Asking Alexandria
Stand Up and Scream


0.5

Review

by Josh Fountain CONTRIBUTOR (60 Reviews)
October 26th, 2009 | 1258 replies | 70,901 views


Release Date: 2009 | Tracklist

Review Summary: A Cautionary Tale.

Once upon a time, there was a small boarding school. At this boarding school, there was an innocent girl, who went by the name of The Devil Wears Prada, a devout, albeit naive and simple, girl. She was a happy girl, and fairly popular, despite the fact that she was not maturing like her friend August Burns Red, who was quickly growing up without her.

She decided to go outside into the nearby forest, to frolick and such. While frolicking, she saw a shadow. She started to panic, but when BrokeNCYDE came into the light, she calmed down. BrokeNCYDE was a special boy, and was never seen without his helmet. The Devil Wears Prada said hello, and BrokeNCYDE walked over. He then grabbed her, throwing off his helmet. She then realized he was not challenged, but evil incarnate. He ripped off her clothes and forced himself upon her (think Last House on the Left.) He beat, raped, and left her for dead. Luckily, she was found and rushed to the hospital. While being treated, she found out she was pregnant. She decided to keep the baby, as we all know her beliefs on abortion. Nine months passed and the abomination known as Asking Alexandria was born.

Asking Alexandria was put up for adoption and raised in Britain. She was very stupid and prone to outbursts of senseless rage. She also had an odd obsession to dance beats. All thirteen years of her tragic life have been chronicled in the biography Stand Up and Scream. As you listen, you realize that many similar stories have been told, over and over. An angry and immature child continually acting out, all while yelling simple and annoyingly stupid phrases at (more than likely) people that don't exist.

Sometimes during her fits of rages she will delve into a Tourettes-like dance. She will scream or yell over this dance, and it seems unnatural and forced, almost as if it is involuntary. Asking Alexandria is doing the same thing, over and over, tiring everyone in earshot.

Asking Alexandria never matures, or does anything overly interesting. She bludgeons you with stupidity and immaturity for over 45 minutes, until thankfully she is murdered by a kind man named mercy.



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user ratings (1328)
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Comments:Add a Comment 
Curse.
Contributing Reviewer
October 26th 2009



7762 Comments

Album Rating: 1.0

This is going to kill my approval rating, but it was fun to write, so I don't much care.

Moral of this story: Human Resources Management is a boring class.

Digging: The Menzingers - Rented World

Athom
Staff Reviewer
October 26th 2009



17117 Comments


Concept Reviews: A Cautionary Tale

Digging: Sad Lovers and Giants - Feeding the Flame

EasternLight
October 26th 2009



2695 Comments

Album Rating: 1.5

i liked it. a lot. pos.

Iluvatar
Staff Reviewer
October 26th 2009



16072 Comments


I wish my original Angels & Airwaves review was still around. the concept review to END ALL CONCEPT REVIEWS

i didnt read it because these are silly though

Ulsufyring
October 26th 2009



1725 Comments


i liked that emmure concept review 'was pretty cool

ninjuice
October 26th 2009



6758 Comments



i liked that emmure concept review 'was pretty cool

lol

This one's good imo.

Zip
October 26th 2009



5313 Comments


Hilarious review, and way to lick your own ass Jack

Ulsufyring
October 26th 2009



1725 Comments


hey look its zip the guy that licks his own ass every time he talks because thats how far he's shoved his head up his butt

Zip
October 26th 2009



5313 Comments


If my head was up my own ass I would be licking my intestines.

Curse.
Contributing Reviewer
October 26th 2009



7762 Comments

Album Rating: 1.0

thank you, much appreciated, this was so fun to write

btw, nice Zip

Athom
Staff Reviewer
October 26th 2009



17117 Comments


HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Ulsufyring
October 26th 2009



1725 Comments


fun fact: the large intestine is mostly in the ass and also smells like crap, explaining the stench you leave whenever you post

Zip
October 26th 2009



5313 Comments


You can smell the internet now?

Curse.
Contributing Reviewer
October 26th 2009



7762 Comments

Album Rating: 1.0

get away from my review

Ulsufyring
October 26th 2009



1725 Comments


your review was nice though i would avoid namedropping in-references to sputnik's disdain for popular music


and thanks for acquiescing to my victory zip

Curse.
Contributing Reviewer
October 26th 2009



7762 Comments

Album Rating: 1.0

believe me, this type of review will not be habit-forming

Ulsufyring
October 26th 2009



1725 Comments


also, why is the band a girl?

Zip
October 26th 2009



5313 Comments


cuz it wouldn't make sense the other way

Curse.
Contributing Reviewer
October 26th 2009



7762 Comments

Album Rating: 1.0

Alexandria, and the fact that the lead vocalist's cleans make him sound like a little bitch

EasternLight
October 26th 2009



2695 Comments

Album Rating: 1.5

why the fuck do you think. the band has a vagina.



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