Review Summary: If Bring Me The Horizon and a very, very dumb toad had a baby, it would be Waking The Cadaver.
In every community, there are many different people. Some are studious and pragmatic, working hard and hoping to eventually have the effort pay off. Others, however, are outgoing and carefree, paying no heed to the future and striving only to entertain themselves. Some people strengthen their minds through study, others strengthen their bodies through exercise. And then, there are some that go around pretending to be Satan’s spawn and bragging about how they are so “brutal” and how they would love to go kill some virgins. One day, five such people met each other, had a conversation about blood and evisceration, and formed the deathcore band, Waking The Cadaver.
It seems that the goal of Waking The Cadaver is to be very heavy and loud. In fact, it seems that they want to be heavier and louder than any other band. Apparently, they tried to accomplish these goals so hard that they forgot about (in their eyes) unimportant things, like originality, emotion, and, most importantly, quality.
Everything that is to be found in the band’s demo tape has been done before countless times, and yet has rarely been so poorly executed. Waking the Cadaver alternates between banal, uninspired chug and banal, uninspired tremolo-picking. Almost all of the riffs are indistinguishable from one another, as most chugs are detuned, open chords played in identical patterns, and almost all of the tremolo-picked riffs consist of two or three notes played rather quickly. To create variety, the band adds numerous breakdowns, but these all end up being even more bland chug.
On top of the bland, unvaried riffs, there are the vocals. The vocalist can be easily compared to an enraged, or perhaps maimed, toad. At times, it even sounds like his stomach was growling, and he decided to record it. Throughout the entire demo, the singer gurgles and croaks, so none of the words are discernible. However, the listeners inability to understand the lyrics is a saving grace, rather than a downfall of the album, for they resemble perverted fantasies of a gore-obsessed, mentally unstable thirteen year old. No traces of subtlety or sincerity are seen in the blatant lyrics, which rely only on shock value. Lines like this only display the pathetic immaturity and stupidity of the band:
Tonight this c*** will pay.
My d*** will beat her face.
Her life and her c*** are mine.
This slut shall now see.
To seem powerful and evil, the lyrics all involve numerous expletives and obscenities, and all songs are about rape, murder, mutilation, or a mixture of these three themes. Contrary to the band’s intentions, these texts only cause Waking The Cadaver to be more harmless and self-parodic.
And so, Waking The Cadaver is the epitome of vapidness and dullness. In trying to be the most “br00tal” band of all time, they became a farce; a laughingstock fully deserving of all the jests directed towards it. Unless you want a good laugh, avoid this album.
