Beach Slang
Cheap Thrills On A Dead End Street


3.0
good

Review

by Electric City EMERITUS
September 30th, 2014 | 85 replies


Release Date: 09/30/2014 | Tracklist

Review Summary: You're 23 and drinking PBR.

It’s 1997 and you’re six years old. You hear The Who’s Tommy from outside your older sister’s bedroom door. You dance in the hallway with an uninhibited exuberance you won’t recreate until you try MDMA in your early 20s. You get a role in the local high school’s production of the stage musical and take a brief, fervent interest in drums and pinball. Interest in the latter wanes.

It’s 2000 and you’re nine years old. You hear a song on the radio that you connect with instantly. You think it’s Blink-182, but it can’t be Blink-182 because Blink-182 has a whinier singer. You later find out it actually was Blink-182 and the song is called “Adam’s Song.” Your name is Adam. You feel spooked for the next four years.

It’s 2004 and the world clicks into view. You’re thirteen years old. American Idiot comes out. Music opens up to you in a way it never has before. It feels vital, revolutionary. Your first rock show is a Green Day concert at Giants Stadium. Your Dad drives you. Jimmy Eat World and Against Me! open, and he spends their sets adjusting his earplugs. Green Day plays and he spends the rest of the concert standing, having as good a time as you, though he’ll deny it to this day. Six months later, you write a sentence or two about every song on Kerplunk.

It’s 2005 and you start your first rock band with your best friends. You’re corny, as all of you have grown up on the periphery of cool, desperate to get in, but your songs are catchy and energetic, so some people like them. You conclude your first show with a cover of Taking Back Sunday. All the punk kids from school sing along. You are on top of the fucking world.

You break up the band in 2007.

It’s 2010 and you’re eighteen years old. Your girlfriend breaks up with you the month you discover Titus Andronicus’ The Monitor. Choking up, you scream Titus Andronicus lyrics at your steering wheel. You repeat this ritual with The Wrens, Brand New, My Chemical Romance, and others.

It’s 2012 and you’re twenty-one. You and your college roommate have just had a devastating fight, but you already have tickets to a Japandroids concert. You go. You both stage dive during your favorite songs. You search him out in the crowd for “Younger Us” so you can scream “Give me that night you were already in bed, said fuck it, got up to drink with me instead,” with him in your arms. Things are forgiven.

It is January 2014. You’ve lived nearly a full year away from your Dad, your best friends, your girlfriend, all the people who’ve helped form you into a very-questionably functioning adult. You attend the last Bomb the Music Industry! show ever. You go alone. You scream the lyrics you know into the arms of strangers. You look back on the night wondering how great it could’ve been if your friends had been there.

It’s September the same year. You’re living in New York and a band comes up on your radar. You’re told they’re “Goo Goo Dolls meets Japandroids.” They bill themselves as “Guitar, bass, and drums. Played loudly.” You listen to them breathlessly sing about good times over raucous guitars and energized drums and draw lines between moments from your past like they were stars. You hear them sing “It’s Friday night and I’m in the basement, screaming out my lungs with my best friends,” and see a lifetime’s supply of rock kitsch exposed for what it is. You feel a dizzying cocktail of joy, sadness, and vertigo. You wish you still believed in the healing power of power chords and the solidarity of punk lyrics. But you don’t anymore. Not really.

You sit down to write about Beach Slang and feel an illusion you’ve strived to keep alive your whole life crystallize into perfect clarity. Your world clicks into view again. You start to type.




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user ratings (74)
Chart.
3.6
great
other reviews of this album
Curse. (4.5)
Beach Slang show that their first EP was no fluke, and they are a band to watch out for....


Comments:Add a Comment 
klap
Staff Reviewer
September 29th 2014


11756 Comments

Album Rating: 3.0

mmm dem mid-20s are just getting started

Curse.
September 29th 2014


8053 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

Ugh this fucking review

Rail
September 29th 2014


565 Comments


How's your navel?

theacademy
Staff Reviewer
September 29th 2014


30786 Comments


ha

theacademy
Staff Reviewer
September 30th 2014


30786 Comments


You attend the last Bomb the Music Industry! show ever. You go alone. You scream the lyrics you know into the arms of strangers. You look back on the night wondering how great it could’ve been if your friends had been there.


haha i text u dude.. u coulda screamed the words u knew into the arms of an internet frenemy

someguest
September 30th 2014


28826 Comments


could this review be anymore of a letdowner?

Spare
September 30th 2014


5567 Comments


You start to type. Your dick gets so hard. You jerk off. It feels good

StormChaser
September 30th 2014


509 Comments


Haha

BlacKapes
September 30th 2014


1920 Comments


wow this could have been a soundoff

summary - described as Goo Goo Dolls meets Japandroids, they bill themselves as "Guitar, bass, and drums. Played loudly." They sing about good times over raucous guitars and energized drums and play a lot of power chords. One line from a song is "It’s Friday night and I’m in the basement, screaming out my lungs with my best friends".

WOW NICE, this is what i got from this review dude we don't need your life story ok

BlacKapes
September 30th 2014


1920 Comments


what are you talking about, i dont mind informal reviews as long as you know, they actually describe the album

JohnnyOnTheSpot
Staff Reviewer
September 30th 2014


6363 Comments


^ I'm sure Adam Downer appreciates your criticism and will strive to improve

BlacKapes
September 30th 2014


1920 Comments


cool thatd be nice

BallsToTheWall
September 30th 2014


48142 Comments


I used to be a little boy
So old in my shoes
And what i choose is my choice
What's a boy supposed to do?
The killer in me is the killer in you
My love
I send this smile over to you

Digging: Vreid - I Krig

BlacKapes
September 30th 2014


1920 Comments


yeah i mean why should staff even bother making actual reviews

BlacKapes
September 30th 2014


1920 Comments


wow you are dense, im NOT SAYING that he writes shit reviews im saying this particular review is shit and i gave my reasons

ChoccyPhilly
September 30th 2014


11667 Comments


Wonderful read, but I think it would have worked a bit better in the blog section.

Digging: Thantifaxath - Void Masquerading as Matter

ADV123
September 30th 2014


197 Comments


awesome review

robin
Emeritus
September 30th 2014


4430 Comments


u lovely

Brostep
Emeritus
September 30th 2014


4313 Comments


review is terrible but in the way it intended in that I had a massive existentialist crisis while reading and am gonna have to listen to a band I like or something for catharsis dammit downer

Brostep
Emeritus
September 30th 2014


4313 Comments


basically rev is good have a mind-pos



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