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User
Reviews 2
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Last Active 07-28-19 5:55 am
Joined 06-30-13
Review Comments 3,053
| Hellraiser ranked and recent jams
Probably a few controversial placements but oh well. Not ranking the albums, they’re just what I’ve had on repeat lately in no particular order. | | 1 |  | Wisp (US)
If Not Winter
Hellraiser (1989)
Easy pick for number one. It’s dark, salacious, grimy, and sets a standard that none of the others could hope to meet. 4.5/5 | | 2 |  | Slothrust
Wildcard
Hellraiser: Inferno
I saw this one described as “Hellraiser meets David Lynch” and while I’m not sure that’s completely accurate, it’s a good enough description. A neo-noir descent into madness detective story, it’s the only sequel that grabbed me nearly as much as the original, even if it’s very different in tone and style (the writer and director insist it was written as a Hellraiser film, but fans generally insist it was a reworked spec script. Personally I trust that they’re telling the truth about the origin). 4/5 | | 3 |  | Tallah
Primeval: Obsession // Detachment
Hellbound: Hellraiser II
A solid follow up, and does the best job of any movie with exploring and expanding the lore. Leviathan and the Labyrinth are visually haunting, and it is a good film in and of itself. It just doesn’t reach the heights of the original, and a few times I couldn’t suspended disbelief (Kirsty wearing her step-mother’s skin, for one). 3.5/5 | | 4 |  | Purity Ring
Purity Ring
Hellraiser: Bloodline
Second-best lore expansion, going into the origins of the puzzle box. The movie is held back by its budget and runtime (86 minutes to tell a three hour story), but despite the limitations it delivered a satisfying “end” to the story of the four theatrically-released films. If it had been allowed a longer run time, or been split into multiple films to give the three stories breathing room, it could have been so much more. Also just want to say that the space station’s explosion was extremely similar to the Borg Cube from Star Trek: First Contact but actually came out 8 months earlier. 3.5/5 | | 5 |  | Deer Fang
Blossom
Hellraiser: Revelations
Written and filmed in 19 days to keep the license, it’s also very much a product of its time and an enjoyable popcorn flick. I can absolutely see why it’s usually ranked last or second to last, and it has the worst of the four Pinheads. Is it a good film? Absolutely not. Did I enjoy watching it? Yes. 3/5 | | 6 |  | President (UK)
King Of Terrors
Hellraiser III: Hell on Earth
This one just felt like more of the same. It’s not *bad*, but do anything particularly well either. The more tech-related cenobites were intriguing conceptually but not well executed, looking like knock-off Borg (oh hey they’re back) than an evolution of prior designs. 2.5/5 | | 7 |  | Gnaw Their Tongues
Genocidal Majesty
Hellraiser: Deader
Another that usually ends up at the bottom of the list for people, but I felt it was the strongest of the three Bota films. The Hellraiser parts were the most blatantly tacked on to a spec script, and just like his other two it relied heavily on jarring jumps between hallucinations and real life. The concept of a cult finding a way to access the realm of the cenobites to become immortal is intriguing. But even when he’s working with a good idea, Bota’s execution still isn’t great. 2.5/5 | | 8 |  | Superfine
Immaculate Rejection
Hellraiser: Hellworld
Absurdly false-advertised. You go into it expecting the cenobites to have mastered the internet, and found more people than ever to inflict their pain upon with a digital puzzle box. But really, the game doesn’t even exist. Literally the only thing we see of it is someone getting an invitation to a party for players and a few Pinhead soundbites. It’s basically Hellraiser: I Know What You Did Last Summer, with more teen drama acted out by twenty-somethings than Hellraiser content, and aside from the last seen that Hellraiser content is filtered through a mid slasher lens. Again, we’re treated to constant jumps of “OH NONE OF THAT WAS REAL! Or… was it?” But of the three, it justified those moments the best. I don’t think I would ever watch this outside of a full-franchise rewatch. 2/5 | | 9 |  | Lorna Shore
I Feel The Everblack Festering Within Me
Hellraiser: Judgement
