Review Summary: Possibly the most unsettling album you'll ever hear. "Steven said little Ted was dead, I read in a letter today. The same for Monica's monkey he said. Quietly it passed away."
If you’re tracing the history of avant-garde rock back to its origin, it’s very likely that you’ll encounter the music of The Residents. More of an artistic concept than necessarily a band (although they’ve played shows), their music is challenging in that it is often conceptually abrasive. The array of sounds heard on a Residents record can range from strings to electronic/ambient noises, to heavy (and often cheesy) synths. The vocal effects and vocals themselves are also hard to embrace at first. That being said, The Residents have one of the most extensive discographies I’ve ever seen; having been active since the seventies, they’ve consistently released albums, sometimes more than twice a year. Most of their albums appear to serve either as stand-alone stories, or as a part of a larger story arc. The Residents take the idea of a “concept album” to a whole new level. Although they were not the first band to use this idea (other progressive bands such as Yes, Pink Floyd, and Alan Parsons Project also released concept albums in the mid-seventies), they did manage to pull-off some very strange concepts that remain potent today. With album titles like “The Third Reich N’ Roll” and “The Bunny Boy”, they seem like a band that derives entertainment from strange humor. But if they weren’t serious about their music, would they really devote forty years of their time to it?
I encourage everyone reading this right now to do some personal research on the band after reading this review. Here, I’ll be talking about a more recent Residents album that was released in 2011 called Lonely Teenager. Although there isn’t a definitive story that is told through the eight diverse-sounding tracks, each one does tell its own tale.
“Six More Miles” is one of the more formless tracks, drawing more from dark ambience and sound effects than anything else. While there are some strange vocal passages delivered in a southern accent, the track seems to be more driven by dark synths and other effects; the sound of a loud train passing can be heard towards the beginning, as well as a harmonica later in the track. The southern accent and reverb effect on the vocals also add to the overall creepiness and ominousness of the song. Although I wasn’t aware of this at first, it’s actually a cover (of sorts) of an old Hank Williams tune called “Six More Miles to the Graveyard”, which is basically an old country song about death splitting two lovers apart. And it even has a line about a “train comin’” (which makes the train noises in The Residents’ version that much more unsettling). With that in mind, this has to be one of the creepiest covers of all time, in the best way possible.
“My Window” is a song about dreams. The minor arpeggio that the bass plays throughout the track is pretty straightforward, by the band manages to keep it interesting with their layering of instrumentation and a really cool/bizarre guitar solo. The strings sound very synthetic; I found that a little disappointing. I really like this track regardless of that though, even if just for the story. The lyrics detail a handful of dark and equally random events, such as “Mr. Coo Coo” falling asleep (who we assume to be some kind of bird), a little boy dying, and a monkey dying. As unrelated as they seem, the bleak imagery of the track serves its purpose. I found the line about the “sky being dark as a hopeless heart” to be particularly chilling.
The creepiness of the album roots itself deeper with the next track. “The Unseen Sister” encapsulates everything that is unsettling about this album. It’s one of the few songs that include samples/audio of “first-hand accounts” of paranormal occurrences (along with the final track, “Talking Light”). This track also features some interesting percussive elements, as well as a child-like xylophone part to parallel the chilling story being told. After the vocals subside, the voice of a woman is heard recalling certain events of her childhood. She speaks of her “invisible sister” who would protect her while also trying to hurt their mother. My interpretation of the woman’s story was that she had a sister that was neglected by their mother, and died as a child, and the “unseen sister” is her ghost coming back to haunt her (while also protecting her other sister). Another theory is that the woman had split-personality disorder as a child, and the other part of her was the “unseen sister”. She would justify her punishment of her mother via this persona, possibly. This horrific story, paired with the child-like xylophone, makes this track one of the more disturbing of the eight on this album.
“The Lizard Lady” features some new vocal effects and interesting percussive elements; the lyrics are pretty laughable though. It’s basically what you would expect it to be based on the song title. It’s a song about a lizard lady. The southern accented vocalist dishing out the nonsensical story, along with a lizard voice towards the middle make this track hilarious to the point where it’s integrity as a song is questioned a bit.
“The Sleepwalker” was kind of disappointing for me. Although it introduced a new Arabian type of feel to it, I found the theme of dreams (recurring again) to be a bit redundant and uninteresting. Nothing about this song was really memorable for me.
The album picks up interest again with the next song, “The Old Woman”. The synths and guitar on this track are really good, and pair well with the story being told. In a very strange vocal effect, an old woman laments about feeling lonely and wanting to “murder herself”. It’s disturbing at first, but the creepiness plateaus when the actual music stops, and only ambience remains as she asks, “if I do it, who will take care of my plants?” Her concern for the plants is deeply disturbing, especially when she begins considering different people to take care of them, then deeming them unworthy. This caricature of the “old woman” must be satire on the darkest level.
“Boxes of Armageddon” is pretty simplistic lyrically. It seems to be about boxes full of documents from the past left in somebody’s doorway.
“They were well-worn cardboard boxes, bulging from the weight
Of documents obsessed with mindless slaughter and decay
For me to see
Boxes that depicted a sad reality
Full of fiction and reflections of insanity”
Although the subject isn’t explained well, it remains interesting and thought provoking. As for the music itself, the instrumentation stays relevant with some piano, synths, horns, and vocals that pan from ear to ear. The chanting in the latter half of the track is a nice change of pace, with percussive elements reminiscent of Mr. Bungle’s sound.
Much like “The Unseen Sister”, “Talking Light” is less of a song and more of a spoken word story. The ambient noise, drums, and guitar serve as a score to the story rather than a song. “Once, when I was a lonely teenager…” is said repeatedly, thus giving the listener a sense of how the album was titled. In his trademark southern accent, the vocalist recalls a story from his adolescence in which he found an abandoned cottage/shack where he found a baby’s skeleton and a ring. I won’t go into further detail regarding the story, but it does make for a very unsettling final message. At times, I felt that the voice was too quiet and not as audible as I would have liked. I also thought his exaggeration of emotions while telling the story was a bit cartoonish. That being said, it was still extremely eerie. Especially when he blames the whole incident on the “instability of adolescence”.
Lonely Teenager is less of a definitive concept album and more of a collection of songs with similar themes. Bleakness, ghosts, apprehension, dreams, and fear are all recurring topics that seem to be vital in the digestion of this album, despite some of its silliness and humor. Each track sounds strangely different from the last. That’s one thing that I really like about this album. This aspect keeps it from getting too dull. Another thing I’ve noticed is that this record gets more unsettling with every listen. Like I said earlier, I didn’t realize that the first song was a cover at first. I also didn’t fully comprehend the level of creepiness that’s fond in some of the other tracks, such as “The Unseen Sister”, “The Old Woman” and “Talking Light”. This is one of the most unsettling albums I’ve come across in a long time; it’s a shame that more people haven’t heard of this album, or even The Residents in general. Hopefully this review sparks some more interest into the crazy/insane genre they’ve created.
7/10
Fav tracks: My Window, The Old Woman, Talking Light
Least Fav tracks: The Sleepwalker
