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06.13.18 an inexplicable urge to dance alone 01.31.18 unfashionably late 2017 idk
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an inexplicable urge to dance alone

it's 3am and it's raining because of course it is and

you're standing outside a club with a cigarette listening to the music emanating, coming to you distorted by distance and layers, and
Deleted Seniors

the feeling of atomisation and some kind of fundamental disconnect with the joyous twirl of bodies
3Organ Tapes

shimmering and rippling before your eyes, oscillating oil-black puddle
4Omar S
Just Ask the Lonely

washes over you, uninvited to this gathering, unwelcome
Hard II Love

you make a token effort to dance but the pills have worn off, fuck knows where your friends have gone, you checked your pocket earlier at you're out and you feel so conscious of dancing, of the way you body is moving and mingling among others,
6Gwen Stefani
Love. Angel. Music. Baby.

that you can't lose yourself in it like you could earlier. you decide to leave after they play just one song you can dance to and Hollaback Girl comes on and you shake and writhe and expend every last sliver of energy you have until the track finishes and, enervated, you call it a night
7James Ferraro

absolutely traipsing through a layer of the inferno and cries and arguments with taxi drivers recede and

the McDonalds are full but not with dancers but with the homeless, the profoundly isolated, the night owls, the out of step, and you wonder if they too are recalling better days or -- worse -- they have no better days to recall, that life has been a series of disappointments, injustices, infelicities, that their spectral existence too is for nothing
9Mark Templeton
Scotch Heart

memories resurface
10Mark Templeton
Jealous Heart

you forgot about this one: an argument with a partner over something stupid, cutting words, tears, if only you could take it back -
11Mark Templeton
Gentle Heart

you forgot about this one too: binge-watching Master of None, not leaving bed all day other than to pay the poor pizza delivery man, knowing the tender touch of someone is there even while you sleep
12Gyorgy Kurtag
Kafka Fragments, Op. 24

sometimes you wake up and you feel the unmistakable imprint of another person on you, a shape that fits into yours, so you turn over to cuddle but instead
13Alessandro Bosetti
Her Name

it's a towering pile of books; evidence of culture, hobby. it feels like an artifice, a proxy through which to relate to others rather than -- i mean god forbid you ever be sincere
14Aaron Dilloway
Modern Jester

the phantasmal command the streets you walk tonight, taking the form of fog and shape of incorporeal murmurs. the disembodied chorus has receded. it's you fighting through the ghouls tonight, and only when that's been achieved
15Arthur Russell
World of Echo

can you turn the key in the lock, start your record player, and finally give into the inexplicable urge to dance alone
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