The writer of Revelations had wanted to do this instead, but didn’t feel he was given the time to give his story justice. Yeah, no amount of time working on this could have saved it. The cenobites are now actual, from Hell, demons. They put people on trial for their sins and then “purify” them. At least, in the five scenes they actively participate in. Otherwise, we’re treated to “post-Saw Se7en, but with the 10 Commandments instead of 7 Deadly Sins.” I would probably have given that movie, stripped of all Hellraiser elements, a 3 or 3.5. But the misuse of the cenobites, underutilization of the second-best Pinhead actor, and laughably bad “cenobites vs an angel” segments bring it down. Again, unlikely to watch again outside a full re-watch. 2/5 | | 10 |  | Lustmord
Heresy
Hellraiser (2022)
This was a massive letdown. I went into it having heard nothing but good things, and my how I was let down. It takes elements of three prior films (Hellbound, Hellworld, and Hellseeker), throws them in a blender with every modern horror cliche, and stretches the thin result out to two hours. I saw a joke that “Miramax had a habit of taking two hour movies and making 80 minute ones out of them. I think this crew decided to try and balance the scale by doing the reverse” and that’s a good way of describing it. It’s also the highest budget film in the entire series, leading to it being over-polished. On top of that, we have to wait around an hour and a half for a fully on screen kill. It takes Hellseeker’s lore expansion, and tries to expand on *that* in completely uninteresting ways in Hellworld’s mansion. It bills itself as a reboot but offers no feeling of a being a franchise starting place (it also has no backstory). And cenobites look like plastic mannequins. Con’t | | 11 |  | Rasputina
Oh Perilous World
Hellraiser: Hellseeker
The first, and worst of the Bota films. We get three separate sets of worlds we jump between, with the constant question of which is real? Turns out, none are. Tried to bring back Kirsty, and decided to make her a terrible person while also giving her 4 minutes of screen time. Jacob’s Ladder wannabe, and I would skip it even on a franchise rewatch. 1/5 | |
TheGreatQ
10.01.25 | Hellraiser (2022) con’t: the last ~25 minutes are some good Hellraiser content, but can’t make up for everything that came before. The casting choices for Riley and Trevor were the only ones that I felt were good, but even then the characters were the blandest of stock content. 1.5/5 would not watch again
Anyways, happy October and I’m looking forward to Hellraiser: Revival next year | AlkemestRedux
10.01.25 | I read The Hellbound Heart in the last year and it's interesting see(d)ing what they left out of the original film. I'll have to check out some of the sequel movies eventually. | TheGreatQ
10.01.25 | I really need to give it a reread and then check The Scarlet Gospels | cycosynner
10.01.25 | So excited to see this list tbh. Love these movies.
I'd order them as follows. Haven't brought myself to watch 2022 yet.
(1) Hellbound: Hellraiser 2
(2) Hellraiser: Inferno
(3) Hellraiser (1989)
(4) Hellraiser: Bloodline
(5) Hellraiser III: Hell on Earth
(6) Hellraiser: Hellworld
(7) Hellraiser: Hellseeker
(8) Hellraiser: Revelations
(9) Hellraiser: Deader
(10) Hellraiser: Judgment
Judgment deciding to just randomly drop all the Heaven/Hell lore still pisses me off and I watched these movies last three-four years ago. | AlkemestRedux
10.01.25 | The Scarlett Gospels seem pretty awesome too. I've been reading through Barker's stuff over the past couple years and everything I've read so far has been great. I liked Weaveworld so much I bought a physical copy of it! | Christbait
10.01.25 | 2022 had potential but it failed to create any tension or any sort of perverse sensuality that made the original so compelling. I really liked Jamie Clayton as the new Pinhead but it was far too sterile for a horror movie. When you have films like Terrifier 2/3, Evil Dead Rise, etc. that are incredibly popular and incredibly viscerally violent, you're given permission within the Hellraiser franchise to do the same thing. | TheGreatQ
10.01.25 | Sterile is a very good description for it, yeah.
@cycosynner love to see someone else with Inferno at number 2! | RVAHC13
10.02.25 | Only reason I watched 11 was because dean winters was in it, but even he did nothing to save it from being the stinker that it was | budgie
10.02.25 | im gonna do a hellraiser marathon only seen og and remake | Rowan5215
10.02.25 | I just finished reading Books of Blood and ordered a bunch more Barker books, goddamn he's great
to think... I hesitated |
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