tectactoe
09.22.21 | Optimal three-topping pie for me is Bacon + Green Pepper + Roasted Garlic, shit is absolutely cash money. |
widowslaugh123
09.22.21 | Gotta be a particular roasted garlic. Some shitty brand roasted garlic can absolutely destroy a whole pie |
Purpl3Spartan
09.22.21 | Agreed for most part but why pepperoni so low |
Havey
09.22.21 | Prosciutto, basil, garlic |
Avagantamos
09.22.21 | correct pepperoni oppinion |
Colton
09.22.21 | top tier: goat cheese, feta cheese, mushrooms, spinach, garlic, crushed red pepper flakes, pesto sauce, parmesan cheese
everything else sucks
|
Havey
09.22.21 | tuna |
Ryus
09.22.21 | god tier: anchovies
/thread |
evilford
09.22.21 | Beef is me fave |
tectactoe
09.22.21 | 'Agreed for most part but why pepperoni so low'
It's just such an overrated and overused topping. Overall taste of pepperoni is mid at best and so all it does is get the pizza extra greasy. (Yes bacon releases grease, too, but bacon is delicious and the bacon grease soaks in and also tastes great.) |
WeepingBanana
09.22.21 | One of the best pizzas Iāve ever had in my life was topped with mashed potatoes
White clam pies are the best tho
Also anchovies rule and at the very least you need to include them in your red sauce
Also I love a sunny side up egg in the middle of my pizza w a runny yolk to dip in |
tectactoe
09.22.21 | 'Gotta be a particular roasted garlic. Some shitty brand roasted garlic can absolutely destroy a whole pie'
True. Consider my tier list under the running assumption only top quality ingredients used. |
Aberf
09.22.21 | > god tier: anchovies
How very cultured of you sir. |
Colton
09.22.21 | idk why as a man, you would ever put artichoke hearts on your pizza. tf is it that you "heart" so much? cock???? |
tectactoe
09.22.21 | I don't mind the underlying flavor of anchovies but they're too damn salty. May as well just add a salt lick to your pie.
I do love a sunny side up egg, too, though I tried to limit the toppings to "somewhat" popular ones. I guess egg could be added, tho. That would be very high tier for me. |
tectactoe
09.22.21 | 'idk why as a man, you would ever put artichoke hearts on your pizza. tf is it that you "heart" so much? cock????'
Don't mind artichoke hearts _generally_ but they are dreadful on a pizza, and taste like shit when baked all willy-nilly in the open like that. Same with eggplant and pineapple actually. I love those foodstuffs but not on a damn pizza fer chrissakes. |
Ryus
09.22.21 | "I don't mind the underlying flavor of anchovies but they're too damn salty. May as well just add a salt lick to your pie."
thats why you gotta combine it with somethin like basil and roasted tomatoes |
WeepingBanana
09.22.21 | Eggplant pizza is great
In general tho the quality of a pizza is way more determined by the sauce and crust than by the toppings. Toppings are nice but if the foundation sucks then the whole thing sucks |
tectactoe
09.22.21 | Agree 100%. Whenever visiting a new pizza place for the first time I always get their version of a margherita, just to get a feel for the crust and sauce. If those suck, no amount of glorious toppings can salvage. |
Emim
09.22.21 | Olives are a top pick for me, same with bell peppers. I love a good combination pizza. |
WatchItExplode
09.22.21 | White sauce spicy sausage peppers red onion. Ever since I started making homemade flatbreads with that combo the fam looks at me different. |
WeepingBanana
09.22.21 | If anyone has the displeasure of driving thru CT you absolutely have to get pizza in New Haven. May be obvious advice but it really is the best in the world. And yes Iāve tried every pizza in the world |
Aberf
09.22.21 | https://v.redd.it/0pyftk2nd4f71 |
tectactoe
09.22.21 | I have had some good white sauce (blanca) pizzas but at what point do they become not pizzas, but flatbreads? I mean I guess you could argue that 98% of toppings would invalidate the product as true "pizza" but I'd say at the very least you need to leave the base ingredients - leavened dough made from wheat and tomato-based sauce - alone. |
WeepingBanana
09.22.21 | Tomato sauce is definitely not necessary for it to be pizza lol. The best pizza of all time, the white clam pie at Pepeās in New Haven, doesnāt have red sauce |
tectactoe
09.22.21 | I'm not saying that it's "technically" not pizza, I'm just saying it feels a little disingenuous to me, to call it a pizza when you've gone and switched one of the two ingredients it's essentially built upon. You can (and others will/have) argue that any sauce will do. But is crust smothered in e.g. barbecue sauce and topped with grilled chicken and dollops of sour cream a "pizza" in your eyes? Where do we draw the line?!? |
WeepingBanana
09.22.21 | Yeah Iād call that pizza, why not? Just kind of a know it when you see it situation
I guess if I had to lay down ground rules Iād say itās a typically high hydration dough cooked in an extremely hot oven with things on top of it as it cooks. I canāt really think of any other food category that that could be confused with based on those rules. Tho Iām sure there are exceptions to those rules that Iām not thinking of |
tectactoe
09.22.21 | "artisanal flatbread" |
Josh D.
09.22.21 | green pepper god tier? as in bell pepper? we gotta neutralize this freak |
WeepingBanana
09.22.21 | Pizza crust kind of is flatbread. I mean an argument can be made |
WatchItExplode
09.22.21 | I take one pizza dough ball chop it in half boom two flatbreads. I get that there are those pizza purists out there but why would you want to do that to the most universal and fun food? |
Trifolium
09.22.21 | Every Italian ever is turning in their graves. |
WeepingBanana
09.22.21 | No theyāre not |
tectactoe
09.22.21 | I am merely playing devil's advocate. Idgaf what you call it as long as it tastes good. |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
09.22.21 | List is OK but artichoke hearts in shit tier and green peppers in god tier is just absolutely preposterous |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
09.22.21 | You know for a fact the only pizza colton eats is a ketchup base with ham and extra mild cheddar |
WatchItExplode
09.22.21 | Now you're talking. I have no doubt somebody out there has a pumpkin spice dessert pizza promotion right now. I also totally get how a good margherita pizza is not really part of the same conversation as a lot of this stuff.
