|Papa's Worst of 2018|
I'm right on time as always and I naively don't expect to suddenly hear anything worthy of entering the list at this point.
late entries to be entered here:
emotional likeness: the best of the overrated messes
emotional likeness: the draft demo compilation of the year
Heir to Despair
emotional likeness: *sigh* *cough*
emotional likeness: the kings of the boring part of your hipster emo friend's favourite "aah how can you not know this band?"
emotional likeness: another one of those dark-synth, drown-voiced, dull-song-writing butchers of the good (or moderately acceptable) name of darkwave
|75||The Amity Affliction|
emotional likeness: your producer has a bipolar disorder, probably, cause the music cannot decide, whether it's a mediocre pop bore or a mediocre metalcore bore.
Titles With The Word Fountain
emotional likeness: it's always cool to have bands release their demos… until you realise that it is a finished product
emotional likeness: being caught in the crossfire of mormons and catholics, both of which want to fight each other to death over the right to ask you about Jesus.
|72||Black Moth Super Rainbow|
emotional likeness: the fall from grace
emotional likeness: combining tedious song-writing with some off-putting instrumentation and passing it off as innovation or something. (shame that this is the last thing we'll hear from Scott Hutchison)
|70||Manic Street Preachers|
Resistance Is Futile
emotional likeness: I imagine a few folk here absolutely delighted in hating this album (Doof?)
emotional likeness: the flatness in the production really hurt my ears
|68||Forage and Wander|
Time Well Spent
emotional likeness: extensive whining
emotional likeness: nothing much to see here, just forgettable
emotional likeness: water
emotional likeness: all artsy flare and no substance makes Johnny a dull album
emotional likeness: the non-mainstream mainstream pop
|63||Between the Buried and Me|
emotional likeness: it's good to have a maths degree, you can do music with it, apparently.
|62||Car Seat Headrest|
Twin Fantasy (Face to Face)
emotional likeness: a hipster loves recycling so much, he does it to his music even
|61||Unknown Mortal Orchestra|
Sex and Food
emotional likeness: bore and snore
emotional likeness: cancer is a bitch, losing a loved one is a bitch, being able to play music is apparently also a bitch
emotional likeness: oh look, it's the heaviness that barely goes anywhere other than heaviness. (but at least the heaviness is nice)
emotional likeness: Russian emo darkwave phase
emotional likeness: do you have to be stoned beforehand?
The House Primordial
emotional likeness: earache
|55||Alice in Chains|
emotional likeness: the band that died with their original frontman is now deader than ever.
emotional likeness: overlong overbearing overboredom
emotional likeness: a notch above their usual level of dullness and uninspired messiness, so maybe next time we'll get a half-decent album
Life In Exile
emotional likeness: *explodes in the epicness* *reassembles, beacuse he immediately forgot what he just heard*
White Is Relic/Irrealis Mood
emotional likeness: what does 'obnoxious music' stand for? … oh, alright
|50||Slaughterhouse (CA, USA)|
emotional likeness: one of those outputs that are so lo-fi that it makes you wonder, had it had a listenable production, would it have actually been good…
Oil of Every Pearl's Un-Insides
emotional likeness: oh I get it now. and I only needed to cut off my dick and wear celophane as a dress, pretending it better exemplifies my "personality"
emotional likeness: some forgettable overrated bore 2018
Kindness Is The New Rock And Roll
emotional likeness: an album that is the opposite of kindness, because it annoys you so much, preaches about rock and roll, which it has nothing to do with.
emotional likeness: man, computer generated metal has really come a long way.
|45||Yo La Tengo|
There’s A Riot Going On
emotional likeness: still trying to ride off of that brief 1990s indie pre-britpop craze
Let's Go Sunshine
emotional likeness: still trying to ride off of that brief 2000s indie post-britpop craze
So Sad So Sexy
emotional likeness: nah, just sad
emotional likeness: those people that tell you how much they love sex, but when it comes to it, they just lay there like "do the sex with me, human person"
emotional likeness: who actually thinks this guy has any musical talent?
