boils down to being solid proof that Haunted is why BOTDF should have stuck to being a broken up band, and what compels them to continue (unless the time of paying off inevitable legal fees finally comes) is as big of a mystery as to why Dahvie hasn't been sent to the slammer yet.



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user ratings (32)
Chart.
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Comments:Add a Comment 
WeepinnWillow
April 13th 2018


393 Comments

Album Rating: 0.5

You CAN stream some parts of the album...but why would you do that to yourself?



(Constructive criticism appreciated)

Digging: Get Scared - The Dead Days

SteakByrnes
April 13th 2018


14572 Comments


You're a brave soul to listen to this, I commend your courage and dub thee a knight on the council

foxblood
April 13th 2018


9491 Comments


oh god

FearThyEvil
April 13th 2018


16784 Comments


These guys should get an award for constantly being able to be producing the worst music out there. I really think these guys hands down are the worst thing in music.

kris.
April 13th 2018


15029 Comments


"I have to sit here and sit through more musical excrement to review just so I can spare other poor bastards from having their ears destroyed"

bud i don't think you do

Asdfp277
April 13th 2018


20001 Comments


"I have to sit here and sit through"

kinda odd wording

will pos for fun and profit

Digging: Black Barrel - Last Frontier

Asdfp277
April 13th 2018


20001 Comments


the chick on the cover looks like alyssa edwards done by jeffree star

Ashtiel
April 13th 2018


357 Comments


why are these guys still making stuff

Digging: Black Mountain - Wilderness Heart

Opturus
April 13th 2018


99 Comments


I really don't see the point of reviewing any album of this group.

Everyone knows that they sucks.

Darius the Great
April 13th 2018


20127 Comments


im glad i cant hear rn cause then i wont be able to hear this

Meridiu5
April 13th 2018


2034 Comments


darius is dying =[

Digging: Merzbow - Cloud Cock OO Grand

Darius the Great
April 13th 2018


20127 Comments


:[

SteakByrnes
April 13th 2018


14572 Comments


:[

Darius the Great
April 13th 2018


20127 Comments


should i jam this while deaf 4 the lulz xD

it might finish me off and actually kill me tho :[

TheSonomaDude
April 13th 2018


6829 Comments


hmmm i wonder if this album is good or not...

po0ty
April 13th 2018


583 Comments


Its hilarious how many albums these guys have.

Asdfp277
April 13th 2018


20001 Comments


they don't put a lot of effort into them so they can make a lot ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

dfevil085
April 14th 2018


1413 Comments


NO
comment to short wtf
And this isn't a Snide review?

RippingCorpse1986
April 14th 2018


3076 Comments


Is this a The Haunted cover album?

teamster
April 14th 2018


4054 Comments


Never heard of them...I guess I’m one of the lucky ones.
Edit : OMG , looking at their discog here and ratings ..holy fuck!



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