Sounds like hot pocket pizza pots... |
Colton
09.22.21 | potsā pizza: generic mozzarella cheese, liquified propecia base, pepperoni, onions, garlic and powdered rogaine flakes |
Colton
09.22.21 | dipped in overwhelming tattoo regret |
Winesburgohio
09.22.21 | God Tier: Anchovies, Asparagus, Calamari, Olives |
Satellite
09.22.21 | Pepperoni + Hatch green chile or fuck off |
Sinternet
09.22.21 | le ebic bacon lmao |
Havey
09.22.21 | if u visit sweden remember to try kebabpizza xD |
Aberf
09.22.21 | is bacon the most overrated food ever? |
tectactoe
09.22.21 | Imagine not liking bacon. Itās not MY fault a bunch of fucking fedora donning, basement dwelling neckbeards turned it into a meme. |
ArsMoriendi
09.22.21 | @tec: you ever have broccoli rabe on a pizza?
I like bacon, but I prefer it super crispy, and I feel like it'd be mushy on pizza. |
WeepingBanana
09.22.21 | Bacon is fine but def overrated and not a great pizza topping. Would rather have a sweet smoked sausage if thatās the flavor profile Iām going for |
Colton
09.22.21 | bacon is a stupid food and a stupid concept |
ArsMoriendi
09.22.21 | Sausage and chicken are prob the best meat pizza toppings
Both go well with broccoli rabe ;) |
Ryus
09.22.21 | had a pizza recently with italian sausage, fresno chiles, and krispy kale. shit slapped |
Colton
09.22.21 | best dip is creamy garlic/caesar. blue cheese is also good but it's gotta have a good viscosity to it none of that watery shit. worst is ranch |
Colton
09.22.21 | but I also feel like the normalization of dip with pizza has directly contributed to an increasingly gluttonous and instant gratification addicted society that has entirely lost touch with the concept of moderation and self control. we used to just dip the crust. now we gotta dip every goddamn bite like fucking animals. I miss how it was but there's no going back now |
Ryus
09.22.21 | ive never dipped my pizza in anything in my entire life so idk what youre talking about |
Winesburgohio
09.22.21 | Colton youre mad as a meat axe!!! I have no idea what you mean |
Colton
09.22.21 | you guys have gotta be fucking with me there's no way you've never had pizza with dip |
Drifter
09.23.21 | im a pepperoni kinda guy |
Colton
09.23.21 | bunch of puritanical mfs itt |
JeetJeet
09.23.21 | Pineapple belongs in the top tier
Also you're smoking dick if pepperoni is bottom tier |
tectactoe
09.23.21 | Have had broccoli rabe but never on pizza. Seems like itād be oddly bitter on there but everything is worth trying at least once I suppose.
Also if you need to dip your pizza, somethingās wrong with your pizza š§ |
Colton
09.23.21 | swear to god I don't know anyone who doesn't have dip with pizza maybe it's an ontario thing? |
ArsMoriendi
09.23.21 | "the normalization of dip with pizza"
Maybe if you only eat Pizza-Hut tier pizza this is a thing |
Colton
09.23.21 | you're from new york you know nothing about pizza |
Ryus
09.23.21 | nice bait colton
new york pizza>>>> |
Colton
09.23.21 | new yorkers live in this weird bubble of pizza clout that blinds them to what they're actually eating |
Colton
09.23.21 | best pizza comes from regions that aren't recognized for their pizza at all. that way people have something to prove |
ArsMoriendi
09.23.21 | "Have had broccoli rabe but never on pizza. Seems like itād be oddly bitter on there but everything is worth trying at least once I suppose."
It's bitter anywhere, but idk it's like a good bitter and meshes well against the sweetness of the sauce |
Ryus
09.23.21 | yeah buttfuck nowhere, canada actually has the best pizza |
Colton
09.23.21 | a pizza could be made with gerbil piss as the base instead of tomato sauce and new yorkers would gobble that shit up and rate it 5 stars because they have to maintain that new york pizza pride |
Ryus
09.23.21 | nah ive had plenty of subpar ny pizza |
ArsMoriendi
09.23.21 | A weird baseless claim that could be used in anyway and be as logical^
Hmm lemme try:
a baguette could be made with gerbil droppings as dough instead of wheat and Parisians would gobble that shit up and rate it 5 stars because they have to maintain that Paris baguette pride
see how silly you sound Colton? |
Colton
09.23.21 | you guys don't even dip your pizza. it's automatically so much worse right off the bat because of that, even if NY has some mythical pizza cooking methods that nobody else knows, you're having a worse dining experience than me |
Ryus
09.23.21 | hmm
no |
Colton
09.23.21 | it's like when Bjork made Medulla cause she was confident that just her vocals were enough to carry an album but really if she just added some quality instrumentals we could have had a more worthy successor to Vespertine. that's you guys with your dipless pizza |
ArsMoriendi
09.23.21 | Medulla is really good though, and its own animal, bad example |
Colton
09.23.21 | I can concede that new york pizza is its own animal but it's a shitty animal like a mole rat or a possum |
Winesburgohio
09.23.21 | "you guys don't even dip your pizza" |
Colton
09.23.21 | pretty sure most pizzas here automatically come with dip |
Ryus
09.23.21 | yeah thats not a good sign for the quality of the pizza lmao |
Colton
09.23.21 | bet you guys also don't put sauce on your steak cause it's "not a good sign for the quality of the steak" or some shit |
ArsMoriendi
09.23.21 | Actually yes...
