When Bears Attack!
Elisha


1.5
very poor

Review

by thechodewarrior USER (27 Reviews)
February 23rd, 2012 | 14 replies


Release Date: 2012 | Tracklist

Review Summary: Are metalcore bands even trying anymore?

Before I start this review, let me make one thing very clear. I enjoy metal/death/scene-core bands more than most of you probably do, and I let slide most bands because I find them enjoyable and inspired. It is very rare I come across a band as poor, uninspired and, for lack of a better adjective, epic-fail of a band such as When Bears Attack. Their debut Elisha doesn't help much either.

The album opens with a passage from the bible read over some muddled djun-djuns from the band with mid-range screams from lead singer Travis Lambert. A dreary album thus commences... and yeah, it's pretty bad. It sounds kind of like an Emmure song but done by the screamer of Arescyn. They use all the cliches too, the guitar tone of a djent song, the continuing monotonous mid-scream that gets very tiresome, very fast, talking then putting more pressure on the throat, turning it into a mid scream, and everything else used by every single metalcore band ever. It also doesn't help that this is a christian metalcore band.

Memorable riffs, licks and breakdowns are completely lacking. Everything is so forgettable that it almost feels like a chore listening to this. The one passage that comes closest to being memorable is the opening to Temerity, but even then, it feels incomplete and clumsy. The bass is typical metalcore bass, following basically everything the guitarists do, so it isn't even worth mentioning, although there are a few spots it is actually audible. The drums are so simple, it's kind of insulting. It's almost like the band hired the drummer because they wouldn't get signed with out one (however that wouldn't have been so bad) so they decided to just pick up the first one that tried out. I'm in a band myself and yes, we suck, but at least our bass, guitar and drum parts are varied enough to make each individual instrument stand out. You may make the argument that most metalcore bands are guilty of this, but in that case, they at least bring something interesting along with them. We Came As Romans are generic, sure, but their melodies are soaring and spacy, and they have interesting compositions to support that. Chelsea Grin are laughably 'br00t@l', but they don't just mindlessly chug, and the screamer has some of the most menacing fry screams I've ever heard, but I digress.

When Bears Attack are so uninspired and boring, it isn't even worth the listen. It's made even worse by the fact that the band brings nothing new to the long over-stayed tables of metalcore. The only reason anyone should ever listen to any song on this album would be around the 1:50 minute mark in Temerity. They do one of the stupidest things I've ever heard in a metalcore song. They have a gang chant of 'Bah!'. It might have sounded passable if the screamer just screamed it, but no. They had the whole group record themselves saying the word 'Bah!'. It makes me laugh to think they thought it would be brutal.



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user ratings (4)
1.5
very poor

Comments:Add a Comment 
FearThyEvil
February 23rd 2012


18523 Comments


With a band name like that I knew this would be terrible.

NeutralThunder12
February 23rd 2012


8742 Comments


just listened to two of their songs. Obvi it sucks bad, but I've heard worse

auberginedreams
February 23rd 2012


6626 Comments


what's the point in reviewing some random unknown metalcore band just to bash them? everybody knows that metalcore has become derivative, you're just beating a dead horse.

thechodewarrior
February 23rd 2012


62 Comments

Album Rating: 1.5

@auberginedreams

because maybe people will like me ;_;

Scoot
February 23rd 2012


22178 Comments


i don't know why bands insist on having terrible names

it turns me off from even wanting to check the music out

Tyrannic
February 23rd 2012


3296 Comments


"I enjoy metal/death/scene-core bands more than most of you probably do, and I let slide most bands because I find them enjoyable and inspired."



but that isn't very clear at all

thechodewarrior
February 23rd 2012


62 Comments

Album Rating: 1.5

@systemunfolded



Try Botch and Converge

wacknizzle
February 23rd 2012


14555 Comments


99%Suck 1%Gay

Aphrodisiac
February 23rd 2012


1739 Comments


wait a minute! metalcore actually used to try?! somebody quick! rec me something metalcore-y that actually resembled some/any form of cohesiveness.

not sure if trolling or just really stupid

jsaf7
February 23rd 2012


406 Comments


before i even clicked on this review i knew it would be a shitty metalcore band :p

ReturnToRock
February 23rd 2012


4805 Comments


There are the fundaments of a good review here, but you're falling juuuuust short. It's frustrating actually.

The thing is, you start off awfully. First paragraph needs proofreading, and please never EVER use the term "epic fail" in any sort of serious document. It also seemed like you were going to do a TBT - a big no-no these days on Sputnik (has been for years actually).

Overall, my mouse was aiming for the "no" button. But then with the third paragraph, you got much better. You strayed away from the TBT format and began to somewhat describe the music. I wish you would have spoken about one or two individual songs, aside from the opener, but overall it soared upwards in quality.

So for now...I'll reserve judgement. I won't vote, because my vote would be "Is this review well written?" "Somewhat". You're like a youth team player in a sports team; you have the potential to be quite good, but right now you're lacking that extra inch.

Excuse the critique, but as one of the oldest still-active members here (in longevity and arguably age), I find myself inadvertently judging you young bucks "out loud". See, I used to be you once upon a time, too

ReturnToRock
February 23rd 2012


4805 Comments


@systemunfold: All That Remains, The Agony Scene, Trivium, Killswitch Engage, Shadows Fall, Unearth...

thechodewarrior
February 24th 2012


62 Comments

Album Rating: 1.5

@ReturnToRock

thanks a ton for your critique, i really enjoy writing reviews and i want to become better and your opinion really helps

ReturnToRock
February 24th 2012


4805 Comments


Here to help, young man, here to help



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