Review Summary: NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AVOID THIS ALBUM AT ALL COSTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Punk Goes... put out a compilation that was put forth to companies worldwide and was released to the world entitled 'Punk Goes Classic Rock'.
Now, this isn't the first time that this has happened, this is something that you see compilations and cover albums done by solo bands as well as compilations of artists all the time. And this is usually a good thing. With bands such as Overkill, Metallica and Children Of Bodom in the Metal genre that have been able to pull this off. Sometimes, you're able to get to get a hit, other times you don't. Sometimes you just get one song off a particular album, sometimes you get a whole collection. However, this one should've been a f***ing ABORTION!!!
First off, let's get started with the bare bones basics about this album: the title. The title is 'Punk Goes Classic Rock'. Now, I understand that it seems like a very straightforward title. Whenever you think of Punk though, who do you think of? You think about bands such as Bad Religion, The Sex Pistols and Black Flag and maybe some of you younger kids may think of Green Day, Blink 182 and The Offspring. But here's some examples of some of the bands that are on this album: you have Hit The Lights, Piece The Veil, Mayday Parade, Forever The Sickest Kids, Never Shout Never, A Skylit Drive, Blessthefall, etc. Is this really punk? NO! You know what is associated with at least half of these bands? EMO!!! Yeah, I know they were on Warped Tour and Warped Tour is traditionally a Punk festival. But whenever you go there and you listen to it, the first thing you wanna do is rip your f***ing eardrums out! Why? The music does not resemble the Punk that I remember and let me tell you something: the Punk that I remember was actually good. It was actually tolerable. It actually stood for something. It wasn't this bulls**t that sounds like emo music that's done by a bunch of people who look exactly like emos! Do I believe that Emo is an actual real genre? No. If it was, it would have it's own section because everybody and their f***ing mother wants to do it, but these bands DO NOT represent Punk music and if THIS is what Punk music is today, then the scene is D E A D.
Now, let's get into some of the actual songs. Now, a lot of the original performers and songs you are gonna know very well. 'More Than A Feeling' by Boston, 'Paint It Black' by The Rolling Stones, 'Free Fallin'' by Tom Petty, there's a couple of Queen songs, a Def Leppard song, Aerosmith and a couple of Ozzy songs.
There's SO many things to complain about I don't know what to start.
Let's start with another bare-bones basic: the lyrics. If you don't know the lyrics to the song, even if it's just one or two words, I might be nitpicking but I don't care. If you don't know the lyrics to the song, DO NOT change them up and think "Well, nobody's gonna notice". People who know these songs WILL notice! "Love me like a bomb/Come on baby get it on" IT'S NOT THAT DIFFICULT!!! IT IS NOT really difficult, The Maine, for 'Pour Some Sugar On Me'. No, whenever you said "I don't f***ing know!", it wasn't right.
Secondly, I understand that, like my introduction, a lot of these bands are able to take certain creative liberties in order to make cover songs fit a little bit better within their repertoire. But the covers present on this album are absolutely atrocious! These are murdering the original songs! Giving them a sound that absolutely makes me sick. It's something when modernization is not a terrible thing but in this case, this is where you take it to the retarded level! Whenever I'm listening to 'All Along The Watchtower' by Envy On The Coast, which of course was originally done by Bob Dylan and covered by Jimi Hendrix, you sort of expect a little something. You expect it to maybe sound a little bit like either one. And the result is just 'All Along The Watchtower' if it was a Punk song. Really not that good, really not that impressive and whenever you listen to it, the very first thing that comes in your mind is "This is s**t!".
Never Shout Never pulls off 'Bohemian Rhapsody'? No, they don't. They absolutely DO NOT pull off this song. They destroy the feeling and the emotion. The crescendo right at the end right before "Nothing ever matters/Nothing more you see/Nothing really matters/Nothing really matters to me", they destroyed it! That's the moment when it's supposed to be an emotional turn, a tug at your heartstrings and it's supposed to make you really emotional and want to cry because it's that finale. They destroyed this song!
