JesperL
jesper
Emeritus

Reviews 220
Approval 98%

Soundoffs 141
News Articles 62
Band Edits + Tags 174
Album Edits 204

Album Ratings 2452
Objectivity 76%

Last Active 06-23-23 12:04 pm
Joined 03-15-16

Review Comments 5,841

 Lists
12.27.24 jesper's top 50 albums of 2024 12.22.24 jesper's top 50 songs of 2024
12.04.24 spotify wrapped 2024 12.28.23 jesper's top 50 albums of 2023
12.23.23 jesper's top 50 songs of 2023 11.29.23 spotify wrapped 2023
10.25.23 what's a perfect song06.27.23 kim petras lyric or not
12.28.22 jesper's top 50 albums of 2022 12.25.22 jesper's top 50 songs of 2022
11.30.22 spotify wrapped 2k22 06.22.22 would aoty 2022 be aoty 1652
05.11.22 aicollins15 04.11.22 User's 5 Choices Reviews REVIEWED
02.21.22 Beach Houses Ranked12.28.21 jesper's 2021 top 50 albums
12.14.21 jesper's 2021 top 50 songs 12.11.21 wake up babe
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The Oceans Ranked
516 Horsepower
Secret South


The Southern Ocean

Super generic and boring ocean, many view it as an extension of other oceans rather than its own thing. But hey, some experts or whatever said this is an actual real life ocean, so here you go buddy, last place for you.
4Like Pacific
In Spite of Me


The Pacific Ocean

Just too goddamn big. Like, chill, there's really no need to cover a third of the earth's surface. Also absolutely terrifying because of how deep it is; 36,200 feet to be precise! Not sure how deep that is because I'm European and exclusively speak kilometers, but it sure does sound deep and like it would encompass a lot of weird freaky fish and stuff. Yikes.
3Arctic Monkeys
Whatever People Say I Am, That's What I'm Not


The Arctic Ocean

A very decent ocean, but still crashing into third place because it seems a tad cold. Also, it's kind of pathetically tiny. But I think there's either penguins or polar bears (definitely some funky seals) vibing there so it's all good, very respectable ocean.
2Twin Atlantic
Free


The Atlantic Ocean

Another rather obese ocean, but not as arrogantly immense as its Pacific counterpart. What really sets this one apart, however, is its sheer range. Like, damn, Atlantic's islands include both Ireland and the Canaries? Go you! A well deserved second place.
1From Indian Lakes
Absent Sounds


The Indian Ocean

Without a doubt the best ocean there is. Not too big, not too small. The Indian Ocean is very chill: it's simply doing its ocean thing without disrupting others or showing off too much. A lot of cool underwater mountain ranges can be found here, but, most importantly, Madagascar is a proud participant of its waters! I have seen all seven (yes, there are actually seven) Madagascar films and I can confirm that it's a very good time. Congratulations to The Indian Ocean!
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