Album Rating: 3.5

That’s been a streaming platform gimmick for a while that tons of bands do and yes it is insanely obnoxious

Album Rating: 2.5

The Act was a cool, unique, hit or miss experiment that I have come to enjoy over time. Unfortunately with the radio/streaming/relative commercial success of Chemical, the band has since doubled down on making more butt rock anthems and I just don’t care to listen anymore.

Album Rating: 3.5

It’s a bit of a weird trajectory for them to me for sure. But if we could get a zombie-esque EP release every 7-10 years that works for me too lol

Album Rating: 3.0

How are these new singles so damn sterile and soulless dear lord

insane how dull Depoyster's vocals sound, cant believe I was missing Mike's barks

Album Rating: 3.0

Jeremy is so profoundly uninteresting on all of these songs, idk how he gets away with writing the same verse/chorus every single time



Come to think of it the whole band just sounds about as autopilot as humanely possible. Absolute chore sitting through this shit, and of course the album has 14 songs lmao

Album Rating: 3.0

Just write ZIII at this point bc that's their songwriting at its most interesting



Who is this new stuff even for

Album Rating: 2.0

Yeah dude it's beyond me how their new work gets so highly praised because I'm not hearing it at all. Felt like I watched them play the same song 15 times in a row when I saw them live last year but Mike and Jeremy are the only original members left so maybe I just don't like this band without the magic of the other dudes.

Album Rating: 3.0 | Sound Off

"Just write ZIII at this point bc that's their songwriting at its most interesting"

[2] been saying this since ZII

Lmao they have literally released half of the new album as single? 7 songs and the album isn’t out for 3 more weeks? What a miserable joke this band has become

Album Rating: 3.5

I’m astonished at how bad most of the singles are. The Act and Color Decay were a step in the wrong direction, but they sound like masterpieces compared to what this new album is shaping up to be

Album Rating: 3.0

So who's excited for the new album?



*crickets chirp in the distance*

Album Rating: 3.0

Still longing for Mike's lows from ZI. Absolute peak.

Album Rating: 1.0

"So who's excited for the new album?"



I haven't rated anything a 1.0 in a while.



Also nik nokturnal just dropped a new song today while we're talking about garbage



https://youtu.be/3KkiTmMajpc?si=UEzufNJ3xCIClCs7

Album Rating: 3.0

Holy fuck that was awful. Video looks like something a 13 year old thinks a “hardcore” music video would look like

Call me deaf but I think the song is pretty good
BUT
my eyes are bleeding. Did you know there's a term for it? Haemolacria. Don't worry, I'm no walking encyclopaedia, I've just read about it. Knew it had to be a chimaera of hem and lacrima, but couldn't quite put my finger on it without checking. It is a very cool word, definitely deserves more usage. Not unlike haematemesis, which doesn't look nor sound exactly as cool but refers to an equally nice phenomenon. Because vomiting blood IS nice, don't you think?

Album Rating: 1.0

I envied the deaf for that whole 3:33

Album Rating: 4.0

as enjoyable as this was to a degree, flowers is an abomination. they could simplay move on as JDP one man project by now. mike should start something new

Album Rating: 3.5

I like quite some stuff here, curious about the new one.

Album Rating: 2.0

The Lambgoat review for the new album said it about as good as I think anyone can.



"Besides “All Out,” Flowers isn’t much of a metal record at all. This is nothing new to late-career The Devil Wears Prada, but entirely gone is any of the experimentation they've toyed with in the past. Lighter albums of theirs such as The Act and Transit Blues at least incorporated creative guitar parts, chilling atmospheric elements, and Mike Hranica’s pained vocal delivery, but that’s entirely missing now. After it was revealed that guitarist Kyle Sipress was largely left out of the writing process, it became clear that the band’s goals have shifted. They’ve marketed Flowers as “their most significant creative leap forward yet,” and that “their union as bandmates—but more importantly as friends—is stronger than ever,” but musically it feels like the complete opposite. Almost every song has a different co-writer, ranging from Fit For a King and A Day To Remember’s Bobby Lynge, Moodring’s Austin Coupe, and a who’s who of LA producers responsible for hits from I Prevail, Falling Reverse, Linkin Park, and Papa Roach. That’s right where The Devil Wears Prada want to be, shining among the dull, phone-it-in stars of the top algorithmic playlists and arena tours.



Lyrically, they’re content with one fish two fish, red fish blue fish rhyme schemes and generic allusions to struggling with depression and finding happiness. It’s a Mad Libs of bad radio metal pastiche. Find poorly constructed wordplay about being kept in the dark, crushed under weight, stuck between heaven and hell, severing the ties, and swallowing bitter pills. The whole thing is soulless. I know their late 2010s material isn’t the most well-liked, but it’s astounding that a band can go from the poetic “To the Key of Evergreen” and “Line of your Hands” to the hackneyed “So Low,” which features the chorus lines: “Tell me why the highs always feel so low/I only feel alive when I lose control/We built this fire, now it's up in smoke…” Utterly meaningless, metaphorically barren, and so vague it could apply to anything.



Bottom Line: A new low for The Devil Wears Prada, their ninth LP Flowers is the band at their most unrecognizable. Low-effort, outsourced songwriting and bland production drag on for far too long, sucking all life from the already formulaic modern metal structure. Despite the nonstop onslaught of underwhelming mainstream releases this year, they’ve managed to stand out from the pack in terms of sheer emptiness. Not experimental enough for their late 2010s fans, not heavy or charming enough for their nostalgic early fans, which leaves me wondering: who is this for?"