Arcade Fire
Funeral


1.0
awful

Review

by 567ajt USER (3 Reviews)
June 27th, 2011 | 155 replies


Release Date: 2004 | Tracklist

Review Summary: Just read the friggin' review alright?

Upon searching Google, I came across several reviews of Arcade Fire’s debut album Funeral. All of them bled universal critical acclaim, even being heralded as a “concept album”. Upon hearing about this, I knew my mother owned a copy, so I put it on.

Spare my soul Jesus Christ.

I will have to admit, the packaging is different- actually quite unique. Even opening song Neighbourhood #1 (insert random name here) is ok. It does what an opening track does: sets the scene. There is one big problem though. That the track sets the wrong scene.

The scene it tries to set is one that these critics are apparently getting at. Those apparent themes of runaways and families being brought apart are nowhere to be found deep in the pretension of the 67-piece “alternative” rock band Arcade Fire. I mean alternative as a secondary option for overbearing crap on the radio. Prepare for the nausea.

Oh no Adam! You mustn’t forget their influences. Yes, it turns out Arcade Fire are “influenced” by good bands and completely dissect their formulas. It evident in the second track, where Arcade Fire show how easy it is to rip o- uh, I mean be “influenced” by Talking Heads. And just how easy it is for Win Butler to scream exactly like- uh, I mean “be influenced” by Frank Black’s signature scream.

Instrumentally, the songs go absolutely nowhere. Except of course most of the songs which have the signature Arcade Fire thing: making a boring dire song suddenly faster at the end. It happens most significantly during a boring and painful song saved only by a fast tempo outro. That is quite smart. However, this is recycled throughout the album. In fact I have only one problem with this outro:

WHY WASN’T THE BLOODY SONG LIKE THAT IN THE FIRST PLACE?!

And perhaps even worse, I can’t remember most of the titles of the songs. That is a big problem for me. Ok, there are probably worse albums out there. But at least I can name some songs from those people. Honestly, I can. I know the titles of Lady Gaga, N-Dubz and all the poser screamos on Scuzz. But at least I can remember the songs. That’s called making an impression. Arcade Fire make no impression on me. They are just dry, dire, pretentious and obnoxious conservative pre mature musical rats.

Sorry, forgot to take out the word “musical”.

As the first half closes with, uh, that song that sounds like the other songs, we are greeted with the second half with- you guessed it- another dry, “meaningful” song. Win Butler sings like he hasn’t grown up yet, yearning such classic lines as “Please forgive me”. No Mr. Butler, not even I can do that. Then when you thought the whole song was the same long, dirty affair, guess what? It finishes with everyone’s favourite Arcade Fire Outro!

What a waste of my ears. What a waste of my patience. WHAT A WASTE OF MY TIME!

But no, I mustn’t end there. The irony is about to kick in. The following track is entitled “Wake Up”. Yep, that’s right. It’s almost as if they know it’s boring so perhaps this song could be the saviour of the whole album. No, it’s not. Sorry, but it’s the SAME SONG! But of course with a different title. For a song entitled “Wake Up” it sounds like Arcade Fire are pissed off about something. Or maybe they are just flipping us the bird. God, what rebels(!)

Arcade Fire truly know how to close an album, eh? Their last three songs, one of them consisting of a very coked up lady yelling “Lies!” over and over again, are- well, shall I say it again?- exactly the same as before. Oh, and that “Lies” song was a single. The radio has been scarred for life ever since.

But oh no, the real thrill is the closing track In The Backseat. This time the lead vocals go to Win’s wife (and often his fellow sadomasochist). She sings about, well whatever the hell Arcade Fire sing about. After a cheap outro with novelty 60’s strings the album is over.

The horror…the horror.

There are but a few albums that changed my view of the world. Unknown Pleasures by Joy Division and The Holy Bible by Manic Street Preachers did it for me; the horrors of mankind and the notion of alienation are within these timeless gems.

Everything they described in those albums, all the atrocities of men, come back round to Arcade Fire. Dare I say it Funeral changed my view of the world: now I know people could steep this low to make an artistic statement with no actual message.