Steak sauce detracts from well made steak
Salt and pepper's all you need unless it's like a skirt steak marinade or like chuck steak |
ArsMoriendi
09.23.21 | Fuck, now I'm imagining Colton drowning a porterhouse in A1 |
Havey
09.23.21 | americans cant even into banana curry pizza |
ArsMoriendi
09.23.21 | @Havey: I Googled it, and NYC apparently has some places that do it
But I gotta ask: why do they use bananas when plantains are better for cooking? |
Colton
09.23.21 | sauce makes every food better. theyāre the best part about eating |
ArsMoriendi
09.23.21 | Don't get me wrong my favorite food of all time (pesto) is a sauce
And I like making sauces in general, but uh... it's not meant for every food, especially the jarred shit |
tectactoe
09.23.21 | do not bring bb Bjƶrk into your shenanigans, Colt.
also Detroit pizza is best pizza. |
tectactoe
09.23.21 | ā sauce makes every food better. theyāre the best part about eatingā
Colton iām about to blow your mind but pizza actually already has sauce ON it š® š® š® š¤Æ |
ArsMoriendi
09.23.21 | I've never had Detroit pizza, but I'd be interested in trying it |
tectactoe
09.23.21 | I am biased because I have lived in metro-Detroit my whole life so āDetroit style pizzaā is basically just āpizzaā at most places around here. Itās basically pizza with a much thicker crust that stays soft and chewy in the middle but gets crispy and crunchy on the edges because itās (supposed to be) cooked in a steel pan. |
ArsMoriendi
09.23.21 | Hmm Interesting
As long as it isn't like Buffalo, NY pizza. That shit's horrible. Used to go to college in Buffalo and the native Buffalonians were so proud of it despite it tasting hardly better than the fast food stuff. |
Ryus
09.23.21 | i had detroit pizza once and i was not rly a fan t b h |
tectactoe
09.23.21 | Understandable. Iām a bread kinda guy, tho, so I love a thicker crust as long as itās done properly. |
Sinternet
09.23.21 | americans thinking they have better pizza than actual italians lmao |
Colton
09.23.21 | "I love a thicker crust as long as itās done properly."
pretty sure bread that's literally burnt isn't done properly |
tectactoe
09.23.21 | Colton just admit you eat your pizza with alfalfa sprouts and plain tofu cubes and gracefully bow out before you embarrass yourself any further |
Colton
09.23.21 | tofu on pizza could be good if it was cooked right. never tried it. man up and try yours with dip next time though |
tectactoe
09.23.21 | What dip do you recommend.
Only accoutrement Iāve ever added to pizza is hot sauce. My wife uses ranch but that shit looks so gross. |
Koris
09.23.21 | Dip pizza in eggnog, it really compliments the cheese |
Colton
09.23.21 | caesar dressing/garlic dip |
Colton
09.23.21 | or blue cheese |
Colton
09.23.21 | ranch is the worst sauce in the world imo. literally tastes like expired milk |
WatchItExplode
09.23.21 | My favorite to go is a Thai pie with spicy peanut sauce chix peppers green onion mandarin oranges. What can't be a pizza? It's beautiful. |
Aberf
09.23.21 | "americans thinking they have better pizza than actual italians lmao"
But people's taste is like, you know, subjective right? |
fogza
09.23.21 | Thicker pizza and pizza with dip both sound wrong.
|
Colton
09.23.21 | if you guys haven't had dip with pizza you're actually out of your mind |
fogza
09.23.21 | If you're going to dip your pizza in some gloopy dip it might as well be anything. Buy a focaccia or something. It's like those disgusting fast food pizzas where people slather it in BBQ sauce or mayo or something, and the pizza is literally slimy and soggy |
chemicalmarriage
09.23.21 | Deep dish is the shit. Pizza pie |
Colton
09.23.21 | people eating oil fried bread topped with heart disease inducing amounts of melted cheese, topped with red meat and more cheese, but dip crosses the line |
fogza
09.23.21 | "Deep dish is the shit. Pizza pie"
^ š¤® |
fogza
09.23.21 | I've always thought the trick of a good pizza is putting just the right amount of cheese, topping and sauce on the thinnest base possible so it doesn't seem over the top. Clearly I was wrong, it's about having a pot of blue cheese whip that I can then dip my whole complete flavour profile into and overwhelm it. |
fogza
09.23.21 | Oh and who fries good pizza bread in oil, you put it in a wood fired oven |
Colton
09.23.21 | " it's about having a pot of blue cheese whip that I can then dip my whole complete flavour profile into and overwhelm it."
this but unironically. once you try it you can't go back. not having dip is like choosing to use $10 gas station earbuds instead of good headphones so you don't overwhelm your ears |
fogza
09.23.21 | LMAO Colton. The man who makes NOTHING with sauce likes his pizza dunked. Go figure. |
Colton
09.23.21 | i make everything with sauce that's my whole point |
chemicalmarriage
09.23.21 | Fogza is the coolest guy at the party |
fogza
09.23.21 | I'm pretty sure I saw a photo of some wraps you made, no raita in sight. And some weird dry burger patty things. Could be I missed the sauce, it was probably in a bowl next to it, you probably have plain pasta and dip each strand individually. |
fogza
09.23.21 | "Fogza is the coolest guy at the party"
I'm not sure if this is ironic, because if I'm being truthful and honest, this has never been the case at any party I've attended š |
tectactoe
09.23.21 | Deep dish pizza isnāt terrible but it also really isnāt pizza. It doesnāt hit the same. Itās more like a casserole or an actual, literal pie. |
Demon of the Fall
09.23.21 | green pepper in 1.
black olive in 3.
