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All reviews on this site are subjective. Ill throw anyone who claims otherwise down a deep, black pit. As for your review - its just bad writing. It reads like a rant, not any sort of self-contained piece of writing. You're 'style' overshadows the entire point of the review, and makes it sound uninformed, amateurish and it's just irritating to read. You go ahead and be blunt, but ill just tell you that in your case, it doesn't make for anything resembling a good review. If your intro shows anything it's that you can write well, but you're wasting your talent on attention seeking reviews.
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@ Mr Bole
How dare you  This Message Edited On 07.24.07
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hyperboleking, i like you more and more everytime i read one of your reviews, i may disagree with you on sabbath, but still, Van Halen really suck and tshi review is highly accurate as far as i'm concerned
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Hyperboleking strikes again!
I'm not much of a fan of track by tracks, but this one was ok. I'm not a Van Halen fan either.This Message Edited On 07.24.07
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Do you guys notice that almost every review he he does is like the same thing?
I dont like this album much. It has some interesting guitar lines, but its pretty cheesy. And don't do track by tracks, they don't do a good job a explaining everything and look messy. Generalizations make an easier read.This Message Edited On 07.24.07
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So...what music do you like? Most people wouldn't come onto this site and trash what are widely regarded as great/and or influential albums like you did.
I'm not saying theres really anything wrong with that (I wasn't a big fan of this review, I just saw your ratings for the others), its just a bit odd thats all. I'd be interested for you to review an album that you actually really like.
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3. You Really Got Me
Overall, the best song on the album. Of course, it was written by the Kinks. The riff is incredibly catchy. Again, it was written by the Kinks, not these buffoons. David Lee Roth’s voice is a poor substitution, indeed, and the solo is unsurprisingly, crap, as it doesn’t fit the song one bit. 1/5
Dude, that is not detailed. All I know about the song is that the riff is catchy, Roth's voice isn't good and the solo doesn't fit. If I were you, I would go read some reviews written by staff reviewers so that you can get a better grasp on just what a detailed review is.This Message Edited On 07.24.07
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[quote=hyperboleking]I'm neither of those. I am a truth-telling, anti-musical elitist.[/quote]
You may call me... V.
This Message Edited On 07.24.07
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I'm neither of those. I am a truth-telling, anti-musical elitist. it is also a hoax that all my reviews are negative, see my hendrix review.
Ugh, here's another problem. You don't speak the truth, you speak your opinions. Stop acting like everything you say has to be right and anyone who begs to differ must be retarded. You're no better than anyone else here.
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What are you talking about? He's feeding us the truth and freeing us from our corporate chains!
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What are you talking about? He's feeding us the truth and freeing us from our corporate chains!
lol
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Please stop.
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Ooooo, ahhhhh. How impressive, indeed! Two handed tapping "how difficult! And what an original idea"not like Jimmy Page had already done this in the solo in “Heartbreaker.” And even if he did, he didn’t have a ton of effects pedals to make it sound faster and more technical than it really was like this god did! All hail Eddie! This is an entirely instrumental track which consists of Eddie making some extremely irritating and unmelodic noises with his guitar. It brings to mind the first time you got an electric guitar, and you didn’t know how to play, so you messed around with it and made some crappy sounds and said “Screw learning, I’ll just make this my trademark style!” It also represents the point in which a large part of heavy metal became trying to craft as outrageously annoying a guitar solo as humanly possible, regardless of if the solo even makes sense musically or fits the song.
Actually, it was Steve Hackett from your favorite band, Genesis, along with some jazz guitarists, that originated the tapping thing, but none of them did it like Eddie did. And you also proved you have literally no f*cking clue what you're talking about because this song is quite playable without any special effects or added loops/guitar tracks. I think you pretty much said all of that in a desperate attempt to add weight to your highly-opinionated arguments on EVH's skills (which are without question to anyone who actually PLAYS GUITAR). And he pulls it all off live really well I might add, so maybe you should go watch a Youtube video or two, killer. Do your homework before you start spouting off blatant falsehoods, or better yet, learn how to write better than your average pissed-off 8th grade English student.
And not for nothing, but EVH went way beyond just shredding. His tone was immaculate considering his pathetically-simple setup/rig, and his rhythm playing was second to none in rock guitar. Yeah, a whole lot of hair-metal bands ripped him off and bastardized the Van Halen sound in the 80's, but it's not like they planned it or anything... you can't help it when people nick your sh*t.
With all that said, this album is mediocre, just like your review.This Message Edited On 07.24.07
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This is a good album!
What you mean terrible guitar playing? Eddie Van Halen Invented his own fresh unique sound A.K.A the "Brownsound".
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I'm guessing reviews for OK Computer, Grace, Frances the Mute, and Lateralus are all in the works.
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Don't give him ideas.
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this review is seriously bullshit, not because i love this album and i disagree, but its just attention grabbing. you said that EVH used a lot of fx on eruption which is not true, he used only phaser, and tape echo on the very last note. no fx were used that speeded up the song or clouded his technique, so get your information correct.
you also clearly do not understand the ratings, because a .5 is reserved for the worst albums possible. it should be just as uncommon as a 5, which is a rating you'll never use because youre too busy trying to get some attention.This Message Edited On 07.24.07
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I really don't care for this album, first and foremost because the lyrics are piss poor. Of course, lyrics probably weren't Van Halen's main priority, but it's just distracting.
This review is terrible. I understand that using hyperbole is "your thing," but it just comes off as juvenile and forced. It's not that the rest of us haven't "caught onto" it yet; it's just not clever or funny in the least.
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Guys you're all obviously confused. After all we live in Plato's allegory of the cave, (the matrix essentially for those who havn't read it) not real life. Hyperbole has to come save us from our evil captors who force us to believe in a false reality, duh. /sarcasm
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Hyperboleking's gonna rock the vote.
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