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12.19.08 Never Be A D.J...11.16.08 Welcome List

Never Be A D.J...

After spending almost 10 years in music, spinning records in garages with buddies and playing songs at ecstacy-filled rave clubs, I've picked out some embarrassing moments... possibly playing the wrong song at the wrong time...
1Britney Spears

2008 - My girlfriend's (uh-um, ex) birthday. She's quite the metal freak, thats what I loved most about her. Honestly, where on earth would you find a NORMAL and BEAUTIFUL chick who likes Cannibal Corpse? Unfortunately, I got the wrong tips from her best friend and ended up playing this. Well, from that moment on I wasn't allowed to speak to her until I apologized and gave her back 4 minutes of her life. I'm still trying to work on the latter.

2001 - My step-brothers wedding. I was elected to play as the romantic musician guy, and my father gave a handful of Lionel Richie songs to play. I loaded them straight onto my Windows Media Player, but thanks to the fuckin' playback option, it ended up changing to Slipknot when the bride was walking down the isle. Having the lead singer scream "fuck you all!" didn't exactly appeal to the old ladies and paranoid women in the crowd.
Principles Of Lust

1999 - Ever did a gig in a night club filled with homosexuals? I couldn't resist the offer, and plus the cheque was huge! About midnight came, I decided to turn things up a bit with "Principles Of Lust", who we all know is the grand master of sexual eruption songs. The next 10 minutes followed by grown men touching each other, and going into a weird sexual trance. That night I puked and cried myself to sleep. No amount of money was worth what I saw.
4Dimmu Borgir
Tormentor Of Christian Souls

2006 - Halloween, a time of scaring little kids half to death, and hey, what better way to do it then play evil, twisted, satanic music when you see them approach your driveway? My song choice was terrifying, alright, but I scared one kid so bad he ran out into the street crying and was nearly hit by a car.
5Rage Against The Machine
Wake Up

1997 - I was still in college, and doing a neat little presentation about secret government agencies and how they affect the public. My speech was bloody good, but my song of choice was Wake Up. Once my slideshow was done with the song, the teacher got up from his desk and immediately called the principal, who then phoned my parents on account of "discriminative music in assignment". I agree, the message was a bit dodgy, but hey, its mutherfuckin' Tom Morello!
6Katy Perry
I Kissed A Girl

2008 - Club Nova was packed, even for a cold winter night, and girls still threw their tops off. I was the lucky DJ, and decided to spin a few Prodigy tracks. The crowd boo'ed, and demanded Katy Perry. I had the song in my collection, and played it... for 5 hours straight, and nobody complained. Now, I bet half of the girls in the club actually did what the song said when they got home.
7Daft Punk
Around The World

1999 - This song was still fresh as hell for the time, I admit, but maybe overplayed it a bit too much while working at a club in Kimberley. Infact, I loved it so much that I actually did 14 remixes. Safe to say, nobody enjoyed themselves.
8Plain White T's
Hey There Delilah

2007 - A few friends of mine and I decided to take a trip down to Cape Town for the holidays. Yet again, I packed the wrong CD's into the compartment box, and we ended up listening to Plain White T's all the way there. If only there was a nicer word for torture...
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