Oh man. |
tectactoe
09.23.21 | Whatās with all the green pepper hate? It is a top tier veg next to broccoli and itās earthy sweetness complements pizza perfectly. |
outliers
09.23.21 | Stopped reading after "goat cheese" |
Demon of the Fall
09.23.21 | 'It is a top tier veg next to broccoli'
Keep digging... |
Ryus
09.23.21 | roasted tomatoes is an S-tier topping btw |
tectactoe
09.23.21 | I could see roasted or sun roasted tomatoes being higher tier; had it a few times and itās been great. The roasted element adds a flavor component that isnāt there with regular (raw) tomatoes, which ends up being not bad but redundant.
Also, Demon, you donāt like broccoli either? The fuck? What kinda veg you eat? If you say corn and carrots are your favorite veg you will confirm that you have the palate of a ten year old. |
Pikazilla
09.23.21 | Anchovies on pizza are fucking disgusting |
Ryus
09.23.21 | im telling ya
best pizza: anchovies, basil, roasted tomatoes
shit's fire |
fogza
09.23.21 | My fave pizza is bacon, rosemary and fresh tomato put on after the pizza is cooked. |
WeepingBanana
09.23.21 | I can see why people donāt like green peppers. Theyāre def bitter. But when theyāre balanced out with other stuff theyāre real nice. Wouldnāt say theyāre top tier by any means tho
Not liking anchovies is forreal the biggest poser alert tho |
Rowhaus
09.23.21 | How can you put banana peppers over pepperoni and jalapenos |
WatchItExplode
09.23.21 | Red or orange bell peppers over green every day of the week |
WeepingBanana
09.23.21 | I agree with that ranking. Briny/pickled stuff on pizza is always a plus (hence anchovies). Steak and banana peppers is a classic combo for me |
WeepingBanana
09.23.21 | Sometimes you gotta have the bitterness of the green tho. I feel like just red or orange with something fatty like sausage or bacon would just end up too sweet and rich. The green really rounds it out |
Demon of the Fall
09.23.21 | 'Also, Demon, you donāt like broccoli either? The fuck? What kinda veg you eat?'
Oh I eat it, but a top tier veg it ain't. You can't be seriously putting it up there with the likes of aubergine, courgette and asparagus? These aren't votes for pizza toppings by the way, although I'd use all of them over broccoli. |
tectactoe
09.23.21 | Asparagus is also top tier. And while I love zucchini, Iād put broccoli over it most days. Eggplant is merely OK for me. Iāve had some really nasty, mealy eggplants that have kinda soured me on them over the years. Though I still love a good eggplant parm or baba ghanoush. |
Colton
09.23.21 | there's an indian place near me that makes a cauliflower dish so good that it automatically propels cauliflower to the best vegetable ranking. I had heard people hype up cauliflower before but this stuff is truly next level |
WeepingBanana
09.23.21 | Is it cauliflower pakora or do you mean in some curry or something? Pakora rules, especially with cauliflower. Reminds me of fish and chips for some reason (when the batter is good). Anyone fuck with cauliflower crust pizza? Obviously not very good but as far as abominations go itās not that bad if youāre on a diet |
Colton
09.23.21 | hmm the only pakora I've had is this kind my grandma makes which is different than this cauliflower thing I'm describing but it might technically be pakora I'm not really sure |
Colton
09.23.21 | https://ibb.co/cCq2Svq |
WeepingBanana
09.23.21 | Interesting. Indian food is so complicated |
Colton
09.23.21 | it can be, but a lot of the best stuff is actually pretty simple |
WeepingBanana
09.23.21 | I mean more itās just so varied. Feel like Iāve seen a million different ways to make the same thing, and also a million different variants on those things. Or how you can have a 12 spice masala but if you adjust the amounts of a few, toast some but not others, etc make a few tiny permutations you can end up w a completely different flavor profile |
WeepingBanana
09.23.21 | And thatās just within curries. Not even considering all the breads, chutneys, raita, chaats, and desserts. And thereās prob hundreds of things Iāve never even heard of |
tectactoe
09.23.21 | Palak paneer š©šš» |
Colton
09.23.21 | very true banana. and you can mix everything with everything
palak paneer has a very interesting ratio of visual grossness to deliciousness |
tectactoe
09.23.21 | Also love some bhindi masala, too. One of the few ways in which Iāll eat okra. |
tectactoe
09.24.21 | Okra on pizza tho š¤¢ |
WeepingBanana
09.24.21 | Big fan of chili chicken lately. It hits that perfect junk food/take out itch. Also found a new place that makes by far the best dal makhni Iāve ever had so lately thatās been my fav Indian food
Forreal tho any recs on cauliflower crust pizza brands? Iāve made it myself a few times but itās wayyyyy too much work for something thatās ultimately disappointing. Just trying to be a tad healthier lately and if I can sub out like 1 out of every 4 pizzas I get with cauliflower crust then thatās good enough for me |
Colton
09.24.21 | I think convenience is a big part of sustainable healthy eating patterns, so if itās a ton of work, it probably wonāt work long term. maybe just eat more cauliflower and then have pizza separately
also pizza is super unhealthy regardless and adding cauliflower wonāt negate that |
cold
09.24.21 | Just went to a place yesterday that had brussels sprout pizza, so there's that |
Rowhaus
09.24.21 | I think trying to turn pizza into health food is a fool's errand. That's just me. I like keeping those worlds apart. |
WeepingBanana
09.24.21 | I do eat fairly healthy, and donāt have pizza very often, but if I could find a cauliflower crust that doesnāt make me wanna end it all and that satiates me enough so that it increases the amount of time between real pizzas thatād be good. First and foremost I should probably drastically reduce how much I drink lol
Love Brussels sprouts but itās hard to imagine that working on a pizza logistically |
WeepingBanana
09.24.21 | I have no illusions about it being a health food lol but if I can cut out the lions share of carbs and like 300 (thatās an estimate) calories by doing that sure why not |
outliers
09.24.21 | "also pizza is super unhealthy regardless and adding cauliflower wonāt negate that"
not really. buy premade whole wheat or Cauliflower pizza crust and make it yourself. Takes 2 minutes of prep to make and you obviously can control how much cheese you put on it. I like pesto and light cheese on thin whole wheat crust with lots of veggies. |
cold
09.24.21 | best of all timeeeeeee
https://www.zorchpizza.com/ |
Rowhaus
09.24.21 | Basil pesto is the shit no doubt. I put that stuff on anything I can. |
Egarran
09.24.21 | Making a pizza I don't get the impression that I'm dealing with a super unhealthy thing.
