Snide: Diagnosed with DID

Snide 12.31.16	Having answers only leads me to have more questions at this point...
AlexKzillion 12.31.16	Wait so you have... multiple personalities?
Snide 12.31.16	I've had one of them, "Jennifer", tattooed on my left arm for over a year now.
Drifter 12.31.16	Damn that sucks
AlexKzillion 12.31.16	Wait so you got "Jennifer" tattooed on your arm and you didnt even know why?
Snide 12.31.16	Ever since I was 13, Jennifer, and multiple other personalities were always in my head, they have full back stories and everything. I got Jennifer tattooed because she was always the one who popped into my head the most during times of stress, and haunted me for nearly a decade, and I did it to force myself to let go of it, and remind myself to keep my stress levels down and under control.
Snide 12.31.16	@Drifter: It's not that it sucks, now I know what it is, I just have to find out the best way to deal with it.
50iL 12.31.16	Wow, that's really bad man. Let us know if you need any help we can give.
dreamgazing 12.31.16	i hope you are able to cope with this. i'm not close to many ppl who deal with the disorder much less am i someone who copes with it so i can't speak with any property but my sentiments are sincere, dealing with this must be confusing and emotionally taxing and i give you my best regards.
Storm In A Teacup 12.31.16	does Jennifer put out
Snide 12.31.16	@50iL: Thank you I seriously appreciate it. @dreamgazing: Thank you man, the thing that confuses me the most is why I feel so detached and why I feel like slipping out of myself whenever shit hits the fan.
Snide 12.31.16	"does Jennifer put out" No, Destiny does.
Storm In A Teacup 12.31.16	wtf is Destiny
Snide 12.31.16	"wtf is Destiny" Another one of the personalities.
AlexKzillion 12.31.16	Damn dude, a part of me always thought this disorder was kind of fake. Can't imagine how hard it is to live with that. Hope you get the treatment you need.
Snide 12.31.16	"Damn dude, a part of me always thought this was kind of fake. Can't imagine how hard it is to live with that. Hope you get the treatment you need." Honestly, I thought I had schizophrenia at times but apparently in my therapist's office "Jennifer" came out when he pushed me too far and that's how he diagnosed me.
Storm In A Teacup 12.31.16	gonna need you to make an alt for each one and all of them have to become regular users to confirm your story or don't believe you or put out. not with me, but sinternet or treb will happily volunteer
Snide 12.31.16	Storm, the idea is for me to control my emotions better so that I DON'T go into one of my personalities
hal1ax 12.31.16	DID is really rare. Stay away from psychedelic // hallucinogenic drugs, as they tend to exacerbate symptoms. how often do you make switches to your subpersonalities? and how many do you have?
TVC15 12.31.16	Do you think your music getting deleted may be associated with the DID?
Sevengill 12.31.16	dude you are a psychological dumpster fire tell us more about Jennifer Tatoo and Destiny
Snide 12.31.16	@hal: I honestly can't tell you how many times I switch because I don't remember, but I have two main ones, five other somewhat big ones, and a shitload of random ones that pop in and out. Does that include weed, because I smoke occasionally for my insomnia.
Snide 12.31.16	@TVC: I'm 100% sure that it was DID related that caused me to delete my music. @Seven: Ily Seven but honestly my head is kinda borked.
neekafat 12.31.16	Glad you know what's been causing this man, I know it only makes more questions, but diagnosing is one step closer to being better
hal1ax 12.31.16	you should stop smoking weed. so you are one-way amnesic? meaning you are aware of the existence of some subpersonalities but that cognizance is not mutual?
Snide 12.31.16	@neeka: At least these questions will hopefully be easier to answer than previous ones. @hal: I'm aware of the personalities because they start talking to me whenever I started getting incredibly stressed (different ones come out for different situations, but it's mostly the main two, Jennifer and Envy. The others like Destiny rarely come out), but once it gets to a point I just pass out, and usually just phase back in in the middle of an action (like at my therapist's office)
dreamgazing 12.31.16	i am totally on board with hal1ax; when having to cope with really any mental disorder, drugs only amplify and worsen the situation. it is best to put them off.
Snide 12.31.16	@dream: Yeah I think I'll just stop smoking weed in general, and figure out another way to cope with the occasional insomnia.
