by SkinneeJay USER (9 Reviews)
July 26th, 2009 | 4 replies

Release Date: 2001 | Tracklist

Review Summary: One of the most average records ever.

My trip into the industrial (or, at least, Industrial Rock) was a little awkward. I enjoyed bands like Dope, Powerman 5000, Fear Factory and similar. However, I never could really get into the genre. Celldweller was also impressive but I couldn't get into it. Then, comes a typical period of depression. This period lead me to finally get into Nine Inch Nails, and it was a simple trip. Celldweller was great, Marilyn Manson too. Bands like Stabbing Westward and God Lives Underwater are also creeping up. Along comes Zeromancer, which I knew for a long time yet never checked out. With a cool name like that, and being industrial, they're supposed to offer something interesting.

It doesn't take long for "Doctor Online" to show Zeromancer, in fact, are a simple industrial band with no aim to try to venture. That's okay as long as you can keep me interested. Sadly, Zeromancer can't. "Doctor Online"'s hook is pathetic. The first 2 lines are catchy, but the last lines show Zeromancer had no idea who to continue the song. The title-track which comes after is even worse. It seems to take a trip down "Europe and money sucks". Yet it feels very contrived and cliche. Many bands said they hate money. There's nothing unique in that.

There's also pretty much nothing unique about Zeromancer other than their name. Fine, no matter how funny the title for "Need You Like a Drug", it's extremely catchy and can almost be a good single. "Chrome Bitch"'s chants of "Why do I have to put up with this?" is also good. Anything else? "Copula" and "Germany" are decent epic ballads. Are their ideas better than their execution? Yes. These songs are impressive in a way that makes you think "At least they're trying". Not because they're successful. When Orgy decided to make a ballad, they were successful in that ("Eva").

Most of the other songs on Eurotrash are average. "Plasmatic" and "Raising Hell" are pointless, somewhat enjoyable when you listen to the whole album yet they're longer than 4 minutes. Songs of average quality should never be longer than 4 minutes. "Philharmonic" rises a bit, but again we're talking about songs who don't really have an aim. At least Zeromancer can afford not to fall into the pit of bad songs. Other than the title-track, the only true bad song is "Send Me an Angel". It's a cover of a song by a band I don't know. I have to judge the song on its own and, well, it made me laugh. A definite skip.

The problem with Eurotrash is that it's unremarkable. It's true that I don't have much experience with industrial, but the band still feels like what Orgy would sound like if they didn't have any hooks. Although Eurotrash is able to pack a bigger punch at first than Candyass, Orgy were able to still have a good hook on every song and actual charisma. Zeromancer are unremarkable, boring, and don't have much to offer. Pick up Vapor Transmission instead.

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user ratings (37)

Comments:Add a Comment 
July 26th 2009


nice review, glad you are improving, there are a couple of awkward sentences but I know english isn't your first language so I'm not going to whine about that.

the songs I have heard from this really are painfully mediocre. i thought about getting the whole album, but since the songs I heard were boring as fuck I changed my mind and the review tells me I did the right thing.

July 26th 2009


i love doctor online. there is a rico remix which is even better than the original.

July 27th 2009


Album Rating: 2.0

yeah.. this album really isn't anything special.

May 26th 2020


Album Rating: 3.0

Its the beginning of theee EENNND

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