Review Summary: epic gamer win
Religion is a finicky topic to say the least. With hundreds of religions in the world, it is hard to make a strong case for the idea that there is a mythical being with benevolent omnipotence that loves all human beings, despite threatening humans with horrifying possibilities. No matter how devastating some tragedies may be, some people are quick to say that it is all apart God's plan. Not that any ill will is aimed upon reasonable people who are religious, it's just that the constant atrocities make many people doubt that there is a loving being who wants to protect us when innocent people are hurt, killed, and put into situations that involve suffering. Out of all of these cosmic injustices, one will be explained soon enough, but not without some context.
The perfect proof for the lack of a all-knowing being or their laissez faire attitude is the lovechild between Arin “Egoraptor” Hanson, popular Youtube “comedian” and animator, and Ninja Sex Party, mediocre joke band that really, really like their penises. This failed abortion of a concept was given the name Starbomb, and they started pumping out unfunny video game parodies that would be ideal for twelve year olds that think nothing is funnier than the word “dick” or “cunt.” And this power team of unfunny musicians decided to go beyond the call of trash by releasing a whole album of absolute trite under the named after their band.
The members of Starbomb's idea of comedy is very predictable and wince-inducing, as it revolves around the same ideals of most internet video game parodies, which includes shock humor, a revolting lack of subtly, an excess of sexual innuendos, and disgustingly repetitive jokes. Every song's love of the same boring “What if this kid's game was dark"” scenarios like on The Book of Nook, Kirby's Adventures in Reamland, I Choose You to Die, and pretty much every single song on this God-forsaken album. Unfortunately, everyone who decides to put themselves through this Hell will be experiencing the same jokes throughout the whole album, with the only song that gets points is Crasher-Vania, which is only passable for its lack of sex puns and lack of super try-hard imagery.
The super unfunny song lyrics and concepts that plague this record are portrayed by Arin Hanson and Danny “Sexbang” Avidan, who is the lead singer of Ninja Sex Party. Hanson's rap delivery is quite mediocre, as his flows are often unremarkable and his inflections try to come off as “badass,” despite Hanson not being able to back it up. Avidan, who will not be called by his stupid stage name, has a voice filled with potential, which sadly is not realized here. Both vocalists also enjoy putting on goofy voices that get grating when used for entire songs like Crasher-vania and Mega Marital Problems. Coupled with the corny and repetitive lines, these vocals are only good for making one of the most uncomfortable music experiences ever created by man.
As for the beats, made by “Ninja” Brian Wecht, they don't fair very well, even when isolated. Wecht's music consists of lifeless drum beats that are infested by overstated and bombastic synths that get extremely annoying when overused throughout the 27 minute run-time. These bits of music are also mixed with the occasional portions of different music styles, like love song piano chords and cliché, chugging metal. The stale and repetitive music matches quite well with the rest of this album, which means that all of the elements come together to create an explosive collection of absolute failure.
While it can be said that Starbomb is one of the easiest targets and its not meant to stand up to the highs set up by other pop and rap fusions, it is still absolutely atrocious on the standards set by comedy and parody artists who know how to fuse funny jokes and listenable music. Starbomb does not know how this works, however, as they did not accomplish either. This target may have been easy, but it does make a lack of belief in a God seem a lot more reasonable.