But maybe all those nice ingredients together fuse into some murderous substance. |
Colton
09.24.21 | pizza is just inherently unhealthy. it's just oil soaked bread coated in cheese. the ratio of omega 6 to omega 3 fats, and the high presence of trans fats in the cheese does not make your arteries happy. if you eat a bunch of pizza and then go do cardio after you can literally feel your heart working overtime to compensate |
Storm In A Teacup
09.24.21 | I always feel it is healthier if it is thin crust and light sauce. My old ass would feel bloated and heartburn if I had a couple thick heavy sauces slices. |
WeepingBanana
09.24.21 | If your goal is weight loss, which =/= healthy mind you, cauliflower crust basically takes care of that whole aspect |
Colton
09.24.21 | lol what |
WeepingBanana
09.24.21 | Iām no dietician but isnāt it basically consensus that low carb is the best way to lose weight? Tomatoes, cauliflower and cheese are all extremely low carb |
Colton
09.24.21 | no, not even remotely |
Colton
09.24.21 | you need to be in a calorie deficit to lose weight which pizza does not help because it's packed with calories |
WeepingBanana
09.24.21 | Yeah Iām not disputing that, but in terms of what macro is better to cut basically every resource I can find says carbs. Can you link me any research that says otherwise? |
Colton
09.24.21 | macros don't determine how much fat you lose, only a calorie deficit does, regardless of macros. cutting carbs can cause you to lose water weight when you first switch to a low carb diet, but not actual fat. losing water weight won't actually make you healthier and more often than not it's not sustainable long term anyway |
WeepingBanana
09.24.21 | Like if youāre an average person trying to lose weight with the stipulation that pizza is your cheat meal, and youāre also the kind of person where cauliflower crust can at least partially give you the illusion that youāre eating pizza, then Iād say thatās a pretty decent part of your game plan, no? |
WeepingBanana
09.24.21 | Oh okay I see weāre at the point of the discussion where youāre not reading what Iām saying. All good bro |
Colton
09.24.21 | not really because it's still gonna be high in calories either way because of the oil and cheese. it will reduce the calories which can help weight loss but it won't be a significant difference, and it would be the reduction in calories that helps you, not the reduction in carbs |
Colton
09.24.21 | oh you're upset now lmao |
porcupinetheater
09.24.21 | Shit tier:
Pizza |
WeepingBanana
09.24.21 | Okay can you link me to anything saying that itās better to cut fat and/or protein than it is to cut carbs as a way of cutting overall calories? Cause literally everything I can find says the contrary |
Colton
09.24.21 | it literally doesnāt matter, calories are calories. if your goal is simply to reduce your caloric intake then it doesnāt matter which specific macros you cut, you just have to reduce your calorie intake. this is common knowledge. some ppl will argue itās better to cut carbs because fat and protein are more filling, but ultimately itās maintaining a calorie deficit that allows for weight loss. you can eat nothing but carbs or nothing but fat and as long as youāre in a calorie deficit you will lose weight |
Colton
09.24.21 | https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Caloric_deficit |
Colton
09.24.21 | all three macronutrients contain calories so you can reduce any of them to reduce your calorie intake which will lead to weight loss if you are in a deficit |
WeepingBanana
09.24.21 | āsome ppl will argue itās better to cut carbs because fat and protein are more fillingā
Yeah this is my point and basically everything I can find, Wikipedia or otherwise, says it has a higher success rate |
Colton
09.24.21 | it might have a higher success rate for people who struggle with their appetite, but to claim that eating cauliflower crust will take care of weight loss entirely is completely untrue because you're still eating a fuckton of calories with the cauliflower crust from all the oil and cheese. at the end of the day the calorie deficit is all that matters, regardless of how you achieve it. it's like how a lot of people can run for a longer period of time if they listen to music while they do it, but listening to music doesn't actually burn calories, it's the running that does that. so eat whatever macros you want, but if you're not in a deficit you won't lose weight (unless it's water weight, which really doesn't matter much. you can lose 10 pounds of water weight in 2 days if you really want but it won't make you healthier) |
Colton
09.24.21 | then there's also the fact that reducing carb intake reduces your intake of fruits and vegetables which contain vital micronutrients that most people already don't get enough of |
WeepingBanana
09.24.21 | Okay well good thing I didnāt say that! |
Colton
09.24.21 | "If your goal is weight loss, which =/= healthy mind you, cauliflower crust basically takes care of that whole aspect" |
Cryptkeeper
09.24.21 | Reddit thread |
tectactoe
09.24.21 | Cheese is not unhealthy |
tectactoe
09.24.21 | It is very calorie dense but it is not unhealthy. |
Colton
09.24.21 | cheese is one of the least healthy things you can eat man. unfortunately, it just happens to be probably the best tasting too |
Colton
09.24.21 | nothing with 0.3g of trans fat for a 120 calorie serving is close to healthy |
WeepingBanana
09.24.21 | I think itās pretty obvious I meant the whole aspect of cutting carbs from pizza. Iāll try and be more painstakingly explicit in the future |
tectactoe
09.24.21 | Also in my long experience with lifting (and therefore going through cut and bulk cycles following strict calorie goals and limitations), you will never make a ālow calorieā pizza that will satisfy the craving of the real thing. Iāve tried everything.
