Frail Body Artificial Bouquet
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Hawks
March 31st 2024


88636 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

Neat observation.

JayEnder
March 31st 2024


20027 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

Lol. Honestly this feels more blackgaze than anything.

FowlKrietzsche
March 31st 2024


887 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

Blackened skramz

GreyShadow
March 31st 2024


7074 Comments


checked Refrain and oh boyyyyyyyyyyyyy gonna hopefully get to all of this tonight

JayEnder
March 31st 2024


20027 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

Monolith into Refrain is this album's peak but it all rules

Uzumaki
March 31st 2024


4517 Comments


Love blackened skramz

Hawks
March 31st 2024


88636 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

Very blackgazey yeah.

botb
March 31st 2024


17922 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

Don’t get any black metal or for that matter shoegaze in this at all but it’s sick

MillionDead
March 31st 2024


5342 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

Looks like I'm gonna love this

botb
March 31st 2024


17922 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

Vocals aren’t my favorite but man they’re miles better than some other skramz bands

gregorgojira
March 31st 2024


18 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

Thanks for all the positive feedback, this is only my second review I've properly written and in all honestly I kinda rushed this one, only because I was genuinely floored by this record. Any criticism is welcome

Wildcardbitchesss
March 31st 2024


12224 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

It’s really good man!

GreyShadow
March 31st 2024


7074 Comments


on Critique Programme now and oh boyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

GreyShadow
March 31st 2024


7074 Comments


outro riff of Devotion was a real fucking moment

Monolith into Refrain is what earthquakes are made of

GreyShadow
March 31st 2024


7074 Comments


closer let me down (i hate the 6/8 feel for music like this) but until then, holy fuck
beautiful album

FowlKrietzsche
March 31st 2024


887 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

"Any criticism is welcome"



I'll give er' a shot.



para. 1



"whether it be through means that don't justify an end, or vice versa"

What does this mean? Sounds cool and deep ig but I'm having trouble actually deciphering what you're saying. Is this about the pandemic?



"it brought a lot of promise and intrigue with it."

'with it' is redundant and should be deleted.



Try to avoid starting sentences with conjunctions. "But, with all this momentum..." is a rather jarring way to demonstrate contrast, I would go with "However, with all this momentum..." instead, or rewrite the sentence altogether.



"The killer of anything and everything social related..."

This bit until the end of para. 1 reads clunky, I kept expecting the language to resound a little more ig. Delete 'related'. Start "This killed bands like..." with "The killer of bands like...", I know you started the prior sentence the same but it makes the language ring nicely and the repetition hammers home the point. Plus 'This killed' doesn't have any different of a meaning and if you care about reusing 'killer' then 'killed' is just egregious imo.



"And seemingly, Frail Body seemed to be one of those bands."

'seemed to be one of those bands' is all redundant and can be deleted.



para. 2



"4 years since the beginning of the pandemic and the release of their debut record and some semi-activity later; we've been brought to Artificial Bouquet."

No. Use commas and rewrite.



The rest of para. 2 is very good and evocative. Only comment is "into pure, unbridled purgatory" does not invoke images of something this ferocious (I will forever describe Mirror Reaper this way, however). There are some redundant words and questionable punctuation as well, but nothing so egregious I feel like staying up overly late to correct.

FowlKrietzsche
March 31st 2024


887 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

para. 3



"Of course these elements deviate as these longer, and even shorter tracks move on which is easily this records biggest strength, the sense of progression and pacing is adventurous and nautical through and throughout."

Shore up your punctuation up, pardner!

'Of course, these elements deviate as the longer, and even shorter, tracks move along what is easily this record's (interjection: its okay to repeat an album title throughout the review, this is a good moment to do so) biggest strength, the sense of progression and pacing, which is adventurous and nautical(huh??? close the thesaurus) throughout.'



Otherwise, here's a cheat from a fool who knows very little about actually making music, use the word 'dynamics' more. Basically its how loud-to-soft is scaled in music, a dynamic song has a large contrast between its loud and quiet moments, while a song that is not very dynamic would be all loud or all quiet. Contrasting the dynamic differences between the long and short tracks is a great way to talk about this album and how it differentiates itself from the pack ;)



Rest of para. 3 is fiiiiiine but would still recommend a cursory rereading, there are a couple of missing commas and some words make the sentences a little confusing.



para. 4



"The icing atop the painfully poetic cake are Lowell's vocals."

lol, I like this line a lot. Just use 'is' instead of 'are'!



"the guitar tone is every bit grindy as it sounds like a forest fire happening in real time"

Not sure about this metaphor, but maybe restructure the sentence first.

FowlKrietzsche
March 31st 2024


887 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

para. 5

"Artificial Bouquet establishes Frail Body as the triumphant leaders in the new age of screamo, and have made a true masterclass in the heavy music space."

'Artificial Bouquet' is the subject of this sentence, which means you are indicating that it is Artificial Bouquet who made a true masterclass, and not Frail Body.



"I truly do believe this band has untapped talent, when they’ve visited hell and back, the only way to go is up."

Alright, this is my last thing, but its a little more structural. You try and interlace a theme of ascension throughout this review, and I really think some more time in the oven could have brought it out more. Instead of acting as a tight, thin wire to structure your analysis around (much like the album does with grief, except instead of exposition its riffz), it behaves much more like a frog in a stream, living underwater and only occasionally becoming visible to surface for air. It really does go back to the ambiguity of your opening sentence I think; a clearer beginning where maybe you more clearly express the frustration of seeing all your ambitions halted by a whim of nature could help you build a stronger thread throughout this review that you pull tight with a forceful closing sentence.



As it stands, this is a pretty great first draft. Reread it aloud to yourself when you get the chance, that will really help you pick out which sentences might read clunky to a different set of eyes. Otherwise, I'm hyped af about this album too so I cannot blame you for the hype typos (hypos??)

neekafat
Staff Reviewer
March 31st 2024


26238 Comments

Album Rating: 3.9

what do the vox sound like

Slex
March 31st 2024


16623 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

Y'all need to stop being cowards and bump this to a 5



Idk if you'd dig this tbh Neek



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