Sevengill 12.31.16	do the other yous have better tastes in music Jennifer sounds like she'd be fun to hash it out with in the Burzum thread
Snide 12.31.16	@Seven: The only one whose musical taste was a big part of his character was Envy, and he listened to almost nothing but Crust Punk, Alt Rock, and Grunge
BlacKapes 12.31.16	which personality of yours likes blood on the dance floor and other shit bands
dreamgazing 12.31.16	insomnia is probably more easily treatable than did, i'd yet again advice against drug based treatments but there's definitely more easily available ways to help sleeping disorders! worth looking into.
hal1ax 12.31.16	interesting. ya that is one-way amnesic, prob the most common pattern. ya so stop smoking weed asap, and talk to as many people as you can about issues or distress you may be facing. learning how to effectually deal with stress is paramount in DID, as switches are usually always triggered by pique moments of seemingly intolerable stress. repression is the bane of your existence so make sure you vent and air that shit out or else your pathology will only distend until you become overrun. less than 20 subs is manageable tho, try and situate frequent talk therapy. psychodynamic specialists might be good for you, but make sure u see a specialist and not some needle dick psychiatrist
Sevengill 12.31.16	@blackapes I think you're talking to him
Snide 12.31.16	@BlacKapes: You know damn well my music taste is my own lol. @dream: I'm wondering if any specific herbal tea might help with my sleep issues. @hal: Luckily I have no problem venting out my issues (both in IRL and online, as my history of being on this site will tell you). I'm going to stop smoking weed though, it sounds like it really will just emphasize how quickly I get to that level. I'm going to ask my therapist next session if he knows anyone who's a specialist in the nearby area.
TVC15 12.31.16	Yeah man really glad you got the diagnosis so that you can properly figure out the problems you're currently in. I find it interesting tho that in my AP psych textbook last year the section that talked about DID went into detail about how the disorder is primarily an American phenomenon
AlexKzillion 12.31.16	It's something in the water
dreamgazing 12.31.16	i am not sure if herbal teas alone will have a big impact on the issue but most restfulness marketed teas i buy are chamomile-based.
ScuroFantasma 12.31.16	Damn dude, sorry you're going through this. Seems like you've known about it for a while, how come you've never previously been diagnosed? "do the other yous have better tastes in music" lol' at this
hal1ax 12.31.16	tbh tho DID always stems from some severe and repressed form of stress or trauma during childhood // early adolescence, so i recommend maybe trying to dig some shit up in therapy regarding any facets of your early life that you may be reluctant to discuss. there is often a nexus group of early memories that tend to fuel and augment the condition. don't be afraid to unveil some of those skeletons
Sevengill 12.31.16	I got so used to method acting my female persona that I'd sometimes switch over without realizing it. It scared the shit out of my girlfriend at the time and led to us breaking up eventually. So I sorta feel you on this, though it's not as extreme.
Snide 12.31.16	@Everyone: Here's a picture of my tattoo of "Jennifer" - http://i.imgur.com/CimIM9E.jpg @TVC: Is it really predominately American? @Alex: Lmao @Dream: Chamomile is my favorite kind of tea so that's good news for me. @Scuro: I always thought I just had schizo or something and really was too afraid to talk about it with my therapist so I just never brought up the voices or anything. @hal: When I was 12 I had a massive bike accident that fucked up quite a bit and kept me bedridden for a month (a lot of head damage), and that also was around when my parents divorced as well.
Snide 12.31.16	@Seven: Did your persona have a name too like mine do?
TVC15 12.31.16	From what I remember from my textbook, it made it out like it is. Almost all cases of the disorder have been in the US, seldom outside. That's basically all I remember on that but considering Hal's background in psychology he'd probably have a more thoughtful/accurate answer to that
Sevengill 12.31.16	Mia. She's a condescending bitch who loves gothic clothing, charcoal eyeliner, and faux-fur jackets from GUESS. Which is a terribly inconvenient habit.
hal1ax 12.31.16	what? a bike accident? hmm... i've never heard of any physiological-oriented sort of etiology regarding DID. causation is usually like childhood sexual abuse / torture / etc. That's odd. there must be more... anyway, good luck p1mp
dreamgazing 12.31.16	or perhaps cases of it may not be recognized in other countries because they are encouraged to be repressed.
Snide 12.31.16	@hal: Thanks man, I seriously appreciate your insight throughout this thread. @TVC: That's actually really interesting and makes me wonder if I'm just a product of where I was raised @Seven: Mia sounds... interesting @dream: Europe?
dreamgazing 12.31.16	European countries are quite progressive so I doubt culturally they'd have people repressing and ignoring severe mental health issues but my theory is that in many countries, it's an issue too 'taboo' to bring to light so people dealing with it are not aware of its diagnosis and severity.