Years ago I started following strict 6 days a week, then one day per week eat whatever I want. Thatās when Iād have stuff I was craving like pizza and ice cream and buffalo wings lol. Never hindered my weight loss, just have to slightly lower your weekly calories by a little to account.
Bulk cyclesā¦.thatās a different story. Used to eat a full Digornio pizza followed by two bagels and a pack of pop tarts for dinner. No wonder my blood sugar runs high now. |
Colton
09.24.21 | yeah that is obvious Banana cause that's exactly what you said. my point is that cutting some carbs from pizza does not make it good for weight loss because you're still consuming a ton of calories... |
Colton
09.24.21 | yeah tec I used to be the same, if I was on a bulk I never really cared about how healthy I was eating, until I started doing a lot of cardio and I was like damn I gotta clean my diet up. cheese is the hardest thing for me to cut out |
tectactoe
09.24.21 | Naturally occurring trans fats are not the same as manufactured trans fats and do not have the same detrimental effects on metabolic health because theyāve not been artificially hydrogenated. |
WeepingBanana
09.24.21 | Surely youāre not saying cauliflower and flour are equally as caloric are you? |
Colton
09.24.21 | no they're not, that's why I specifically noted multiple times that it's the reduction in calories that will help you, not the reduction in carbs. ironic that you told me I'm not reading what you say |
tectactoe
09.24.21 | One sample does not a conclusive study make, but Iāve been eating cheese routinely, quite literally every single day in the range of 3 to 5 oz per day (84 to 140 g), sometimes more on cheat days lol, and my cholesterol levels are (knock on wood) one of the few bodily metrics of mine that have remained great over all this time. |
Colton
09.24.21 | "Naturally occurring trans fats are not the same as manufactured trans fats and do not have the same detrimental effects on metabolic health because theyāve not been artificially hydrogenated."
they're not as bad but they're certainly still quite bad. there's a reason dietary groups that don't consume trans fat have much lower levels of heart disease and higher life expectancy |
Colton
09.24.21 | it's likely your cholesterol levels have been kept within a healthy range by living a healthy lifestyle and working out so much |
WeepingBanana
09.24.21 | Reduction in calories by way of reduction in carbs, which is a more successful strategy for most people, which I said like 6 times lol |
Colton
09.24.21 | yeah but you're still eating pizza. it has a ton of calories either way. having a leaf of spinach with 3 bowls of crack doesn't make for a healthy night |
WeepingBanana
09.24.21 | Woah really?? |
WeepingBanana
09.24.21 | Anyways, whatās yāall favorite frozen pizza brand? Was a big fan of Newmanās but I feel like theyāve been fucking w their product lately and Iām looking to switch. Donāt say digiornos |
Pizza
09.24.21 | basil, sausage, and pepperoni. |
tectactoe
09.24.21 | I disagree. Iāve seen no studies indicating a direct link of naturally occurring trans fats to increased risk of heart disease. This was long believed true for saturated fat as well and has since been debunked many times. In many of the studies Iāve seen that attempt to point to āfat = badā, the control group also has a diet high in processed carbohydrates and hydrogenated oil and things that have been proven time and again to absolutely be detrimental to cardiac health. Sugar, refined carbs, and hydrogenated oils are the biggest players, largely because a majority of people donāt know what āmoderationā means.
If you have a study that links *naturally occurring* trans fats to increased risk of heart disease without confounding factors like sugars and refined carbohydrates and such, Iād love to see it. Iām not aware of one that exists because Iām not sure such a study could even accurately be conducted. |
Storm In A Teacup
09.24.21 | If you ever want someone to argue something for you cuz you're too lazy just hire Corkon. |
Storm In A Teacup
09.24.21 | "you but you're still eating pizza"
š¤£ idk even know why but š¤£ |
WeepingBanana
09.24.21 | āIf you have a study that links *naturally occurring* trans fats to increased risk of heart disease without confounding factors like sugars and refined carbohydrates and such, Iād love to see itā
Wikipedia link to ātrans fatsā page incoming |
Colton
09.24.21 | https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2830458/
"This review provides the first quantitative comparison of the effect of ruminant trans fatty acids and CLA with that of industrial trans fatty acids on blood lipoproteins in humans. Our analysis shows that all three classes of trans fatty acids raise the ratio of LDL to HDL, and therefore, presumably, the risk of coronary heart disease. The effect of ruminant trans fatty acids and CLA on the LDL to HDL ratio was less than that of industrial trans fatty acids although the difference was not significant." |
Colton
09.24.21 | "Most of the trans fatty acids in milk and meat consist of vaccenic acid and other trans-mono-unsaturated fatty acids similar to those found in partially hydrogenated vegetable oils (figure 1). Our results suggest that all such fatty acids with a double bond in the trans configuration raise LDL and lower HDL cholesterol. Removing all such ruminant trans fatty acids from the diet would lower the total trans fatty acid intake in the United States and Europe by about 0.5% of energy [9], [64] and might therefore reduce cardiovascular disease risk by 1.5 to 6% [5]. Such a specific removal of ruminant trans fatty acids from milk and meat is, however, technically not feasible. Our results do reinforce the widespread advice to reduce intake of ruminant fats, because these are also the major source of saturated fatty acids in affluent diets. Recent changes in dairy cattle feeding have led to milk with a lower content of saturated fatty acids and a higher content of cis-9, trans-11 CLA and other dairy trans fats [65]. Our data suggest that the effect of these changes on heart disease risk in consumers of milk and meat fat are at the very least equivocal." |
MillionDead
09.24.21 | Pepperoni doesnāt deserve this active libel. |
tectactoe
09.24.21 | "CLA is a minor animal trans fatty acid. The effect of dietary CLA on cholesterol will be negligible if we assume that our model is correct."