|40||Sun Kil Moon|
This Is My Dinner
emotional likeness: oh, there are many people actually think this guy has a talent? okay…
emotional likeness: that thing your dad thinks is old
|38||Echo and The Bunnymen|
The Stars, The Oceans and The Moon
emotional likeness: at least they were really good live
emotional likeness: yew
Boarding House Reach
emotional likeness: Webster Dictionary defines 'bloated' as this fucking thing.
emotional likeness: it's moldy cheese, but not the good edible mold
emotional likeness: very in-the-moment, musically and thematically… said no one ever.
emotional likeness: does anyone have any idea as to when and how and why they ever got big?
emotional likeness: 3 Doors Down called. They're not mad you sound just like them, they just complained that nobody cares about them either.
Easy Listening (Not)
emotional likeness: well, they did say it was not an easy listening
|30||Math and Physics Club|
Lived Here Before
emotional likeness: I can't really explain what made me dislike this album so much, but every time I try to put it back on, I just immediately fall asleep, so here's to the ultimate dull folk-pop album of the year.
The American Dream
emotional likeness: a fall from grace so hard that it makes you question, whether there's been any grace to begin with
emotional likeness: when you apply emo song-writing on a pop-rock album devoid of any rock whatsoever
emotional likeness: Car Seat Headrest, 20 years later
Ahead of Two Thoughts
emotional likeness: weird for the sake of being weird
|25||A Perfect Circle|
Eat the Elephant
emotional likeness: a disgraceful return for a far from graceful band
|24||Three Days Grace|
emotional likeness: copy and paste what I said about Mayday Parade, but with the exception that someone actually still listens to this band… somehow. It's also universally disliked.
emotional likeness: the very process of becoming a eunuch
Invasion Of Privacy
emotional likeness: I first heard of her, when I some publication (the Pitchforks of the world) said that she was the biggest thing that year and it was impossible to not have heard of her… yeah.
A Productive Cough
emotional likeness: a cough is a cough, no matter how productive
emotional likeness: this is like watching a mediocre blockbuster movie that is destined to bomb at the box office suddenly trying to convince you it has an important message to spread.
Let Them Be Alien
emotional likeness: turns out if you have low voice, sexually ambiguous preferences and half-decent synthesiser skill, you can pretend to be a darkwave post-punk act nowadays
emotional likeness: first pubes growing: the album
emotional likeness: NPC#44557-C: "Orange man bad"
|16||Stone Temple Pilots|
Stone Temple Pilots (2018)
emotional likeness: just a healthy reminder that this band has never been good.
Coup de Grace
emotional likeness: there's no real snarky comment here, it's just outrageously boring and tasteless
My Dear Melancholy,
emotional likeness: obnoxious prick
|13||Panic! at the Disco|
Pray For The Wicked
emotional likeness: obnoxious prick(s)
emotional likeness: just realised this thing came out this year. Man, completely forgot this band exists even.
I Was Starting to Wonder
emotional likeness: the exemplification of 'washed out pop'
|10||Thirty Seconds to Mars|
emotional likeness: oh hey, I suddenly believe the people who say that America is a dumpsterfire
Home Alone on Halloween
emotional likeness: proof that The Monitor was the worst thing that ever happened to this band. It did to them what Nirvana did to alternative rock: became a symbol of greatness and literally murdered everything else to follow it.
When Legends Rise
emotional likeness: the early 00s called, they want their laughing stock back
|7||Against The Current|
emotional likeness: along the current, but, y'know, right in the middle, where you're drowned out by all the other stuff you copied
|6||Fall Out Boy|
M A N I A
emotional likeness: humpty bloaty had a great fall out boy
emotional likeness: evolution is bullshit, it's all artificial design, but as it appears from this album… it's all devil.
|4||Gang of Four|
emotional likeness: "we could have released like three classic LPs and an EP to top it off and leave as legends, but we decided to stick around for fucking ever" - the band
Am I a Girl?
emotional likeness: computer-generated focus-grouped nonsense
emotional likeness: first pubes removal: the album
|1||Kero Kero Bonito|
emotional likeness: Bar Sachiko (and I refuse to listen to that full-length of theirs)