TVC15 12.31.16	I understand where dream is coming from as well; my therapist from a few years ago connected my mother dismissing my suicidal depression to how Filipino patients she had went through similar experiences when they were in the Philippines (having some kind of mental disorder and being forced to repress it or are met with hostility when a person discloses that information). But again my memory's fuzzy on more of the specifics concerning that info
Sevengill 12.31.16	idk it's weird talking about it in third-person. I've heard that DID is exceedingly rare and is related to Borderline Personality Disorder...is there crossover between the two? I fit all the symptoms for the latter but I've never been actually diagnosed so I'm not gonna WebMD myself.
hal1ax 12.31.16	i haven't done any demographic research in regards to dissociate d/o's but i know that they're relatively prevalent in Canada as well as the US. their scarcity elsewhere could easily be due to the fact that it's often misdiagnosed or written-off (prob depending on where u live) or just not reported. psychology isn't very advanced or well sought out in a lot of areas
Snide 12.31.16	@dream and tvc: I guess I lucked out being in America then where it's not as stigmatized. Fuck that sounds bad. @seven: I honestly don't know that much about it yet, I'm just starting to do a lot of my research on it and my therapist is going to tell me more when I see him next.
Snide 12.31.16	@Hal: I live in California.
hal1ax 12.31.16	i know where u live, that was addressed to the point tvc brought up
Snide 12.31.16	@hal: Oh shit my bad
dreamgazing 12.31.16	Before moving to the States I was born in Venezuela, a South American largely Catholic and moraly conservative country. I never had any knowledge, experience or mention of dissaocative personality disorders in my life there, but I am sure there are as many people who cope with the disorder as they do here in the U.S. It's all about progressivism and awareness of emotional health issues and many countries still don't grasp the complexity and importance of these things.
TVC15 12.31.16	Oh shit I forgot you moved to California Snide. Where in Cali do you live again?
Snide 12.31.16	@TVC: I've always lived in California, and I live in Huntington Beach, it's about an hour north of San Diego and an hour south of Los Angeles. @dream: I have no desire to visit any part of South America honestly, I've never heard a single good thing about it.
Sevengill 12.31.16	I hear the girls in Brazil are really hot, that's a start. and the guys too
TVC15 12.31.16	Oh. Must've confused you with another user who made a list of him moving to California lol.
Snide 12.31.16	@Seven: Lmao, hot people, bad country? @TVC: I made a list about wanting to move out of California.
dreamgazing 12.31.16	I still stand by the belief that we are culturally rich people as a whole as compared to people in westernized society lol, but yeah apart from that single thing most South American countries are not doing well at all. As for my own country, I was born in 2000 and that's relatively near to the beginning of the socialist override in government which had happened just a few years back, so I never lived to see the country in stable condition. And even now in spite of us still keeping a lively culture, I sincerely believe the U.S. is way ahead in the world at large when it comes to prioritizing mental health issues.
Sevengill 12.31.16	sweeten the pot with Rock In Rio and I'm game fuck I wish I'd been born in 2000, then I'd have had a chance to actually get a change
TVC15 12.31.16	Aaand that makes more sense now. I should probably get some sleep now
bigsoulja 12.31.16	which personality did you pretend to marry and impregnate?
Sevengill 12.31.16	yeah I'm going on about myself now, gonna turn things back over to the host sweet dreams, all.
hal1ax 12.31.16	DID is also really rare in males.. i think it's like 3 or 4 : 1 , female to male. maybe you should try to get a second diagnosis. this all just seems really atypical to me. have u been tested for a TBI (traumatic brain injury)?
Snide 12.31.16	@Seven: Lmao @dream: You're only 16? Holy shit you're well spoken @Big: Wat, lmao @hal: I don't remember taking one, so probably not. What does it entail?
dreamgazing 12.31.16	isn't it rare in males because the ratio of traumatic sexual/abusive experiences is higher with females?
hal1ax 12.31.16	if you have decent insurance, think about getting a CAT scan
hal1ax 12.31.16	"isn't it rare in males because the ratio of traumatic sexual/abusive experiences is higher with females?" that could definitely play a role, yea. tho some studies have shown that even among male//female sexually abused sample bases, rates are higher among female.
Spec 12.31.16	If you've got a disorder like that going on never touch weed again. Trust me.