https://chriskresser.com/can-some-trans-fats-be-healthy/
https://www.dairynutrition.ca/nutrients-in-milk-products/fat/natural-trans-fats |
tectactoe
09.24.21 | Let us also not forget that something that "raises your risk of cardiovascular disease by 3%" is exactly that - it raises *your risk* by 3%. Meaning if you theoretically have a 6% risk of cardiovascular disease, you now have a 6.18% risk. (I'm not saying that justifies eating like shit, my point is that evaluating a true increase in risk at such an attenuated level is subjective or, more often, merely confounding.) |
Colton
09.24.21 | sure, but a 6% risk reduction for the most common cause of death in the world is hugely significant, and itās also not as black and white as just āyou have heart disease or you donāt.ā An unhealthy diet will impact your overall health in many ways before it actually becomes full on heart disease. Itās like how eating a high sugar diet is bad for you, even if youāre not full on diabetic |
Colton
09.24.21 | but my main point was that trans fats, natural or artificial are bad for you and the studies show that |
tectactoe
09.24.21 | Iāve listed two articles that each link to various studies showing the exact opposite, though, which has to do with the chemical composition of the TFAs when produced in a factory vs. naturally occurring in a cowās stomach.
At the end of the day, too much of anything is bad for you. Hell, too much protein can fuck up your kidneys. And a big part of why trans fats fucked up so many people is because they were in EVERYTHING. When we all wrongly assumed saturated fat was the enemy, common products were being pumped with partially hydrogenated oils to compensate. And the masses were substituting large portions of their diets with that crap.
The trans fats that occur from ruminant byproducts account for a much smaller percentage of the total fat content by comparison. (And, on top of that, as I maintain, they do not affect your metabolic health the same negative way.) So assuming they did have the same negative effect, the quantity would be much lower almost inherently. Even diets heavy in meat and cheese (like my own lol) donāt culminate nearly as many total TFAs as someone who uses margarine or seed oils in their cooking.
All of this, of course, is only exacerbated because a majority of the population doesnāt exercise or maintain a āhealthyā lifestyle. Thereās no doubt that someone who runs daily, or lifts weights, or swims for an hour each day and each their vegetables and fruits and vitamins will all be able to handle a larger ceiling of TFAs (or anything ābadā for that matter) than someone who sits on the couch all day and has never seen broccoli in their life. Health problems usually work like compounding interest. |
tectactoe
09.24.21 | (And if the TFAs naturally occurring in meat and dairy were indeed the direct causation for increased cardiovascular disease, youād have an entire nation of Keto-ers dropping dead from strokes and heart attacks by now lol.)
|
Colton
09.24.21 | that source doesn't appear to actually even support your argument tbh
"In a crossover study by Motard-Belanger et al. (47), healthy men (n = 38) consuming a high-iTFA diet (10.2 g/2500 kcal, 3.7% of energy) led to significantly higher LDL-cholesterol (LDL-C) compared with moderate intake of rTFA (4.2 g/2500 kcal, 1.5% of energy)."
this makes no sense to me, why would they compare a high artificial trans fat diet with a moderately high natural trans fat one. Of course the high artificial one will be worse
it then says "High intake of rTFA (10.2 g/2500 kcal) also led to significantly higher LDL-C compared to a diet low in TFA from any source (control; 2.2 g/2500 kcal, 0.8% of energy) or moderate rTFA." which supports what I'm saying |
Colton
09.24.21 | "(And if the TFAs naturally occurring in meat and dairy were indeed the direct causation for increased cardiovascular disease, youād have an entire nation of Keto-ers dropping dead from strokes and heart attacks by now lol"
we do, heart disease is the most common cause of death in the world |
Colton
09.24.21 | but I also agree with the point that in moderation it's probably fine if you live a healthy lifestyle. I eat a decent amount of cheese too. but it's not healthy |
Storm In A Teacup
09.24.21 | Hey...wait a minute...why is that really good underrated Blink album representing the shit tier?!? š¢š¤ |
tectactoe
09.24.21 | ā we do, heart disease is the most common cause of death in the worldā
This is a purposely misleading statement as a corollary to what I said. The lionās share is people dying from heart disease are not following a strict Keto dying, controlling their body weight, and exercising regularly. |
tectactoe
09.24.21 | "Although limited, feeding studies in rodent models, with either induced or spontaneous dyslipidemia, do not support adverse health effects of VA on markers of CVD risk. Furthermore, findings suggest that VA supplementation may improve dyslipidemia by lowering circulating TG and/or cholesterol and attenuate atherosclerotic progression."
"Results from epidemiological studies generally have shown an inverse or no association between rTFA intake and CHD across multiple geographical locations."
"In conclusion, although data from experimental models suggest that rTFA may beneficially affect risk of CVD and cancer, further research is needed to determine the effects of VA and c9,t11-CLA in humans as well as clarify the isomer-specific effects of CLA." |
tectactoe
09.24.21 | At the end of the day it doesn't matter what any generalized study says, though. Health varies quite literally from person to person. My anecdotal contribution to this conversation was that I eat a ton of cheese daily (as well as lots of meat and nuts) and my LDL and HDL cholesterol levels (as well as their relative ratio) has remained good. (Hope I didn't just jinx myself there.)
Meanwhile, my blood pressure and blood sugar numbers were not quite so good. When I cut out most sugars and a lot of refined carbs (which included the additional intake of more cheese, meat, and dairy to fill out my diet), those numbers got better and my cholesterol essentially remained unchanged.
There are simply too many compiling (and unknowable) factors at play for each individual to make any precise conclusions. I guess my point is that cheese is not inherently unhealthy. It is perhaps unhealthy for someone *who is already unhealthy* to eat. But if you are "healthy" and maintain a healthy lifestyle otherwise, high cheese and meat consumption is not going to affect you. |
Egarran
09.25.21 | Well said.