And Blessthefall's cover of 'Dream On', let's not even get into it.
Let's skip right to 'Crazy Train' covered by Forever The Sickest Kids. Now this is one of those songs that the first time I listened to it, I thought to myself "Okay. Maybe". In fact, the first time I listened to it was while I was at work and I actually uttered the words "This isn't bad...Bravo." I know why I said that now. I know exactly why I said that: because I was FAR F***ING AWAY FROM THE SPEAKERS! So, whatever I was hearing was whatever my mind wanted it to sound like mixed with what it actually was. Why? Because before writing this review, I was actually right next to the speakers. I can hear every tone, each and every word, each and every piece of atmosphere that is in this song and it just boggles my mind why I ever thought it was good. It is atrocious! First off, if you can't play the guitars, I understand substituting the instruments but let me tell you that it RUINS the sound and absolutely destroys it, annihilates it and it does not sound anything like the original and I can't stand it.
The Almost doing 'Free Fallin'' by Tom Petty. Whenever you're improvising right in the middle, doing you're own little thing in there, cool and all. But, it's something you want to do live, not on a studio representation. I can't believe half of these bands signed off on this. But then I remembered something else...
Typically, whenever a cover is done, it is an artist's representation of their influences. THAT IS NOT THE CASE WITH THIS ALBUM! Why? It's because there has been SIXTEEN different compilations by the same parade of artists that have absolutely nothing to do with Classic Rock.
We have 'Punk Goes Pop', 'Pop Goes Crunk', 'Punk Goes Christmas' WHAT THE F**K IS NEXT? 'Punk Goes Country'? 'Punk Goes Opera'? 'Punk Goes Space Opera'? 'Punk Goes Latin'? 'Punk Goes Jazz'? 'Punk Goes This' and 'Punk Goes That'! 'Punk Goes To The Grave' I HOPE THEY F***ING DO!!! Because THAT'S where these bands deserve to be! This is NOT a representation of Classic Rock as it is just commercialism. Do you think I'm full of it? Go right ahead! Do you like these bands and hate my opinion and think this review as atrocious, then go ahead, s**t all over my review, but it's the goddamn truth!
What's next, are you gonna throw My Chemical Romance, Limp Bizkit, Panic! At The Disco, Blood On The Dance Floor, Black Veiled Brides, Avenged Sevenfold, Slipknot, etc. into one giant compilation and say "It's one style of music" but it's really not. You might as well call it 'Country Goes Western' or 'This Goes That'. And now I refer back to my sentence at the start of this long and exhaustively angry review: These are NOT Punk bands. These are Emo bands.
This an atrocity of a compilation. If anything, this is something that should be banned from the shelves and if they really wanna do this, they should take a lot more time, a lot more effort, they should re-do everything and make it sound a lot better because this is awful. This is absolutely disgusting. This is what the music business does not need. If you want it to be 'Punk Goes Classic Rock', get Black Flag to play a Pink Floyd or a Rush song and I'm not really a fan of either two bands anymore. Some people consider them Progressive Rock, some people consider them Classic Rock. I don't care, shut up. Have a band of the ACTUAL Punk genre play a Led Zeppelin song. It's not that hard. It really isn't.
AVOID THIS AT ALL COSTS. This is one of those albums that if you buy it and listen to it, I really pray to God that you go outside, smash it with a baseball bat, take a s**t on it, kick it and then all of a sudden decide to let your dog eat the f***ing remains!!! THIS IS AWFUL!!! That being said, 'Punk Goes Classic Rock' gets a nice, blistering 1 star out of 5. Why? Because unlike anything that I've ever done or listened to, it was recorded, it was put on a CD, it was packaged and it was sold. That's it. I'd have more talent masturbating than what this CD has to offer. 'Nuff said.