Ebola 12.31.16	Best of luck, bud. Glad to hear you're seeing a therapist--that's incredibly important.
betray 12.31.16	see you and all 20 of your personalities in the fucking pit m8
Sevengill 12.31.16	tbh "Traumatic Brain Injury" sounds immeasurably less sexy than "Dissociative Identity Disorder." one is like The Joker and the other is like Special Fred.
bigsoulja 12.31.16	don't play dumb snide
Tyler. 12.31.16	fuck man weed is terrible for my anxiety i could only imagine if you have something like this tbh
dreamgazing 12.31.16	@malachite yeah i like language and i guess i try to come across as well spoken it's a habit @hal1ax that's odd. so then have females and males both as two different wholes grown up in different environments and have been taught different ways that have conditioned both to cope with trauma differently?
hal1ax 12.31.16	uhh i'm not really sure i understand your question, but ya female//males brains are just wired differently and sometimes that neurological disparity makes itself known in various pathologies. like borderline PD is predominantly a female affliction and antisocial PD is predominantly male-related. but ya u could be right about DID, maybe highly traumatic abuse is just much more ubiquitous among female children. i don't really know
bigsoulja 12.31.16	i think its a question of whether or not gender psychology is conditioned or inherent which is fairly unanswerable without the answer degenerating into some variant of "well, idk, a bit of both i guess"
dreamgazing 12.31.16	i'm much more a believer in that we separate male and female brains and nurture them differently and that's why there's so many gaps with them and that's my train of thought but i get what you're saying. ultimately there's a lot of factors that play into each specific case.
hal1ax 12.31.16	ohh ok, sorry. ya sach is right tbh--it's absolutely a combination of genetics and environment, basically always (excluding schizophrenia, which is looking more and more like an exclusively biological affliction)
bigsoulja 12.31.16	i can imagine a lot of the psychological divergence of gender is ingrained through conditioning and imposition of roles through teaching and whatnot, but i'd be shocked if the hormonal side of things wasn't predetermined
hal1ax 12.31.16	and ya it's impossible determine which plays a bigger role between the two. the answer most likely differs based on the individual
dreamgazing 12.31.16	absolutely, i just feel like the environment can have a much bigger impact on these things and that ultimately it can override the genetic influence.
dreamgazing 12.31.16	ye u right
Snide 12.31.16	Basically what I've gotten from this thread so far is; ditch weed... immediately, get a CAT scan for physical trauma, and continue to go to therapy.
dreamgazing 12.31.16	only work with a therapist who you're comfortable working with, avoid psychiatrists and subsequent physical treatment (prescribed drugs) basically
hal1ax 12.31.16	"absolutely, i just feel like the environment can have a much bigger impact on these things and that ultimately it can override the genetic influence." um, yes and no. it's reallyyyyy circumstantial. lots of variables at play--nature of the pathology, their neurochemistry, their upbringing, etc etc. i mean i grew up in like the most perfectly loving and affectionate family environment you could think of, and still ended up battling substance abuse // depression for the majority of my life, so u know i think in some cases, genetics can play a stronger role than u think. tho the person struggling in the good environment undoubtedly has a greater capacity for achieving mental stability // functionality, than does the other.
dreamgazing 12.31.16	that's good insight and it furthers the notion that every case is influnced by its own variables and that outcomes in psychology r almost always not certain.
hal1ax 12.31.16	lol na dreamgazing gave sound advice. you want to pursue ~psychologists~ and not psychiatrists. the main function of the psychiatrist is to diagnose and treat you with drug therapy, and since DID does not respond to drug therapy, all psychiatric endeavors will be a waste of time and money
brainmelter 12.31.16	lol this thread
bigsoulja 12.31.16	which personality thought it would be a good idea to get a pokemon tattoo?
zakalwe 12.31.16	Cannabis has unhinged your brain. It'll get better overtime if you knock that shite on the head.
Pon 12.31.16	^ -opens 8th Guinness of the night and rants at his kids for being fannies-
betray 12.31.16	more like diagnosed with BVB am i right
SitruK6 12.31.16	Damn dude. Hoping things will get better for ya.
Sevengill 12.31.16	more like diagnosed with BVB am i right [2] I'm not helping am i
ZippaThaRippa 12.31.16	Do any of your other personalities have better music taste?
Sevengill 12.31.16	zip you're like eight hours late to the party
Mystletainn 12.31.16	DUDE WEED
TenSecondsToThink 12.31.16	good luck keep grinding
ZippaThaRippa 12.31.16	I know it's not my fault I was asleep
SitruK6 12.31.16	Sleep iz 4 de w3ak
Snide 12.31.16	Wow this thread turned... interesting.
