Review Summary: Songs in the Key of Love, Hate...and Masturbation?
If there’s one thing you should never do if you want to be taken seriously in the music industry, it’s to copy another band’s sound. It’s a mistake that many a now-forgotten group has made, and Puddle of Mudd is walking straight down that path with their failed attempts to become the modern Nirvana. And unfortunately, despite the illusion that this band may actually be decent created by singles such as “Blurry,” when you sit down and listen to their latest LP-
Volume 4: Songs in the Key of Love and Hate-you’ll find yourself wanting to slit your own throat with the disc just to make the music stop. Yes, it’s that bad. The instrumentation is just plain boring, the singer sounds like Kurt Cobain’s annoying, untalented, dick-headed brother who only got a record deal because of his famous sibling (think Danni Minogue), and you’ll be in for such lyrical genius as “I don’t wanna go to school today/I wanna stay home and masturbate.” Hell, the songs aren’t even catchy, which is often the only reason such awful radio friendly bands as this even build a fan base in the first place.
“Stoned” pretty much sums up Puddle of Mudd and proves everything I just explained as it kicks off the album. And, just in case the below-average instrumentation, lazy songwriting, annoying vocals and immature lyrics weren’t enough, it finishes with the sound effects of someone throwing up in the bathroom. It’s evident from this point onwards that
Volume 4 is going to be a rocky road.
And what a rocky road it is. For the most part,
Volume 4 consists of upbeat, fast-paced tracks such as “Spaceship” and “Pitchin’ A Fit.” But each and every one is slaughtered by Puddle of Mudd’s terrible, lazy songwriting, stupid lyrics (“All night long I’ve been thinking/Of how to get your clothes on the floor”) and bland instrumentation. The album goes progressively downhill as well, something I didn’t even think was possible, considering how far down the album is anyway. The rhythm section bores-the drumbeats and bass lines are all forgettable and often very much drowned out in a mass of simplistic droning guitars and probably one of the most annoying singers I’ve heard in recent times. He has practically no range at all-he essentially just whines for an entire album. And as if this wasn’t bad enough, they also shove their awful, childish lyrics down our throats as well.
And Puddle of Mudd is no better at ballads either. The three ballads get drastically worse as the album progresses (as do all the songs). The first-“Keep It Together”-is your typical radio rock ballad-only interesting to listen to because you can sit there and try and guess what the next line will be, or how the next bridge will go, or what the chorus will be like, and smile at how awful and predictable the song is when you get it right every single time. “The Only Reason” drones on and on obnoxiously, with its cheesy lyrics and standard, uninteresting progression. Last and probably least is Better Place. It’s immediately obvious that Better Place is the band’s attempt to write another Blurry-but they truly have run out of ideas. Literally every problem so far listed throughout the review is packed into this one song.
After this repetitive mess of an “album” we get closing track Hooky. I had hope for this track. Maybe they would end on a high note, a sign of better things to come. Well, I was wrong. The track sucks and what’s coming next is a damn covers album. Even as the first words are sung-lyrical masterpieces such as “I don’t wanna go to school today/I wanna stay home and masturbate” and “I don’t wanna go to school today/I wanna punch the lunch lady,” one wonders how this band ever expects to be taken seriously. What’s been apparent all along must finally be accepted. Puddle of Mudd have created the perfect album for angry, horny teenage guys in a desperate attempt to create a fun, dirty, shameless, no-apologies album.
And to be quite frank, I want an apology.
