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The Office: Characters Ranked

For the US version only. I don't care if you watched the UK version you fucking hipster trash. Ricky Gervais sucks.
Aphotic Womb

Michael - Michael is the fucking worst. Fuck Michael. His horrible interactions with women, his complete lack of morals, his lack of self control, his lack of judgment his malaise of awkwardness. Michael just totally fucking sucks. I really hate him. He can be okay sometimes. But 99 percent of the time he's shit, Total shit. Fuck Michael.

Andy - The Nard Dog. Oh man. Andy's 'attempts' to woo Erin made me cringe so hard that my face is now partially paralyzed. His occasional bursts of impotent rage are awful. Andy is rarely even remotely likable. His entire relationship arc with Angela was soul-crushingly bad. God damn fuck Andy.
16Vehementer Nos
Vehementer Nos

Gabe - Gabe is a spineless fucking bitch. His attempts to assert his dominance over the office are even more cringeworthy and awful than Michael's. He has no personality. Just a bootlicking, yuppie hipster. Fuck you Gabe.
15Sun Worship
Elder Giants

Toby - Toby is one of those awful people who considers himself to be a victim of circumstance but he's actually just a pathetic piece of shit. He is completely undeserving of the constant abuse he receives but he still kinda totally sucks.
14Terra Tenebrosa
The Purging

Kelly - Kelly reminds me of a lot of lame superficial bitches I know. I mean obviously that's the whole point but she annoys me.
In The Forest Of The Dreaming Dead

Phyllis - I actually intended for Phyllis to be much higher in the list but I fucked up and I forgot to include her. Phyllis is so nice and sincere. She may play an extremely minor role but she nails it consistently. Sorry Phyllis, you should totally be like 8 instead of Jim.
12Today Is the Day

Creed - Creed could have been such a great character. Alas, he is far too underutilized to make an impact.
Cut your flesh and Worship Satan

Meredith - Meredith is too one-dimensional and slutty to really make an impact on the show. Unlike most of the other characters she doesn't seem to be much more than a one-trick pony.

Kevin - Kevin is occasionally amusing but often his over sexually charged personality is too creepy for comfort. He isn;t all bad though. And his Halloween costume as Michael Moore is ON POINT.
9Blood Freak

Oscar - Oscar is the ultimate middle of the road character. He is neither particularly likable or unlikable.
The Ending Quest

Jim - I think Jim was initially intended to be the show's voice of reason; the character that the audience would mostly instantly identify with. But I can't feel that Jim's character is slowly sabotaged by his increasingly arrogant attitude towards Dwight and his other coworkers. Also his deep-seated insecurity that occasionally bubbles to the surface is unbecoming.
Charnel Passages

Angela - Angela's crazy cat lady/faux-religious personality is entirely offset by her outrageous hotness. Am I crazy? Seriously she is fucking hot, The more I watch the show the more it drives me crazy. I just love tiny girls.

Dwight - Dwight is simply hysterical and over-the-top. He may be a complete sociopath but his outlandish antics are one of the show's most consistent bright spots.
Wolf Will Swallow The Sun

Ryan - Ryan is obviously a terrible character but his strength lies in his inconsistency. Ryan was basically designed by BJ Novak to be a revolving door cast of despicable hipster stereotypes. Ryan is so fucking disgustingly awful that he goes all the way back to being awesome.
4Full of Hell and Merzbow
Full of Hell and Merzbow

Erin - Erin's incredible stupidity and indefatigable optimism is instantly endearing. She is simply too adorable to dislike. Her only flaw is her terrible taste in men. She's such a goofball.
3Intestine Baalism
Ultimate Instinct

Stanley - Stanley is practically the show's only consistent character. His total self absorption and disinterest is a breath of fresh in the Office's ever-changing landscape. His almost total lack of facial impressions is CLUTCH.
2Inter Arma
Paradise Gallows

Pam - Pam is always sweet and lovable and tries to seek out the best qualities in even the most challenging of her coworkers.Though she isn't perfect, she tries her best. I mean god damn, she's even nice to Dwight and Kevin.
1Fides Inversa
Hanc Aciem Sola Retundit Virtus

Darryl - An absolutely perfect character and a masterclass performance from Craig Robinson. Darryl is soft spoken, intelligent, humorous and never overblown or caricatured. Darryl is probably the only truly lovable character on the show.
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