Sevengill 12.31.16	do your irl alts ever interact with people
onionbubs 12.31.16	damn. i dont know much about DID but best of wishes when dealing with it my dude
SitruK6 12.31.16	"do your irl alts ever interact with people" also curious about this
ArsMoriendi 12.31.16	We're calling personalities from a case of DID "real life alts" now? Sputnik never ceases to disappoint me
Sevengill 12.31.16	I'm just being a wench like I usually am to Mala. I know it's a more serious issue than that.
ArsMoriendi 12.31.16	It's 50% sure Snide is just "pranking" everyone again I'd be more sure, but that one time he freaked out about trans people because "he's occasionally a girl" makes this seem strangely true Snide, your life, whether you're telling the truth or not, must be one hell of a rollercoster
Snide 12.31.16	@Everyone: If my personalities have interacted with people, I don't remember it. Thank you everyone for your kind words. @Ars: Proof that I'm not bullshitting is the picture I took of my "Jennifer" tattoo (one of the two main personalities) that I posted earlier in the thread. Also the roller coaster never stops, my life is an enigma honestly I don't know what's going on half the time.
zaruyache 12.31.16	"I'd be more sure, but that one time he freaked out about trans people because "he's occasionally a girl" makes this seem strangely true" this is what makes me believe it's not just more trolling. That's a pretty long-term trolling attempt which imo doesn't seem very "Snide," especially with the amount of flak he got for discussing it the first time.
Sevengill 12.31.16	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_8PAzhED7nM
bigsoulja 12.31.16	maybe try smoking rock it'll calm you down
someguest 12.31.16	If you quit listening to bullshit that'd probably help.
Trebor. 12.31.16	Being on a semi-anonymous website all the time is probably not great for something like DID
Snide 12.31.16	@Mike: I've got two main ones, Jennifer and Envy. I also have five additional ones that are also major but not as common as the first two. Then there are others that pop in and out. @Zaru: If there's one thing you can believe from me that isn't trolling, believe this. I also have the Jennifer personality literally inked on my skin, and have had her inked for almost a year now.
Snide 12.31.16	"Being on a semi-anonymous website all the time is probably not great for something like DID" Honestly, probably not. I've got to learn to control that though.
ZippaThaRippa 12.31.16	Is this an elaborate marketing ploy for that movie that's about to come out?
zaruyache 12.31.16	"I also have the Jennifer personality literally inked on my skin" in all fairness tho we have no way of knowing what that tat actually represents, so outside of your having interesting taste in body art it's not really indicative of anything.
Snide 12.31.16	@Zippa: Split? Movies like that are going to terribly misrepresent people with DID imo. (Although from what I heard it's still a damn fine movie so I'll probably watch it) @Zaru: I suppose, although it should be a pretty clear giveaway when I explain it anyways. My whole goal now is to get it completely under control.
betray 12.31.16	i heard drinking v heavily helps try it out bro
bigsoulja 12.31.16	lmao
betray 12.31.16	sach can confirm
bigsoulja 12.31.16	harsh but true
Snide 12.31.16	Wat
budgie 12.31.16	"Do any of your other personalities have better music taste?" a hahahahahaaha
50iL 12.31.16	yo Hal's advice is actually pretty goat
NordicMindset 12.31.16	remember that time I revealed your "marriage" scam is that part of this too or is this a scam on its own questions, questions
someguest 12.31.16	We have every fucking liar / nutjob from the UK on this site.
Deathconscious 12.31.16	"Do any of your other personalities have better music taste?" lol, brutal.
Snide 12.31.16	No, I don't need to drink any more than I already do. I might quit drinking all together honestly.
Gyromania 12.31.16	Hit me up if you ever need to talk. I went through depersonalization disorder for years. I still live with it, I just know how to manage it now.
Lord(e)Po)))ts 12.31.16	Lmao trebor trying to give advice
Snide 12.31.16	@Gyro: I'll message you on FB
someguest 12.31.16	Never smoke a roll of packing tape, kids.
Snide 12.31.16	@Mike: That's terrible, holy shit I'm sorry you had a reaction like that. I feel as though the only way it can go from here is up, now that I know what I have I can start properly acclimating life to it so I can function better.
