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Fun fact: The only thing that has truly understood my pain when no one or nothing else else did was metal. It's like a friend I could always turn to when everything else was pure shit.



Also yea this album riffs hard trilo

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My 20s sucked honestly. Got married to the wrong person, became miserable for years. Got divorced around 31, started living life smarter, 30s have been p cool ngl.

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But yeah riffs heal all wounds [3]

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Only on Sput Will one find psychological counseling/real talk tucked away behind a DM album comment thread.





Sometimes I really do love this site.

we the goat

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❤❤❤



It's all good cap. I have not remarried. Most likely not looking to at any point. I have had 2 serious relationships since then, both more fulfilling than my marriage was. Not with anyone at the moment but there are some prospects I might pursue after the beginning of 2022. Dating just sucks so much lol. I would ultimately like to find myself in a quality life-long relationship, but I personally think the institution of marriage is a sham and do not wish to participate in it again. But if I find the right woman I and she wants to, I might, idk.



And yeah I have 3 kids. 17, 12 and 8

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I've just been focusing on myself and my kids and my good friendships over the last couple of years and honestly it's been quality shit

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You became a parent when you were 20? That's pretty cool and mature man. I've never even been in a committed relationship lol. I feel soooooo behind it's insane. Depression, anxiety, stress, ptsd and addiction is not a good combination.

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I mean, it was unplanned lol. But she's a real good and smart kid, love her lots.



Everyone's life is different tho man. Marriage and kids do not have to be the be-all, end-all of life pursuits. You can live a perfectly successful and fulfilling life without them.



And yeah, those things are all really tough and just compound the severity when piled on top of each other. I dont know if you've tried seeing a therapist or psychiatrist, but I personally swear by both. I was in a super dark place immediately after my marriage ended and my psychiatrist literally saved my life, like I wouldn't be here now if it wasn't for him. I think psychiatry gets a really bad rap. You can find someone who can really help you, I believe that.



Don't give up man. If I can overcome and come back from the severe depths of my depression and anxiety, I honestly believe that it's possible for anyone, it just takes time.

Album Rating: 3.5

That's awesome cap, good for you guys! Kids can be shitheads but once they become a part of your life, u can never live without em again, adore my children yeah



Actually my son is starting to get into dm and thrash, he's 12. I second-handed him some of my old band shirts that I found in a pile, gorguts, incantation, immolation etc. He loves em. We have an hour commute when I pick them up from their mom so in the car we swap random facts and stories about metal and people in metal and explore music, I've played demilich and gorguts for him and he digs em a lot so proud dad moment there

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Oh yeah I definitely agree. Although the crippling loneliness have been very damaging from isolating myself for years, I think I'd prefer having this experience over being in abusive/toxic relationships that might have caused even more damage. I mean I have been hanging out with extremely toxic people still but idk if having girlfriends that didn't feel meaningful would be better.



The problem is that I really haven't done anything meaningful in my 20s at all. It has pretty much just been isolation, addiction, and loneliness. I have barely even had any friends. To miss out on so much during your youth just hurts.



Sadly my experience with psychiatry has been horrible. I live in Sweden and the mental health care system here is a joke. They haven't taken me seriously at all and I've pretty much just been put on waiting list after waiting list and has been thrown around from ward to ward. Worst experience was after my suicide attempt where I apparently wasn't considered an "emergency case" and got sent to another waiting list. But my friend who almost overdosed on every fucking drug there is immediately got to see a therapist lmao because HE was an emergency case that didn't even scream for help. What a fucking joke.



But I have started to see a private therapist and she has been great so far. Unfortunately it's insanely expensive and I can't afford to go there as much as I want to.

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@ cap, thats good man. Their mom and I definitely try to make everything as easy for them as possible in that regard cuz I'm sure it can be hard. We remain good friends and are pretty much always on the same page, I just think it wasn't a good idea to get married and the divorce was completely mutual.



We split when my daughter [8] was a baby so she has never known us to be together. When she first learned that mommy and daddy used to be married she was kinda confused and thought it was funny lol

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@kusangii, sorry man that sounds rough.



Im glad you are at least able to see someone who is helpful now.



But I do feel like completely trying to avoid toxic friendships/relationships is important. You don't want to get hurt and taken advantage of

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Yep. I've hard to learn that the hard way. It's rough because it means I have to stray away from some family members too. But my brother really has done quite the damage to me. The worst part is that he isn't even aware of it.



But hearing other stories about how they've overcome it actually helps a little. I really like it.

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Sorry to hear that kusangii.



I am not a therapist or anything but if you ever need to chat or vent lemme know or just s/b me. We fuck around a lot here but I genuinely want everyone to be ok.

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Appreciate it man. Metal really brings us together, it's beautiful

riffs are the great unifier

fukken m/

What a beautiful page. ford is the kinda dad I wanna be someday haha.

Kusa, you and I seem to live parallel lives. I hope you know you're not alone and you shouldn't feel like you've failed. Life isn't a race and we all figure our own paths out at a different pace. I know how you feel though... so far behind everyone else. I've never been in a serious relationship either besides this one girl, but she was super toxic and insecure about herself. She relied on me to make her happy and I had enough of my own insecurities to deal with.

Dating sucks for pretty much everybody these days, so don't be too concerned about that. The universe does work out sometimes, and you will cross paths with the right girl when the time is right. Just do what you love to do, involve yourself with music, meditation, nature, whatever it may be. We spend our entire lives trying to achieve something beyond ourselves that will impress others... which isn't the way to live. To hell with what other people think!

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Metal is love, metal is life



A really, really good metal show is probably my favorite thing to experience in life



Edit: I hear ya Jay. Maybe we do haha. You're still young tho, and so am I when you really think about it. If there is any advice I can give it's to be as kind to yourself as possible. Practice self-love etc. I've always been my worst enemy and it has been the most damaging thing. I really know what I want to do but it's that disgusting voice in my head I have to practice to just shut up and let me be alone.

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Hell yeah and it's awesome to hear about u and ur family cap. Relationships are work yeah but with the right person it works. Super happy for u that u two are making it and having such great bonding and relationship with ur son!! :D