Butkuiss
I always knew jazz fusion had potential. Snarky Puppy reached that potential
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Album Ratings 3059
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Last Active 09-25-21 12:42 pm
Joined 09-19-10

Review Comments 7,733

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Metal Genres That Don't Actually Exist

You heard me.
1Helloween
Walls of Jericho


Speed Metal doesn't exist. It's usually just thrash with a vocalist who can actually sing, or power metal with a vocalist who can't.
2Blasphemy
Fallen Angel of Doom


"War Metal"? We already have a name for that. It's blackened death with shit production.
3Dream Theater
Images and Words


Metal bands with progressive tendencies exist, sure, but what people like to think of as the codified genre of "Progressive Metal" is usually just Power Metal In 7/8
4Bathory
Hammerheart


"Viking Metal"? Yeah, a lyrical theme doesn't make a musical genre. It's either the power metal end of folk metal or it's the black metal end of folk metal.
5DOWN
NOLA


Stoner and Sludge Metal might be overlapping terms, but at least I can see the sense in separating the two ends of the spectrum. "Southern Metal", however? Get real. We don't need three names for "metal that leans on the blue note"
6Xasthur
To Violate the Oblivious


"Depressive black metal is a sub-genre of Black Metal which features an overall monotonous sound, repetitive and frequently droning guitars, apathetic drums, occasional minimalistic keyboards and atmospheric ambient passages." Really? Just sounds like someone didn't put effort into their regular black metal to me.
7Sybreed
Slave Design


"Cyber Metal": is just industrial metal for posers.
8Cock and Ball Torture
Egoleech


Pornogrind doesn't exist. It's just fucking goregrind.
9Neurosis
Through Silver In Blood


"Atmospheric sludge metal" is a really good way to say "I know post-metal exists, but I need a more wedgiable way to refer to it"
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