Off Minor
The Heat Death of the Universe


5.0
classic

Review

by zach USER (28 Reviews)
August 2nd, 2011 | 96 replies


Release Date: 2003 | Tracklist

Review Summary: But Monday morning quarterbacks always focus on the bad

You guys realize that the heat death of the universe is going to be an implosion, not an explosion, right? I mean, the universe is constantly expanding, it grows larger and larger every day. It creeps towards the bounds of existence and turns nothingness into something, no matter how insignificant. When the day comes, it won’t explode. It can’t explode. Where would it go? No, it’s going to be a cataclysmic implosion of existential dread, and existence will be forced to destroy itself.

It will cease to fabricate intricate webs of existence and be forced to look back into itself. It will confront internal demons and atrocities it has neglected for so long. It will deconstruct elaborate fantasies it had designed to hide and distract itself from these hellish memories. It will cease to externalize blame for all its wrong doings and finally accept responsibility for its actions. It will swell and swirl around the pounding drum of truth it has long avoided until it finally encapsulates it and the two move in unison.

After billions of years, it will finally come to know itself.

And then it will die.



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4.4
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other reviews of this album
Alex Robertson STAFF (5)
...

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"Emotional" hardcore perfection....

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Sam Feldman's Rating (5)
...


Comments:Add a Comment 
WeepingBanana
August 2nd 2011


10361 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

sexy

Aids
August 2nd 2011


24184 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

I don't know how the rest of sputnik will feel about this "review" but I think it's brilliant, pos

DiceMan
August 2nd 2011


7068 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

second pararaph feels forced but otherwise this is alright

Voivod
Staff Reviewer
August 2nd 2011


6759 Comments


awesome stuff.



what about the actual music tho?

Digging: The Membranes - Dark Matter/Dark Energy

iarescientists
August 2nd 2011


5864 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

it's like...a metaphor...and stuff

Shrapnel94
August 2nd 2011


2213 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

Awesome, pos'd

mynameischan
Staff Reviewer
August 2nd 2011


17958 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

kill yourself

Maniac!
August 2nd 2011


26320 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

Chan's avatar fits the reaction to this article perfectly.

iarescientists
August 2nd 2011


5864 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

this is just for you chan

Electric City
Emeritus
August 2nd 2011


15744 Comments


rules. write reviews for everything

mynameischan
Staff Reviewer
August 2nd 2011


17958 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

thx zach bb



i'm just mad because if i did this downer would throw a fit

Enotron
August 2nd 2011


7695 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

best reviewer on the site

Electric City
Emeritus
August 2nd 2011


15744 Comments


if you did this id make sweet love to your profile picture

iarescientists
August 2nd 2011


5864 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

i got downer in the palm of my hand

wabbit
August 2nd 2011


7057 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

that's illegal downer

wabbit
August 2nd 2011


7057 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

also ya you are my favourite reviewer.

ffs
August 2nd 2011


5014 Comments


the sweet death of the universe

demigod!
August 2nd 2011


47105 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

the meat death of the universe

Trebor.
Contributing Reviewer
August 2nd 2011


51590 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

the skeet death of the multiverse



robertsona
Staff Reviewer
August 2nd 2011


15114 Comments


- Alex Robertson



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