Sex Pistols
Never Mind the Bollocks, Here's the Sex Pistols


3.0
good

Review

by YoWassupBros USER (5 Reviews)
August 6th, 2012 | 19 replies


Release Date: 1977 | Tracklist

Review Summary: Never mind the critic's bollocks, here's an actual review of this:

Out of all the manufactured rock bands out there (and there are tons!) most of them are actually pretty damn good. Smashing Pumpkins, Nirvana, hell, even The Clash hold the usual rock paradox: they seem to oppose mainstream culture when their very identities revolve around their image and their success hinges on targeting their demographic with as much accuracy as Dr. Luke. In essence there really isn't any difference between successful rock bands and successful pop artists.

The reason I bring all of this up is because if there was ever a manufactured rock band, The Sex Pistols would be it. Oh sure, today tons of kids and pretentious a-holes alike will go on and on about the cultural significance of the Pistols. How they led a political movement in the U.K. How they connected with the youth of the time and revolutionized the rock genre. No such thing in reality.

The backstory to the Pistols is rather simple. Some prick that ran a store was amused by Rotten's rude antics. Deciding that it would be a funny prank to get this annoying waste of life in a band to try and annoy as many people as possible, he came up with the idea of The Sex Pistols. Tell me this isn't the most hilarious story ever.

Simply stated, The Sex Pistols are just a bunch of talentless losers trying to annoy as many people as possible. You can hear it in the purposefully offensive lyrics. Topics ranging from abortion to egocentrism abound. The opening track itself just appears to be making a political statement about Berlin. But if you even examine the lyrics you realize these punks have nothing to say. They're just spewing out whatever they thought would get people mad with as little thought as possible. Rotten sings each line with the glee of an internet troll about to witness the chaos he just provoked.

It's all good fun but at the end of the day, these guys can barely play their instruments and they were just messing around. There's nothing classic or for the ages here. There's nothing even resembling originality here (unless your idea of original is getting a bunch of idiots from the streets to make a racket) or a meaningful message. It's just an attempt to get attention by being as offensive and loud as possible. That's the epitome of dumb, senseless music. Guys, this is the music that obnoxious hobo that asks you for cash and then insults you when you refuse to fund his awful lifestyle would make.

So the next time you hear a music critic tell you that The Sex Pistols were out making intense political statements or that they were fearless pioneers in challenging musical standards, be sure to punch them in the face. That's simply not true. It is true, however, that this album epitomizes everything punk: political posturing, image over substance and just general awfulness and obnoxiousness. Anyone who glorifies punk needs to get their head checked.


user ratings (1747)
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Comments:Add a Comment 
Tyler.
August 6th 2012


16994 Comments


This reads like you totally hate it not a 3. Neg It sounds like you hate it in general

YoWassupBros
August 6th 2012


151 Comments

Album Rating: 3.0

>It's all good fun

>Tell me this isn't the most hilarious story ever.



I'm laughing with the band bro. I'm saying that this stuff doesn't come even close to the legendary

status it is given but not once do I say that the album is unlisteanable or really awful. It's just a

bunch of dudes playing around, it's not great and it ain't godawful either. I hate the fake praise it

gets. Come on man, read between the lines

YoWassupBros
August 6th 2012


151 Comments

Album Rating: 3.0

I thought the question was "Was this review well written? Y/N"



Not, "Do u agree w/ the author's interpretation of the album? Y/N?"





inb4 huge paragraph explaining how the two are somehow related, as par the course on this website.





YoWassupBros
August 6th 2012


151 Comments

Album Rating: 3.0

Called it! "review was shit though how can it be well-written if you're wrong" = trying to connect quality of writing with subjective opinion about album. Strong logic man.

YoWassupBros
August 6th 2012


151 Comments

Album Rating: 3.0

Bro, that paragraph doesn't insult the reader, unless you identify yourself as a kid that worships the

70's despite never being born in that era or some rock critic with excessively strong opinions about

stuff, in which case, praying 4 u!



Lulz @ trying to act like if Rotten wasn't like that annoying hobo. Reports of him prior to the band

involve him spitting at costumers and trying to start fights with randoms. But I guess we'll just

forget all about that to protect ur pet band.

porch
August 6th 2012


8460 Comments

Album Rating: 3.0

bad alt

YoWassupBros
August 6th 2012


151 Comments

Album Rating: 3.0

> who says rock music needs sense?



