|Bass that rattles my colon.|
These are artists and albums that play bass solely to fuck my digestive tract.
When the bass only parts kick in in Jordan or Kerosene... I imagine that's what burning taint sounds like.
Sleep's Holy Mountain
Phantasmal spectre of Al Cisneros my butt collides.
At around 4:30 into Transmissionary, I'm pretty sure Brian Gibson discovers a new element.
|4||The Jesus Lizard|
The Arse of Self-Defense.
As brilliant as Fetch is, I think they made the wrong call in not using a live bassist. Rika Hamamoto gets such a hnnnnng sound going right off the bat.
Two Nuns and a Pack Mule
Monobrow and Up Beat are a two-pronged kick in my teeth.
McLusky Do Dallas
What We've Learned is that I should be wearing diapers when making this list.
By golly mister, I can't wait to show off this fun and not at all sphincter-decimating bass tone off to my playmates and school friends!
You know that bass is cooked just right when it gives off that bllrrrrt sound.
Earth 2: Special Low Frequency Version
Y'know, I just discovered that you can't spell bass without ass. Funny, huh?
The middle of Cockroaches is the exact same sound I make on the shitter the morning after downing a case of cheap lager. I think Henry the Serial Killer might've been on to something.
Cause For Alarm
Oh he shot his load alright.
Not only a super underappreciated album (by Coroner standards), also a super underappreciated bassist in Ron. Vocalist-bassists just get it, y'know?
You Say I'm Scum? Well at least I don't tune my snare to basketballs.
Welcome to Hell
Cronos is the coolest dude ever, fight me. Just look at his bass playing genius https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RAIco_CTtwo
The Complicated Futility of Ignorance
The gold standard of fecal sounding bass everywhere.
Drench me in it.
In the Sign of Evil
Sepulchral Voice rattles my last two remaining brain cells so hard.
|19||Sick of It All|
Just Look Around
Ass Pain Strikes Again.
Welcome to Sky Valley
Bass sounds so good that the guitars wanted to turn into it.
Fuck Wonder Woman, this shit should be shown to every little girl out there to prove that if you try hard enough, you can expose Billy Milano for the little bitch he is https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PbQAc0P2BI4
Seriously, Kaori Okumura is like the best bass-playing vocalist out there (which, by the way, is the best kind of vocalist). Her shrieks know just perfectly what her bass is doing to my butthole.
At Action Park
Pull The Cup out of My Black Ass, why don't ya?
Independent Worm Saloon
Tapeworms make humans enjoy music 16% more, science finds. Contact your local tapeworm vendor today!
I don't speak speak Portugese, but I'm pretty sure Ratamahatta is about diarrhea.
|25||Stormtroopers of Death|
Speak English or Die
Billy Milano may be a bitch, but he hangs with Dan Lilker a lot which makes him an okay dude.
Through Silver in Blood
This albums artwork looks like something ithe bass on it made me shit out.
Whatever the fuck they are doing for bass in that album, it defo tickles by colon.
My Ass Is On Fire is a god-tier song, but unfortunately the best bass on the album is on the track following it. Listening to The Girls Of Porn on a bus is what open-design headphones are made for.
The Land of Rape and Honey
Al Jourgensen when he still prioritized butt stuff over cowboy hats.
Outhouses need some lovin' too, y'know.
En Esch can totally rock a dress (no pun intended).
Urge to Kill
Brainbombs is my hangover spirit animal.
|33||Nine Inch Nails|
Pretty Hate Machine
I know it's dated af, but it's be a Sin to leave it out. Get it? Get it!?
Too Many Humans
Now this is proper shitting music.
No One Rides for Free
Not only is Snakebellies a GOAT song, it also has the grooviest bass ever to make it's way down my lower intestine.
Louder! I'm almost done!
Nuclear warheads up me butt!
Bringin' It Down
It helps if you punctuate each bass note with the toms.
I wish I had blue blood coarsing through my veins, then I could have some peasant clean up my bathroom after me.
This should really be on every list regardless of what they are.
I never know if Ty Segall is a wanker or a cool dude. Stuff like this makes me lean towards the latter.
|42||Youth of Today|
Break Down The Walls
Every time they give the bass even a little room to breathe, I poop a little.
War Crimes (Inhuman Beings)
These fuckers got a Peel session and it was supreme.
This got me over the edge. I'm done.
Ace of Spades
You didn't think I'd actually leave this off the list, did you?