Deathconscious 01.01.17	"following a catastrophic reaction to some synthetic I smoked" yep, i know someone who smoked k2 and woke up the next day with depersonalization and it never went away. ive had episodes of detachment or depersonalization during moments of high stress, but it always went away. couldnt imagine living with it permanently or even long term.
hal1ax 01.01.17	wait so when you were 12 you suffered a severe bike accident which hospitalized you for a month + , then your initial dissociative symptoms began at 13? ... what was the nature of your head injury? honestly sounds like u need a CAT scan homie. sounds like frontal lobe damage
Snide 01.01.17	@Hal: The front wheel of my bike fell off and I flipped off the front, slamming my face directly into a curb. My front four teeth are fake (porcelain veneers), and I had to have a bunch of root canals. They said I had a pretty bad concussion as well. I blacked out when I landed (I also remember seeing a really bright white light the second my bike broke), I don't remember how long I was out for. I've had memory issues, and all of the symptoms started after that accident
hal1ax 01.01.17	uhh ya i really don't think u have DID. get a CAT scan, and tell ur therapist about all that shit
Deathconscious 01.01.17	how was that even overlooked in the first place.
Snide 01.01.17	My therapist knows about my accident and what resulted, but I think I'm gonna go get a CAT scan as well. If there's even a chance that the diagnosis is wrong, I want to double check. I don't want to fuck this up and prepare for something I might not even have.
someguest 01.01.17	I think I have the flu guys! But I did eat raw chicken for dinner last night too!
hal1ax 01.01.17	it just doesn't make sense. DID is like the fragmenting of your identity in order to cope with profound trauma // stress, which is why u almost always see it develop in childhood because their brains really are not equipped for dealing with those sorts of issues. i've never heard of DID stemming from an accident like yours. sounds like u just have some physiological damage that is manifesting itself in the form of memory loss//auditory hallucinations //fugue states.
bigsoulja 01.01.17	or maybe he just pulling a mad prank bro
budgie 01.01.17	" But I did eat raw chicken for dinner last night too!" m8
Snide 01.01.17	@hal: Fungue states? @big: I can literally take pictures of my porcelain veneers.
bigsoulja 01.01.17	fungus states you turn into a mushroom at given times and places
hal1ax 01.01.17	fugue state is like a period of dissociative amnesia that can last for long stretches of time , and usually results in the person "blacking out" like u mentioned. but ya idk man, doesn't sound like DID to me, unless u had something horrific happen to u in close temporal proximity to ur bike accident and are neglecting to recall it for some reason, doesn't sound like any sort of DID that i am familiar with.
hal1ax 01.01.17	haha
TheSpaceMan 01.01.17	Hal1 can you write me a script?
hal1ax 01.01.17	i would be dead if i could write scripts
anarchistfish 01.01.17	"like borderline PD is predominantly a female affliction" isn't it true that male BPD is underreported/often misdiagnosed because of the cultural perceptions around those traits?
hal1ax 01.01.17	"isn't it true that male BPD is underreported/often misdiagnosed because of the cultural perceptions around those traits?" absolutely man. i'm just going off of stats, but ya that is a legitimate point
hal1ax 01.01.17	tbh all cluster b personality disorders are like rarely ever reported. narcissists / antisocials will never just check themselves into therapy so stats on those are prob just so off-base
hal1ax 01.01.17	ya DID diagnosis is super controversial. there are some pretty strong assessment tools and techniques though that i guess allow u to be able to make some pretty strong inferences.
Snide 01.02.17	Once my work schedule pans out I'm gonna schedule a CAT scan, and until then I'm laying off any weed. If it's DID I'll quit it completely, if it isn't and it really is just bad frontal lobe / etc damage then idk
Tyler. 01.02.17	was diagnosed with a hangover today : /
Snide 01.02.17	"was diagnosed with a hangover today" I got pretty fucked up last night so I feel ya on that, I was so drunk last night that I thought a modelo beer was spicy after a few shots of tequila.
Nocturtle 01.03.17	holy fug snide you gotta be the greatest troll of all time
Snide 04.02.17	I wanted to bump this with an update; life has been going relatively well compared to how it was before. After talking to multiple therapists, doctors, etc I've been given overall a pretty hefty diagnosis of what my total condition is, and these were the ones that were brought up by all of them after observing me and my behavior, along with talking to the family and friends who were gracious enough to come in with me to sessions. DID (Dissociative Identity Disorder) ODD (Oppositional Defiant Disorder) ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder) Additional things like Insomnia, Anxiety, and other conditions were also diagnosed but said to be all caused by these root three conditions that I most likely have. It's a daily step by step process at this point.
hal1ax 04.02.17	what? ODD is a precursor to antisocial d/o // sociopathy. aren't u in your 20s? you can only diagnose a child with that--at your age it's just called antisocial disorder.
hal1ax 04.02.17	also i wouldn't take any advice from general MD's regarding mental disorders. stick to psychiatrists // psychologists
hal1ax 04.02.17	also adhd is like the single most over-diagnosed mental disorder on earth. i rly rly rly recommend not getting on any kind of amphetamine salt like adderal or vyvanse--seriously it is usually more detrimental than beneficial.