When did I say it was bad because it was senseless? The point I was making was that this album

wasn't some strong statement against institutions or a call to arms for the youth, it was just a

bunch of losers (and don't tell me that these dudes are the shining examples of success) making a

racket. That's why this album is merely good. It has it's moments but it sure ain't worth getting so

defensive about it.



You're just proving my point here bro! Also kinda embarrassing. I mean, okay, I get it "u strongly

disagree w/ my review" no need to go on a long ass rant about it, haha.



LOL!



>pistols never claimed to be political or fearless pioneers, they were just wanting to have fun.



Wow, did you not understand my review? That was my point exactly! They weren't out to challenge any

norms, it was just good fun and an attempt to get people mad. Strong reading comprehension man.



Point of this review



------>



Your head

ShadowRemains
August 6th 2012


25010 Comments

Album Rating: 2.0

hate this album



but yeah this review ain't good either for reasons mentioned

YoWassupBros
August 6th 2012


151 Comments

Album Rating: 3.0

"Schooling my ass"=u getting all buttmad about something? K man, if u say so! (brb, hiding under my

bed out of vicarious embarrassment



Now for y'all that don't get the point of this review, it's just to point out why this stuff doesn't

deserve the praise it gets and what the album actually is VS. what it's portrayed to be. Sorry I have

to spell everything out for y'all.

ShadowRemains
August 6th 2012


25010 Comments

Album Rating: 2.0

"Schooling my ass"=u getting all buttmad about something? K man, if u say so! (brb, hiding under my

bed out of vicarious embarrassment



Now for y'all that don't get the point of this review, it's just to point out why this stuff doesn't

deserve the praise it gets and what the album actually is VS. what it's portrayed to be. Sorry I have

to spell everything out for y'all.




lol shut the fuck up



we get your point but this review does not reflect this in an effective manner

YoWassupBros
August 6th 2012


151 Comments

Album Rating: 3.0

"it never claims to be any of the things you say it's not though."



Idk how many times I have to say this but that is my point exactly! People who call this album

classic do so for the wrong reasons. At the end of the day it's just a bunch of street losers

playing instruments. Not much to see here and given the countless other garage rock bands of the

60's, it wasn't nearly as revolutionary as it was made to be.



The origin of the band counts if the purpose of the review was to set the record straight about what

the band actually is vs. the myths and legends behind it. Jesus, not sure what's so hard to

understand about this but it is p funny that you think you're smarter than me b/c your anus got mad

and missed the point of the review.



I also don't diss the album because of the false praise it gets, where the hell did you get that

from bro? Jeez, y'all have huge reading problems. I say the album is okay and that's that. I ain't

dissing it based on it's dumb legacy.

ShadowRemains
August 6th 2012


25010 Comments

Album Rating: 2.0

Jesus, not sure what's so hard to understand about this but it is p funny that you think you're smarter than me b/c your anus got mad and missed the point of the review.




brb gonna tell my ass to chilllllll

YoWassupBros
August 6th 2012


151 Comments

Album Rating: 3.0

P hilarious that now I go on reddit (never been on the site) because you think--you know what, I don't

even know what you even think since you seem to have trouble understanding what the review actually

says!



Nah, the purpose of a review is to tell a little bit about the album. Which I did. I said it wasn't

the epic legend it's made out to be and it's just decent music. Deal with it.

facupm
August 6th 2012


11389 Comments

Album Rating: 3.0

bad review, it's pointless rude

YoWassupBros
August 6th 2012


151 Comments

Album Rating: 3.0

lolol so now I don't even listen to garage rock? Bet you can't even tell me the two garage rock bands

in this screen cap of my iTunes library.



http://tinyurl.com/8pvag9e



"I h8 ur interpretation of the album therefore u r stupid" Basically all ur comments summed up. Tell

me again how smart u r plz.

KILL
August 6th 2012


81232 Comments

Album Rating: 3.5

sweet

Trebor.
Staff Reviewer
August 6th 2012


56680 Comments

Album Rating: 3.5

users with down syndrome really shouldn't review

Ire
August 6th 2012


41945 Comments

Album Rating: 2.5

nice rating shadow sup man we never chat anymore damn

NightProwler
August 7th 2012


7005 Comments


Jesus Christ.



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