Colton has to change his mind now. |
kalkwiese
09.25.21 | Gud list, I agree with most of it
Salami really isn't a good topping imo, very overrated |
tectactoe
09.25.21 | Yep, salami is just Neiman Marcus pepperoni.
(For the record I like salami in general, just not on pizza. Salami sandwiches were my shit back in grade school.) |
kalkwiese
09.25.21 | Yea, salami is nice, but i don't like the texture it gets from getting baked. Raw salami that's out on the pizza before serving, that's a different thing. |
Ryus
09.25.21 | the only good pepperoni is the thick-cut ones that curl up |
Parallels
09.25.21 | If it doesn't a meat button that curls then it isn't even real pepperoni.
Also the goat cheese must be smoked and on a BBQ pizza. |
Egarran
09.25.21 | That's a sexy sentence |
EyesWideShut
07.02.22 | pepperoni with EXTRA pepperoni IN the crust !! |
pizzamachine
07.02.22 | Onions are god tier fuck yo life |
Purpl3Spartan
07.02.22 | True |
evilford
07.02.22 | True [2] |
tectactoe
07.02.22 | Honestly I would consider putting them in God tier. They are definitely a god tier food overall, on āza maybe *slightly* less so, but Iād have no qualms with seeing them in either of the top two tiers honestly. |
Cimnele
07.02.22 | why's einsturzende neubauten so low giggle |
pizzamachine
07.02.22 | Based |
tectactoe
05.23.24 | updated |
Winesburgohio
05.23.24 | i will stop at nothing until you see the light re: anchovies. u gotta come over. pizza a la Wines |
mouldypigeon
05.23.24 | List is gonna make me cry
ctrl+f "nduja" 0/0 |
Ryus
05.23.24 | nduja is the good stuff
my god tier would be anchovies (#1 forever), garlic, basil, italian sausage, broccoli rabe |
Zac124
05.23.24 | All you need on pizza is cheese. Toppings are just overkill. |
tectactoe
05.23.24 | cheese bread yum |
MillionDead
05.23.24 | This is absurd |
Zac124
05.23.24 | 'cheese bread yum'
It is indeed. Why add extra to something that is already perfect? |
tectactoe
05.23.24 | āWhy have something great when you can have something merely good?ā |
evilford
05.23.24 | Agreed, that's just logic right there |
Zac124
05.23.24 | More does not equal better, especially when something is already perfect. You can't make something more perfect. |
evilford
05.23.24 | While that's kind of true, "perfection" is nearly unattainable. Not common at all, not all things that rule are perfect
Wierd convo tho let's eat š |
Rowhaus
05.23.24 | pass the red pepper flakes fam |
Zac124
05.23.24 | @evilford True, but if something is perfect I am pretty sure it would be the classic cheese pizza. |
evilford
05.23.24 | Hmmmm cheese za is underrated fs but my personal pick would honestly have to be chicken bacon ranch za. As close to perfection as pizza gets 4 me |
evilford
05.23.24 | Also tec thanks for having onion in god tier, based af |
YoYoMancuso
05.23.24 | the spinach disrespect saddens me : ( |
tectactoe
05.23.24 | Onion is a god tier food in general honestly. I go through about 2-3 red onions in a week. I use them on literally everything. Salads, wraps, sandwiches and burgers, sauteed with chicken, in stir fry, on hot dogs or with sausages. |
Typhoon24
05.23.24 | italian sausage top tier. it and green pepper imo. |
Rowhaus
05.23.24 | Team onion 100%
My weirdest thing with pizza is I vastly prefer tomato sauce over any other. I won't turn down white sauce, bbq, pesto, etc. but nothing is on par with a zesty red sauce. It doesn't feel as much like pizza without it. |
Ryus
05.23.24 | yeah white pizza is the worst |
Typhoon24
05.23.24 | it's gotta be tomato or its nasty af |
Rowhaus
05.23.24 | definitely my least favorite yeah, and if you do another sauce I think it's better to drizzle over the top than make it the foundation |
tectactoe
05.23.24 | Not a fan of BBQ pizza at all tbh. White sauce isā¦fine. If paired with very specific toppings. Red sauce all the way. |
tectactoe
06.27.25 | Yeah this list is still pretty much accurate. |
ArsMoriendi
06.27.25 | "my god tier would be anchovies (#1 forever), garlic, basil, italian sausage, broccoli rabe"
Ryus with the best take...except I hate fish so I guess not the chovis
Pesto on pizza sorta doesn't work because pesto is supposed to be RAWWWWW and when you bake it onto a pizza it cooks. Not terrible though since at the end of the day basil+parm+garlic+pine nuts+olive oil still all taste good cooked together |
ArsMoriendi
06.27.25 | BBQ pizza is an abomination, much like BBQ chips
Like that setup is for ribs or grilled chicken, but it doesn't belong on pizza |
tectactoe
06.27.25 | You can add basil either very late in the cooking process or even once the pizza is out of the oven proper. (Gotta julienne it or something if you're gonna do that, though.)
Agreed BBQ pizza is ass. |
Demon of the Fall
06.27.25 | Anchovies, feta, black olives are all top tier |
Colton
06.27.25 | my friends and I get a pizza we call the death pizza sometimes. it has a pesto base, with mushrooms, double feta, double goat cheese, pepperoni, crushed red pepper, oregano and garlic sauce dip |
ToSmokMuzyki
06.27.25 | is this account going for a record of worst tier lists ever or |
Rowhaus
06.27.25 | Never in my life have I seen a sunnyside up egg on a pizza |
Koris
06.27.25 | "Dip pizza in eggnog, it really compliments the cheese"
Damn, what the hell was I smoking back in 2021 |
budgie
06.27.25 | camembert best topping |
gabba
06.27.25 | in truffle we trust |
trilo
06.27.25 | bacon being above bottom tier invalidates this list sorry very mid pizza topping |
budgie
06.27.25 | yeah bacon on pizza is a bit much |