Orb 04.02.17	damn man. my head is an absolute shitstorm but I maintain my view from above generally so Im gonna go ahead and count my blessings. Sorry hear you got such a lofty battle on your hands. I see a lot western medical advice on here, which in all reality is a good thing since western medicine has a good grasp on a lot of things. One thing it fall flat on in the important of spiritual well-being in conjuction with any other sort of treatments. Don't toss spirituality to the wayside is all I can say. Look into shamanism a little is my only advice. Most shamanic cultures don't see mental illnesses like yours as a disease, but rather a symptom of mismanaged spiritual power. It might be worth your time to take a trip to visit a shaman, not for a cure, but rather a new perspective. It might something you could benefit from, what do I know, really.
Snide 04.02.17	@hal: It was an MD who told me about the ODD so I'm gonna take your advice on that and bring that up to my main therapist because now I'm confused on why they would mention that to me if that's only given as a diagnosis for children (I'm 23, 24 next week.)
Snide 04.02.17	@Evo: Damn man, thank you though. Honestly I'm a little out of touch with some spiritual aspects and I'm trying to get more involved in it ya know?
Sevengill 04.02.17	You don't remember my and Jennifer's romantic date last night...?
hal1ax 04.02.17	lol ya snide u gotta be careful bro. talk to your therapist about it or even just google ODD lol. it's basically the child version of antisocial. i mean if u are not a sociopath, u can make the deduction that u never had ODD with virtual certainty.
Snide 04.02.17	I don't think I'm a sociopath, I have emotions and have empathy (even though I do feel pretty detached at times I still feel those things, really strongly at times)
hal1ax 04.02.17	ya i recommend not ever blindly accepting a diagnosis, particularly by MD's . always do your own research on the matter and if it sounds legit and congruent with what u know about yourself//how u feel, then fine, but in this case i mean it's clearly bullshit--the ODD anyway (and prob the adhd tbh)
Snide 04.02.17	The ADHD I was diagnosed with as a kid and rediagnosed with as an adult so I do believe that one, because I'm constantly upbeat, super hyper and have a terrible time focusing.
hal1ax 04.02.17	oh alright. i've just known soooo many people who were misdiagnosed as being ADHD lol. but ya in ur case it could be accurate .
Orb 04.02.17	@malachite. One thing i can suggest right off the bat is reading some books by Alan Watts. Thw Way of Zen immediately comes to mind as its impact on my life has been rather significant. Taoism is a great thing once you grasp it (or rather, ungrasp it!) and things like meditation and yoga, as cliche as it sounds at first, has very real benefits that science has readily backed up. Gotta remember though, meditation rewires the brain for lower stress levels but it takes some time and dedication! Basically my biggest point is to be cognizant of spiritual state (and how it ties into both your emotional and physical beings). The human condition is a journey and never a destination, so make you make the time enjoy the scenery :]
Lord(e)Po)))ts 04.02.17	yeah according to an MD I have both ~severe~ depression and a ~severe~ anxiety disorder which seems pretty rash to me. go get a psych eval, MDs just overgeneralize mental health issues and throw some pills at you
hal1ax 04.02.17	my little sister who is 9 was diagnosed with ADHD based on as much information as "she has some trouble paying attention in class" and would've been put on adderal had my parents been amenable to it. i mean... a 9 year old on amphetamine salt haha. that should be considered fucking malpractice
p4p 04.02.17	you've been playing too much xenogears
TheSpaceMan 04.02.17	holy fuck hal1 that pissed me off so much
Orb 04.02.17	yeah save those study pills for us adults trying to balance partying all weekend with school all week! Kids don't need meth lol
TheSpaceMan 04.02.17	Questionaire for ADHD: do you like doing HW? Y/N Questionaire for depression: are you completely happy with where you are in your life? Y/N prescribe pills as per any Ns circled
hal1ax 04.02.17	lol basically man. so ridiculous
TheSpaceMan 04.02.17	depression/adhd are a spectrum we all fall under. i mean i've never studied medical science, but i personally hate this perception that you either have/dont have these things
Lord(e)Po)))ts 04.02.17	nah for depression its more like "on a scale from kinda depressed occasionally to super depressed every day how totally depressed are you?" -somewhat -a lot -totally full blown gonna die
TheSpaceMan 04.03.17	lol true they give you the illusion of personalized perscriptions
hal1ax 04.03.17	MD's just don't really have anything else in their treatment repertoire aside from pills. and yea you're absolutely right, basically all forms of behavior should be looked at dimensionally rather than dichotomously; and pills should be a last resort, for people with drastic neuro-chemical imbalances who are having serious trouble functioning in life. research even shows that, for example, people diagnosed with major depressive d/o who are actually relatively mild on the spectrum are either unaffected or negatively affected by SSRI's.
