Blended Puppies
Blended Puppies EP


4.0
excellent

Review

by CrucifyTheInnocents USER (2 Reviews)
March 11th, 2010 | 26 replies | 3,618 views


Release Date: 2010 | Tracklist

Review Summary: BLENDED MOTHERF--KIN' PUPPIES!!!

0 of 3 thought this review was well written

Blended Puppies, a phrase that Barack Obama will one day shower upon America's young minds. A phrase that will shatter castles and burnt churches into tiny shards of destruction. A name that, one day, will be so significant, the nation of Russia will bow down to it's sheer brutality. A phrase that will be in a dictionary, with the definition: "Eccentric music for the bored teens of America". A phrase that will, one day, be said on live TV by Glen Benton and Matt *sigh* Heafy. Ladies and Gentlemen, my brother the failure, Blended Motherf--kin' Puppies!

Let me set the record straight. Blended Puppies are a grind - I mean - Parody Grind band, who enjoy taking the piss out of bands like Insect Warfare, Agoraphobic Nosebleed and Napalm Death. That's obvious straight away, just by looking at the song lengths via MySpace can you see that they are heavily influenced by Agoraphobic Nosebleed's Altered States Of America. Now, don't despair, because the Blended Puppies EP is a fun listen, in an apathetic way. Overall, it contains few riffs, although the riffs that are there are pretty tight and fairly immense. The drumming, or lack of it, should not annoy any one, because two tracks featuring grind drumming, courtesy of Jack who handles vocals, guitars, bass and drums.

So, it seems that Blended Puppies is a one man project, although they have another member, Yusuf, who handles the extra-complicated riffs and solos. The EP opens up with Prelude To Brutality, which is an eleven second long acoustic opening, before cutting straight in with I Hate Pythagoras And His Useless Theory, which lasts only seven seconds. The EP then continues in the same manner, although it really pulls out all the stops when you get to You Want Me To Date You? No Thanks, Honey, I'd Rather Burn My Eyes Out With Hot Coals. This is one of two tracks that feature the immense grind drumming, and is more instrumental than anything, as drums are the only instrument. Roses Dipped In The Blood Of A Violated Kitten follows on in the same manner, being instrumental again, featuring more intricate drumming.

The production is fairly poor, although it has been recorded straight onto Audacity. This may turn on fans of black metal or lo-fi recordings.

Overall, the album is a fun listen. It pokes chopsticks into the side of grindcore until it cries in a corner somewhere. The album is very experimental, with hints of minimalism and sections that will make you go "Wtf?!". And, besides, the whole EP is only two minutes long, so why not treat yourself to two minutes of pure lolage? What?! Microsoft Word doesn't recognize the word 'lolage'?


user ratings (29)
Chart.
2.5
average

Comments:Add a Comment 
CrucifyTheInnocents
March 11th 2010



63 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

Oh fuck yeah. Check this shit out: http://www.myspace.com/blendedpuppies

IGotShotInTheFace
March 11th 2010



444 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5 | Sound Off

Lol. This album's pretty good.

IGotShotInTheFace
March 11th 2010



444 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5 | Sound Off

What?! Microsoft Word doesn't recognize the word 'lolage'?


Lol.

You Want Me To Date You? No Thanks, Honey, I'd Rather Burn My Eyes Out With Hot Coals


Lol.

I Hate Really Long Tracks That Don't Fit Onto My 4GB iPod, So I'll Keep This Short... Of Course I'm Joking, I'm Sure You've Realized That By The Time You've Seen The Track Length...


Lol. This is why I love this band.

Two of the songs you've mentioned aren't on the album, they must've made some changes. I'll see if I can get the mods to sort it out.

bloozclooz
March 11th 2010



1770 Comments


yarumph

Crymsonblaze
March 11th 2010



7479 Comments


Album's pretty wicked.

Makes me love to hate grindcore.

IGotShotInTheFace
March 12th 2010



444 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5 | Sound Off

Totally.

IGotShotInTheFace
April 29th 2010



444 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5 | Sound Off

Oh, yeah, awesome album.

Jaskolkaaa
April 29th 2010



330 Comments


LOL this album cracked me the fuck up

Jaskolkaaa
April 29th 2010



330 Comments


LOL this album cracked me the fuck up

IGotShotInTheFace
April 30th 2010



444 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5 | Sound Off

In a good way?

Ghostechoes
April 30th 2010



1353 Comments


What a stupid band name.

Zip
April 30th 2010



5312 Comments

Album Rating: 1.0

The entire concept of this band is stupid, it's pretty obvious

Athom
Staff Reviewer
April 30th 2010



17196 Comments


did i just see somebody cleverly name drop a Thursday song title in a grind review?

IGotShotInTheFace
April 30th 2010



444 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5 | Sound Off

Fuck yeah. Thursday. They are parodying grindcore y'know.

IGotShotInTheFace
April 30th 2010



444 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5 | Sound Off

Oh yeah, this is being streamed on their myspace page.

Athom
Staff Reviewer
April 30th 2010



17196 Comments


one of their most underrated songs too.

IGotShotInTheFace
April 30th 2010



444 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5 | Sound Off

Full Collapse is a good album, but my favourite Thursday track is Between Rupture And Rapture.

IGotShotInTheFace
April 30th 2010



444 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5 | Sound Off

Listening now... Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig.

Ghostechoes
April 30th 2010



1353 Comments


Is this available on vinyl?

IGotShotInTheFace
April 30th 2010



444 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5 | Sound Off

Lol. no. Just streamed on myspace.



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