|27 Worst black metal albums I've heard|
I've heard a lot of BM and wanted to show you the fucking worst of it
Disclaimer: I don't really go out of my way to listen to "bad" black metal so most of these are like 2's until you get to the very bottom where the real dingy shit is
Death From The Forest
Absurd fucking blow. 11 LPs, 11 EPs and only like 4 of them are any good. This isn't one of them
What a waste of good art, at least other bands put this same painting to better use.
Dark Funeral have 2 good albums, their first and their latest. Everything else is an absolute waste of time. If the album art isn't dark blue and painted by Necrolord, fucking skip it
|5||Via Dolorosa / Der Sturmer|
Long Journey to the Truth / Night and Fog over Fin
This spot is actually for a 3 way split with Der Sturmer, Evil and Nacht und Nebel. But this EP split fucking blows too, Der Sturmer are a pretty 3/5 BM band overall but every split I've heard them on is bottom of the barrel material from them. At least they don't include that shit on their LPs, mostly.
L'Odeur des déportés
Completely forgettable NSBM
|7||Forest Of Harambe|
Under The Sign Of Harambe
There was a time and a place when this album was actually really funny, but beyond that it's just a bad album. But forgivable because it was a meme album thrown together quickly.
...And Don't Deliver Us From Evil
These guys had some killer DSBM in their early days, but failed experimentation with adding other subgenres to the mix ended up with this mess of an album. Melodic DSBM'n'Roll. That's a lot of genre descriptors to say 2/5 at best.
Third Scourge from Darkness
Bad name, good art, bad album. One man project that is okay at best on the early material and dog doo later.
The Fire of Awakening
Graveland have a brajillion albums and most of them are pretty good. In their middle period though they started getting really boring and bad. I don't care if music is NS, but don't be boring bad "triumphant" NS.
Spears of Heaven
I don't remember this at all so it sucks
Really fucking boring atmoblack. Like waaaaaaaay too much bad atmo. The atmo here wen't bad, return it
|13||I Shalt Become|
The Pendle Witch Trials
This album isn't actually that bad, it's just coming off of some pretty fucking good albums before it. It's only saving grace is that it isn't as bad as their next album
|14||Keep of Kalessin|
Ok these guys fucking own, Through Times of War and Armada are a couple of my favorite meloblack albums. Reptilian misses the mark so fucking hard though, and the followup Epistemology isn't much better.
|15||Mortem Parto Humano|
Nitimur in Vetitum
What the fuck even is this
Mareridt slaps cock, M does not. Terrible bad album that deserves any hate it gets, but the followup fucking taps taint and should be jammed.
Prosatanica Shooting Angels
Nargaroth is a project of extremes, at best he owns p fuckin hard in his attempt to pay homage to the BM legends of past, and sometimes he just fucking sucks ass and makes bad bland BM that should never be jammed. Herbstleyd destroys dong though, so check that album out.
|18||Thou Art Lord|
Hellenic mediocrity incarnate Thou Art Lord's worst album. Stupid name, stupid art, bad riffs, bad vocals
Sworn to The Dark
Watain fucking suck. Full stop. Garbage ass bottom of the barrel chicken mcnuggies BM you got at the Micky D's inside of a Walmart. Their absolute best album, Casus Luciferi, is barely good. And nothing else they've released comes anywhere close to it. If you like these guys more power to you but god fucking damn, there are much better "safe" BM bands that deserve all the fame these R slurs get.
Rabid Death's Curse
Trident Wolf Eclipse
Probably the worst of the lot. Horrible album, easily the worst black metal of 2018 and maybe the worst album I've heard so far this year. Edit: I just checked ya this is the worst of this year along with Crematory and Disnomia's new albums.
I like when shit bands release a split with themselves
Out Of The Dungeon
Absurd's worst album. There is nothing redeemable about this release. This hot garbage combined with the rest of Absurd's lower end of their discog solidifies them as probably the worst BM band ever with more than a handful of releases.
In the interest of not being a negative nancy, Totenlieder fucking slaps, and so does Der Fun and Blutgericht. If this band only had those 3 and like a couple shit releases, they would be pretty solid.
Attera Totus Sanctus
I've said all I have to say about DF, just listen to the first and latest.
|26||I Shalt Become|
Horridly performed atmoblack with long neoclassical segments that go fucking nowhere. This band started to nosedive with The Pendle Witch Trials but who could have predicted the dive would take them straight to a fucking 90 degree angle to the second worst BM album I've ever heard. Avoid at all costs, it almost taints everything good they ever did.
Here it is, the worst black metal album I've ever heard. How these guys ever released another album after this crock of shit is beyond me but somehow they released 3 more and they are all actually pretty fucking fantastic, albeit 1 has art that could wind you up on a watchlist. These guys are like a fucking garbage late 90s industrial knockoff Cradle of Filth but instead of Dani shrieking they just fucking moan and wail over shitty instrumentation for 50 minutes. It might be worth jamming as a laugh but nothing beyond that. Out of over 5200 ratings, this is somehow my one and only 1.0 black metal album. It's that bad.