Katy Perry
Witness


2.3
average

Review

by Jordan M. STAFF
June 10th, 2017 | 106 replies


Release Date: 2017 | Tracklist

Review Summary: We all want to be seen.

At the time of writing, Witness is already failing; spurred by the pro-Clinton humdrum of "Chained to the Rhythm" and the Quavo and cunnilingus buffet of "Bon App├ętit" (and to a lesser extent, the late night, muted disco of "Swish Swish"), Katy Perry's adventures in being woke are DOA. The album's failing to chart, the singles aren't making an impact, and there's an increasingly trite critical narrative emerging that puts it in competition with the equally dry and uninspired Teenage Dream. Needless to say, nobody likes Witness, and for good reason; between the Migos and Hot Chip features that slide into vacuous spaces of abysmal lyricism, it's obvious that the greatest part of any Pop Song- the immediacy- has been utterly drained in favour of some antiquated, crushingly dull 'coolness.' So, though "I Kissed a Girl" (or any number of infectiously dumb songs up until the consciously staid nothing that was Prism) could at least work its way into radios, movies, conversations, and large public areas, it's hard to pin down any stadium that would think it appropriate to blast "Save as Draft" or "Tsunami," or better yet, any adult that would think much of Katy Perry just because she's collaborated with Purity Ring. In fairness, Witness isn't a failure, and its good intentions, both politically and sexually, aren't insufferable as much as they are listless and unsatisfying. She's confident moving to the beat of synthpop, hip hop, and disco, even if the songs aren't worth much of anyone's time, and, needless to say, it comes off as far more capable than any other lazily calibrated Perry clone in-waiting for stardom. So although Witness will probably go down as a curiosity for everyone, it's at least got enough maturity to sustain a tour cycle if not a more wholesomely curated comeback. In the meantime, let's all appreciate a time when production from DJ Mustard, a songwriting credit from Sia, and rap verse from Nicki Minaj were thought of as fashionable, chic, and daring musical choices.




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user ratings (169)
Chart.
2
poor
other reviews of this album
LaurenPaulson (3)
Unexpected, risky, honest and brilliantly addictive record....

Sailors (4.5)
"Witness" is a fantastic voyage of the artpop creator's most intimate collection...

Homogenic (5)
...

BlownSpeakers (1.5)
Katy Perry's Witness sparkles like a bedazzled turd....


Comments:Add a Comment 
theacademy
Staff Reviewer
June 10th 2017


31126 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

alright elliot s edwards



now we're going to have words

rafalafa
June 10th 2017


67 Comments


Break that shit up into paragraphs, mang. It reads like the rantings of a mentally challenged homeless person with a megaphone.

Your points are valid and substantiated, but my god if it isn't painful to read.

Wildhoney
June 10th 2017


191 Comments


Extremely readable, no idea what you're talking about. This is as much as I want to read about about Katy Perry lol. great review

Drubbi
June 10th 2017


271 Comments


I was almost tempted to put myself through this just to review it and prove this is not 4-4.5 worthy. I'm glad someone else did it for me.

Digging: Foxing - Nearer My God

DamnVanne
June 10th 2017


2572 Comments


No feature could be worse than Juicy J's on Dark Horse, but I'll be sure to see if anything has that kind of ironic entertainment value

Divaman
June 10th 2017


2626 Comments


I was almost tempted to put myself through this just to review it and prove this is not 4-4.5 worthy. I'm glad someone else did it for me. (2)


Digging: Midas Fall - Evaporate

mvdu
June 10th 2017


758 Comments

Album Rating: 2.0

"Chained to the Rhythm" isn't bad actually, and she experiments a little, but the album rates about a C- for this reason: it's neither good art nor does it have any of the attention grabbing hooks of good pop music. So I agree.

deathschool
June 11th 2017


22558 Comments


I assume this is a good review, but I disagree

Homogenic
June 11th 2017


7 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

album isn't too bad, it seems to be progress for katy perry's plastic pop music. she even produce 60% of her songs with witness, which is rare for pop musicants.



hope to see more objective views on this record, tbh.

Nikkolae
June 11th 2017


5373 Comments


that goddamn cover is awful, "Katy Perry's adventures in being woke are DOA" pretty much summed up the whole phase she is going through right now.

Digging: Skycamefalling - 10.21

EphemeralEternity
June 11th 2017


3125 Comments


cover looks a little 'out there' for a plastic pop princess

RogueNine
June 11th 2017


3618 Comments


This is objective as anything else.

Dreakon
June 11th 2017


450 Comments


How many progressively worse albums are we away from a Katy Perry sex tape? That's the only reason I'm keeping tabs on this at all.

Lucid
June 11th 2017


9873 Comments


"The album's failing to chart"
this is projected to debut at #1 on billboard 200

TrantaLocked
June 11th 2017


1816 Comments

Album Rating: 3.0

Four songs in and every single song sounds radio-worthy, so I have to disagree on your idea of this album failing.

Cygnatti
June 11th 2017


32551 Comments

Album Rating: 2.0 | Sound Off

Swish swish is p decent ngl

runaways
June 11th 2017


674 Comments


she really went full Bjork on this thing

Asdfp277
June 11th 2017


18435 Comments

Album Rating: 2.5

"Four songs in and every single song sounds radio-worthy, so I have to disagree on your idea of this album failing."

front-loaded?

runaways: don't talk about bjork like that. edit: bruh, learn 2 distinguish pop smh :[

Analogart
June 12th 2017


30 Comments


this gives me second hand embarrassment.

StrizzMatik
June 12th 2017


3680 Comments


Just another shit album from America's favorite MKULTRA kitty, yawn



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