Funeral? No, not to me. The title of the album doesn’t sum it up. It’s more like Postmortem Of Charles Manson’s Body. Now that would be a soundtrack for a generation.


user ratings (4043)
4.3
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other reviews of this album
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Comments:Add a Comment 
conradtao
Emeritus
June 27th 2011


2090 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

Hard to say with a straight face that any of these songs are boring...



Not going to neg, since this isn't exactly badly written. But you don't back your points up very well at all.

567ajt
June 27th 2011


26 Comments

Album Rating: 3.0 | Sound Off

I know, I actually wasn't going to post this, because people would just say negative things about my review. Now, just looking at it, I think I have commited internet suicide. Oh fuck.

567ajt
June 27th 2011


26 Comments

Album Rating: 3.0 | Sound Off

"review kinda blows"



Thank you, i know. That's why i didn't want to post it.

IAmKickass
June 27th 2011


840 Comments


Than why did you post it?

eggsvonsatan
June 27th 2011


1087 Comments


Your mom has this album? How old are you, 7?

567ajt
June 27th 2011


26 Comments

Album Rating: 3.0 | Sound Off

Hmm, i'm kind of thinking that myself. Maybe it's because- um- honestly i don't have much of an excuse. I guess I have to take the mighty swipe of pissed off Arcade Fire fans now (which is...many. I'm dead).

G3N3R1C
June 27th 2011


1945 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

review has too many pos's.

Knott-
Emeritus
June 27th 2011


10232 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

I love reading vague and unstructured rants which are neither funny nor insightful.

Remer17
June 27th 2011


914 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

haha

clercqie
June 27th 2011


6521 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

What the hell is up with these negative reviews for albums I love, lately? First Unknown Pleasures and now this...

567ajt
June 27th 2011


26 Comments

Album Rating: 3.0 | Sound Off

Actually, I love Unknown Pleasures. All songs on that album are gems. I even said in the review I loved it. What I meant by those 2 paragraphs was that Unknown Pleasures is better than Funeral (but, knowing me, I don't shut up about my opinion). Shall i delete it?

clercqie
June 27th 2011


6521 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

No, I mean further down the page, there's also a neg review about Unknown Pleasures; it had nothing to do with your review.



I found it quite funny, although I completely disagree.

MarvellousG
June 27th 2011


368 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5 | Sound Off

I'll refrain from negging because of the Heart of Darkness quote.

psykonaut
June 27th 2011


3913 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

sigh

SharkEthic
June 27th 2011


585 Comments

Album Rating: 3.0

"Not going to neg, since this isn't exactly badly written."



I'm going to respectfully disagree.

qwe3
June 27th 2011


21814 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

The scene it tries to set is one that these critics are apparently getting at. Those apparent themes of runaways and families being brought apart are nowhere to be found deep in the pretension of the 67-piece “alternative” rock band Arcade Fire. I mean alternative as a secondary option for overbearing crap on the radio. Prepare for the nausea.





this is really such a bad paragraph dude. seriously. take out the apparentlys that'll prob help

BigHans
June 27th 2011


30952 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

lol

567ajt
June 27th 2011


26 Comments

Album Rating: 3.0 | Sound Off

Look, I appreciate your reaction to this review thejon93rd, which is understandable, but you can't say I listen to bad music. The reason for writing this review was for my vast disappointment of this CD. I thought it was going to be great, really I did. In fact, I listened to it again and again, to be open minded. And I have good taste in music thank you very much. I listen to Joy Division, The Cure, Pixies, Radiohead, Nirvana, Manic Street Preachers, The Fall. I thought this album would live up to those standards from what I've heard and what everyone else I know has said. Ok, perhaps I was going a bit over the top, but the point being this album doesn't do it for me. Maybe 1 star is way too harsh, but that's the way I see it. Oh, and I DON'T HAVE A GRUDGE WITH IT FOR BEING CRITICALLY ACCLAIMED. I am just greatly disappointed by Funeral. So, please, next time you give a negative reaction to my review don't bring my taste into it. Why would I even be on this site if i had bad taste? I love Alternative Rock, and this review is overly negative because i have high standards for something in that genre. Sorry if I appear that I should "listen to some more music". God.

G3N3R1C
June 27th 2011


1945 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

but you can't say I listen to bad music.




you 5'd a vampire weekend album, though, so yeah he can.

BigHans
June 27th 2011


30952 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

this album destroys Unknown Pleasures.



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