Blood on the Dance Floor
Evolution


1.5
very poor

Review

by Davey Boy STAFF
June 23rd, 2012 | 421 replies | 32,757 views


Release Date: 2012 | Tracklist

Review Summary: Blood on the Dance Floor just won’t go away... And this time, they’re looking to save lives!

Releasing their fifth album in just fifty months, it appears as if Blood on the Dance Floor will not be going away any time soon. The Orlando outfit who get their fans “wetter than Hurricane Katrina” (their words, not mine) are clearly looking to cash in on their schlocky electro-pop while they can. Sure, there has been some gradual growth since their horrid initial output, but improving on Shakespearian lyrics such as “I’ll throw a dildo in your grave, party up and start a rave” and “My cum’s so chunky, it’s like an Oreo McFlurry” really isn’t all that difficult. Following the lead of predecessor ‘All The Rage!’, ‘Evolution’ sees the duo attempting to improve their electronica-heavy production, while continuing to tone down the explicit lyrics. In fact, the consistent theme evident here suggests that each of their fans need their lives saved... And who better to do that than these two gentlemen!?

Before saving lives, however, Blood on the Dance Floor must first raise their credibility by masking their numerous deficiencies as best as possible... And the method of choice on 'Evolution' is distraction. Opener 'Rise & Shine' may do so most successfully, melding every trick in the electronica handbook to form some kind of digestible mess. Layers upon layers of synth, Skrillex's definition of dubstep and distractingly loud four-to-the-floor beats are mixed to the fore, while some background screaming and even a Martin Luther King soundbyte almost allow the poor song-writing and horrendous singing to be ignored. Elsewhere, unconvincing vocals from unknown females - and Good Charlotte's Joel Madden - do not add a great deal of variety, while four spoken-word interludes championing love and optimism contribute nothing but extra cheese.

While Jayy Von Monroe's vocals are occasionally tolerable, Dahvie Vanity's are in desperate need of auto-tune - especially throughout verses where he approaches rapping and spoken-word. Seriously, you just have to listen to his delivery of "Every 14.2 minutes, someone in the United States dies by suicide" at the beginning of 'You Are the Heart' to understand how awful Vanity's voice is. And while Blood on the Dance Floor's intentions may indeed be admirable, one only has to glimpse at the album cover to wonder if the source of this message is the correct one. If that does not do it, then choice lyrics such as "***in' genie without a bottle, I'll grant your wishes if you swallow" ('Fantasyland') and "You always said you would die to be famous, but you never thought it would be because of your anus" ('Revenge Porn') will undoubtedly do so.

With the aforementioned crassness being thankfully kept to a minimum, 'Evolution' is arguably Blood on the Dance Floor's best release to date. However, the remainder of this overlong 56 minute album is far too cheesy for its own good. The problem - and principal reason why this duo has not crossed over into the mainstream - is that this cheesiness never resembles the fun or catchiness of other derided acts such as LMFAO. Nothing here lodges itself in your mind, with the best that can be hoped for being a head-nod or toe-tap to the repetitive beats or rare synth hooks. And even when they do approach delivering a semi-catchy chorus - as on 'Unforgiven', 'Hollywood Tragedy' and 'The Last Dance' - this pair have far too many limitations to ultimately not derail any promise. Maybe the duo could release something passable if they waited a couple of years between albums... More likely, Blood on the Dance Floor just need to go away!

Recommended Tracks: Rise & Shine and Hollywood Tragedy.



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user ratings (276)
Chart.
1.3
very poor
other reviews of this album
DragonHeartstring (2)
Evolution is indeed what this release shows but not to a sufficient degree to call this a good album...


Comments:Add a Comment 
DaveyBoy
Staff Reviewer
June 23rd 2012



20818 Comments

Album Rating: 1.5 | Sound Off

Ahhh, it's great to have that extra space back in the 'Recommended by Reviewer' section.

LifeAsAChipmunk
June 23rd 2012



4854 Comments

Album Rating: 1.0

Why Davey? Why?

Curse.
Contributing Reviewer
June 23rd 2012



7762 Comments


How do you save lives using statutory rape?

Digging: The Menzingers - Rented World

DaveyBoy
Staff Reviewer
June 23rd 2012



20818 Comments

Album Rating: 1.5 | Sound Off

"Why Davey? Why?" Please Forgive Me... I lost a bet.

"How do you save lives using statutory rape?" Is that what happened to my ears?

camaraderie
June 23rd 2012



988 Comments

Album Rating: 1.5

I don't get that high album rating at all. Their old stuff is better.

camaraderie
June 23rd 2012



988 Comments

Album Rating: 1.5

It's only rape if you didn't enjoy it.

LifeAsAChipmunk
June 23rd 2012



4854 Comments

Album Rating: 1.0

Dammit Davey

DaveyBoy
Staff Reviewer
June 23rd 2012



20818 Comments

Album Rating: 1.5 | Sound Off

"I don't get that high album rating at all. Their old stuff is better."

Ummm, no. Taking your comment seriously (always tough to tell with an act like this), the production on this is at least improved, while they lyrics here don't offend. They're still bad, but at least they don't offend.

Another lyrical example of their "old stuff": "Stop the hate, congratulate. You know my name, so eat some Cake".

camaraderie
June 23rd 2012



988 Comments

Album Rating: 1.5

Maybe I just liked them because I was younger then.

Curse.
Contributing Reviewer
June 23rd 2012



7762 Comments


Statutory rape has nothing to do with enjoyment, actually

DaveyBoy
Staff Reviewer
June 23rd 2012



20818 Comments

Album Rating: 1.5 | Sound Off

Maybe!

Hey CW, I was either gonna review this or Make Do & Mend... I did you a favor mate.

camaraderie
June 23rd 2012



988 Comments

Album Rating: 1.5

I wasn't being serious. Beside, that would imply that senor Davey is still a youngster.

DaveyBoy
Staff Reviewer
June 23rd 2012



20818 Comments

Album Rating: 1.5 | Sound Off

Adam Lambert takes offence at your opinion andcas.

Curse.
Contributing Reviewer
June 23rd 2012



7762 Comments


"Hey CW, I was either gonna review this or Make Do & Mend... I did you a favor mate."

In that case DAVEY YOU'RE THE BEST

DaveyBoy
Staff Reviewer
June 23rd 2012



20818 Comments

Album Rating: 1.5 | Sound Off

FEATURED... Sputnik is doomed!

LifeAsAChipmunk
June 23rd 2012



4854 Comments

Album Rating: 1.0

"hands down the gayest album cover I've probably ever seen."

Have you seen my profile pic yet?

"Adam Lambert takes offence at your opinion andcas."

rofl lmfao

Time to get down to business. Davey, I command you to listen to the new Graduate album. Now!

DaveyBoy
Staff Reviewer
June 23rd 2012



20818 Comments

Album Rating: 1.5 | Sound Off

Huh? They no longer exist as a band!

LifeAsAChipmunk
June 23rd 2012



4854 Comments

Album Rating: 1.0

If you read the latest posts on your review, you would know what I'm talking about. : )

jefflebowski
June 23rd 2012



6842 Comments


i love the bio on the band page

DaveyBoy
Staff Reviewer
June 23rd 2012



20818 Comments

Album Rating: 1.5 | Sound Off

"If you read the latest posts on your review, you would know what I'm talking about. : )" The Sun and The Sea... Noted

"i love the bio on the band page" So I should expect an attack from their family & friends some time soon!



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