Sevengill 04.03.17	I was a freaking guinnea pig for ADHD meds back in middle/high school. ritalin, concerta, adderall, focus factor (yes, it was a sketchy as it sounds), vyvanse, daytrana...eugh.
TheSpaceMan 04.03.17	i cant imagine tinkering with people's chemical balances is the best option for treating a situation as fragile as depression. it also sorta makes you feel hopeless when you're told "here these pills work and are the only option" and they inevitably dont cure anything. thats gotta be psychologically hard to handle knowing your happiness is dependent on what you swallow
TheSpaceMan 04.03.17	also fuck vyvanse i got legit meth mites and intense sores from it. my doctor actually didnt believe me either since there, at least at the time, wasnt any other medical evidence of that happening to people
hal1ax 04.03.17	yea i mean SSRI's are ideally supposed to just act as a transient platform in attaining or reattaining mental stability. they basically just put a floor and ceiling on your moods; so for example, they can really help people who are suicidal because they can help to attenuate and contain those drastic plummets in mood, but that's all they do--they don't actually re-frame your perceptions or magically extinguish your depressive state, but rather they put you in a more advantageous position to do that yourself, which is why taking them alone without actively partaking in talk therapy or attempting to change your mindset is ineffective. but yea, ideally, once they help get you out of that seemingly abyssal mental rut, and you are able to build more adaptive patterns//perceptions etc. then you are supposed to get off or ween off of the pills. the problem is that a lot of ppl just get on antidepressants and don't actually work toward changing themselves or dealing with anything and this results in them not really making any progress which in turn makes them more perennially dependent or seemingly dependent on the drug. once u are able to recontextualize your mental state, the mood-container invoked by the pills is no longer needed
TheSpaceMan 04.03.17	damn that was really well explained, i def had some misconceptions about them. but i totally agree, it gives you a fake sense of security. if its limiting your moods to a stable neutral, you arent gonna be able to work to do that naturally which would be obviously ideal
hal1ax 04.03.17	definitely. the misconception surrounding SSRI's is probably the most hindering thing about them. just the idea of this pill being your cure-all remedy can induce a sense of stagnation and complacency in people. they can only help clear the path toward finding a solution, but will never be the solution themselves.
guitarded_chuck 04.04.17	i dont care enough to come to a conclusion whether or not i believe him i started ssris once but they gave me dead dick so i was like well if i cant fuck im definitely not going to be happy fug this
EphemeralEternity 04.04.17	but when you're severely depressed do you really even care about fucking? Ideally you want your mood to be lifted/stabilized without limp dick and some ppl gotta experiment with a few before they find one that doesn't have that side effect.
WatchItExplode 04.04.17	I glad there are like two people here who question this diagnosis.
hal1ax 04.04.17	very questionable indeed.
WatchItExplode 04.04.17	I've been working inpatient psych for 14 years and never come across so much as a whiff of it. I have encountered a large number of males with prominent cluster B traits, however.
hal1ax 04.04.17	oh? i've encountered a few male narcissists / antisocials but i've never come across a male with the other cluster B's -- histrionic / borderline. that's cool that you're so experienced; i've only done a couple internships & worked off-and-on at a psychiatric facility for about 2 years now.
WatchItExplode 04.04.17	Hal you gave some great info in this thread. I'm sure it helped quite a few. There is absolutely some gender bias. Males displaying these traits are much less likely to receive a corresponding diagnosis. They do exist in substantially greater numbers than say dissociative or fugue disorders...at least in my setting. It's a compulsion Xeno, lol. I think you could find a diagnosable borderline/histrionic male on any given message board on the web.